


Alterniate

by talkfast



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Black Romance, Comedy, Disability, Drama, Dream Bubbles, F/F, F/M, Hemospectrum, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Red Romance, Time Travel, Troll John, author makes an appearance, cross-cultural communication, estimations of troll biology, leave your expectations at the title, ridiculously self-indulgent, time and space shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-15
Updated: 2015-06-28
Packaged: 2017-12-05 09:16:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 91,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/721395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/talkfast/pseuds/talkfast
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A machine on the meteor sends John through time and space to live as a troll on Alternia, only sweeps before it was destroyed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Future

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Homestuck fanfiction and it is long, vaguely comedic, convoluted and complicated, with references that you won't entirely understand because they don't make sense and time loops that made me want to tear my hair out. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I loved - adored! - writing it.

The machine towers over the humans and trolls, set against one wall of the room. Inorganic material is arranged organically; panels of hard, silver metal laid over each other like scales. Unmarked levers and switches stick out around lifeless screens. It’s large and mostly rectangular, with a long piece at the top that extends across the ceiling and very nearly over them. 

Jade has been looking up at it with admiration and is the first to step forward. Kanaya stops her with a light touch to her arm. “I do not think that would be wise.”

“That’s weird.” For once John is frowning. “Everything else we’ve found has been old and dusty. This looks really clean.”

“Maybe, it’s been used,” Tavros offers hesitantly.

Karkat isn’t sure what to make of it, so he turns to the only one of them that might have some idea. “Sollux?”

He half-shrugs at Karkat, staring up at the machine like he expects it to move or start talking, offer up any clue to them what it is for. “It’th not Alternian, that’th all I can thay for thertain.” 

“It’s not human, either,” Rose says and her voice is just a little too quiet.

Kanaya is looking at her and not the machine.

“That part of it,” Jade leans forward and gestures loosely, “is a lot like Grandpa’s transmaterializer. I’m not sure about that part, there, but if I had to guess I would say it has something to do with that bit over there, because they’re lined up with each other.”

“How do you mean?”

Karkat groans. “Oh for gog’s sakes, John, don’t encourage her!”

They ignore him and stand closer to each other, Jade pointing out what she was talking about to make sure that he can see. “A lot of machines are made like houses. If you have a square, that’s a room. Wires connect the rooms so that they can work together to make up the whole house. If a square isn’t doing anything, it’s like having a room that no one uses. It doesn’t make much sense and probably shouldn’t be there.”

John nods and Karkat face-palms.

“When I look at a machine like this, I look for the rooms and for the house as well. That’s how I can understand what it’s for and how to fix it when it breaks. With this one, that part there, that’s a square. And...oh, it might be getting a bit complicated here...it’s like a wall, and that part over there is the other wall. Little rooms inside big rooms, I guess.”

“Inside a house,” John says slowly.

She beams at him. “Yes.”

Karkat rubs his hand across his face. “Sollux, tell the humans why they’re wrong.”

“Thorry KK. It maketh a lot of thenth. Blockth and hiveth. It’th like the networkth I uthed to run, back on Alternia.”

Karkat growls in irritation and presses his face into both of his hands. Gamzee shuffles up behind him and paps him on the shoulder. “Cheer up motherfucker.”

“Those panels there, they’re just like windows,” John points out.

“Yes!” Jade claps her hands together. “And they look so, soo familiar! I just can’t remember where I’ve seen them before...somewhere back home, I think!”

Rose takes a small step back, unnoticed by anyone but Kanaya.

“But you can’t see through them.”

“Oh, you’re not meant to! Windows aren’t always for seeing-”

Rose takes another step back, then another, staring at the machine like it was something that she knew but had thought she’d lost. Her back presses gently to the wall and she puts her palms on it, spreading her fingers, staring, as Jade chatters on.

“-sometimes they’re for-”

The machine is completely still, but a light at the top of it flickers to life. Tavros lets out a sound of dismay but no one pays it any attention.

“-oh, I don’t know. Taking you places that you’ve never been-”

No one but Dave, who glances down at the troll and then up at the machine, pulling out a broken sword from his strife specibus when he sees the extended piece of it begin to move.

“-places that you want to, or would never think to go!”

“What is wrong, Rose?” Kanaya reaches out a hand to the girl, who is shuddering inexplicably.

Tavros wheels backwards and then stops, bracing himself and blushing, embarrassed for his own cowardice but determined to stand with the others, even if the metal arm was moving oddly and there was a chance that it would try to kill them in a moment.

Dave gives him a nod without taking his eyes from the machine.

The arm clicks, moving only inches and stopping before repeating the action.

“-but I’m just being silly. My grandson told me about it and he’s very nice, but a little dramatic!” Jade giggles.

They don’t hear Kanaya’s murmur of “Rose?” 

“He sounds like a lot of fun,” John says with a wide smile.

The arm jolts and Dave braces himself to, he doesn’t know, fight off a laser or some shit. The good thing about fighting with broken swords was that you didn’t have to worry about them getting vaporised or whatever by machines that started moving when everyone was distracted by windows and it was just inconvenient. It wouldn’t be the first thing he’d wrecked since they’d started exploring the lab, but the other rogue machines were triggered – by Tav wheeling out onto the wrong bit of floor, by Vantas who thought every warning was a challenge, by heat, sound, light sensors. 

This one just up and decided to dance like the sweetest beats were playing on a frequency only its robo-ears could hear and the only thing it was going to share with them was its own brand of interpretative dance. Slow like it’s prom night, he’s got his arm around some nice girl he desperately wants to take to a hotel after, and also jabbing like he’s going to fucking _romance_ that mouse trap out of its cheese. It’s beautifully ironic. But as much as he appreciates it, Dave prepares himself to fuck its shit up.

Terezi is silent and expressionless. A part of Dave realises she’s never been quiet this long before, the whole time they’ve been on this floating rock. A part of Dave worries. Another, bigger part of him tells him to grip his sword tighter and make sure that she doesn’t get hurt. He’ll ask her later what she was thinking about.

“Shit, KK. I don’t know what it’th doing.”

Taking his hands away from his face, Karkat curses himself for putting them there in the first place. How could he have let his guard slip? He should have been paying attention, because Egbert and Harley weren’t, just yammering on to each other with those fucking grating human smiles, all blunt teeth and pity that hurt you because it didn’t mean anything. Like friendship was a disease they just wanted to infect everyone with, no matter if they had fucking better things to do, like keep the group from falling apart the way he knew it would if he didn’t keep such a close eye on it.

Gamzee’s got that lazy grin on his face as he pushes Karkat gently back and stands in front of him. “Might be getting all motherfucking dangerous up in here. You get your chill on, my best motherfucker.”

Karkat exchanges a look with Sollux, horrified where the other is grimly accepting.

“Rose, tell me what is wrong.”

“You’d really like him! Oh, what’s that?”

The arm jolts, whirs another few inches and jolts again.

Jade takes a step forward so that she can take a closer look at the machine. “I think that might be writing.”

“Rose should take a look at it,” John says and turns.

He sees Rose backed against the wall, Kanaya touching her shoulder like she’s afraid that she’ll break. Terezi not moving. Gamzee shielding Karkat who’s about to start pounding on the bigger troll’s back. Sollux touching his arms, Dave with his sword drawn, Tavros looking utterly scared and facing upwards.

And he understands that it was a mistake to come into this room.

And he looks up at the mechanical arm stretching out above him.

And he blinks.

Then grips Jade’s shoulder more forcefully than he ever would if they weren’t in immediate danger, not tightly enough to hurt but more than enough to get her attention and draw her away from the machine. She stumbles back into Terezi and he feels sorry that he used too much strength with her, but it doesn’t matter right now. The arm clicks and whirs, moving smoothly as if it is scanning the room. It rotates from one side to the other, again and again, too slowly to be anything but ominous.

Even as Karkat cries out in protest – telling him what an idiot he is, probably – John uses his powers to send a breath of wind up and past the arm, the light at the top of the machine blinking red erratically like a message in Morse code. Then he catches up a gust underneath his feet and flips up into the air, landing on the top of the console.

The arm folds up into itself so that it can point towards him, as if it can see him there. And he really hopes it doesn’t, or it will make him feel so awful for what he is about to do.

“EGBERT WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING GET THE FUCK DOWN HERE RIGHT THE FUCK NOW!”

John smiles to himself and his hammer drops into his hand. He pounds into the light because, gosh, red is never a good thing, and then again, hearing the crazed whirring of a machine too damaged to work properly.

“DON’T- YOU FUCKING MORON WHAT THE FUCK, HOW CAN YOU BE SO INCOMPREHENSIBLY STUPID-”

“Egbert are you sure you really want to get the robot all excited? I don’t want it pulling me into a mechanical samba down here, Tav’s nodding at me, yeah he’s not down with that either-”

The arm is still for a while before lunging forward at him. John dodges it pre-emptively, flipping back over himself and landing on the console again.

Someone cries out. He thinks it was Jade.

He pushes up just in time for another lunge then brings his hammer down on the arm with an audible crack. It jolts, twitching like he’d just doused it with water. Gosh, the end looked sharp. He hadn’t realised it. Almost like a needle...

“GAMZEE LET ME GO, YOU- ARGH!”

“Egbert that’th not enough to fry it! The thing ith huge, I don’t know where the thircuitboardth are. You don’t know where to hit. It’th not going to get any weaker, you’re jutht hitting a thcuttlebeatht until it thnapth at you!”

John considers that for a moment, then hammers into the base of the arm. It doesn’t do much, Sollux is probably right, but the metal bends in on itself from the force of the impact. He flies up and looks over the machine, trying to find a good place to attack.

The arm swings wildly after him then draws back almost to its original position.

He drives into one of the screens and sparks fly out, surprising him because he doesn’t know much about how computers work, but he thought that when they were turned off the electricity didn’t run through.

“THIS COUNTS AS A HEROIC DEATH, YOU ABSOLUTE FUCKING IDIOT! GET THAT THROUGH YOUR REDUNDANT THINK PAN AND SAVE US ALL THE TROUBLE OF WATCHING YOU GET YOURSELF KILLED IN THE STUPIDEST WAY POSSIBLE. JEGUS, YOU’RE LIKE A CLIMBINGBEAST UNFAMILIAR WITH AN APICULTURE NETWORK, JAMMING HIS HANDS INTO IT UNTIL THE BEES AMASS AROUND HIS NECK TO FATALLY WOUND HIM AND HE FALLS INTO A PUDDLE OF MIND HONEY-”

Two years living on this meteor with the trolls means that John is pretty good at ignoring Karkat’s angry ranting. His hammer crashes into one of the windows and he is actually a little sad to see it shatter and break. He wants to whistle but doesn’t think Karkat would appreciate that, not with the way he’s working himself up over John’s imminent death.

“You want some help up there, bro?”

John laughs breathlessly and hears Karkat scream a long, frustrated word that doesn’t make sense. “I’m okay! Thanks Dave.”

“Always got your back, man.”

He flips over the arm, looking back at it as he does...

...and that turns out to be a mistake, because the body of the machine is somehow closer than he thought, and as he tries to push off it the arm comes around and cuts into his chest, near his shoulder but not near enough for him to be sure that he’s going to be okay. His god tier clothes become quickly wet with blood and he blinks in stunned surprise for a second before sweeping himself up in his wind and lifting up and away from the thing that had wounded him. It doesn’t follow.

Red blood drips down his arm and off his fingers and it doesn’t hurt as much as John thinks it should. It feels like a cold burn, fire and ice at the same time, but he can block it out and still move so he’s probably okay, right? He stares down at the machine, floating in mid-air out of its reach. When he glances at the others Dave looks grim, Tavros terrified, Jade is crying and Karkat...his yellow eyes are staring numbly at something on the ground, one hand fisted into the back of Gamzee’s shirt. 

John looks down. Ah. It’s the droplets of his blood. He curls his fingers into his palm to stop more blood from falling. That red is Karkat’s red. He feels sorry, so sorry that he is making the troll look at blood that could very well have been his own.

He takes his hammer into his hand, slicked with blood and harder to grip. Then he rushes down to the machine as fast as he can, wanting to close his eyes and feel dizzy and have the people he loves take care of him, but knowing that Dad isn’t here and he’s been injured before, killed before, he can’t be childish and give into it just because he wants to. Because he needs to finish what he started and hammer this thing into tiny little pieces.

“John, shit-” Dave cusses just loudly enough for him to hear.

“You can’t kill a computer jutht by hitting it!” 

And he understands, really he does, but this seems like something that he has to do. For his friends. To keep them as safe as he wants them to be.

He’ll be all right. He’s always all right.

“Get your calm on, bro,” Gamzee is saying to a struggling Karkat. “Watch him break apart this motherfucker.”

“John...” Jade says painfully.

“JOHN!” The scream is so loud, blood-curdling, surprising enough to stop him in his tracks and turn his head quickly to the person that made it. Rose is shaking, tears running down her usually composed face, but she isn’t looking at him. She’s looking at the ground a way in front of her like there’s something there, but there isn’t, it’s confusing him-

The arm hits him brutally in the back, sending his body flying.

Gamzee is a big motherfucker, and he has a duty to the little motherfuckers to catch them when they ought to be all motherfucking up and catched. He takes a step forward and John is in his arms, lighter than a bottle of his wicked elixir, and he guesses that’s thanks to the windy thing he is all like to do. “It’s a motherfucking miracle,” he sighs down at the human he’s holding. John isn’t moving but that’s okay, they can chill out and just be as they motherfucking are. The red on his neck reminds him of his best friend, and Gamzee ain’t going to pass up an opportunity to taste him, so he leans forward and swipes his tongue over it.

His best friend puts his hand on his face and Gamzee licks it, just fucking grateful for all the miracles that are happening right now. They’re all coming together and bleeding and tasting and motherfucking doing what their hearts are all up and telling them, and Karkat’s fingers taste like his tears and it’s motherfucking beautiful. His best friend and the windy boy are going to confess their pity today and it’s beautiful and he is just the happiest motherfucker that ever motherfucking was.

“Jegus, just put him down you sick fuck.” Karkat is pale and his hands are shaking a little. If anyone asked why he’d tell them it was because his moirail had just licked them like they were candy. As close as they are there are some things about Gamzee that freak him right the fuck out.

“Is he okay?” Dave asks from where he has stayed standing, watching the damaged arm sway a little as it rotates from side to side, the way it had earlier.

That’s not a question Karkat wants to answer because it’s not a question he wants to ask in the first place. Blood is pouring out onto the floor and he doesn’t want to look at it. Doesn’t want to look at John either because he’s so pitiful, more red than blue now and if he weren’t so worried out of his goddamn mind for the idiot he’d be teasing Sollux about it.

Wants to look at John because he’s so pitiful it makes Karkat’s heart ache, twisting up until he begins to pity himself for pitying this human so much.

Gamzee’s humming and it should annoy the hell out of him but somehow from him it’s comforting. He wants to hold his hand and knows that he can, but he also wants to...bring John back to life, if he can, if that will even work. Karkat wants to lean in close and smell the blood on him, pity him even more for it – humans, so weak, so easily broken – touch their lips together so John can open his pathetic, strange blue eyes and realise how pitiful Karkat is for caring about him so much, and then...hell if he knows. Sloppy interspecies makeouts? – John should pity him for just wanting to go back on his law, whether he actually will or not.

Terezi’s pressing her face up close to his and sniffing. She bares her teeth but doesn’t laugh and Karkat scowls at her (a little tearfully, but he’ll never admit it). He puts up a hand quickly before she can lick at his tears and she licks it instead. “Ugh, what is the sudden fascination with licking my hand...”

“You won’t let me lick him.” She angles her head to John, both looking and sounding sad.

“No,” Karkat bites out, “I won’t.”

She bares her teeth again. He surprises himself by growling at her, deep in his chest. Terezi draws back a little, then hits him almost fondly across the back of the head. In a moment she’s gone and it’s just Karkat and John again, and deep, red rivulets of blood.

Kanaya gazes at them from where she is standing, unsurprised by what she sees and wondering if John is still alive. Her arm itches to go around Rose, but they are not moirails, merely friends, and she thinks the gesture would be unwelcome. Her red sentiment cannot be enough for two on its own, as much as she feels for the other girl. What can be held in one heart will never be enough for two.

Instead she runs her fingers lightly a short way down her shoulder, never increasing the pressure, never pulling away. Rose must know that she is there for her in whatever capacity she is wanted. 

She cries prettily but she cries nonetheless. Rose is not unendingly strong, just as Kanaya is not unendingly patient. She thinks that they understand each other somehow. Perhaps not as much as she would like, but enough. Rose has not moved since she last cried out, her eyes hazed over from a vision. Kanaya pities her for having to see what happened before it did and hopes she will not have to be the one to tell her that she caused it.

John is lying on the ground where Rose had been looking a minute ago. It was an unfortunate prophecy that, in the revealing of it, caused itself to become truth.

Rose’s eyes clear and she looks at John with emotion in her eyes that hurts Kanaya to see. Her fingers stop moving though they do not pull away. Then her Rose looks over to Gamzee, standing away from his moirail and watching him with a delighted smile on his face. As they watch, together, the forgotten, winding arm of the machine spikes down and tears at his arm.

Dave gets two hits in before the arm retracts, cursing at it once, which is more of a loss of control than they are accustomed to from him.

Not seeming to feel the pain of the bloody gash, Gamzee looks at it mildly and puts his hand over it, taking it away to see the patchy violet stain of his blood, then putting it back again.

Karkat stares at him, clearly uncertain whether he should care for his moirail or potential matesprit when both of them are injured.

Above them the arm rotates. Clicks. Rotates. Stops. Clicks. Clicks again. The light on the top of the machine goes green. They watch it warily, somehow understanding that what is about to happen is both unwelcome and not physically dangerous. Dave’s weapon is held more loosely at his side and Tavros wheels closer to him.

Karkat doesn’t give a shit about any of that because Gamzee is nodding at him, telling him that it’s all right to take care of John now. For one thing Gamzee is so out of it he doesn’t seem to even feel what’s been done to him. For another John is much more likely to be dead. 

When his eyes flutter open Karkat could freaking kiss him just from the relief. His mouth shapes words that aren’t spoken. John stares up at Karkat with his weird alien eyes and says, “Oh.”

The arm stops. Rotates. Stops. Rotates a much shorter distance. Stops. Clicks. Rotates. Like it’s honing in on someone. Because that is exactly what it is doing. Rotates. Stops. Rotates.

Tavros fumbles for Dave’s hand and Dave looks down at it, visibly surprised, surprising people that Dave Strider is for once visibly anything other than completely cool. Tavros doesn’t seem to notice and keeps staring up at the big frightening metal thing that might be about to kill one or both of them.

Terezi shifts her feet.

Rose pulls away from Kanaya’s hand. She is crying again, looking at the broken window.

Sollux rubs at his eyes, cursing that his vision isn’t as good since he was un-blinded. He can’t quite see the arm because it is moving too quickly for him to easily focus on.

The arm rotates and stops and stays stopped.

John feels numb, but he knows he’s injured. It wasn’t enough to kill him or really hurt him, because quite honestly once you’d died you were pretty much set for not feeling too bad about pain for the rest of forever. There was always something to compare it to which made it seem better, easier. He’d survived a lot worse. He was always all right.

His eyes look up into Karkat’s, seeing the tears in them, feeling his arm supporting some of his weight, the warmth of his body pressed against his side. And god, it feels weird. This was the weirdest thing that had happened since Karkat’s weird kissmess thing. It sort of seemed like the guy was playing around with him. 

‘John, be my weird hate-thing. What, you said no? This is kind of super awkward. Let me go back and make you friends with me by being ridiculously stupid-charming. When we meet I’ll yell at you a lot and also ask you to watch movies with me, and then I’ll yell at you during the movies and maybe sometimes smile just to mess up your head a bit. Are we friends? No, who would be friends with an idiot human like you, John Egbert! Are we kissmesses?' Not even an answer for that, because it turns out John had no idea what the whole thing really meant. 'Gamzee is my moirail! I’m going to kiss him on the cheek all the time to make you unsure what’s really going on! Then when you get hurt and come to afterwards I’m going to be holding you like I lo...love you more than anything in the entire world, and look at you like you are the entire world, and not swear or yell or anything for a whole, like, minute because my name is Karkat and I just like confusing the shit out of you when you’ve lost a lot of blood.”

As if to illustrate his point, Karkat sort of leans forward and touches John lightly on the face. He makes a small noise, though he’s not sure why he did it or what it meant. All he can do – he has lost a _lot_ of blood, after all – is look at Karkat’s grey red-tinged eyes and think, more than ‘god his eyes are so alien-y’, ‘god, I wish I’d been close enough to see them before’. And he’s not sure why he thought that or what it means.

Karkat leans in closer, running his fingers along John’s lip and looking a bit like he’s trying not to cry, and it’s sad to see because Karkat is usually too strong for tears, the last one of them to cry about anything, even with Gamzee. And he knows because Gamzee tells him everything about Karkat, so John is pretty sure he knows Karkat rather well. There’s not a doubt in his mind that Karkat is screwing with him right now.

So when his fingers slide over his mouth John pokes out his tongue and licks them.

Karkat freezes and stares at him, then at his hand.

“Oh jegus fuck you are the third person to do that, what the fuck is everybody on today, are you just all fucking drinking sopor or eating the fucking mind honey when my back is turned, gog almighty-”

John has no idea what he’s talking about but Karkat’s face is funny so he begins to, painfully, laugh.

A bright light builds up at the end of the arm, funnelling out from the body of the machine. Dave mutters something about lasers.

When it is fired it tears past him and everyone else, shot straight into an oblivious, laughing John, who is caught up in the light and immediately disappears.

The arm drops and the light goes off on the machine. 

Karkat is still sitting with his hand raised in disgust and it takes him a minute and Gamzee actually pulling him up to stand before he realises that John is gone. He stares at his hand, with blood and saliva on it, and shakily wipes it on Gamzee’s shirt. The other troll doesn’t seem to mind.

In contrast, Kanaya realises immediately that this was what Rose had seen. Not John becoming wounded, but John vanished at the whim of an as of yet unfamiliar and unpredictable machine. She cannot bear to touch her shoulder and steps away. Rose gives her a faint smile.

Terezi is frowning blatantly, sniffing the air. “I can’t smell John.”

“He’s gone.” Dave’s voice is oddly hollow and his statement has the touch of a question.

Jade falls onto Tavros and they hug as she sobs uncontrollably.

“Holy shit. KK, are you okay?”

Instead of swearing Karkat is shaking. When Gamzee draws him in so that his face is pressing into his chest he doesn’t say anything. The humming starts up again, a gesture of comfort that is so out of place, but Karkat sinks into him, bloodied hands clenching in the fabric of his shirt like he wants to fight but all he can do is cry.

“What kind of machine is this?” Kanaya’s voice is calm but her thoughts are disjointed.

“John’s gone somewhere, John’s gone somewhere and I don’t know where he is. I’m meant to know but I _don’t_ , he’s just not here and he _should_ be, this wasn’t meant to happen. That machine, it’s a transmaterializer but that’s just a little part of it. It’s taken John. He’s not here anymore. It would be worse, god, so much worse if he was somewhere we would never find him, living on his own. I almost… I almost wish...” Jade makes a wretched sound. 

Her feelings go suddenly from grief to anger. She pushes away from Tavros and screams at the machine more loudly than any of them had thought her capable of. “GIVE HIM BACK! Give him _back_ , you no-good lousy piece of shit!”

Unsurprisingly, it does not respond.

Jade screams a nearly inhuman sound and raises her hands, eyes a brighter green behind her glasses. She lashes out at the air in front of her as if fighting an invisible enemy. The arm of the machine crushes in on itself, twists, folds and breaks off from the body, falling to the ground.

“Jade!” Kanaya calls to her.

“Jade, thtop! We can’t know what’th happened if you dethtroy it!”

Her hand stops, fingers curled like she’s scrunched up a piece of paper, and the machine wavers as she does, trembling until she screams again in frustration and lowers her arms. For a moment her body is stiff with uncharacteristic rage. Then her knees bend and she falls to the ground, crying to herself.

With wide eyes and half-pressed into Gamzee’s shoulder, Karkat murmurs something the others can’t make out. Gamzee pats him heavily on the back.

“What happened?” Terezi asks, the person who has interacted with John the least over the last two years. It’s clear she doesn’t know how to react.

In an instant Dave is standing differently, a little further away from Tavros. He turns his head to Rose expectantly.

“Where is he?” Tavros’ voice is soft.

“On Alternia.”

Each of them turns to Rose, who smiles as benevolently as a Seer really ought to before she divulges plot-centric information.

“...what the fuck?” Sollux says finally.

Terezi sniffs at her. “Alternia is gone.”

“Yes. But none of us can plaintively deny that it once existed. A planet lost in a universe abandoned, far beyond the reach of human fingers. Destroyed now, but once for feet to tread. And this machine is even more complex than I have come to expect from this place.”

“Ditch the routine for once, Lalonde. None of this looking into glass balls, ‘I see a tall dark stranger and he wants to get in your pants’ bullshit. Tell us what happened to my bro.”

Rose frowns slightly at him.“Very well, Dave. I’ll depart with my air of intrigue for the moment. Though you best of all of us should realise that if we have anything now, it is time.”

“Is that what you are saying? John went back to Alternia?” Kanaya is a little breathless and her words set off the other trolls.

“Oh fuck no. He’ll be dead in thecondth.”

Terezi just cackles like the psychopath they all sort of suspect her to be.

Karkat pushes away from Gamzee. “What? You mean that machine can take us back?”

“Whatever ideas you’re having, get rid of them immediately,” Rose says, narrowing her eyes. “We’re here for a reason. John, it seems, is there for a reason. Any reality where you attempt to use the machine for your own perceived benefit leads to a doomed timeline. It doesn’t work that way, and it oughtn’t, because he has gone back to a time when you and your friends lived on Alternia. Attempting to send yourself or any other troll back would result in a paradox.”

“Why is he there?” Kanaya asks quietly.

“That end will reveal itself.”

“Rose, I said no bullshit.”

She inclines her head. “Knowing what is likely to eventuate is occasionally tedious. I resort to flowery language to make it more interesting for myself.”

“John...” Karkat’s voice is weak.

“Yes. He’s quite safe – well, as safe as one can be on Alternia,” Rose amends. “It’s not a very welcoming place.”

“Shut up. It made us stronger,” he says gruffly.

“Oh, I have no doubt it did that. Though I wonder if John will see it the same way.”

Jade gets shakily to her feet. “Rose, what’s happened to him. What’s going on.”

The air around Rose seems to darken as she raises her hands, palms-up, and the corner of her mouth quirks in an unsettling imitation of a smile. “Yes,” she says and it’s almost a hiss. “I have seen it. Not the future, though we all may consider it as that, but the past, for the first time with such clarity. I can still feel the searing heat of the sun in my vision, the biting wind, the language of animals in my bones, never as weak and fragile and human as at that time, in that place, where I truly felt myself to be. Where John was and is now. Alternia.

“This piece of machinery compelled him there, back and in a changed body. At a level beyond our god-tier powers, possessed only by science or perhaps nature, for now I have seen nature do incredible things. It sent John through time and space, to before his own, _second_ birth on a planet we can only know to be different from Earth, but which he will have to _understand_.”

The light strands of her hair have lifted away from her skin as she speaks. The whites of her eyes are somehow brighter, even as the air darkens, reminding them of the time she had gone grimdark. No one is able to raise their voice to her.

“John.” She closes her eyes and the fingers of one hand curl. “Born again.” The fingers of her other hand curl. “In a foreign land.” She tilts her head to the side. “In a foreign body.” Her head tilts to the other side. “But still John.” She sighs. “Our John.” Her eyes open.

“And he will grow in his own time, while we watch him, here. And perhaps, one day, he will be with us again.”


	2. Active

You open your eyes for the first time.

For a while you think you haven’t. It’s black here with darkness. You’re not sure how your eyes are supposed to work, and you can’t reach up and touch them with your tiny legs – you’re not sure why that thought even occurred to you, because these are the only legs you’ve known and there’s no way for you to know how they work either. 

You roll clumsily out of your egg-sac – it was warm in there once, comforting, but you opened it and it got cold. Why did you do that? – and curl up and out, trying to move that way, quite unsuccessfully. The feeling of your segments fitting together and stretching apart is interesting. Funny, somehow. But you don’t know why it would be funny because this is your body and you’ve hardly known anything different.

Your eyes slowly adjust and you can make out the ground, now. Fine dirt with little rocks scattered around, which you just know would cause you a lot of pain if they got in between your segments to the soft muscle underneath. You right yourself easily, belly on the floor, and flex your little rows of legs on either side of your body. They’re funny too. What a funny place you’ve found yourself in.

You chirrup happily, the way you did when you were in the egg and had a nice dream. It sounds different without the slime, membrane and shell around you. It echoes. You want to do it again, but you realise suddenly how silly that would be. After all, this is a dangerous place and you should be trying very hard not to get killed.

Ahead of you is a cave wall, with two tunnels running off from it. There is light coming from one of them, hot yellow, sending the shadows of moving things along the packed red dirt. Just behind you are some abandoned egg-sacs, different shapes and sizes to your own. Trails of slime lead out from them to the tunnels ahead.

You roll in the slime of the other egg-sacs for some reason. Without really meaning to you make a humming sound, which reverberates from the middle of your tiny body. You stop and blink, slipping a little in the slime. Then you trudge messily into the back of one of the sacs to hide. There’s a lot to think about, but you can’t leave yourself vulnerable while you do.

The slime in this egg is a bit different to the one in yours. You want to taste it but don’t think that would be a good idea. Where it’s gotten under your firming exoskeleton it tingles, like it’s burning you. It’s a yellowy colour you think, and that’s a colour you instinctively know to avoid.

Still, it’s pretty, just like the green in the egg next to it. As a compromise you go over to the green slime, which you aren’t so instinctively wary of, and take a less-than-tentative lick.

It tastes like...well, what do you know about what things taste like? You’ve never eaten anything before, except your slime and now this one. All you know is that you don’t mind it at all and it wouldn’t be a bad thing if there was more of this prettily coloured slime where you were going to.

Speaking of, where you were going to was really where you should be going next.

You tumble out of the pile of egg-sacs and chirp to yourself as you wiggle your legs around. When you get to the ground, you roll over for good measure, and soon your body is covered in dirt instead of different coloured slime. That’s surely a good thing, though you aren’t sure why. It’s much better to look like an oddly-shaped rock when there are monsters trying to kill you.

Their growls are echoing through the caverns and it’s their shadows that are being cast along the walls. You’re safe here but you need to get to the surface or you will die here without anything to eat but slime. You fold yourself down with determination, noticing that your segments slide over each other to better protect the lines of near-exposed muscle. It’s like having your own armour. It makes you feel stronger, though these monsters are bigger and older than you and it’s probably not all that much protection. It’s certainly better than these little nubby things sticking out from your head.

You shake your body to try to get them off, thinking optimistically that they are just pieces of egg shell unfortunately stuck to you. The tip of one hits the ground as you wriggle, and it’s a shock of pain that goes through you. It hurts! These useless things are soft and if you’re not careful, you might break them. And for some reason, although you really don’t like them at all, that would be a bad thing.

You rush forward, albeit a little clumsily. If anyone was watching you right now they would certainly think that you were adorable. But you know you are not adorable! No, sir! You are a wiggler going into a warzone, where every battle might cost him his life. If you could say anything to these hypothetical observers of your trials, you would tell them that this is serious business. Serious, deadly business.

The tunnel on the left is a bit darker and a lot quieter than the one on the right, from which you can hear screams and chirps of terror. You decide to go right, following whatever instinct it is that tells you the left tunnel is more dangerous. As you scurry down the tunnel you blink as it gets brighter, your eyes adjusting more slowly than you would like.

You pass mutilated bodies of the others that were born with you. Blood in different colours spatters parts of the walls and floor. You sniff, which is a thing you realise that you can do, but your sense of smell isn’t very good yet. Which is probably a good thing because you don’t want to know what death smells like.

There’s the curled up body of a monster with red blood coming from its head. Without apology you climb over it and ignore the tunnels leading out to your right. You know, somehow, that down those lies only more avoidable danger.

You’ve been lucky so far, but now another wiggler comes out from one of the tunnels slightly ahead of you. It is covered in red and brown blood and looks tired, one of its legs hanging limply. It snarls at you when it hears you coming, preparing itself to attack. You chirrup at it and make a rumbling sound like you did earlier, trying to show it you won’t hurt it. After all, you’re both in the same hell. This grub is sort of like your...weird egg-sibling.

It lunges forward in warning. It doesn’t believe you aren’t a threat. You’re a little sad that, while you’ve been playing in slime, it seems that the others have been fighting with each other.

But you can’t let it think it can just hurt you. You can’t let it think you are weak. That is for some reason the worst thing you can imagine.

You press back, your segments sliding up and foremost legs braced. Then you growl at it, a deep and angry sound that rises up from parts of you you’re surprised you have at such a young age, because you didn’t know this was a thing you could do until you did it. You stop it quickly – you’re not challenging this other wiggler, just telling it not to try anything with you – and make a soft noise as a sort of friendliness. 

It has curled up on its side and returns the sound, recognising your dominance. You’re happy. You don’t want to have to kill any of your own kind.

You both start when a monster crashes down the tunnel. It has a long, smooth-skinned body which writhes as it moves, hitting the walls enough that rocks and dust fall from them. The wiggler pushes quickly out of its position of submission but you ram it with your head, sending it to the protective shadow in the entrance of the tunnel. You growl at it when it tries to protest, then turn on the monster.

It’s either stupid or crazed. You don’t like it. It’s dangerous. Maybe on another day you would show sympathy, but today you have to fight to protect yourself and your friend.

You jump up, pushing with all of your little appendages, landing on the top of its head and staying there only with the help of gravity. In a moment you’ve worked out where its eyes are and bite down in the soft place between them. Its blood tastes good, much better than the slime. It howls and twists but you bite down harder, growling though your teeth are locked. As it becomes wilder you turn your mouth, biting down again, harder, the opposite way. It shrieks and then falls heavily.

Red blood froths at its mouth. Its eyes blink at you, dulled and dying. You coo at it and nuzzle your head underneath its eye. You want to tell it things that you can’t yet express. Feebly it raises a clawed limb to swipe at you, resting near your body. It growls so you growl back at it and curl against its hand, watching its eyes until the light in them goes. Then you rub its hand with your head, rumbling faintly. When you get up you see that your wiggler friend is gone.

* * *

“Holy shit,” Sollux says, for something like the fifth time.

They’ve crowded around Rose’s laptop, which is running a version of Trollian. On the screen are ten different coloured lines, the ‘active’ timelines, with the ‘inactive’ timelines in another window and the ‘future’ timelines tucked away behind them. Rose had quickly closed the window for ‘alternate’ timelines before any of them could look at it, telling them that if they asked any questions they were jeopardising people’s lives and that was just too inconsiderate.

The ‘active’ timelines were those of everyone from their session – the four humans and six remaining trolls, Kanaya, Terezi, Sollux, Tavros, Gamzee and Karkat. They had watched with abject horror/fascination as she opened up a screen showing John at this point on his chronological timeline.

“Though these events are technically occurring in the past – years, or sweeps, ago – if we consider it chronologically, and I will for the sake of ease, this is what happens next for John. That is to say, John was here minutes ago and was sent there. He is by that account, Present John. Though this is John in a past setting. If we go further along his timeline – which we will undoubtedly have to do, again for the sake of ease – I may have been exaggerating about the amount of time we can afford to waste, Dave excepting, for there are events which of course have to happen – but I digress. The Trollian client enables us to watch him grow up and go into his ‘future’, chronologically. All at once we have past, present and future John. While we can’t influence his life in that world we can certainly observe it,” Rose had lengthily explained, with excitement that was hardly disguised.

And in that little window, which the trolls had seen many times before, was an egg. And out of that egg came a wiggler. And they were supposed to comprehend that this was John.

“Holy shit,” Sollux had said.

The initial shock has worn off now and they watch together as wiggler-John waves his many legs around, as if trying to figure out what they are and how to use them. Karkat is quiet as he stares at the screen, gripping the corners of the laptop too tightly. 

Kanaya is smiling, a thing she does rarely enough for them all to feel better for seeing it. “He has a lot of energy for one so young,” she says and laughs when wiggler-John makes a chirruping sound. They had agreed to turn the sound on, though the trolls had rarely used it when watching the humans.

“Whoa, little man,” Dave murmurs as wiggler-John rolls around in the slime. “I don’t think that’s what that shit is for.”

As if he hears him, John stops and blinks.

“It won’t hurt him,” Kanaya says softly without taking her eyes from the screen. “Unless he is a highblood, there won’t be any effect to touching the egg-sac liquids of other blood colours. It may even benefit him. If he is a lowblood but this is not immediately apparent to a lusus, it is more likely he will be chosen.”

They watch as John goes over to eat the slime from another egg.

“Ugh, troll-babies are gross.”

“See? He knows that the liquids are nourishing,” Kanaya says with affection and pride. When John rolls in the dirt a moment later she claps her hands together.

“Camouflage. He hath good inthtincthth,” Sollux notes.

“He’s so...cute.” Jade is wide-eyed. “I didn’t think they would be cute.”

It’s dark on the screen, but from what they can make out wiggler-John is a little bug-thing whose head is almost bigger than his body. He has tufts of black hair and horns, one pointing straight up and the other a wavy line. 

“Let me taste.” That’s all the warning Terezi gives before leaning in and licking the screen. When her tongue comes away a blurry wiggler-John is experimenting with his segmented body. She grins then frowns. “Like John’s human candy.”

“Gushers?” Dave supplies the name. “Go figure. The kid ate so many now he’s a troll he tastes like ‘em.”

Rose wipes the screen with a tissue. “I’m happy enough for you to lick the screen, Terezi. I wouldn’t want you to miss out. All the same, please give me warning when you next decide to do so.”

“His horns are impressive,” Karkat murmurs.

“He’s a formidable motherfucker,” Gamzee agrees. “You just watch him, Karbro. He’ll kill ‘em all. You just watch.”

“They look strong. I couldn’t say for certain, but the colouring seems good. Some horns never harden properly,” Kanaya explains to the humans. “They are functional, but not practical. Trolls whose horns harden quickly when they are wigglers are able to rely on them later in their lives. I don’t believe you ever saw it from us, but we are able to use our horns as weapons. Only Tavros’ were strong enough for that regularly, though.”

“I don’t think he, uhh, likes them, much.” Tavros points at the screen, where wiggler-John is trying to shake them off. He frowns sympathetically. “They, can be very annoying. I hope, they do not get too big.”

“Oh, there he goes,” Jade breathes.

Wiggler-John walks forward clumsily. It’s undeniably adorable to troll and human alike, the way his legs try and fail to work together to carry his tiny body where he wants to go. When he gets to the fork and is walking more confidently, he goes right.

“Clever little fucker,” Gamzee says with approval.

Dave frowns. “Hold up. Why is he going that way?”

“Good instincts. Yeah, you’re right,” Karkat mutters before turning his head to Dave. “You don’t take the easy way out, numbnuts. Think about it. There’s dozens of monsters in the caverns, the scariest shit you will see in your life – at least until you get old enough to travel to the other planets, or are just damn crazy enough to live in the forest that wants to eat you.” He gives Terezi a hard look. 

“Just like people, there’s more stupid ones than smart ones. Sure, the stupid ones’ll try to get a claw through you before they even think about why they’re doing it, but the smart ones are hard to beat when you have soft horns and no weapons other than your nubby little teeth. The smart ones stay quiet, luring any cowardly or foolish wigglers to them. The stupid ones are loud. At least you can hear them coming, that way. On top of all that, as if it wasn’t obvious enough – the stupid ones stay close to the exit. Not a lot of wigglers realise that to get out they have to go towards the things that are trying to kill them.”

“Wow, dude,” says Dave. “That was a whole lot of shit I don’t care about.”

“Yeah, fuck you. Just be happy knowing your friend might not die immediately in the caverns of death, death and more death for every wiggler girl and boy.”

Dave is about to give him a snarky reply, when he sees on the screen that wiggler-John is passing dead, bloodied bodies. “What the fuck?”

“Do you get it now?”

“Why the fuck are you doing that...to your own kids? Fuck, they’re not even kids. Jesus Christ.”

“Yeah, nice to see you caught up with us on that one. We’re on the same page now. Fucking gold star to you.” Karkat turns back to the laptop. “We don’t do this to our wigglers, you ignorant fuckwit. It’s just what happens. It’s not like we’re alone down there, either. On our own we’re pretty near useless, but there’s a lot of us. Just...not a lot us come out.”

“That’s cold.”

“Don’t think I don’t know that. It’s just the way it is. Was.” Karkat’s voice drops to a murmur. “I never wanted John to go through that shit.”

“Good to know you wouldn’t wish death on more babies.” Dave is emotionless, words biting but eyes hidden behind his shades. “Still wasn’t cool of you to not stop it from happening to more of them after you.”

Kanaya tries to explain it to him. “Dave, you don’t understand. These are our ways. This is how it was. It was necessary for the survival of our race-”

“Don’t even try it with me. Don’t even try this shit. It was necessary to kill your little defenceless grub-baby-things so that your race could _survive_? That’s complete bullshit. If John dies in those caverns, when I’m done crying and tearing shit the fuck up, I am going to laugh at you. This is the fucking stupidest thing I have ever heard.”

There is silence for a few moments.

“We’re not defenceless,” Terezi says.

Dave breathes out through his nose, laughter without him laughing.

And they watch as wiggler-John comes across another wiggler, who promptly tries to attack him. Before any of them can say anything, John growls at it, a louder sound than his small body should have been able to make. Even though the sound is mangled by the laptop’s speakers, the trolls watching make a faint rumbling sound in reply. Terezi cackles with laughter, Tavros looks confused and Gamzee actually pets the screen. “Good motherfucker.”

“What the fuck was that?” Dave demands, but the trolls who might bother answering him are too caught up in staring at the screen. Kanaya is in awe.

“It’s submitting,” Rose whispers when she sees the wiggler curl up in front of John.

“Why would it do that-” Dave stops speaking abruptly when the monster appears, at least twenty times bigger than the wigglers. John pushes the other out of the way. John jumps at it, higher than a human could have at any age. John bites it. Kills it. Holds it and makes noises at it as it dies.

“Holy shit,” says Sollux.

* * *

The blood tasted good before, so you make a clicking noise and lick more of it from the wound. This occurs to you as a strange thing you are doing, but you don’t know why it would. You are a wiggler. You don’t know what blood is, just that this red stuff is nice. You are glad it is all over you from the fight. You just hope it doesn’t make other things think you would be tasty.

Your stomach feels full and you nuzzle at the monster again, grateful to it for giving you its blood and dying fairly easily.

* * *

“That is the sickest shit I have ever seen,” Dave said succinctly.

Gamzee pets the screen again and grins at it.

“Holy god.” Dave stares at him, horrified. “He’s like a baby version of you. Rose. Rose, are we sure that’s John?”

Kanaya waves for him to be quiet. “Dave, I understand your misgivings about this natural process, and while I will admit this is not precisely the norm for trolls-”

“Oh fuck. This isn’t normal? I knew it, he’s a baby Gamzee. He’s just goin’ to murder everyone up. While I’m not against some healthy troll genocide – because Terezi has had enough talks with me about that shit, so that’s a done topic on my end – John the human is pretty much the biggest advocate of rights to life ever. That guy can’t stick a firefly in a jar because he thinks it’s mean – and hell, it might be, but you pay a price for beauty, just look at this whole god-tier situation. _John_ doesn’t kill animals and then drink their blood and then...oh my god. Christ, he doesn’t cover himself in it. That’s just...”

“Dave?” Tavros grabs his forearm gently. “Really, you need to shut up now.”

“Tav, I thought you were all up in this rights to life shit as well.”

“Firstly, I’m not, uhh, sure that’s a thing. Secondly, what we’re watching, is normal. It’s not common, uh, yes, but it’s normal. So shut up now please.”

After a moment Dave nods. Tavros’ hand slips down his arm and their fingers curl loosely around each other.

* * *

You tumble back over yourself until you’re on the ground again. Maybe that wasn’t the best idea. You could have hurt yourself. But you didn’t, and probably managed to look very adorable doing it, so you go along the tunnel without another thought about it.

Something moves down one of the side-tunnels and you hide from it until it has passed. When you’re next able to you turn left and are confronted by the smell of burning bodies. You don’t know how you recognise that smell, because it is surely something you have never come across before. In any case, you follow it.

Burning sticks are lying here and there on the ground. It’s darker here, and you can see glowing embers floating through the air. They settle on you and you occasionally shake them off. Soon there is enough soot to stick to your feet as you walk. It’s pretty uncomfortable.

A dark thing flashes near you. You growl at it, the sound deepening to a roar without any particular effort from you. It flashes further ahead. You don’t see it again after that.

You’d like to hum to yourself as you walk but you don’t know any songs. Of course you don’t know any songs. You’re not sure that trolls even have songs, or what songs are for that matter. It seems to be a word that’s just popped into your head and pretended to mean something. Like ‘sprink’ or ‘rame’ or ‘cookalizer’. These are very silly words that aren’t really words because they don’t mean anything at all. In fact, you think ‘hum’ must be one of these words, because you don’t know how you would do it in the first place. You are a wiggler.

Instead of doing whatever that is or isn’t, you try making different sounds. You can chirrup, click, growl and roar. You can rumble too, when you are happy or frightening others into submission. There must be other sounds you can make, and you can’t wait to find out what they are.

You turn a corner and find a fire with the bodies of wigglers burning in it. You become angry for the first time in your short life. It is one thing to be defeated and culled by something stronger than you. It is quite another to be killed by something you can’t beat. How could you possibly beat fire? Unless you had some sort of windy thing, there was no way. What sort of horrible, mean monster would do something like this?

It comes up behind you, making you even angrier. It is already bigger than you, why does it think it has to fight with tricks like this? You roar at it, as loud as you possibly can.

As it turns out that is very loud.

The walls almost shake with the sound of it. You don’t care. You are very, very angry.

The monster is a huge furry thing with four legs and a long tail, with stripes along it and horns coming out of its head. It stares at you with big, yellow eyes. You don’t care what colour its eyes are. You head it off, moving forward so it takes a step back, until you lead it into the fire. As its fur burns it yelps and fights blindly with you. You bite into the tendons of its leg, hopefully wounding it forever. You’re hardly big enough to keep it in the fire where it deserves to be.

The beast cries out and dances around you. You rush for its other leg, tearing the muscles there with your short but powerful teeth. It doesn’t seem enough. You manage to latch onto its tail, and quickly work to sever it. By the end of a fairly one-sided fight, the monster has run off clumsily, leaving you there with its tail in your teeth and a satisfied feeling of justice.

* * *

Kanaya glances at Terezi and laughs softly. “He might want to be a legislacerator when he comes of age. Just like you.”

“Oh, no. We don’t need another troll obsessed with apprehending criminals and hanging their plush toys,” Karkat moans.

Terezi smiles, all crooked rows of spiked teeth. “It’s a shame about his blood.”

* * *

Your blood races through you. For the first time in your life, you really feel alive. Doing the right thing, you decide, is very nice. You should always try to help people who are less fortunate than you. And if they are dead, it is only right to avenge them.

For a minute you’re not sure what to do with the tail you’ve taken. It would be a good prize to take up to the surface and show whoever you will be meeting up there. You try to wrap it around yourself, but without fingers that’s hard to do – not that you know what fingers are.

You are a wiggler.

In the end you just catch it in a few of your teeth and prepare to drop it whenever you’re forced to strife. You walk through the caverns like this and notice that any wigglers you encounter avoid you. You’re not sure if this is because you are covered in blood and carrying a tail or if none of these wigglers want to make friends with you. The thought is upsetting.

Eventually one of them comes up and jumps at you. Surprised, you roll over and out of its way. Scowling, it gets up and jumps again. You realise it is trying to take your tail. You wonder why it didn’t just ask for it.

It clicks angrily at you, a little yellow thing that keeps jumping around instead of running. There’s probably some strategic benefit to that, but you just think it looks silly. You chirp at it, trying to convey your amusement. It jumps right up and lands on you where you have rolled. It’s clever enough to have worked out where you would go. You chirp at it and it clicks back as it tries to take the tail from you. What results is a game of tug-and-war, strong enough for the wiggler to slide off you so you’re basically rolling around in the ground together.

It’s fun, right up until it bites you, getting its teeth between your segments. When it draws back to click at you some more, you see your blood on its mouth. Anger rises up in you and you unquestioningly let it. It’s a natural and obvious thing. You can’t be or appear weak to anyone, not even this fun troll that you were enjoying playing with a moment ago.

You growl at it lowly and it pulls its head back, startled. Then it clicks at you defiantly. You lunge at it until it is underneath you, baring your teeth but not using them until you are absolutely sure they will make contact with a sensitive part of the offending wiggler. You will force it into submission, the way you did that other one you met. Yes, that’s how it should be. 

At the right moment you press your teeth into the soft part of its neck, but freeze when you feel the wiggler making similar contact. You pull away, surprised. The other clamps down more tightly. Furious, you writhe in an effort to shake it off, rumbling deeply and unevenly. It chirrups into your skin and the sound is so obnoxious in this moment that you roar at it. It knocks you with its head, apparently telling you to shut up, because a few seconds later a monster is charging at the two of you.

Pissed off and somehow in a really different way than you were about the fire injustice, you dive in under the monster and tear into its softer belly. The blood that comes out makes you feel better, though you immediately feel badly for killing the creature in what will be a slow and painful way. Out of kindness, you squeeze out from under it and go up to the head, ready to kill it mercifully. You find the yellow wiggler already there, the deed already done.

As you watch it clicks reproachfully at you and runs off with your tail.

What a dick.

Because the wiggler has left you behind and you’re angry, because it hurt you and took your tail and embarrassed you and that is so not how it should be, you press your horn to the side of the monster’s lifeless body. It doesn’t hurt, so you press it in until it breaks the skin, then shift so that your horn is dragging open the flesh. You growl quietly, telling yourself that you are a good fighter and it was your prize. Even if that stupid yellow took it, it didn’t really earn it. It didn’t exact vengeance on behalf of many of their dead egg-siblings. It is just a thief, and you feel badly for whoever has to deal with it on the surface.

But you blink away these feelings and go down the tunnel, heading the opposite way to the yellow. You should probably stop calling it that, you think. But you’re not sure why, so you keep doing it anyway. It’s not as if you’re old enough to talk. Just click and roar and stuff.

It feels like hours before you near the surface. You’re young and tire quickly, and every monster you beat gets that bit closer to killing you. Soon you find that you’re being followed by wigglers who have realised that you will clear the way for them. You give them a stern clicking-to, but otherwise leave them be. They’re weaker but that doesn’t mean they don’t deserve to live.

When you get to the opening which leads up some of them push you aside. But others go to you and nudge at you until you’re upright, chirruping or rumbling at you to get you moving again. You’re grateful to them. Wigglers of all different colours, coming to help you after you had helped them. This is the true meaning of friendleadership. Whatever that is.

Violet takes one of your legs in its teeth and tugs, growling occasionally when it thinks you’re not moving fast enough. Dark red chirrups and nudges, curling around you for a short time when you fall in a grub-hug. Teal is smaller than you and tries to climb on you whenever it can, not listening when you click for it to stop, only when you growl at it. Brown follows behind you all. Its blood tastes good and when you have to stop because your wounds are hurting it comes close and lets you lick it, making an odd noise that isn’t quite rumbling and you think must be of submission. It hardly matters because you will all go your separate ways. But for now, you are grateful to have made friends in the depths of hell, who have worked together to leave it and go somewhere better.

This world isn’t as scary as you thought it would be. Which is a strange thing to think, because you’ve hardly been to any other world. To your young wiggler mind the fact that other worlds could exist is entirely impossible. There is surely only the caverns and the surface and that is absolutely it.

When you all make it out to the surface, the fresh air feels wonderful. Brown shivers but it isn’t cold here so you don’t think it should be complaining. You’re in a field with all the other wigglers, moving forward towards something you only instinctively know is good. Violet runs ahead but that’s okay. As you scurry together dark red is hissed at by another wiggler, who you promptly roar at. The others spread out around you, giving you plenty of room, and dark red clicks at you in thanks.

Eventually dark red also goes ahead, sure that teal and brown will take care of you if care is needed. Teal takes its place and begins a constant, quiet stream of chirruping and clicking. It is an excitable wiggler, very affectionate, and you’re happy when a white, winged creature swoops down and carries it carefully off. You would wave except you still don’t have hands, and also you are injured.

Brown nuzzles you in a daring show of affection before hurrying off to the woods. There are different types of lusii there, and if it feels drawn to it then of course it should go. You, you feel quite all right here. You’ve bled quite a bit and killed quite a few things and now all you really want to do is curl up and maybe die, or be adopted, you don’t mind too much at this moment which one.

The wigglers close in on you again and you growl, telling them that though you’re tired and bleeding you’re definitely not weak. When you’re satisfied you’ve made your point you allow them to come in closer. There’re a lot of wigglers around, you can’t just be taking up all the space. Not all of it.

You half-sleep for a time, as wigglers leave with lusii and the field clears. Something moves slowly around you and you open one eye, roar as loudly as you can at it, and close it again. It moves close enough that a shadow is cast over you. There’s the sound of a bubble popping near your face.

You open your eyes, then widen them, looking up at the most amazing creature you have ever seen, of the five or so you’ve actually seen in the few hours you’ve been alive. It’s covered in white scales so small you can hardly make them out. Its eyes are large and round and friendly as it looks at you. There are spikes out from the side of its face, but it pushes them back like it doesn’t want to frighten you. Its body is long and it has four oddly bent legs, with spikes on the edges and webbed fingers. It has a truly magnificent tail. You think it could inspire terror in the most herpetophobic of wigglers.

It blows a bubble out from its mouth. You chirrup happily when it pops.

You try and fail to climb up onto its head, so it bows down and lets you use its spikes to grip on. When it’s clear you won’t fall off, it carries you off the field, and you feel satisfied and safe, even though you’re still injured and lusii probably aren’t very good at medicine.

* * *

“So John is a blue blood,” Rose muses.

“What, you mean he’s grub royalty?”

“You could say that, yes. From what Kanaya has told me, he’s quite high up on the troll hemospectrum.”

“He is an indigo blood, to be precise. His is the fourth-highest blood rank of all, and second-highest among the land-dwellers,” Kanaya tells them. “To put it into perspective – Gamzee is a purple blood, the highest among land-dwellers. He is the highest on the hemospectrum of the trolls present. John is one rank below him. They would be referred to as ‘highbloods’ and afforded respect from all but the sea-dwellers, who are the highest on the spectrum and not obliged to give it. Terezi is a teal blood and two ranks below John. The rest of us are below her. So yes, he is what you would call nobility.”

“Johnbro would be motherfucking with me. We woulda lived near each other and been the best of bros. Except for Karkat, who is the best of the motherfucking best, even if he’s some kind of mutant. It’s chill, bro. I love you.”

“Gamzee get the fuck off me. This isn’t the time for hugs.”

“You have a time for hugs?” Dave smirks.

“We’re in a relationship, we could have a time for fucking pancakes and it still wouldn’t be any of your business, fuckass.”

“I don’t know what trolls do with pancakes but that doesn’t sound healthy.”

“Fuck off, Strider!”

“I would but I’ve got to keep an eye on my human-turned-troll friend who is just now presenting a beautiful example of how fucked up you guys are, that a guy who even by human standards was nice, too nice you might say, can become a violent blood-drinking troll-baby after a casual species-swap. I’ve got to man my post here and watch out for some more unnecessary corpse mutilation, so I can add to my list of reasons why not to die around any of you. I’m remembering Aradia’s corpse party funeral here, by the way.”

“You’re a bitch.”

“I’m bitchin’,” Dave says with a completely straight face, in the way of perfected questionable irony.

Terezi laughs and they give each other a surreptitious hi-five behind Tavros’ wheelchair.

“What was that in the cave, anyway?”

“What, the blatant blackrom courtship? Oh, that’s right, you don’t pay attention to any of the talks I have repeatedly given you about this very subject. Silly me. I’ll just proceed to do it all fucking over again, is that all right with everyone present?”

Karkat is interrupted by Dave before he can really get going. “So what, your babies can hook up with each other? That’s sick, man. Almost as sick as some of that rainbow-coloured slaughter I just saw a bunch of alien infants get up to, which I find out your people willingly put them through. It’s just revelations, seriously some biblical shit up in here. Daniel in the fucking lions’ den, except Daniel’s got horns and decides to kill all of these weird bat-tiger-snake monsters before they can cut him open and throw him into a fire or some shit. Because, you know, the fire’s a whole different chapter of the book. This is not light reading, little gradeschoolers sitting at home with their white dudes and learning their troll ABCs. This is full on sixty-plus chapters of death and man-barbeques and sacrifices and rude kings and throwing helpless prisoners into the dens of wild and hungry animals.”

“I have no idea what kind of ignorant bullshit you were just spouting, but it doesn’t even matter because it was ignorant and, you guessed it, another fucking gold star for the coolkid Dave Strider, bullshit. Our grubs don’t ‘hook up with each other’, you crass bulgelicker. What even the fuck is that, and does it involve actual hooks? These are the questions a genuinely curious person might ask, one who was not completely aware of your painful stupidity and lack of cultural knowledge, despite having lived here for two years with us. You don’t know shit. It’s kind of pathetic.” 

Karkat takes a deep breath. “We can begin a courtship at any age. It doesn’t mean we have intercourse with each other. It also doesn’t mean anything permanent. It’s incredibly unlikely – no, I’ll say that it’s impossible – for a childhood flirtation to continue into adulthood. In John’s case, he met someone he had immediate feelings of hate for, which were reciprocated. It’s unlikely that in the caverns you’ll have enough free time for that. It’s a distraction when you’re trying not to get viciously killed. They did, wow, congratulations to them. Two little grubs fresh out of their egg-sacs, falling in hate over the body of a monster they had just culled together. Brings a tear of pity to my eye. But on the surface, they will likely never meet each other again. They would likely never recognise each other if they did, and they would both have changed enough that their feelings wouldn’t be the same. ‘Whatever happens in the brooding caverns, stays in the brooding caverns’, as the saying goes.”

Dave just looks at him for a minute, considering. “Yeah, okay,” he says finally. “Rez, do you have some of that pizza we alchemised last week? I’m getting hungry and don’t want to miss any of this John stuff.”

“What?” Karkat’s hands tighten into fists.

“Mm, two slices. You have one and I’ll share the other with Tavros.”

“What?” Karkat says again.

“Or I could share with Tavros. You know, I’m not that hungry and I still remember too vividly what happened last time you two tried to share food. It’s burned into my brain. Really not in a sexy way.”

Terezi giggles and takes the pizza from out of her modus.

“Hold up, I’ve got a cookalizer in here somewhere. It’s ironic as hell to eat this shit cold, but I don’t want you guys missing out on some melted cheese goodness right after the tragic displacement of a mutually decent friend in time, space and species. That shit is not cash.” Dave set it on the ground and sat down cross-legged next to it with Terezi. “Karkat, man, chill out. Now is not the time for interspecies makeouts, if that’s what getting your panties all knotted up.”

“Why aren’t you being a culturally insensitive assgaper? What the fuck? Was my explanation too considerate or something? Because being generous to you is really not what I am going for.”

“I’m not jumping down your throat because we’re not kismesses, Kar. We’re pretty damn far from that. All the way over in friendship land, just past the border. I get what you were saying. So stop getting angry at me inappropriately and pay more attention to your now baby troll boyfriend.”

“ _He’s not my-_ ”

“Yeah, dude, don’t really care. He was as good as. Just saying, you should have made a move on that like a year ago. Get back to your voyeuristic paedophilia, I’m goin’ to sit here with the people whose pants I might actually end up getting into, like a real boy with real expectations. The biggest divide for me is the cultural divide and about ten inches. You enjoy your tragic mess of a love life without me, I got some pizza cheese to unironically melt. Might get back to that daytime TV later, if there’s nothing better on.”

Karkat is blushing furiously. So is Tavros, who is sitting pretty close to Dave. Terezi just licks the pizza grease from her fingers as she waits for the cookalizer to finish heating.

Kanaya and Rose are still watching the screen, speaking quietly to each other about what’s going on. “He has constructed his hive where it would be expected from one of his blood rank.”

“That close to the ocean? He’s nearly on the beach. I thought that area was reserved for purple blooded trolls?”

“Nah, he’d be with me. Real close, like the sea-dwellers were before they up and got dead. You got to stick with your own kind. That’s what they motherfucking said. 'Cause the lowbloods, they don’t understand. They don’t feel the same. Different motherfucking lives. Short but they have these big hearts up and in themselves, it’s easy for them to just follow what they been feeling and make all these miracles and shit. Highbloods can talk about blood and killing and such. I wasn’t ever comfortable with that shit. Now I understand it better.”

“What Gamzee is saying in his own insightful way, is that the highbloods on the hemospectrum have more violent tendencies. If you had ever met Eridan you would have seen it. John is exhibiting the behaviours expected from one of his status – even encouraged. Highbloods live the longest, after all, and they were to be responsible for the furthering of our empire.”

“So he can settle there without infringing on the territory designated for purple blooded trolls?”

“A troll can settle wherever they want. It is a choice made by feeling. The lusus and troll together decide on the best place for them to build a hive, where they will live together until the troll reaches maturity.”

“Ah, yes. That makes sense. Thank you, Kanaya.” Rose smiles at her.

“You’re welcome, Rose.”

“Do you...do any of you regret the choices you make as wigglers, which you have to live with for so long?”

Kanaya thinks about that for a moment and says, finally and seriously, “I would be surprised if there was a troll who didn’t.”

* * *

From where you sit on your lusus’ shoulder, you watch the drones finish the construction of your hive. You and your lusus had quickly learned to communicate with each other, though neither of you can really speak. He pops bubbles at you and they mean different things. You click and chirp at him and both of you can smile.

You smile at each other now as the roof is set down on a tower. The hive is a moderately sized misshapen sort of thing but you like it. There’s a big square in the middle with two floors and lots of rooms. The roof is a triangle, which is really not practical at all but familiar in a way you can’t place. Your lusus, who you have taken to calling Salamandad, had insisted on having things jutting out of the hive in weird places. Going along with it, the hive has balconies and open walls and a tower on either side, roughly the same size and shape. There is a walkway leading on to one but the other will be a special place for Salamandad. It’s a good home you’ve built here and you’re proud of it.

This is as good a time as any to ask for some much-needed medical attention.

Salamandad’s first action is to take you over to the ocean and stick you under. As grateful as you are, some warning would have been appreciated. The salt stings your wounds, but you trust your lusus and let him do whatever he can for you. If that means oceanic dousings, then that’s just the sort of home the two of you will share.

You wiggle and curl around his arm. He understands that you’ve had enough of the ocean for now and takes you into the forest. You sit with him and he shows you how to strip bark from trees, then strip the tough, outer case from it. What’s left is a fine, transparent film. It’s soft when he wraps it loosely around you body. You chirrup because it’s nice to be wrapped up by your Salamandad. He is very careful with you and you like the attention after the trials of the caverns.

He stops, glubs at you and goes a few steps over to a plant. You don’t cry because you are tough and just killed lots of things and don’t want whatever dangerous things are in the forest to know that you are here. But you wiggle excessively until he notices and comes back. Salamandad shows you the plant, which has brightly coloured berries on it. You reach out to them but he picks one for you, putting it into one of your little hands. You consider it, making soft sounds until you decide to put it in your mouth.

A bubble pops fiercely and he stops you with his webbed fingers. He makes a sort of jilting snapping noise in the back of his throat. You can’t speak lizard but you think that you are getting lectured right now. You coo and pap his face to tell him you understand. He blows a small bubble on your head as a kind of kiss. You chirrup because you are very, very happy.

Salamandad crushes up the berries and puts the stuff on your wounds. He holds you upside down so he can see if there are any others on your body. You try to giggle but chirrup instead because of course that is what you do. We’ve covered that plenty of times already. Can you just get it through your think pan that you are a wiggler? There is no way you are or have previously been anything else. If Salamandad knew the sort of nonsense that you’re thinking he would surely blow a bubble of stern reproach.

When the berry mix is applied he curls up around you on the ground and wraps you up in the clean bark. At first you think it is too tight, but then you realise you are tired and will probably fall unconscious very soon and won’t need to move about anyway. The first time your Salamandad takes you into your hive, you are fast asleep on his shoulder.


	3. Active

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Editing is hell.

Enter name.

Your name is JONTHA EGBERT. You agree, that is a stupid-sounding name. You much prefer to be called JOHN, which is what all your friends call you, when they are not too busy trying to treat you like the highblood that you are.

You live near the Alternian seaside with your loving lusus, SALAMANDAD, who has nurtured you only somewhat irresponsibly these last SIX SWEEPS. Together you often go SWIMMING in the painful, unforgiving saltiness of the ocean. Not that you have any other body of water to compare it to. Throughout your life, you have often suspected you are not who you have been born to be. But after one too many LECTURES from your fairly observant and stern caregiver, you keep these thoughts to yourself.

You like the comforting feeling of the WIND that blows directly over your hive, and you spend an inordinate amount of time on the roof, just enjoying it with your various sensory functions. You occasionally wish that you could fly, but do not want any more attention than you already have. You have NO CAREER OR POLITICAL ASPIRATIONS which dismays everyone who has ever met you. You like to think you would be a vegetarian, did you not have the blood of a RUTHLESS AND VIOLENT ANIMAL-MURDERER. That said, you are exceptionally proud of yourself for never having killed another troll. Your accomplishments in suppressing the hand you have been dealt in life are surpassed only by the purple blood who lives some way down the beach, MAKARA. You admire him deeply and wish you could learn his secrets, but are too ashamed of your own murderousness to even talk to him.

Your trolltag is atlasAppleby, after a character in one of those TERRIBLE MOVIES that you love. It surely has NO IMPORTANCE beyond telling us about another of your interests. You speak in what you think is a pretty normal way.

What will you do?

> John: Quickly retrieve arms from drawer.

That’s a pretty stupid thing to do. You only keep your WEAPONS OF VARIOUS SIZES in there. As far as you’re concerned, arms don’t count as weapons, unless they are attached to your INCREDIBLY VIOLENT and ENDLESSLY BLOODTHIRSTY BODY.

Phew. You felt it get away from you for a moment there.

> John: Remove cake from magic chest.

You don’t have a MAGIC CHEST because magic doesn’t exist. You do, however, have a WEAPONS CHEST, where you store all of your MURDEROUS and COMPLETELY BRUTAL weaponry that doesn’t fit in your drawer.

> John: Quickly retrieve arms from magic chest.

Okay, this is getting out of hand. Whoever it is telling you to do these things is utterly ridiculous and if they were close to you right now you would surely ROAR WITH THE FEROCITY OF A THOUSAND GENERATIONS OF UNAPOLOGETIC BLOODSHED at them.

> John: Examine contents of chest.

That’s more like it.

Your WEAPONS CHEST contains all sorts of helpful tools that you might need to one day KILL THOSE WHO HAVE WRONGED YOU and maybe even KILL THOSE WHO HAVEN’T. Sometimes when you are in a particularly violent mood you take out your SICKLES and THROW THEM AT THE WALL WITH DISTASTE. They are RUBBISH WEAPONS and you LOOK DOWN IMMEDIATELY on any troll who would bother to waste their time with them. On those days you then take out your FAVOURITE WEAPON, a large and OBNOXIOUSLY COLOURED WARHAMMER, wielded once by your forefather, TROLL GEORGE WASHINGTON.

It is an old story that when he was not yet four sweeps old, Troll George Washington decimated the tree behind his hive with this very warhammer. His lusus loved that tree and cried at the sight of it destroyed by overzealous hammering. Rather than admitting to having done the thing, even in the excusable heat of his youth, Troll George Washington put the blame on the rust blood that lived in their lawnring. In the night the rust blood was killed, further enforcing the hemoism inherent in their biology as high-blooded trolls.

You learned from that fable the immense power your blood colour affords you, not to take advantage of it while in possession of your conscience, and not to kill trees needlessly. You would never, ever want to hurt your awesome Salamandad.

> John: Read note on drawer.

There isn’t any note on your drawer. There is, however, a ROTTING FISH CARCASS that your Salamandad brought you as a gift. He left it out in the sun for days before giving it to you, just the way you like it.

> John: Take poster.

There aren’t any posters, just WALL PAINTINGS that you and Salamandad have covered the hive in. They are beautiful, colourful and make absolutely no sense.

Look, here. What could that be? Some sort of red circle, with a black circle in front of it, then a white line? You don’t know what you were thinking.

> John: Examine wall paintings.

Over there you drew a very bad, a really, especially terrible drawing of a young male troll, wearing a sweater and looking unhappy.

When you were in one of your moods you painted a big red heart around his head. You like to tell yourself it is entirely ironic, though you’re not sure why that is a thing you would want to be.

Then there’s the checkerboard pattern you did on one part of the wall, and the five big circles near it. What a silly thing to have done. You can call anything art these days, even if it’s worthless and means absolutely nothing at all. 

But they comfort you, like the big swirly lines you’ve done everywhere. It’s like you can control the wind, even though really you’re just painting it. Your friends say that you have an overactive imagination.

When you don’t want to kill things, sometimes you think about that and wonder if they’re right.

> John: Open message.

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

TC: gu3SS what  
TC: S3riouSly, gu3SS  
TC: youll n3v3r gu3SS  
TC: but try anyway  
TC: pl3aS3???  
AA: oh hey trip!  
AA: what am i guessing? sorry, i don’t know.  
TC: no  
TC: you ar3 not Still typing lik3 that  
TC: you w3irdo!!!  
AA: like what? this is fine.  
TC: juSt g3t a quirk lik3 th3 r3St of uS!!!  
TC: itS not that hard and it S3tS you apart  
TC: itS Sp3cial  
AA: no offense trip but they’re kind of really hard to read, not to mention hard to type.  
AA: i just don’t see why it’s such a big deal.  
TC: b3cauS3 itS Sp3cial!!!  
AA: ...  
AA: yeah? i’m sorry trip i just don’t get it.  
TC: thatS ok, w3 alwayS kn3w you w3r3 Sup3r w3ird  
TC: windy kid ;)  
AA: i haven’t heard that nickname in sweeps.  
TC: oh, w3 Still uS3 it  
AA: what??  
TC: it Stopp3d both3ring you, So w3 uS3 it wh3n you ar3nt around  
TC: itS Still fun that way  
AA: no way!  
TC: y3S way  
TC: now Shut your pr3tty mouth and GU3SS!!!  
AA: what am i guessing though?  
TC: oh you are So hop3l3SS  
TC: So, So, path3tically hop3l3SS  
AA: trip, we’ve talked about this.  
TC: y3ah, dont Start that whol3 Sp33ch again  
TC: ‘‘‘you cant pity m3 b3cauS3 i alr3ady hav3 a mat3Sprit’’’  
TC: n3wSflaSh, thatS not how pity workS  
AA: i’m really sorry about that.  
TC: b3Sid3S, iv3 n3v3r S33n this ‘‘‘mat3Sprit’’’  
TC: and dont Say that 3ith3r, you mak3 m3 pity you mor3  
TC: b3cauS3 your3 So daaamn uS3l3SS  
AA: heh, i guess you’re right.  
AA: um. am i guessing something about you?  
TC: ding ding ding!!!  
AA: is it something to do with quadrants?  
TC: DING DING DING!!!  
AA: oh trip seriously i am so happy for you.  
AA: damn.  
AA: i’m tearing up a little bit here.  
TC: fuck you ar3 th3 moSt uS3l3SS Sack of Shit  
TC: i n3v3r kn3w th3r3 could b3 a troll aS Shitty at b3ing a troll aS you  
TC: just fucking f33lingS all th3 tim3  
TC: w3r3 not 3v3n conciliatory  
TC: you w3ird fuck  
AA: is that why you’re telling me first? :)  
TC: how did you know???  
AA: hehehe  
TC: your3 a baStard  
TC: you hid3 it So damn w3ll  
TC: if i w3r3nt So fluSh3d for you you know w3 would b3 in the b3St moirall3gianc3 right now  
TC: Scr3w dulciS and h3r wat3r boy, w3 would b3 all fucking ov3r that quadrant  
TC: pal3r than th3 Skin of a luSuS  
TC: we would ShooSh and pap lik3 th3y did only in dayS of old  
TC: f33lingS jam all ov3r th3 pil3S  
TC: juSt cry our own w3ight in t3arS 3v3ry day  
AA: i don’t think that’s healthy.  
TC: fuck you  
TC: w3 would do it anyway  
TC: and it would b3 b3autiful :)  
AA: that does sound nice.  
AA: shame i’m so damn pitiful, isn’t it?  
TC: no on3 Should know that about th3mS3lv3S  
TC: iv3 ruin3d you  
AA: haha, no, my matesprit’s done that already.  
TC: dammit  
TC: h3 muSt b3 one pitiabl3 moth3rfuck3r if your3 So loyal to him  
AA: yeah...  
TC: but back onto my Shit  
TC: john, Shut the fuck up, thiS iS important  
AA: i’m listening attentively!  
TC: i found a Spad3mat3!!!  
TC: and by th3 cond3Sc3, Sh3 iS Such a bitch  
TC: itS incr3dibl3 how much i hat3 h3r  
TC: :)  
AA: that’s great!  
AA: really trip, i’m so happy for you.  
TC: y3ah, not lik3 it matt3rS y3t  
TC: but itS good knowing that wh3n th3 tim3 com3S ill b3 r3ady for it, you know???  
AA: yeah i know.  
TC: you must f33l good too, having a quadrant cl3ar3d  
TC: if you 3v3r fit into on3 of min3, l3t m3 know ok???  
AA: yeah trip.  
AA: of course! let me know if your feelings ever change. :)  
TC: you b3t i will  
TC: your3 a bab3. lik3, phySically and m3ntally  
TC: on3 thing though  
TC: i thought you w3r3 quitting it with th3 nicknam3S  
AA: oh, sorry!  
AA: four letter names just sit better with me.  
TC: y3ah ok bab3  
AA: that’s not a thing you can call me now. not while you still want to fill pails with me.  
TC: oh my cond3Sc3 you ar3 So craSS Som3tim3S  
TC: itS lik3 you dont 3v3n r3aliS3 what your3 Saying  
TC: you probably dont  
TC: what a path3tic, Supportiv3 bab3  
TC: ill S33 you lat3r  
AA: i hope so. it’s been too long since we strifed.  
TC: g3tting t3nS3???  
AA: hoofbeasts aren’t much of a challenge. :(  
TC: poor wiggl3r  
TC: ill come round Som3tim3 Soon  
TC: aS long aS your3 luSuS do3Snt try to f33d m3 thiS tim3  
AA: i’d like that.  
AA: see you trip.  
TC: x x x

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] ceased trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

* * *

Karkat sits with his tired eyes too close to the screen. Terezi taps him on the shoulder with her cane, but he’s too exhausted even to startle. “Shit, Terezi, just go away.”

“You’ve been here a while, Karkat.”

He just makes a noncommittal noise.

“All the evidence points to you having been here too long. The bags under your eyes, more pronounced than they were merely yesterday. I would propose that they have been made darker by the shadows cast on them by the dim light of the screen-”

“Terezi, seriously-”

“Then there is the sad fact that you have not only gone without food this entire day, but haven’t asked any of us, your friends, to bring some to you. From this I draw the entirely reasonable conclusion that you have not eaten!”

“Come on-”

Terezi taps her cane loudly on the ground. Once, twice. That is the cold, metallic sound of the law. “Karkat, I deem you to be a detriment to your own personal health, and the health of the leader must be maintained at all costs! What would the rest of us do without you? In a true democracy, we would vote. But without you there is no logical candidate. Therefore!” She pauses for dramatic effect before leaning in and whispering to Karkat. “If I can’t persuade you to eat and go to your respiteblock and sleep, we will drag you out while you embarrass yourself by shouting a lot and really, needing an intervention in the first place.”

Karkat blinks at her owlishly. He has been staring at the laptop for too long, skipping ahead only when he is absolutely sure he has learned everything he can about Troll John for that day. He is up to when John was six sweeps, the age when he and Karkat met each other. Troll John has made a boring group of friends and they spend a lot of time talking as Karkat struggles to figure out what they’re talking about.

“Hmm,” is all Terezi says before suddenly snapping her fingers, causing the doors to fling open.

“Sorry Karkat,” Rose tells him before grabbing his arm. “I’m going to need my laptop back.”

“KK, don’t fight it. You have to retht. John ith’nt going anywhere.” Sollux grabs his other arm.

Terezi supports his back as Dave holds onto his legs.

“What the-” Karkat says finally, but Terezi clamps a hand over his mouth.

“I warned you bro,” she tells him and she and Dave giggle at each other.

“We’ll install the client on your husktop. As long as you sleep and eat, take breaks occasionally, I promise we won’t interfere.”

Dave, as usual, talks too much. “This is what Romeo and Juliet would have gone through if they had cool friends and not just ones that wound up killing each other. This is fucking literary shit. Rose, you have to write this down later.”

And so Karkat is carried out of the broken machine room and promptly discarded in a pile of DVDS, wires and some of Terezi’s pyralspites. The door to his respiteblock is locked and everyone agrees not to let him out until he’s been quiet for at least five hours.

Without John around, this is their true meaning of friendleadership.

* * *

Downstairs, a lusus is clicking its pincers and bashing into things the way it does whenever it is awake. Its young charge has never been sure if it wants something from him or is just perpetually in a bad mood. He hits the keys of his husktop viciously as he talks to his hacker friend, who is about to send him a virus which is very important to the plot.

As soon as he receives the file the troll realises that this is a dream. Fuck, he must have fallen asleep after his misguided friends threw him into a pile in his respiteblock on the meteor. He doesn’t like that they have successfully manipulated him like this. But whatever, time to explore the damn bubbles.

Lines of his friend’s yellow font fill up the screen, asking him all sorts of meaningful questions that he wouldn’t bother with even if he didn’t have something better to do. The troll unplugs the device, then throws it at the wall of his dream respiteblock. It feels good being able to destroy things like this. His lusus clatters around at just the right moment to make him feel like an uncultured idiot.

The troll, whose name we know is Karkat, goes out from his dream bubble and searches through many others. “John!” he calls out in each one. But all he finds is Tavros with legs and fairy Aradia and some sea-dweller who tries to impale him on a pitchfork. He would have any number of things to say about that, but she is not John so for the moment she doesn’t matter. “John! John!”

And finally he finds a bubble that looks right. Weird white walls with stupid posters all over them, that human bed-slab-thing which just makes no sense and really can’t be comfortable, and cakes everywhere. So the troll goes into the bubble, more hopeful than he has been since John disappeared and maybe even longer than that if he’s honest (which he isn’t, so never mind), but as soon as he does it shifts and he’s in a hive. Half of the bubble is Earth, and half is Alternia, and what the fuck why is he over there making out with Troll John seriously what the shit.

So the troll watches with bewilderment as he (but not him) kisses John (but not the John he was looking for) until he realises what he’s doing right now and goes very, deeply red. Of course it is just at that moment that the other Karkat has to look at him and gog, this just got all kinds of supernatural freaky shit awkward and the troll does not want any part of this. He immediately regrets not staying back with his husktop and talking to the hacker about what the memory means to him and other stupid feelings crap. At least then he would only be talking about feelings, not actually having them. He’s kind of having a lot of feelings right now.

Karkat shoos at him and the troll is actually pretty annoyed that he would do that. He was about to leave, there’s no reason to ask him to. He’s not some kind of idiot that just stands there and watches his alternate self getting off with the matesprit of his life. Geez, how unnecessary. He wants to stay to prove a point, now. No one is sure what that point is or why he wants to prove it.

Troll John notices Karkat’s distraction and is about to turn around but Karkat stops him by looping one of his legs around the other’s hips and grinding and they gasp out together and okay, all right, he’ll go. It’s embarrassing watching his face get all red like that anyway. He never did like these dream bubbles.

So the troll hangs out with Aradia for a while until he wakes up, because he can’t find the pitchfork girl to yell at. It’s disconcertingly peaceful.

* * *

Enter name.

Your name is TRIPEL TERNIO. You are a BROWN BLOODED TROLL and perhaps the only one of your kind to hate the taste of your blood. You are careful to never get injured, though this will be harder now that you have found your own KISMESIS. This is a new development in your life, and you have only now stopped boasting about it to your dearest friend, a babe of a highblood called JOHN. If you weren’t so incredibly flushed for him, the two of you would be moirailing it up right now. As it happens he is just too stupidly attractive. He has a penchant for four-letter names and calls you TRIP, which you are secretly very pleased about.

You live UNDERGROUND with your waste of space of a lusus, a CRAWLER who went into a cocoon four sweeps ago and still hasn’t come out. You live off the land and occasionally the generosity of your friends while you wait for your lusus to mature. Your kismesis says that he is dead, but your kismesis is a massive bitch and you refuse to listen to her bullshit. You are sure when your lusus comes out he will be the best to make up for all those sweeps of LONELINESS AND ABANDONMENT. There is absolutely no arguing with your RESOLVE that this is the TRUTH.

You are a determined young lady and hope one day to become a DRONE SUPERVISOR, even though this is a position you just made up. You get a sort of sick pleasure from the idea of seeing other trolls’ pails and fully expect that no one will be able to fill one as completely as you, when the time comes. Your kismesis says you are NARCISSISTIC, but your kismesis is a despicable bulgemuncher who uses stupid long words. You really hate her quite a bit.

Your trolltag is triplicateCorruption and you Sp3ak with occaSional 3mphaSiS!!!

What will you do?

> Tripel: Examine room.

What’s a room?

> Tripel: Quickly retrieve arms from cinderblocks.

What are cinderblocks?

> Tripel: Get the damn beta and save your friend’s life!

You decide to TROLL your KISMESIS instead. You take out your old HUSKTOP from where you have hidden it in the CAVERN WALL. It is riddled with holes and you keep all of your possessions in them. Except for your weapons, which you of course keep in your drawer. You might live apart from society, but you are not uncivilised.

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] began trolling acapellaControvert [AC] \--

TC: im bor3d aS Shit oth3rwiS3 i wouldnt waSt3 my tim3 on you  
TC: i juSt got off th3 phon3 with john So w3r3 all fri3nd3d out at th3 mom3nt  
TC: aft3r hiS pl3aSantne3SS i f3lt lik3 i want3d to burn myS3lf on you  
AC: t r i P e l - y o u - a r e - t r y i n g - t o o - h a r d |  
TC: no way i am trying th3 p3rf3ct amount of hardn3SS  
AC: t h a t - l a s t - P a r t - w a s - g o o d - t h o u g h |  
AC: k e e P - w o r k i n g - a t - it |  
AC: y o u - w i l l - i m P r o v e - e v e n t u a l l y |  
TC: fuck you no  
TC: i am th3 b3St kiSm3SiS, your3 lucky i Saw Som3thing in you  
TC: no on3 3lS3 waS volunt33ring for your windybind bullShit  
AC: m u s i c - i s - t h e - m o s t - P r o f o u n d - l a n g u a g e - o n - t h i s - P l a n e t |  
AC: a l l - y o u - a r e - s a y i n g - t o - m e - b y - i n s u l t i n g - i t - i s - t h a t - y o u - a r e - u n c o u t h - a n d - i - o u g h t - n o t - a s s o c i a t e - w i t h - y o u |  
TC: you know i liv3 in a cav3  
TC: y3t your3 Still talking to m3  
TC: all that SayS to m3 is that your g3nt33ln3SS iS bS  
AC: y o u - g e t - m e - s o - w o r k e d - u P |  
AC: i - a m - s h a k i n g - w i t h - r a g e - h e r e |  
TC: ;)  
AC: w h y - d i d - y o u - h a v e - t o - b r i n g - u P - y o u r - a r r o g a n t - h i g h b l o o d - f r i e n d - r i g h t - a t - t h e - s t a r t - o f - t h i s - c o n v e r s a t i o n |  
TC: h3S not arrogant  
AC: o h - d a m n - y o u |  
TC: h3S humbl3 aS Shit  
AC: t r i P e l |  
TC: h3 d3S3rv3S hiS StatuS, 3v3n if h3 conStantly forg3tS that h3 haS it  
AC: h o w - c a n - h e - e v e n - d o - t h a t |  
AC: a r e - y o u - l y i n g - t o - m e |  
TC: im not going to li3 wh3n i can wr3ck you with th3 truth  
AC: a - r - g - h |  
TC: <3-  
AC: <3-

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] ceased trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

> Tripel: Examine contents of drawer.

You have only two weapons in your WEAPONS DRAWER. This is not because you are POOR and can't afford new ones, but in fact because you are LETHALLY CAPABLE with them. There is no need for more weapons of varying sizes when you are so AMAZINGLY DEADLY with just your CARAMACE and HYPOTHETICAL SWEEPS OF COMBAT EXPERIENCE.

The caramace was crafted diligently by you from the shed skin of your lusus, before he went into his cocoon and you never saw him again. It is tougher than the hide of a hoofbeast and spikier than the thorns of a WATERFIRE PLANT. This is because you covered the weapon in the thorns of a waterfire plant, snapped many of them dangerously in half, and coated the entire thing in POISON just to be totally safe. If you had to, you could throw the caramace at an enemy and they would probably die before they even got close to you.

Every day is a good day for safety.

> Tripel: Lick the caramace.

You lick the spiky handcrafted weapon, careful not to cut open your tongue. The poison tastes delicious. It’s a shame it manages to kill everybody besides you, because you want to share this wonderful taste with all of your friends. John in particular you think would really like it.

Like many lowbloods, you are a POWERFUL PSIONIC. In your case, your abilities grant you ABSOLUTE IMMUNITY to any kind of dangerous shit you might encounter. You are still able to bleed, though. You fucking hate that.

That’s why you and your lusus live underground. Your inborn ability to TOTALLY AND IMMEDIATELY REVERSE THE EFFECTS OF DANGEROUS SHIT is highly prized. If the Condesce found out about you, you would surely be placed under mind-control for the rest of what you think is going to be a really fucking long life. You are already FIFTEEN SWEEPS OLD and have not reached maturity.

Not even your kismesis knows this about you. You want to tell her, but she would almost certainly complain about it for the next few centuries.

> Tripel: Wake up lusus.

There’s no way you can do that. You’re not sure why he’s been sleeping for so long, but he must have a really good reason. He wouldn’t leave you here alone unless he did.

You touch the cocoon in the middle of your cavern gently. When the fires are bright enough you can see the shape of him inside it. He was a big crawler and you hope when he comes out he will be able to hug you the way he did when you were a wiggler. His shape is changing during pupation, but you hope not too much. You also hope that he will recognise you. He was never all that smart.

> Tripel: Cry deeply.

Fuck no. What are you, six sweeps old?

* * *

It’s a beautiful night in Alternia so you and Salamandad have gone down to the beach. He’s playing with the tide, jumping back whenever it pulls close and nosing it every now and then. You’re happy that Salamandad is the kind of lizard that likes water. Sometimes you go and visit the sea-dwellers together. It’s great because he has gills and you’re really, really good at holding your breath.

You know you’re a lucky troll. Trip’s lusus has been in a cocoon for sweeps. Dull and her lusus get along well, but she’s unhappy about her blood colour. Even though you don’t like being a highblood you think it must be a lot better to complain about having things than to complain about not having anything. That strikes you as very wise. You tear up a little bit from the profundity of it.

Salamandad tries to cheer you up in his usual way; by knocking you onto the ground and trying to claw at your neck. You strife for a few minutes. He’s careful not to draw blood, so by the end of it all you have are red and white lines across your skin. Neither of you wants to trigger your blood rage. He’s scratched in a couple of places and twists up, falling over himself to lick at them. In what is to both of you a beautiful reminder of the beginning of your time together, you pick him up and dunk him in the ocean.

Further along the beach you can see Makara and his lusus. Its huge white head rests in the troll’s lap as he pats it. He’s lucky too, you think. Luckier, even, because he doesn’t struggle with homicidal urges.

Salamandad angers a scuttlebeast and you make quick work of it. Out of politeness, you wait until you are back in your hive before biting into its red-blooded flesh.

* * *

“So what are we dealing with here.” Dave moves over to give Sollux a better view of the screen.

“Well, John wouldn’t be John if he didn’t have plenty of friends,” Rose says a bit wryly. “Unfortunately his blood colour prevents him from socialising normally. In a comparable way to human royalty - he has many friends, but only three, I would say, close ones. It’s interesting really the parallels we can draw between his life there and the one he shared with us-”

“Three, so there’s the cave chick and the fish killer-”

Jade shudders. “Can we not call him that? Is that okay?”

“So yeah, those guys. And the third one is-”

“The ‘cave chick’s kismesis.” Rose expresses her disapproval of Dave’s nicknames with a slight downturn of her mouth.

“They don’t even talk to each other.”

There’s a snapping sound and Sollux cusses, fingers pressing nimbly into the console in his lap. He’s working on installing an independent power supply before he sets the computer up to have two monitors. One will show the Trollian client, the other John. The generator of sorts is in response to the recent blackouts on the meteor. Last time the power went out for twenty minutes and Karkat nearly had a panic attack.

“They communicate differently.”

“Are you going to explain that cryptic as hell comment, or do I have to guess that there’s some psychic troll shit at play?”

Rose taps her fingers on her book in irritation. “Dave, I can’t believe that you really discard all this information that we repeatedly give you. It’s rare for highbloods to possess any psionic ability. If they do, it only exhibits itself at full maturity. At the point where we are viewing him, John is sweeps away from maturity and even then there are further stages to his development-”

“So he’s not psychic?”

“No. At least, not in this point of his life.”

“Then what do you mean, they talk without talking.”

“That’s not what I said.” Rose considers for a moment. “But yes, I suppose it is also appropriate. They talk in a language that, even when we knew him, only John was able to speak. Do you have any idea what I could be referring to?”

There’s the clatter of a dropped panel and Sollux hisses with pain. He’s about to put his fingers in his mouth but stops himself. “Rookie mithtake,” he mutters and wraps his hand up in one of the pieces of material Jade is holding for him.

“You’re not meant to eat the mind honey?” Jade asks him.

“No. It’th worthe for you than crushed applefruit fluidth.”

Dave goes very still. “Wait. You guys don’t drink apple juice?”


	4. Active

Enter name.

Your name is DULCIS SONDIA. You are a TEAL BLOOD and are generally disgruntled by the hemospectrum system which narrowly prevents your nobility in Alternian society. Otherwise you are a KIND and EVEN-TEMPERED TROLL with a great interest in ALTERNIA’S FINER BUT LESSER-KNOWN ARTS. That is to say, MUSIC.

You are already proficient with several instruments. You often regale your lawnring with harmonious melodies produced by your WINDYBIND, an instrument your ANCESTOR played when marching with the midbloods into war. It is said she was the sole cause for thousands of defections until the Grand Highblood ordered that she march with him. You consider this a triumph on your ancestor’s part, and learn from this story that with indirect complaint you will always get what you want.

Unlike most trolls, you do actually love music. Together with your LUSUS, a SHINING SPINNERBIRD, you enjoy an art which has nearly been lost at the hands of uncultured savages.

Your highblood friend whose status you openly begrudge has given you the nickname ‘DULL’ which he assures you is incredibly ironic. But you are not sure why that is a thing you would want to be.

Your trolltag is acapellaControvert and you s P e a k - a t - a - m e a s u r e d - P a c e |

What will you do?

> Dulcis: Retrieve arms from the purple box.

You’re completely disinterested in following the commands of a person you cannot see. You disregard them immediately and do whatever it is you would normally do.

> Dulcis: Get violin.

You sit down and carefully hook your ORCHESTRANOMAPHONE over your thigh. For the next two hours or so you practice with it. The keys are obedient underneath your ministrative fingers and the strings bend beautifully at your deliberate provocation. It isn’t your favourite instrument but it is your silliest, and at SEVEN SWEEPS you still have a childish appreciation of anything silly.

> Dulcis: Play a haunting refrain on the violin.

You tuck the orchestranomaphone back into its pod, as if it were your child and you were somehow able within your society to have a relationship with your offspring. This is your MUSIC WALL, which is covered in specially shaped SEED PODS. They protect your MANY AND BELOVED INSTRUMENTS from the thoughtless interference of nature.

You have twenty-three instruments and are able to perfectly perform with fifteen of them. Of course, you PRACTICE REGULARLY to maintain your superior skill. Your neighbours hate you, but you only have hate for one person - your miraculously detestable KISMESIS. You are sure this is a disappointment to every one of them.

> Dulcis: Look out window.

Now that your orchestranomaphone practice is done, it’s time to enjoy yourself. Accordingly you climb onto the roof of your hive with the help of your lusus. Her name is Lady Mary de Wing and she always listens to you when you come up here to practice with your windybind. You are not only grateful for her sophistication and cultural understanding, but also her willingness to catch you when you fall off the roof.

The winds are harsh up here, which is perfect. Your windybind requires that particular force of nature in order to produce the purest sounds of all of your instruments.

> Dulcis: Examine book on desk.

You loop the instrument across your chest. It is visually similar to a bow, but far less unintelligibly violent. The main string leads from your shoulder to your upper thigh. There is a network of fine strings that are impossible to locate unless you are experienced with this beautiful and mystifying instrument of your people.

Lady Mary taps out a starting beat for you, and you begin to play.

* * *

A terrible noise echoes through the corridors of the laboratory.

Anyone who hears it immediately cries out in agony, clutching at their ears and wishing that they didn’t have them.

At the source of the noise, Sollux has dropped the console he was working on and is quickly losing control of his psionics. Jade is crying tears heavy with pain. Rose is the only one of them with sense enough to try to exit the room.

As she steps out of the door she finds Karkat and Kanaya hurtling towards her. They shout but none of them is able to hear. Karkat pushes into the room but falls to the ground before he can get to the computer.

In Gamzee’s respiteblock the jars shake and liquid sloshes out. He sits between them with his head on his knees.

Terezi and Tavros hug each other fiercely, something they are unlikely to do in any other situation.

The noise goes on, like a burst of violent fire, scraping and rising and snapping and falling and Jade actually passes out.

Dave just looks at them because it seems impossible that they could be reacting like this to what is a pretty decent song.

* * *

You lay back on the platform at the top of your hive and listen to the way the wind sounds today. It gets more beautiful every time you hear it, like it’s been practicing. This is the only time you can ever completely let go, immerse yourself in the wind, just be. It’s like a drug to you. You always wish you could get more of it.

Your fingers uncurl. Your chest rises and falls with your breath. Just by living, breathing, you feel like you are a part of this amazing thing. Like you’re adding to the song of another person, or maybe life itself. Your hair blows around. You really like that feeling. 

You forget that you have horns. You forget that you get blood rage. You forget about slime and blood politics and murder. You forget that you sometimes even frighten yourself. You forget you are a troll.

And in these moments things come back to you. Thoughts you’d forgotten you’d had. Words that don’t make sense. Colours you’ve never seen. Sensations. Feelings.

You swear you can remember lying like this in other places. Bleeding a different colour. Being afraid. Not of yourself, but of things stronger than you. Fingers. Skin. Touches. Everything felt different. 

You remember being able to fly. You’re so out of it now that you can’t remember not being able to fly. So you jump off the balcony without the slightest fear.

* * *

> Dulcis: Take book.

The song finishes naturally and Lady Mary taps her applause. You stroke the windybind with more love than you show any of your other instruments. It hums at you. Finally you take it off and set it where it rests - in the middle of your roof, standing upright. It keeps the strings limber and serenades you with music when the weather is especially violent.

Then you sit down beside it and wait.

> Dulcis: Go explore the house.

You’re not going to do that. You’re waiting.

> Dulcis: Tiptoe to observatory.

The windybind jolts. That means it’s starting.

* * *

“TURN OFF THE SOUND!” Karkat screams and reaches over to the monitor.

Dave slaps his hand away.

“WHAT THE FUCK IS IT NOW?!”

Dave shakes his head.

“Dave, please! It’s too much...” Rose half-shouts at him. Her ears are shot and Kanaya is touching hers like she expects them to be bleeding.

He’s not exactly sure why he does it, but he puts a finger to his lips. He’s got that feeling right before the climax of a song, the build-up to the break-down. Somehow he knows this will be good.

* * *

==>

The wind becomes rougher. You have prepared for this and are wearing a THICK BLUE SCARF. Were any Lalondes watching you right now, they would certainly approve of your fashion choices. The scarf is both practical and elegant.

Notes are drawn out from the windybind, faint and trailing. It sends shivers up your spine which are almost definitely not related at all to the fact that it is suddenly very cold. Yes, you tremble out of refined artistic appreciation, and not because of natural bodily processes. It is crass to even suggest you are anything other than a PARAGON OF MUSICAL VIRTUE.

The boy rises up from the side of your hive. He is obviously QUITE INSANE, or possibly AN ALIEN, because he is all sorts of colours boys really ought not to be. His skin is pink and he has pathetic little nubby fingers which would shame him were he ever to attempt to play any of your instruments, aside from this one which you will concede he is rather good at.

He doesn’t have any horns and his sign is also one you have never seen before. But then, how much sense do you expect to get out of someone wearing a cape. It is exceptionally silly. You fancy yourself a little bit flushed for him.

He never opens his eyes, but you like to imagine that they are coloured purple, and one day he will reveal to you that he is a particular sort of troll nobility and also that he wants you in his heart quadrant.

You listen as he plays his wind music for you.

Sometimes it seems like his fingers never actually touch the strings. Wind collects around him like it is his closest friend. For once in your life, you admire someone too much to feel jealous of them. If you cannot play this music yourself, it only means you are able to devote all of yourself to listening to it.

* * *

This music is delicate, blustering in places, tripping over itself, but endearing. Dave’s pretty happy with himself for holding to his guns just now. It’s the first time he’s heard Egbert play anything and he’s surprisingly good at it.

Jade comes to and basically everyone calms down. Dave finds himself tapping out a beat on the computer desk. When they get John back they are seriously having a jam session.

* * *

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

TC: ok im Sorry  
TC: i know your3 not normally on at thiS tim3  
TC: but i r3ally n33d your advic3  
TC: fri3ndl3ad3rShip, what3v3r you call it  
TC: h3llo???  
TC: john ar3 you th3r3???  
TC: cmon man fuck thiS iS Str3SSing m3 out  
TC: now im worrying your3 not ok...  
TC: john by th3 cond3Sc3S wrath  
TC: if your3 aSl33p, log out of trollian  
TC: thiS iS damn inS3nSitiv3  
TC: ...  
TC: unl3SS your3 not ok, th3n im r3ally Sorry  
TC: Shit  
TC: ok, im coming to S33 you  
AA: whoooooooOOOOOOOOOooooossssSSSSsssssshhhhhh  
TC: john for fuckS Sak3  
AA: oooooooooooOOOOOOoooOOOOOOOOsssshhhh  
TC: fuck Shit what iS wrong with you  
AA: whhhoooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
TC: im coming ov3r  
TC: t3ll your lusus  
AA: ooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooosssssssSSSSSShhhhh

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] ceased trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

AA: whoooooooooOOOOOOOOOOoooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOssh  
AA: oooooOOOOooooooOOOOOOOSSSSSSSHHHHHHHH

* * *

You wake up to your friend holding on to your shirt and shaking you. Her eyes are wide and she’s gritting her teeth.

“Trip,” you say.

She lets out a harsh cry and slaps you across the face. You take it in stride, because she wouldn’t do that to you without a good reason.

You sit up a bit. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

Trip crumples so that she’s kneeling beside you, her legs touching yours, and scrunches her face into her hands. You would worry about her claws but you know she keeps them blunt. She’s a paranoid person, which you guess makes sense since she’s basically had to raise herself. ‘Better safe than sorry’ has probably kept her alive.

“Trip...?”

She lunges forward so that she’s half on top of you and you’re awkwardly hugging. You’re not used to this kind of affection from her but you adjust quickly, patting her back.

“Hey, it’s okay...”

“No it’s fucking not! What the fuck were you doing to me, spacing out like that! If this is one of your stupid pranks, John, I’m putting you into a blood rage because this is as serious as that, okay?!”

You blink at her. “I’ve been sleeping here for a while now, Trip. I don’t know what I’m meant to have done but-”

She slaps you again and you growl at her.

“Sorry, I’m just so relieved.” Trip settles back so that she’s beside you, not on top of you. “Check your chat logs. Maybe someone hacked you, or you typed it in your sleep. Really I don’t give a shit. Don’t put me through that again.”

You take out your mobile line and read over your logs. It’s just some weird stuff that doesn’t mean anything, but Trip has taken it really seriously.

She curls her skinny knees up and presses her face into them. Her hair, wild and curling, goes down to the shoulders of her worn t-shirt. There’s a hole at the seam that you want to poke your finger through.

“I thought you’d gone insane.” Her voice is muffled. “Once highbloods do that...they never really come back. Just keep your shit together, John. For me, okay?”

You didn’t think Trip knew many highbloods and you’re not sure who she could be talking about. “If I ever feel I can’t control it, I’ll talk to you about it first. You know I’d do that.” You put a hand on her shoulder in a way you hope is comforting.

She exhales loudly. “Yeah. Good. Now, since I’m here - wanna strife?”

* * *

“So his human self is his dream self now,” says Jade slowly.

Rose is writing something in her book. “It appears so. He’s not aware of it, that much is clear.”

“But how does that even work?”

“Human John was never taken out of existence. This is where the chronological approach to his timeline becomes an issue. Rather than saying there is one John, who has been changed, we can say that there are two Johns. Troll John’s timeline didn’t follow on from Human John’s, it was an entirely new one. So we have two timelines, two lines to follow - in the same way we lived on Earth, and our dream selves lived on Prospit and Derse. They didn’t stop existing when we were awake. They were just in a different place, so we never saw them.

“We could take this to mean that when Troll John is asleep, he takes control of Human John, whose body is able to travel between Alternia and wherever it goes during Troll John’s waking hours. You saw that Troll John’s body lay there as Human John moved. It didn’t suddenly disappear. The two bodies exist simultaneously. It’s quite possible Human John is similar to a John from a doomed timeline.

“I can’t begin to comprehend what this could mean for John, or what it might teach us about the game and what happened in the past with our dream selves - and my explanation is only a theory with the same flaws as the chronological approach. I’m just trying to make sense of it for you. I hope it was helpful,” Rose finishes.

“Oh, very!” Jade smiles at her.

Beside them Karkat bashes his head repeatedly into the keyboard.

* * *

> gtuyjyr4reyhkondtyth

In your moment of confusion Trip gets three quick shots into your side. She always strikes three times. Three is kind of her thing. A lot of trolls view their horns as prophetic, and Trip was born with four. One of them was snapped cleanly off in the caverns and it healed back like there was never anything there. 

It makes what she’s going to do next predictable, but it also means when she gets a shot in it’s followed pretty quickly by more of the same. Once Trip gets under your guard she’s won the strife.

> iojhutgfvrfuuiopooi85

“What-” you manage to say before Trip knocks you to the ground. You intuitively roll over and get back to your feet. She gives you a questioning look but doesn’t wait for an answer before coming at you again.

> 8899999999999999999999999

There’s three blows to your neck and you fall backwards. Trip follows you down, bracing your shoulders and waiting a second for her win to be uncontested. Then she runs hands over your back and chest to see if you’ve been badly wounded. 

“What was that?” you ask her dazedly.

“I was about to ask you the same thing,” she says, spitting blood onto the ground and making a face. “Hurting anywhere?”

“No.” You blink again. “No, I just...”

“Don’t tell me you’re hearing voices,” she teases you.

You laugh weakly and let her help you to your feet. That was far from the strife you wanted and you inwardly worry that maybe Trip had a point and you are going insane.

* * *

Enter name.

Your name is LIRODE CAERUL. You are a VIOLET BLOOD and consequently a SEA-DWELLER. You are EASILY BORED and often resort to RANDOM KILLINGS to satisfy your need for entertainment. You consider yourself a GENEROUS person, as you willingly associate with midbloods, but see any interactions with lowbloods as a betrayal to your kind. You have no need for quadrants and expect that you would quickly tire of any romantic relationship. This is of course excepting your lovely MOIRAIL, whose musical gifts are endlessly surprising to you.

You have a rather unfortunate PHOBIA OF SCUTTLEBEASTS and rely on your friend JOHN to remove them for you. He is clearly inferior to you in every way, but that is quite alright because everyone is inferior to you. He has given you the nickname ‘LIRO’ which is used so extensively you occasionally forget your real name.

Your LUSUS is a SKYWHALE which makes mealtimes at your hive excessively complicated. However you are a POSITIVE THINKER and would probably be a benevolent noble, were you not so prone to random acts of murder.

Your trolltag is grandAlacrity and you speak in a Formal, Pointed manner.

What will you do?

> Lirode: Play a silly flute refrain.

That is fairly impossible for you to do UNDERWATER.

Besides, your moirail is the musical one. You are more than happy to leave melodies, tunes and riffs in her capable hands.

> Lirode: Quickly retrieve firearms from wall.

Impossible. Those firearms are purely decorative, and you are the sort of troll who refuses to rely on paltry weapons. If you can’t kill something with the sharpened points of your teeth and vice-like grip of your arms then you are hardly more than a wiggler. ‘What happens in the brooding caverns, stays in the brooding caverns’ is a crock of shit.

> Lirode: Look out window.

You look out the window.

Oh, what a surprise. There’s some more water out there. Probably very much like the water in here. Look at that. Fish swimming around. Well. What a scintillating thing it is you have just done.

> Lirode: Open chest.

You don’t keep any weapons in here. Oh no. You are civilised beyond civility itself. You keep your purely decorative weapons on the walls of your hive and in what would have been your WEAPONS CHEST you keep your RUSTED PIECES OF DISCARDED CUTLERY.

No one will ever look for them here.

> Lirode: Feed your friend.

What a reasonable proposal. You collect your WHALE-SIZED NET and a TASTY FISH CUBE. You kill so often and randomly that you have enough of these to last your lusus another five sweeps. The carcasses of the fish you have slaughtered are compressed together into a three foot long by three foot wide cube. You have then tied each of them lovingly and attentively with STRAPS OF FISHSKIN you had crafted yourself.

You make sure to lock the door of your hive to prevent unwanted scuttlebeast intrusions. Then you swim up to the surface to the ISLAND your lusus frequents.

The guy who lives here is a huge dick and you wish you had nothing to do with him. Unfortunately he shares your blood status. You are obliged to make small conversation with him.

==>

When you have convinced AMPORA once again that you are not interested in him or the CONDESCE’S HEIR he claims to be protecting, you have to suffer romantic advances from the trigger-happy harpoon-wielder. You get bored very quickly but know better than to engage him in strife. Eventually he allows you to tend to your lusus.

Skywhales are among the most dignified of misplaced, oversized sea beasts. You return to your hive feeling better for having visited him.

> Lirode: Answer troll.

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

AC: g o o d - e v e n i n g |

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] is now idle --

GA: Good evening to you as well, Dulcis!  
GA: I apologise, I was Momentarily away from My husktop.  
AC: a h |  
AC: i - w o n d e r e d |  
GA: Yes, I was dealing with that Unsavoury Ampora.  
GA: He is Often Unnecessarily Difficult and it is not to My credit but I wish we were able to revoke his blood status.  
AC: i t - i s - s u c h - a - s h a m e - w h e n - t h o s e - o f - h i g h - s t a t u s - d o - n o t - a t t e m P t - t o - b e - w o r t h y - o f - i t |  
GA: You are Quite Right.  
GA: How are you tonight? Well, I take it?  
AC: y e s - t h a n k - y o u |  
AC: m y - r e l a t i o n s h i P s - a r e - f a r i n g - w e l l |  
GA: Have you encountered that Promising candidate for your flushed quadrant again?  
AC: y e s |  
GA: Go on.  
AC: h e - m a k e s - t h e - m o s t - b e a u t i f u l - m u s i c |  
AC: b u t - i - d o n t - t h i n k - h e - s e e s - m e |  
GA: You are a Beautiful troll, Dulcis.  
AC: n o - i - m e a n |  
AC: l i t e r a l l y |  
AC: h i s - e y e s - a r e - a l w a y s - c l o s e d |  
GA: That is Unfortunate.  
AC: y e s |  
GA: Well, if he will not look at you - he will Certainly hear you?  
GA: You have told me So Elegantly, that music is a True reflection of the troll that makes it.  
GA: Is this not a solution?  
AC: y e s |  
AC: t h a n k - y o u |  
GA: That is Quite Alright.  
AC: a n d - h o w - a r e - y o u |  
GA: Still Very Lonely  
GA: But these sorts of things don’t last.

* * *

You slide dazedly out of your recuperacoon and fall into a welcoming pile of hats. Though Salamandad will scold you for this later, you are tired and still confused about what has been happening to you recently, and this is just what you want to do.

Your husktop makes a buzzing sound.

You roll ungracefully over to it, hats sticking to your back and one of your feet. It’s a message from a person who has suddenly remembered that this is a function of the Trollian client. It didn’t stop being a thing that existed at all.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

CG: JOHN.  
AA: hi!  
CG: WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT.  
CG: YOU LOOK LIKE A WIGGLER THAT NEVER LEARNED TO WALK ON TWO LEGS LIKE EVERY SINGLE OTHER TROLL IN THE PROUD HISTORY OF OUR EXISTENCE.  
CG: OR THE VALUE OF ABLUTIONS FOR THAT MATTER.  
AA: hehe, sorry.  
AA: i'm tired, i didn't really think about it.  
CG: YOU JUST WOKE UP. WHY ARE YOU TIRED?  
CG: HAS YOUR SOPOR GONE STALE? YOU HAVE TO REFRESH IT EVERY WEEK OTHERWISE IT WILL ADVERSELY AFFECT YOUR HEALTH. THIS IS THE SORT OF SHIT I WOULD EXPECT YOUR LUSUS TO EXPLAIN TO YOU, BUT HE’S A LIZARD AND YOU CAN'T HOLD THEM ACCOUNTABLE FOR ANYTHING EXCEPT BLOWING BUBBLES FROM THEIR RESPIRATORY CAVITIES.  
AA: wow, that's a lot of text!  
AA: yeah i know that. salamandad's on top of the business of raising me.  
AA: so you don't have to worry. :)  
CG: I’M NOT WORRYING FUCKNUTS.  
AA: c'mon.  
AA: you're worrying about me.  
CG: I AM ABOUT AS CONCERNED ABOUT YOU AS WHATEVER WILL COME OUT OF TAVROS’ MOUTH NEXT. TO PAINT THIS EXPOSITORY PICTURE FOR YOU, TAVROS IS THAT BIG SQUIGGLY LINE THAT YOU THINK MIGHT BE A TREE BUT IS ACTUALLY JUST A BIG POINTLESS SQUIGGLY LINE.  
CG: WHEREAS YOU ARE THAT SMUDGE THAT SOMEHOW ENDED UP ON THE CANVAS.  
AA: so you want to get me off? ;)  
CG: WHAT?  
CG: NO.  
CG: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SAYING.  
AA: hehehe.  
AA: i bet you're blushing right now.  
CG: WHY WOULD I BE BLUSHING, NOOKSTAIN?  
CG: THAT WOULD IMPLY I GAVE EVEN THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF A FUCK ABOUT YOUR OBLIVIOUS, CHILDISH ADVANCES.  
CG: TROLL THE TROLL, HAHA, IT’S THE FUNNIEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD.  
AA: you're totally blushing.  
AA: you're so cute.  
CG: JOHN WHY ARE YOU TALKING LIKE THIS TO ME.  
CG: DO YOU THINK YOU’RE STILL ASLEEP? GET BACK INTO YOUR RECUPERACOON.  
AA: why wouldn't i talk to you like this?  
AA: is there some rule against me flirting with you?  
CG: HOLY SHIT.  
CG: YOU ACTUALLY THINK YOU’RE FLIRTING WITH ME.  
AA: i don't ‘think’ i'm flirting with you, geez.  
AA: i'm doing it.  
CG: AND WHY IN THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO THAT?  
AA: oh shit dude  
AA: i know what's going on here.  
AA: you're out of time again.  
CG: WHAT  
AA: hahahahaha  
CG: EXPLAIN.  
AA: sorry, i'm really tired. this probably seems a lot funnier to me than it actually is.  
CG: FUCKING EXPLAIN THIS TO ME, EGBERT.  
AA: come on, you can figure it out!

* * *

Dave slaps Karkat on the shoulder, startling him. “What do you think ‘out of time’ could possibly mean, Kar?”

“Shut up.”

“Wow you’re going a really nice shade of red there. Scroll up so I can see what you were talking about.”

“No. Go away.”

But instead of leaving Dave crouches down next to him. “It’s like you’re having a crisis about this. Is it so hard to believe you might have messed around with Troll John’s timeline, just like you messed with our John’s?”

“It just goes to show that future me is a fucking moron,” Karkat mutters.

For some reason that makes Dave laugh.

* * *

You roll over onto your back, trailing slime all over your floor. It’s just as well hives don’t have carpet. You have no idea what carpet is, but you’re pretty sure it gets messy when you roll slime all over it.

In the spirit of true laziness, you take out your mobile line and access the chat there. You can roll as much as you want and possibly make a quick getaway if Salamandad wakes up early and tries to come into your respiteblock.

AA: hey?  
AA: you're taking a while to respond.  
CG: I’M STILL HERE.  
AA: oh, good!  
CG: DAMMIT. SO WHAT DO YOU KNOW.  
AA: of course i can't tell you that!  
CG: WHAT.  
CG: WHY THE HELL NOT.  
AA: i'm taking a page out of my friend's book here.  
AA: i'm not giving anything away so that our past conversations for me are as natural as they, well, were when we had them.  
CG: JOHN FOR FUCK’S SAKE WHY DO YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO HARLEY.  
CG: DON’T YOU DARE START UP ALL THAT PASSWORD BULLSHIT WITH ME.  
AA: ok, i don't know who that is.  
CG: WHICH FRIEND ARE YOU REFERRING TO THEN?  
AA: i think that's something i shouldn't tell you.  
AA: sorry!  
CG: ...  
CG: WAIT, WE’VE HAD MORE THAN ONE CONVERSATION EARLIER IN YOUR TIMELINE?  
AA: oops, yeah, i guess that was a slip.  
AA: it's good for me though. i get to talk to you more!  
CG: john dude you shouldnt get excited about that  
CG: this guy is so far from fun central hes like half an hour away on the train  
CG: gotta ride out all the way past boring town, if you hit sortofoksville youve gone too far  
AA: oh, hi.  
AA: do you know me?  
CG: how telling that you would ask me that instead of the other way around  
CG: hmm yes very interesting  
CG: i knew you before all the baby mutilation  
AA: what the fuck  
CG: hold on this guy is trying to draw dicks all over this conversation  
AA: ...  
CG: gfuh8]-efwnkd  
CG: nidew0=3,p[enis  
CG: penism3e]pe4niqwbis  
AA: are you okay?  
CG: YEAH.  
CG: IT’S JUST THAT STRIDER IS A DOUCHE.  
CG: FUCK, HE DOESN’T EVEN DISAGREE WITH ME.  
AA: strider?  
AA: that sounds like a cool name.  
CG: NO JOHN IT IS THE LAMEST NAME IN THE HISTORY OF YOUR PLANET.  
AA: i dunno dude i've heard a lot worse.  
AA: my name's kind of terrible.  
AA: my real one, not john.  
AA: that's just a nickname.  
CG: I MEAN YOUR ORIGINAL PLANET.  
CG: SHIT.  
CG: FORGET I JUST SAID THAT.  
CG: WIPE IT FROM YOUR PITIFUL EXCUSE FOR A THINK PAN.  
AA: oh so we're back to that now?  
AA: sweet. i'm sitting on some great one liners over here.  
CG: I FIND THAT INCREDIBLY HARD TO BELIEVE.  
CG: ALSO STRIDER’S STILL HERE SO NO, DON’T DO THAT.  
AA: it's sad we're not going to give that guy a show.  
AA: he's your friend, he'll probably really appreciate it.  
CG: THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS WRONG WITH WHAT YOU JUST SAID.  
CG: GET BACK INTO YOUR RECUPERACOON.  
AA: aww.  
CG: GOG ALMIGHTY.  
CG: I CAN’T DEAL WITH THIS SHIT.  
AA: g'night.  
CG: YEAH, WHATEVER.  
AA: <3

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

CG: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT.

* * *

> Dulcis: Look out window.

Through the window you can see the APPLEFRUIT ORCHARD behind your hive. Though the red orbs that grow on these trees are HIGHLY POISONOUS to you, they are the main source of food for Lady Mary de Wing. They are the only trees in your lawnring and you’re proud to take care of them. They set you apart from your midblood neighbours and have the additional advantage of being aesthetically pleasing.

You have noticed recently that some of the APPLEFRUIT has grown a SORT OF YELLOW COLOUR. As long as it doesn’t affect Lady Mary’s health, you are happy to treat that as nature’s celebration of your new blackrom relationship.

> Dulcis: Pick the fruit.

You are too careful to even touch the applefruit. The juices inside are like acid to trolls and contact with it will burn through your thick skin. If you ate one it would make you sick for days. That is enough for the DRONES to come and CULL you. There isn’t any way you’ll risk that happening. Your music still needs to be shared with so many unenlightened people.

You are happy to walk among the trees, though. They are good protection from the too-harsh sun beating down on you. For added measure, you also wear your COOLKID SHADES. If any Striders were watching you at this moment they would certainly approve of what is both a practical and vaguely humorous fashion accessory.

> Dulcis: Do a somersault and squawk like a wild featherbeast.

Anything for the sake of art.

> Dulcis: Answer troll.

It’s a message from your kismesis. You decide to make her wait for a while.

You climb up into one of the applefruit trees, just the way you have since you were newly one sweep old. Your cardigan catches on the branches, so when you are sitting comfortably you take it off and throw it onto the ground. It is this occasional moment of reckless abandon that you, a girl of only six sweeps, very much enjoy.

You swing your feet, appreciating the rustle of the leaves around you. One has landed on your shoulder and you brush it off.

> Dulcis: Answer troll.

You know this will be driving Tripel mad. You smile to yourself and think you will leave her hanging a while longer.

You hum a tune Lady Mary clicked out to you when you were a child. Even though you have learned far more sophisticated compositions, this is still one of your favourites.

> Dulcis: Answer troll.

There’s the startling sound of something crashing into the side of your hive. After the first it makes more sickening, jarring, breaking, painful noises until the thing collapses onto the ground between your hive and the orchard. The white of it is too bright in the sunlight for you to look at it directly. Lady Mary! No!

You jump down from the tree, hurting your ankle from the force of impact. Before you can try to limp over to what you are sure is your injured lusus she strikes out, long wings colliding with the trunks of the trees and shaking them until leaves, branches and applefruit crash down around you. She cries out in agony and you try to run to her, but your bad ankle catches on a branch and you go tumbling, hurting your wrist in a similar way.

You are so wracked with concern for your lusus that you don’t even notice the applefruit tearing open and spraying you with liquid. Tears run down your face and you cry out to Lady Mary, who you are convinced is dying.

> Dulcis: Answer troll.

A minute or so later you are lying on the ground, half-covered in branches, crying silently to yourself as you feel the acid of the applefruit deeply burn your skin. Lady Mary has stopped moving. You don’t know what to do.

So you follow the direction and open the message your kismesis has left you. It reads simply:

TC: g3t inSid3 now

* * *

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

AC: j o h n |  
AC: i - a m - i n - t r o u b l e |  
AC: P l e a s e - c o m e |  
AA: i'm heading to your hive now.  
AA: is that where you are?  
AC: y  
AA: okay, i'll be there very soon.  
AC: ty  
AA: are you outside?  
AA: dull, i'm looking for you. please answer me.  
AC: y  
AA: i see you.

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] ceased trolling acapellaControvert [AC] \--

When you open your eyes, you are looking into his blue ones. They are filled with worry but he smiles at you despite it. You’re lifted up into his arms and he carries you in a manner that would undoubtedly appear very romantic, if you weren’t so emotionally ravaged by the scenario which had brought it about.

“The applefruit...” you say weakly.

“It’s okay. It doesn’t matter.”

And you really believe him. So you curl up against his chest and slowly lose your grip on consciousness.

He bends with you to look at Lady Mary. Any hope you may have felt dies when he straightens up again shortly after and takes you into the hive.


	5. Active

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there are ever any changes that you think should be made to the tags, please comment and I'll make them.
> 
> This chapter will be rewritten in the near future!

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] began trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

AC: d i d - y o u - k n o w |  
AC: w h a t - w o u l d - h a P P e n |  
TC: wow, l3tS juSt g3t Straight into it  
AC: t e l l - m e |  
TC: calm down  
AC: d i d - y o u - k n o w |  
TC: ok, y3S  
AC: t h a n k - y o u |  
AC: h o w - d i d - y o u - k n o w |  
TC: i dont think i Should Say  
AC: T E L L - M E |  
TC: cond3Sc3S panti3S thiS iS r3ally not that big a d3al  
TC: i got a m3SSag3  
TC: i dont know who it waS from  
AC: w h o - w a s - i t - f r o m |  
TC: ill Show you th3 conv3rSation  
AC: N O |  
AC: i - d o n t - w a n t - t o - s e e - i t |  
AC: w h a t - d i d - y o u - k n o w |  
TC: that Som3thing waS going to craSh into your tr33S and you w3r3 in th3m  
TC: it SoundS lik3 you got out ok  
TC: no n33d to b3 thanking m3  
AC: i t - w a s - m y - l u s u s |  
TC:  
TC: what  
TC: shit  
TC: are you ok?  
AC: n o |  
AC: i - h a t e - y o u - m o r e - t h a n - a n y t h i n g - n o w |  
AC: s o - d o n t - w o r r y - y o u r s e l f - y o u r - q u a d r a n t - i s - s a f e |  
AC: i - w i l l - n e v e r - t h a n k - y o u - f o r - t h i s |

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] ceased trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

TC: thats not what i meant  
TC: dulcis?

* * *

Sollux has rigged up the computer and everyone has brought chairs to the room so that they can sit and watch comfortably. There’s talk of putting another of Jade’s box refrigerators next to it, running off the same supply. It would mean having to drag Karkat out less often.

“Do you think we could skip ahead?” Jade says quietly. It has visibly upset her watching the troll lose her lusus in an accident which has also left her with minor disfigurement.

“I would like to call for a demonstration of democracy. Who of us gathered here would like to skip ahead? Raise your left hand,” Terezi directs them all. Everyone puts their hand up except for Tavros. It’s a clear majority vote. “I’m not going to count that, coolkid, because that is your right hand. If that was deliberate it was gross insubordination and you will have to answer to the firm hand of the law.”

“Yes ma’am.” Dave gives her a straight-faced salute.

“Vote carried. We will skip ahead. These are the words of our self-instated democracy. Just the way democracy should be.” Terezi sniffs deeply.

There is another blackout and a low buzzing right before the power comes back on half a minute later.

“I think those are becoming more frequent,” Rose whispers to Kanaya, who nods in reply.

“How far ahead?” Sollux asks.

“Skip, to the next dark season,” is Tavros’ quiet suggestion.

In a few moments they’re looking at a much darker screen. John is visiting his sea-dweller friend, who they have all unwittingly taken to calling ‘fish killer’. He communicates with him via his mobile line so as not to lose the oxygen in his lungs. Every few minutes Salamandad will come back from the surface of the water and case his head in a bubble so that he can breathe.

* * *

You want to grin but you’ve learned that’s a bad idea when you’re underwater. Instead you smile at Liro who is baring all his teeth at you in a hospitable way.

AA: how is dulcis? i haven’t seen her much since everything that happened at her hive.

He checks his screen and clicks at you in approval. “It is kind of you to show concern. Unfortunately it is not concern that will help her. I can only imagine that it is a very difficult thing to lose the one who has reared you, and they were particularly close.”

AA: oh. well, i might visit her sometime.

“I am certain she would like that. As for you, would you like something to eat or drink? Next time your guardian comes down with a bubble, of course.”

AA: i’ve just had lunch so that’s okay but i was wondering if i could take a couple of fish home.

Liro laughs and bubbles come out from his mouth. “Well, it is not likely that I will ever run out of them! Yes, I can do that for you John.”

AA: have any crabs been giving you problems?

“Oh no. I always message you immediately when I find one. You are using that odd name for them again, by the way. I hope I am not rude to point that out.”

AA: haha, that’s okay! i don’t know where i get these words from.

“They are fairly silly, yes.”

AA: liro, is it all right for me to ask...

“Go right ahead. There’re no answers without questions.”

AA: you’re almost nine sweeps old, aren’t you?

“Ah.” Liro smiles differently now, more warmth and a bit of sadness. “This. Yes, my youth in the eyes of the Condesce is about to end. I will have to leave my hive and travel to other lands, tear them apart as best I can. I will answer any questions you might have.”

AA: i’m not sure all of them are polite.

He laughs again and you’re happy for it. For a moment there he just looked too sad. “You might bring about a blush, but you can hardly offend me. I have known you since you were little more than a wiggler. Though we talk less often than perhaps most friends do, I am comfortable with you, John.”

AA: okay.  
AA: thank you.

“You are quite welcome.”

AA: did you fill any more of your quadrants?

He stretches his arms out, eyes trailing along the walls. Probably keeping vigilant watch for any invading scuttlebeasts. “I suppose I will need to now. It will probably sound odd but Dulcis was always enough for me.”

AA: you love her?

“I do apologise; I am not sure what that word means. I am afraid it is another of those that you have made up.”

AA: ah.  
AA: gosh.  
AA: it means she fills all of your quadrants.  
AA: i know how rude this sounds, i’m sorry i brought it up.

But instead of getting rightfully angry at you, Liro is thoughtful. His cheeks turn faintly violet. “Yes. I suppose you could say that. It is interesting to have a word for something I never thought was possible. Yes. I love Dulcis.” He frowns slightly. “It is a shame she is a teal blood. Even a moirallegiance with her is pushing the bounds of propriety. But that is the life of nobility. Compromise to the end of leading by example.”

You’re not sure if it’s good or bad timing when Salamandad swims in and blows a bubble around your head. You wait a moment and then breathe in through your nose. You can naturally hold your breath for twenty minutes or so, but it’s a lot better when you’ve got a supply of fresh oxygen.

AA: are you still growing?

“Only minutely. I will undergo the process of pupation in another sweep and will grow more during that period.”

AA: is it uncomfortable?

Liro blinks at you, as if trying to work out the subject of your question. “I will answer you truthfully, then. If my openness becomes an issue I can dismiss it as mentoring a younger highblood... Emotionally, yes, it is very uncomfortable. I was never too committed to living here and I do not have many friends. But I prefer a life of freedom than one where I will have no choice but to commit to what I have not chosen. I am afraid of many things. Here I can kill sea life without any sort of restraint. I do not know what I will do without that outlet. I suspect, sometimes, that the Condesce would have me be wild and unsatisfied.

“Physically, I want to grow. I am bored of looking like this and only being so capable. I want to know what kind of adult I will be. I look forward to finding out who I will become. Socially...” He shrugs. “I do not want to leave Dulcis. It is as simple as that.”

AA: i’m sorry.

You type it without thinking and immediately regret the impertinence. His eyes flash at you but then his shoulders slouch and you see Liro for the first time as he really is.

He’s actually shorter than you. You never realised that before.

“Yes, well. You can’t help your blood colour. I think you must understand.”

You nod.

“Good. Hopefully we will be able to retain some of that sense when we are holding our own positions of authority. It would be nice to eliminate some of the...”

AA: hemoism?

“What does that mean?”

AA: uh, treatment based on blood type.

“Yes. I am not sure how that is pronounced but it is a fitting word.”

* * *

“Wow that’s some real nice promise of political reform going on there. I didn’t know fish killer had it in him,” Dave says between handfuls of Fruit Gushers. In Human John’s honour, of course.

“He can’t really have thought like that,” Karkat whispers and leans forward in his chair.

“You’ll just have to face up to it, Kar. Not every troll was a dick that wanted you culled.”

“Well obviously not, now that it turns out John was one of them,” Jade points out.

“It’s unlikely that they would have been successful,” Kanaya says. “Even given the chance.”

Sollux is unusually quiet, staring at some point in the wall he can’t be able to see with his poor vision. “It’th...a lot that they jutht thought about it.” 

“What was that about filling all the quadrants?” Tavros asks. “Is that, what human love is?”

“No. I’m not sure whether trolls experience feelings differently to humans, but in my understanding it’s not the same. But then, only John has been both a human and a troll. Only he would know.” Rose’s voice trails off, leaving _and he’s the one who made the comparison_ unspoken.

“Skip ahead,” says Jade and no one argues with her.

* * *

> Tripel: Tend to wounds.

You don’t need to tend to your wounds. They will tend to themselves before you break out the bandages. This part is the worst, feeling the pain and waiting for your body to heal. Remembering so well what hurt you. Malicious claws and hands and teeth trying to pull the flesh off your bones.

Your kismesis really hates you now. You don’t know what to do about it.

> Tripel: Talk to lusus.

Your lusus is still silent in his cocoon. You’re hopeful, though. Two days ago you thought you saw him moving.

You place your hand over the outline of his body and cry a little to yourself like you are fucking six sweeps old. You’re almost ten sweeps too old for this kind of childish behaviour.

As you usually do when you are in a bad mood, you decided to MESSAGE JOHN.

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

TC: gu3SS what  
TC: nothing  
TC: lif3 iS hard and r3lationShipS ar3 complicat3d  
TC: n3wSfuckingflaSh, kiSm3S3S ar3 ov3rrat3d  
TC: t3ll your fri3ndS  
AA: trip, what happened?  
TC: itS mor3 of th3 Sam3  
TC: im Sorry for burd3ning you with it  
TC: i f33l w3ak aS Shit  
TC: and john im only t3lling you thiS no pow3rStruggl3S with m3 ok  
AA: you can trust me.  
AA: i couldn’t struggle my way out of a plastic bag.  
TC: hahaha!!!  
TC: you ar3 w3ird aS Shit you know that  
AA: yeah.  
AA: so this is about you and dull?  
TC: i r3ally think Sh3S trying to kill m3, john  
AA: oh man.  
TC: y3ah  
TC: i m3an i can tak3 it but i dont think thiS iS good for h3r  
TC: and you know Som3thing iS wrong with your blackrom r3lationShip wh3n your3 worri3d about your3 partn3r  
AA: do you think it might not be working out for you?  
TC: Shit i dont know  
TC: w3ll yeS i do  
TC: itS not  
TC: itS r3ally not john  
TC: i dont know what to do  
AA: hey, shh, it’s all right.  
AA: man i wish i could hug you right now!  
TC: hahaha!!!  
TC: m3 too  
TC: i juSt...  
TC: i kind of g3t what Sh3S going through, you know???  
TC: my luSuS iS abS3nt too  
TC: itS not th3 Sam3, but i f33l...  
AA: yeah? i’m listening to you trip.  
TC: Sympath3tic  
AA: oh.  
TC: i dont m3an iv3 flipp3d quadrantS!!!  
TC: i don’t f33l fluSh3d for h3r. i dont f33l fluSh3d for anyon3 right now  
AA: you just don’t have the heart to hate her.  
TC: y3S  
TC: itS Sham3ful  
AA: no, hey, it’s all right.  
AA: the heart goes where it wants.  
AA: but trip  
AA: if the relationship isn’t working for you, you need to end it.  
TC: john i cant  
AA: it’d be one thing if we were talking about a moirallegiance, but you can’t stay with a kismesis you don’t feel that way for.  
AA: it’s abusive.  
TC: ...  
TC: itS w3ak aS h3ll to Say  
TC: but i think itS juSt too hard  
AA: i understand.  
TC: Sh3S going through a bad tim3  
TC: i dont want to hurt h3r  
TC: thatS th3 probl3m  
TC: i r3ally don’t  
AA: okay trip.  
AA: it’s okay.  
TC: can you com3 ov3r???  
AA: yeah, i can do that.  
TC: x x x

* * *

“What an asshole,” says Karkat as they watch John hugging a crying troll girl. “He’s not even seven sweeps and he’s already filled one of his quadrants.”

“Two,” Kanaya corrects him. “He has a matesprit.”

Sollux turns to her. “What? I never thaw that.”

“Apparently he has feelings of matespritship. It is common knowledge among his friends that he will not reciprocate any flushed feelings. His conversations with this girl in particular, Ternio, suggest that he is already in a committed relationship.”

“I’ve never seen him going on dates or anything like that. He just talks a lot with those three trolls.” Jade tries to puzzle it out.

Dave smirks in Karkat’s direction, thoroughly confusing Tavros who is sitting just in front of him. “I think it’s pretty clear who it is.”

“So you share my suspicions. I’ll admit I am surprised you could pick up on the subtle displays of redrom interest between John and the fish killer.”

Karkat chokes on his drink and Terezi pats him exuberantly on the back. “Oh hell no. There is no way that strife-craving twerp could be John’s matesprit.”

“If that’s true that’s pretty sad. Fish killer already said he was in love with someone else,” sighs Jade.

“Does the difference in age mean anything in troll culture?” Rose asks.

“Not really. Highbloods age much more slowly than lowbloods and may live centuries longer. It would not make sense to have qualms about that, when a highblood is still expected to give material to the drones every sweep. If their quadrantmates die then they must replace them.” Kanaya looks over the trolls in the room. “It’s not socially acceptable for an adult to engage in intercourse with a wiggler or child, but the feelings may be there for them to fill a quadrant fully on the younger’s maturity. In John’s case the age difference would only be inhibiting in that fish killer is expected to engage in conquest, so they might not see each other in time to fill pails when it is necessary.”

“Kanaya, I’m sure the humans appreciate the information, but I am trying to keep my drink down here and it’s difficult when you’re talking so nonchalantly about either embarrassing or depressing things,” Karkat tells her plainly.

She inclines her head. “Of course. I’m sorry, Karkat.”

“I still don’t get why you get all twisted up at the mention of buckets,” Dave says idly. “We don’t go red in the face every time someone says the word condom.”

“I guess the obvious, uhh, difference, would be that you throw that, away. We keep our pails in our hives or even modi, until the drones come,” Tavros tries to explain it.

“We are also not yet old enough to fill pails, so we’re somewhat shy about it,” adds Kanaya.

Dave appears to accept this just as Sollux gasps at something on the screen. John is leaning in and very deliberately kissing the troll girl on the cheek. She stares at him and then puts her face on his shoulder, hugging him more tightly.

“I now declare you troll married,” Dave intones, waving his hand in the air like a cardinal.

Terezi laughs and cracks him over the head at the same time.

“What just happened?” asks Jade.

“They have officially agreed to enter into a moirallegiance,” Rose tells her, then, “Karkat, are those tears?”

Karkat says something that makes pretty much no sense to anyone present and goes off to find Gamzee. Presumably to reaffirm their pale feelings for each other and hug until one or both of them passes out.

Dave decides he’ll stick with the concupiscent quadrants if he ever ventures properly into the messy world of troll romance.

* * *

TC: dulciS  
TC: i n33d to talk to you  
TC: r3ply to thiS m3SSag3 wh3n you g3t it  
TC: pl3aS3

AA: hey, i was just wondering if i could come visit you sometime soon.  
AA: i haven’t seen you in a while.  
AA: i was remembering sweeps ago when you tried to teach me to play that instrument.  
AA: it was so fun!  
AA: maybe we could pick up those lessons again?  
AA: hehe  
AA: well, ill talk to you when you’re online.  
AA: :)

GA: How are you today, Dulcis?

TC: S3riouSly  
TC: i know youv3 S33n my m3SSag3S  
TC: juSt r3ply alr3ady  
TC: i r3ally n33d to talk to you

TC: if you dont r3ply to m3 right now, ill Say what i hav3 to ov3r trollian  
TC: im not 3v3n kidding

AA: hi dull.  
AA: i don’t want to meddle but trip says she’s been trying to contact you.  
AA: are you okay?  
AA: if anything’s wrong, you know you can message me.  
AA: okay, well, i hope you’re all right!

TC: i cant do thiS anymor3  
TC: i cant b3 your kiSm3SiS  
TC: im So Sorry  
TC: my f33lingS hav3 chang3d  
TC: johnS right, i Shouldnt b3 in a blackrom with Som3on3 i dont hat3  
TC: oh Shit  
TC: Sorry, i know you dont lik3 m3 to m3ntion him  
TC: but  
TC: y3ah  
TC: pl3aS3 troll m3 back  
TC: i might not b3 your kiSm3SiS anymor3, but i Still car3 about you  
TC: a lot. So im r3ally Sorry.  
TC: im r3ally r3ally Sorry  
TC: fuck, i am So bad at this

GA: Dulcis, I know you have read this and My Earlier message.  
GA: Immediately stop being Difficult and reply.  
GA: You are causing me Undue concern.  
AC: i - a m - s o r r y |  
GA: That’s Quite Alright.  
GA: Please be more Conscious of My feelings in future.  
AC: y e s |  
GA: Would you feel Comfortable telling me what is wrong?  
GA: I cannot think that you neglected your Social obligations without Any Specific and Possibly Trying reason.  
AC: i - a m - j u s t - t i r e d |  
GA: We are both Aware that is a crock of shit.  
GA: Please dignify this conversation between moirails with truthfulness.  
AC: y e s |  
GA: Before you attempt to do so, I will tell you there is no need to apologise.  
AC: . . . |  
AC: i - h a v e - b e e n - m i s s i n g - l a d y - m a r y |  
AC: s h e - w a s - a - d e a r - f r i e n d - a n d - l u s u s |  
AC: w i t h o u t - h e r - i - d o n t - k n o w - w h a t - t o - d o |  
GA: Ah.  
GA: Rather than mourning her absence, perhaps it would be Better to celebrate the sweeps you shared?  
AC: i t - i s - h a r d - t o - d o - a n y t h i n g - b u t - c r y |  
GA: Oh Dulcis.  
AC: i - c a n t - b r i n g - m y s e l f - t o - P r a c t i c e - w i t h o u t - h e r |  
AC: t h e - m u s i c - j u s t - s o u n d s - s a d |  
GA: Her death was Tragic and Untimely.  
GA: But you need to live without her.  
AC: i - a m - n o t - s u r e - t h a t - i - c a n |  
GA: Dulcis, you are not Alone. You have Always had me with you.  
AC: y o u - a r e - v e r y - i m P o r t a n t - t o - m e |  
GA: You are Important to me as well.  
GA: That is why I wish you would bring your grief to me, so we could discuss it.  
AC: y e s |  
GA: I will remind you that Any apology is Completely Unnecessary.  
AC: y e s |  
AC: t h a n k - y o u |  
GA: I hope I am someone you could rely on, Dulcis.  
AC: o f - c o u r s e |  
AC: i - h a v e - j u s t - b e e n - s o - d i s t r a c t e d - b y - l a d y - m a r y s - a b s e n c e |  
AC: a s - w e l l - a s - t r i p e l - t e l l i n g - m e - s h e - n o - l o n g e r - h a t e s - m e |  
AC: i t - f e e l s - l i k e - t h i n g s - a r e - d i s a P P e a r i n g |  
GA: She what?  
GA: Has Ternio tried to call off your relationship?  
AC: i t - w a s n t - a - s u r P r i s e |  
AC: i - c o u l d - t e l l - t h a t - m y - h a t e - w a s - o n e s i d e d |  
GA: But how could she have done this to you?  
GA: When you are Clearly in an Unfortunate situation?  
AC: r e a l l y |  
AC: i t s - o k a y | i t - d o e s n t - m a t t e r |  
GA: I disagree.  
GA: I knew she was Insensitive, but this is Unprecedentedly Cruel.  
GA: I will go now. I think she and I ought to have a talk.

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] has gone offline --

AC: P l e a s e - d o n t |  
AC: l i r o |  
AC: i - r e a l l y - c a n t - b e - s a t i s f i e d - w i t h - t h i s |

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

AC: j o h n |  
AA: hi!  
AA: it’s good to hear from you!  
AC: i - a m - f i n e |  
AC: i s - t r i P e l - w i t h - y o u |  
AA: that’s great.  
AA: uhh, no, she isn’t.  
AA: are you trying to talk to her?  
AC: n o |  
AC: i - w a n t - t o - w a r n - h e r |  
AA: what?  
AC: l i r o - i s - a n - o v e r P r o t e c t i v e - m o i r a i l |  
AC: h e s - g o i n g - t o - c o n f r o n t - h e r |  
AA: oh  
AA: well, that’s okay. liro isn’t a bad guy and trip can take care of herself.  
AC: j o h n - y o u - a r e - r i d i c u l o u s |  
AC: h e - m i g h t - n o t - a c t - l i k e - i t - b u t - h e - i s - a - v i o l e t - b l o o d |  
AA: oh shit yeah  
AC: i - a m - o n l y - d o i n g - t h i s - b e c a u s e - i - d o n t - w a n t - t r i P e l - t o - d i e |  
AC: a n d - a s - s e l f i s h - a s - i t - m i g h t - a P P e a r - i - a m - n o t - g o i n g - t o - d o - a n y t h i n g - m o r e |  
AA: all right.  
AA: i’ll message you later to let you know what happens.  
AC: o k a y |  
AC: a n d - j o h n |  
AA: yeah? i’m kind of in a hurry now, dull. i’m going offline in a second.  
AC: d o n t - g e t - h u r t |  
AA: :)

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] ceased trolling acapellaControvert [AC] \--

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] has gone offline --

* * *

You run along the outskirts of the forest until you get to the tracked ground that marks where Trip lives. Liro is already there and they’re arguing, not seeming to notice the growls and shrieks coming out from the trees. The beasts know Trip but they aren’t afraid to attack if she stands still there long enough. You glance around worriedly and go over to your friends.

“How could you do it? How could you make her feel more alone when she is already so vulnerable?” Liro half-shouts at her. His hands are tightly fisted and his fins are flaring.

Trip is calm, even a little annoyed that he’s harassing her. “It wasn’t working out.”

“That hardly matters!”

“I think it does,” she says stubbornly.

There’s a low rumbling coming from Liro but Trip isn’t intimidated by it in the slightest. John wonders if she doesn’t realise what it means. Keeping mostly away from other trolls might mean she hasn’t learned some important body language. “You are insufferable! Why did I think speaking with a lowblood was a reasonable idea?”

“I don’t know, but I wish you hadn’t. You’re bringing the wrong kind of attention to me here.” Trip sighs and that’s what sets Liro off.

His growling deepens and you can feel a prickling in your skin in response. Before he can lunge at her or say anything that might make her lunge at him, you run forward, waving your arms peaceably around. “Hey! Hey hey hey! Hey guys!”

“John...” Trip looks like she tears up a little. Damn, she is really sensitive over this new moirallegiance the two of you have.

Liro is stiff when he addresses you. “Hello. You may not have realised it, but I was about to teach this lowblood a lesson in decency. I will forgive you for interfering as long as you move aside.”

“Sorry, yeah, no, I’m not going to do that.” You grin really, really hesitantly because there is no part of you that thinks facing down a vengeful violet blood is a good idea.

The rumbling gets louder and he bares his teeth at you.

“Hold on. Really. Uh, Trip, can you say you’re sorry? Sincerely, please.”

“What? John, I’m not going to do that. All of this is between Dulcis and me. He doesn’t need to get involved at all.”

“Trip, _please?_ ” 

She just blinks at you like she has no idea why you could be freaking out right now.

“Liro, don’t you think she could have a point. I-” You break off when he angles his horns towards you and have to start again. “Uh, I think that it is their relationship-”

“When Dulcis is in mourning,” Liro snarls and takes a step forward, “crying and unable to play her beautiful music, _that’s_ when she chooses to break it off?”

“That’s exactly why I did it! Moping around like that, it’s pathetic-”

Liro pushes forward and you step between them so that he’s pressed against your shoulder with Trip behind you and out of reach. “If you feel that way then why did you do it?” he shouts at the same time as you fumblingly pat his arm and say “Hey, it’s okay”.

“I saw her like that and I pitied her! In any case, I can’t hate her the way I did. Not right now. Maybe when she’s gotten over her lusus and is back to the confident, pretentious Dulcis I resented so much.” Trip, for some reason which is quite beyond you, has circled around so you have to move to keep yourself between them.

For a moment Liro settles and then his anger flares up again. “She doesn’t deserve your pity! The pity of a lowblood, how ridiculous! I barely tolerated your hatred for each other. Without that, I have no reason to tolerate you at all. MOVE, JOHN.”

Damn. Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn. You are so dead. You are so about to die. Wow, Trip better appreciate this when you’re all torn apart and getting eaten by forest monsters.

“Don’t you dare touch John! Take your fucking prejudice back to the ocean, you prick!”

“MOVE. Or I will hurt you, John. This is a matter of pride! I absolutely CANNOT allow a LOWBLOOD to be treating me in this disdainful way!”

“If you hurt him I will fuck your shit up so badly, fin-face.”

“How motherfucking ELOQUENT. What a testament you must be to all brown bloods. I can just imagine that colour soaking into the ground here. I bet NO ONE will be able to see it. Just like DIRT. DISGUSTING.”

So dead, so dead, so dead, so dead. But better you than Trip. You really hope she holds it together after you’re savagely disembowelled and doesn’t try to attack Liro in an act of misdirected heroism. 

“STOP!” You shout. “LIRO! Think. I am here because Dulcis told me you were coming for Trip. She doesn’t want her dead. Think! Trip doesn’t hate Dulcis, that’s why she ended things. She cares about her. THAT’S why she ended things! And please, she’s my moirail. I don’t want to see her hurt any more than you do Dulcis.”

You speak over your shoulder, more quietly now. “Trip. Oh my god. Stop making him angrier. That’s putting me in more danger than me standing here in the first place.”

She makes a noise in the back of her throat.

After a tense minute Liro pushes off you and takes a step back. “I will leave her alone,” you breathe a sigh of relief, “if I can strike her once.”

“What?”

“I require retribution. It will be enough to see her bleed.”

Trip sounds almost resigned when she says, “Yeah, okay.”

You look at her, your eyes huge. She just waves at you which you think might be a sign of _I’ll explain it to you later_.

“No,” you tell him.

“This is all I am asking, John. It is more than reasonable given the offense.”

“No. No way. Absolutely not-”

He moves into a threatening stance and, overcome with fear and concern and anger, you roar at him, loud enough for the forest to go silent for a minute afterwards. It doesn’t seem to shake him and he comes towards Trip, as if expecting you to move out of the way.

You don’t.

Instead you lower your head so that your horns are directed towards him. You oddly feel them make contact before you hear him gasp and smell the blood they’ve drawn. They’re pushed aside, by hands you think, and you bring them back to pierce into him again, even as his claws rip into your chest and you feel the most wrenching pain imaginable.

All of this has taken seconds. When you’ve fallen backwards you see that you scraped along Liro’s cheek and neck. There’s an indent along one of his horns which you’re proud to see that you made. You’re glad you didn’t seriously hurt him. Really, you never meant to.

Trip’s head is over you and yeah, she’s crying. Her hands press at the sides of your head with grim resolve. You watch with detached interest as her psionic ability pulses out and over you. When it’s faded she sits you up and you don’t know how you manage to do it since you’re still pretty convinced you’re dying.

You and Trip and Liro sit together on the dirt at the edge of the forest.

The three of you are silent until he speaks. “I may have been acting rashly.”

“You killed John,” Trip says with just a hint of accusation.

“That’s okay,” you say. You still have no idea exactly what is happening, but it feels like a good thing, so you sit between them and don’t flinch when Trip fumbles for your hand, coated in blood and dirt. You’re not even surprised when a moment later Liro takes your other one. You just sit there together and regret the little things that have brought each of you here.

* * *

“That’s three quadrants. He’s become an auspistice to those two,” Rose notes.

Jade crosses her arms on the back of an empty chair in front of her. “Doesn’t that mean fish killer isn’t his matesprit?”

“Yes. While it is possible to flip quadrants, they did not act like they had that sort of relationship,” Kanaya agrees.

“I wonder who it could be...”

“ _How_ it could be might be a better question.” Rose directs a sideways look at Karkat.

“Ternio’s psionics are quite remarkable. It is uncommon to have an ability like that and may account for the location of her hive.”

“What do you mean?”

“She meanth the Condethce letth lowbloodth live becauthe their powerth are utheful. That troll would be put on a ship and thent into war immediately, probably under the mental control of other conthcripted pthionicth. Tho sheth gone into hiding.” Sollux shrugs.

“Even though the girl is underage?”

“She has neither the blood status nor lifespan to be reasonably left until maturity.”

“I understand the practicality, but it strikes me as unnecessarily cruel,” says Rose after a moment of thought.

Kanaya nods with something of a pained expression.


	6. Inactive

You are a young troll of about FOUR OR FIVE SWEEPS. Recently your friend has been teaching you how to play an ancient Alternian instrument called a WINDYBIND. You are not very good at it, because at this time in your life you are a little bit flushed for her. Fortunately for you, you are too shy to tell her and she is too interested in upholding the integrity of music to have noticed.

Today after practice she has taken you to the back of her hive, to show you her APPLEFRUIT ORCHARD. You like it a lot and are inconveniently up a tree when you get a message from an UNKNOWN TROLLTAG.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

CG: JOHN.  
AA: hello.  
AA: who are you?  
CG: OH THANK FUCK.  
CG: THANK THE FUCKING FIREFLIES STUCK IN THE SKY OF YOUR STUPID WINDY PLANET.  
CG: LET’S SEE HOW MUCH WE CAN FUCK THIS CONVERSATION UP, NOW, HMM?  
CG: DOES THAT SOUND LIKE A FUCKING GOOD IDEA TO YOU?  
AA: um  
AA: i don’t mind if you swear dude, but you used fuck in every sentence just now.  
CG: I DON’T GIVE A FUCK.  
AA: hehe, okay.  
CG: YOU KNOW THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT.  
AA: ?  
CG: YOU JUST HAD TO SAY THAT AND MAKE THIS A REALITY WHERE IF I DIDN’T TALK TO YOU MORE THAN ONCE I WOULD DOOM THIS WHOLE TIMELINE.  
CG: THAT WAS SELFISH, JOHN, AND I WISH I COULD HATE YOU FOR IT.  
AA: well i don’t know who you are.   
AA: but i'm glad you don't. too many people hate me already.  
CG: OH I SEE, YOU’RE BOASTING NOW.  
CG: YES, THAT IS CLEARLY THE RIGHT APPROACH TO TAKE WHEN SOMEONE IS BEING ANGRY IN YOUR DIRECTION.  
CG: I DON’T KNOW HOW I COULD EVEN HAVE THOUGHT OTHERWISE. JOHN EGBERT, YOU HAVE DONE IT AGAIN. A FUCKING HANDFUL OF GOLD STARS TO YOU.  
AA: i guess it could have sounded like i was boasting.  
AA: but really it just sucks because i don’t hate anyone.  
AA: rejecting people isn’t fun at all.  
CG: AT LEAST YOU HAVE PEOPLE TO REJECT, YOU UNGRATEFUL NOOKSTAIN.  
AA: look, who are you?  
CG: YOUR MATESPRIT, APPARENTLY.  
CG: FUCKING *SURPRISE*.  
AA: oh shit  
AA: who gave you my trolltag?  
CG: NO ONE GAVE IT TO ME.   
AA: look, i don’t know who you are.  
AA: but i already have someone i’m flushed for.  
AA: aside from her, i’m not interested in finding a matesprit at the moment.  
CG: ARE YOU REFERRING TO THE WOULD-BE MARYAM-LALONDE WHO COULD DESTROY WORLDS WITH THAT RACKET SHE CALLS MUSIC?  
AA: i’m pretty sure some of what you just said aren’t real words  
AA: and i don’t think it’s any of your business.  
AA: look, i’m only four and a half sweeps old.  
AA: it’s not okay for you to be messaging me about shit like this.  
CG: JOHN.  
CG: BREAKING NEWS.  
CG: WHEN YOU TRY TO GET DOWN FROM THAT TREE WE BOTH KNOW YOU’RE IN, BE CAREFUL OF THAT LAST BRANCH. THE ONE POKING OUT, THAT FOR SOME REASON FUTURE YOU THINKS LOOKS REMOTELY SUPPORTIVE ENOUGH FOR YOUR WEIGHT.  
CG: IT ISN’T AND YOU’LL FALL.  
AA: how do you know i’m here??

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

You are so confused by this weird conversation that when you get to the bottom of the tree you put all your weight on a bad branch and fall, thus fulfilling the STRANGER’S PROPHECY. It has the surprisingly far-reaching consequence of causing your arm to bruise and for the next week’s practice to be postponed.

When you come to practice at the new time there is a DREADFUL STORM which, through a series of events of comic value you might otherwise appreciate, sends you literally flying off the roof. Your friends thenceforth call you WINDY KID, a nickname that annoys you but you also think is kind of cool.

The lessons stop out of your friend’s concern for your safety. After some time apart your feelings for her become only platonic.

* * *

Confusingly, you are now another troll at the same point in time. You are SEVEN SWEEPS OLD and happen to be friends with the troll you just were. You are oblivious to the misfortune your friend is experiencing and are presently preoccupied with poking at a scuttlebeast repeatedly in an effort to alleviate your mind-crushing boredom.

You take sadistic delight when it snaps furiously at you and crush another of its legs, so that it can amusingly walk only in a circle.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: hey fish killer

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: rude

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: ive basically got a god client over here  
TG: thats never going to work

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: i told you dog  
GA: I do not know why you would think to bother me, but if you do not cease Immediately I can assure you there will be Imminent and Deadly repercussions.  
TG: you just block me without listening to what i have to tell you  
GA: Why wouldn’t I block a message from an Unknown sender who I have no interest in indulging?  
TG: doesnt this go against your gentlemans code or something  
GA: Why would I want to be Gentlemanly?  
TG: cause its kind of your thing dude  
TG: in my world youd have a fancy hat and open doors for ladies  
TG: who would probably be weirded out to be honest but it wouldnt stop you tipping your hat and bowing to grandmas and saying things like spiffing and top hole  
GA: In My world I am an authority, a fact of which I hope you are Aware.  
GA: If your Prolonged contact with me is Truly Necessary, then state your Alleged business.  
GA: If it is not, and you are making the Grave mistake of wasting My time, then I will have you pursued, mounted on a wall with breath still in your lungs and My own claws drawn along Every one of your muscles. You will scream with the Agony of a rust blood on marching day, of one who Deeply regrets the incident of his own birth so Few Useless sweeps before. I will make you suffer the Cruelest acts a violet blood is Capable of without the promise of a pail at the end of it. Your conviction that annoying me was at all Worthwhile will die as you do.  
TG: maybe if i was a rust blood that would have scared me  
TG: but im just sitting here watching you mess with that crab like its funnier than judge judy is ironic  
GA: Are you surveilling me?  
TG: yeah this is the shit you should find out before threatening people  
TG: i dont even know dude  
TG: i dont even know if i feel like helping you  
GA: Well, if your cause for conversation is so Easily Abandoned, then I am Quite Happy for this exchange to end.

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: calm down  
TG: jegus  
GA: You are speaking More nonsense.  
GA: I am Inclined to block you again.  
TG: no man dont do that  
TG: its annoying as fuck  
TG: and damn when things annoy me i just want to make long winded death rants at them  
TG: kinda wanting to scratch that psychopathic itch right now in fact  
GA: State your blood colour.  
TG: redder than rust you racist tool

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: if you pull this bullshit one more time  
TG: i will go all caps on you  
TG: i swear to your troll queen whose name i always forget  
GA: Why would I even bother to listen to a mutant blood?  
TG: well pretty obvious reason staring you in the face right now  
TG: im not going to leave you alone  
TG: and im an alien you massive douche  
TG: all of us have blood that colour  
GA: I will admit that is an Intriguing declaration.  
GA: Provide me with evidence.  
TG: coming right up fish killer  
TG: [thisisme.jpg](http://www.mspaintadventures.com/storyfiles/hs2/scraps/humanchildisdave.jpg)  
TG: i bet this would pass in a court of law on either of our planets  
TG: its terezi approved and nothing gets past her keen blind eyes  
GA: This is Sufficient for me to Momentarily suspend My disbelief.  
GA: What is your business with me?  
TG: before i get into that interesting plot relevant information  
TG: im just gonna tell you dude that crab is not going to die any slower if you keep fucking up its legs like that  
TG: god damn it is this kind of shit which makes me glad im not a troll  
TG: looks like you deserved the name fish killer way before we even gave it to you  
GA: I will Reasonably assume that by ‘crab’ you mean ‘scuttlebeast’.  
TG: yeah whatever that thing  
TG: not only is this shit not cool but its also pretty stupid  
TG: i mean these scuttlebeasts are just saving up their watery vengeance for you man  
TG: every one you kill their spirit goes out to the big one  
GA: All you are saying is lies.  
TG: no im for real here  
TG: Resider of the Watery Depths  
TG: Deceptively Calm Motherfucker they call it  
TG: i dont even want to type its name but i guess i have to because youre a disbelieving fuck  
TG: i just hope it doesnt send its little crabby minions out to where i am so they climb all uncomfortably under my clothes and shit  
TG: its fucking coming dude  
TG: get ready for this  
TG: ...  
TG: Wdjk’fodlp  
GA: Why would an alien warn me about a monster on My own planet?  
TG: just think for a second here  
TG: maybe that huge demon crab destroyed my home  
TG: and its come here and im just trying to save your sorry disbelieving ass  
TG: yeah man youre right to pull away from that little crab there  
TG: its probably a spy  
GA: If you are Right about this, then I ought to express My gratitude.  
TG: dont worry about it  
TG: it just feels good to know im saving lives  
GA: Well.  
GA: I apologise for My Earlier brusqueness.  
GA: I am a Curious example of My kind in that I Deliberately suppress My Bloodthirsty inclinations. At times this is Trying and puts me in an Admittedly Poor temper.  
TG: what  
TG: youre a pacifist  
GA: Yes, I imagine this is some surprise to you.  
GA: I am not Sure I want to explain My Behavioural abnormalities to you at the moment.  
GA: With that scuttlebeast Fortunately Gone from My hive, I have little to distract me from My Natural desire to slaughter things Mindlessly.  
GA: I suppose conversing with you will limit My boredom.  
TG: yeah ok  
TG: im just gonna go on like you didnt drop that fat man on me  
TG: warning you about the dangerous vengeful sea monster hiding in the depths probably near your house wasnt all i messaged you to do  
TG: i want to scope out the situation with john  
GA: The highblood?  
TG: yeah john  
TG: egderp, heir of breath, windy kid, whatever you want to call him  
GA: What is a Windy kid?  
TG: oh haha yeah that is totally a thing  
TG: you enjoy that one later  
TG: ill even let you say you came up with it  
GA: Thank you, I suppose.  
TG: no problem  
TG: whats going on with john?  
TG: i hear he has a matesprit  
GA: That is a crock of shit.  
GA: Jontha is Only four sweeps old. It would be Foolish of him to enter into a matespritship at this Tender age. It implies dependence on the Other blood colours and would be Dangerous for the partner in question when he goes through his Early maturation. I expect it will occur Close to the Next perigee, on the basis of My own experience.  
TG: wow you actually call him jontha  
TG: its a stupid sounding name  
GA: It is his name nonetheless. To call someone by something Other than their Real name is Quite Irresponsible.  
TG: you know i think you were more uptight at this age  
TG: probably johns influence he kind of does that to people  
TG: so he isnt getting any red action right now?  
GA: No. Though I will warn you against entertaining Any interest in him. I would have My claws Deep into your chest cavity before you even got Close to him.  
TG: i dont like you  
TG: but ill admit i do respect you  
GA: I would be Flattered, but I am not Certain how Sincere an alien’s words could be.  
TG: i told you about the Pincered One and you doubt my sincerity  
GA: Well, I am Very Grateful for that.  
GA: Perhaps I am too Suspicious of you. I apologise Duly.  
TG: no hard feelings here  
TG: thanks for the low down on john  
TG: ill check up on you guys from time to time  
TG: make sure to keep watch for scuttlebeasts  
TG: when it attacked my planet there was no warning  
TG: this is serious shit  
GA: I will be Careful.  
GA: Thank you for your assistance.  
TG: youre welcome  
TG: well talk again later then  
GA: Is that possible for you?  
TG: oh man  
TG: you dont even know the shenanigans going on here  
TG: the other aliens dont even know  
TG: its just going to be our little secret ok  
TG: i dont know who would listen to the fish killer anyway  
GA: Your words are Grating and Largely Nonsensical.  
TG: whatever

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

You immediately dismiss the conversation you just had with a BENEVOLENT but PROBABLY INSANE ALIEN and look around your hive for anything else to entertain you. Just to be safe, you close all the windows and check for any scuttlebeast spies that may be hiding in wait.

You wonder if those were STIRRINGS OF HATRED that you just felt. You have never had a caliginous romance before and aren’t sure if this is what it is meant to be like. But it’s true that you could never be with a red blood, alien or no. It would be a disgrace to Alternian nobility and you could do so much better than that.

You don’t quite believe him when he says that he will contact you again. But a little part of you hopes.

* * *

Even more confusingly, you are now a different troll at a different point in time to the other two trolls that you just were. You are in their future, your present and your observers’ past. It is too difficult to think about exactly when you are, so you decide to get straight into it like the self-motivated girl you have always been and go into your APPLEFRUIT ORCHARD.

While you recovered from your PAINFUL INJURIES at your friend’s hive, the trees have repaired the damage done to them. There are scratches along the trunks of the foremost, etched into the wood by your LUSUS’ wild and desperate talons. You think one day you might be able to touch them, trace the last thing your lusus left you with your fingers, but today you walk stiffly through the orchard, careful not to get too close to anything at all here.

The APPLEFRUIT LIQUIDS have BURNED your skin. Your cheek is dotted with scars and your left arm has healed over with puffed, web-like tissue. If you had not taken off your cardigan the damage would have been minimal. Unfortunately what has been done cannot be undone. These are the wise words of Alternian darling, Troll Lance Bass. You hold them close to your heart as you wander underneath the rustling leaves of the applefruit trees.

You see that though much of the fruit has fallen, there are THREE YELLOW APPLEFRUITS hanging close together. You realise that they are not really yellow, but sort of a GOLDEN colour. This seems INSIGNIFICANT to you right now. You don’t want to think about the fruit. You don’t want to look at it. It reminds you of the two relationships you have lost, which you had celebrated just a short time ago.

Just as you are about to turn away, a BOY floats out from behind a tree. You stare at him. As always, his eyes are closed and so he does not see you.

Wind rustles the leaves and one lightly touches your skin, freaking you the fuck out. The boy doesn’t notice. He floats up to the tree with the golden applefruit and reaches out an arm to them. You watch as his eyes flutter and slowly begin to open.

Before they can he SUDDENLY DISAPPEARS.

To be honest, you are not really surprised. It is this sort of NARRATIVE TENSION which you have come to expect from your life. It would be nice if your questions could be answered, say, by some sort of omnipresent being. But you know not to expect anything that RIDICULOUS and SELF-INDULGENT.

* * *

It seems you have caught me. Alright, yes, I’ll do everything you say. I’ll come out with my hands up. What? This _is_ up. You can hardly tell me it’s down. Yes, well, I don’t really want to have a silly argument like this. Up, down, and all sorts of other nonsense when what we’re really dying to get to is the _exposition._

Yes, the exposition. I suppose that lovely, glimmering term has caught your interest. Well I can’t say that I’m surprised. It’s a writer’s bread and slowly, carefully applied butter, a reader’s oasis in the desert, a publisher’s tool of trade and a reality TV watcher’s neglected pet that they put outside twice a day and usually remember to give water. 

In a story like this, it’s what we really want. It’s what we’re waiting for. What happened to Dulcis’ lusus? Does John’s trolltag mean anything? Why is there a picture of Karkat on John’s wall? What’s going on with these time shenanigans? I could answer all of these questions for you, and that would be exposition, a lovely, beautiful thing that we really do want and quite probably deserve.

But instead I’m just going to back over to this doorway while I’m speaking and at just the right moment _try to make a run for it-_

Okay. You caught me. Is there really any need for violence amongst friends? Yes, we’re friends. What did you think? That I let myself get caught by just anyone? Ha! Haha! You wound me. Not literally of course. Ha! Hahaha!

I’m feeling a little uncomfortable here. But alright. I’ll go on.

The first bit of exposition I will give you, is that _Lady Mary de Wing didn’t die of anyone’s particular interference._ Oh, this feels so indulgent, just telling you this. Like taking your shoes off at the end of a long day. Lady Mary’s death was an accident. It’s sad for Dulcis but things like this do happen. Every year on Alternia trolls are orphaned and left to fend for themselves. Comment if you have a heart.

Just let me...no, I’m not trying to escape again. I’m just wiping a tear from my eye. See? Yes, well, it’s a tear. It’s pretty small to begin with, you can’t blame me for that.

Well. The second bit of exposition I will give you is about Trip. As we all hopefully remember, she’s about nine sweeps older than John and Dulcis and six sweeps older than Liro. None of them know or even suspect this. Before she was friends with these guys, _she had others,_ including the highblood she refers to in [Chapter Four](http://archiveofourown.org/works/721395/chapters/1429437). At that time her lusus wasn’t in his cocoon either and Trip was a normal young troll.

There are certain things I never cleared up about the meteor and everyone watching John. Through Rose’s modified Trollian client they’re able to listen to his conversations and read his chat logs when his screen is in view. Screen-ception, if you will! What? Yes I did think that was funny. Yes, I know the film came out a while ago. It’s still relevant. When are dreams not relevant? If you’re thinking things like that, then you shouldn’t be in the Homestuck part of the internet. Go back to Wikipedia and leave our fancifulness alone.

But don’t leave me here. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it. Come back and I’ll give you a fresh glass of apple juice.

So, with John, the people on the meteor don’t know everything about what he’s doing. They can still be surprised. Considering that they regularly skip ahead through his timeline, it would be surprising if they weren’t surprised. Even Karkat gets surprised and he’s studied John’s life _twice._

That leads my wandering mind back to time shenanigans. I am absolutely not going to tell you anything about that, no. Like any writer, I will only be selectively useful. What I will say instead is that _the machine on the meteor chose John and Gamzee randomly._ There could theoretically be alternative timelines in which the other humans were trollified. 

Yes, well, I don’t care if that is or is not a word. If Shakespeare can bump I can trollify. It’s all in the name of linguistic advancement. I’m just a cavalryman in the war of modernity, pushing ever forward to breach the defences of traditionalism and sense. On each of my stallion’s hooves I have inscripted ‘adjective’, ‘verb’, ‘noun’ and ‘miscellaneous’, so even the ground may be impressed by my semantical knowledge as we race together towards the noble end of entitled illiteracy-

Alright, there’s no need for that. I’ll stop getting caught up in flawed metaphorical representations of myself and start expositioning. You can put that…whatever _that_ is, down. Sit there and drink your apple juice and I’ll go on.

Where was I? Shoosh, I wasn’t really asking you. Of course I know. I said that for dramatic effect.

The machine could have chosen the others and created an entirely new and similarly entertaining scenario. But it didn’t. If you wanted to see anything like that, you would need something that could view alternate timelines omnisciently. Some kind of god client. But what am I talking about, ha ha, silly me. Please don’t pay any mind as I take off my jumper and drape it over that monitor there. It’s really nothing. Really, absolutely nothing. If it was anything, it would be something you didn’t want to see, like pictures of my mother, or pornography.

Oh? You’re not going to ask me about it? Well. Yes, uh, good then. Exactly what I wanted. Back to the expositioning.

Hmm? No, I really meant it when I said there was nothing under there. It’s okay. You don’t need to show it any kind of polite interest.

Hey, don’t lift that up!

You’ve caught me again. I am obviously a useless fugitive. 

There is a client on that computer there that is neither Trollian nor Pesterchum. A client which allows me to view every character at every point in time, even the points which are in my chronological future. I call it Titanium. That is a very clever name for it, though you won’t fully grasp its cleverness until further into your chronology. I know because I have used the client.

Hang on a second, please. I’ve got a message.

Ah.

How interesting.

I think you should go now. No need to thank me for all that exposition I just gave you. Go on now, get back to the story. All sorts of things are happening, you can’t be sitting here and drinking all my apple juice and listening to me. Mind the stallion. He’s prone to biting.

* * *

Half a sweep passes before you receive another message from your ALIEN SAVIOUR.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: fish killer  
GA: I did not expect to hear from you again.  
TG: ive messaged you before huh  
TG: i should take this there then  
GA: As Usual, I do not understand what you are talking about.  
TG: shenanigans  
GA: You keep saying that word.  
TG: hey do me a favour and dont tell me what ive said to you in the past  
TG: times kind of my business  
TG: i have to deal with all these loops in the real world its hard work  
TG: when i go online its like coming home throwing off my jacket and shoes and putting my feet on the table you know  
GA: I wonder Occasionally if it is a typing quirk that prevents you from making Any sense, or if you are Truly this Radically Nonsensical.  
GA: I pity those who have to Regularly associate with you.  
TG: dude you basically just told me you think about me  
TG: was confessing your infatuation really what you wanted to do there  
TG: cause if so im going to have to break your black murderous heart  
GA: I suppose I should not divulge what has happened in our Past conversation.  
TG: well played  
TG: ill talk to you then and also sometime soon  
TG: dont wait up

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

You go on with your life. You are enjoying the beginning of what you expect will be a beautiful moirallegiance when you are messaged again.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: hey fish killer  
GA: You again.  
TG: looks like im out of time with you  
TG: i just pulled a vantas which is now totally a thing  
GA: I appreciate the assistance you have given me, but Kindly leave me alone.  
GA: Your pestering is Irritating at the Best of times. You fail to make Any sort of sense.  
TG: whoa hey dont tell me what weve talked about  
TG: i dont want any self fulfilling prophecies getting started here  
TG: i just watched karkat get caught up in a bunch of them  
TG: like hes a lady ready to lose her matespirit virginity and theyre his petticoats  
GA: Shut up.  
TG: dude ill tell you now i will be trolling you for sweeps to come  
TG: might as well just sit tight buckle up and go along with it

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: thats not going to work  
GA: I know.  
TG: youve blocked me before?  
TG: rude  
GA: Hardly.  
TG: all right ill go back and start up this acquaintance  
TG: i just wanna ask first though if john has a matesprit yet  
GA: That is Still none of your business.  
TG: is that a yes  
GA: No.  
TG: cool

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

This time when the conversation is over you immediately message your friend John.

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

GA: I feel I ought to inform you that an Unfamiliar trolltag has contacted me with a Blatant and Frankly Concerning interest in you.  
GA: Specifically, your redrom availability.  
AA: oh really?  
AA: that’s weird.  
GA: That is an Impressive understatement.  
AA: well there’s not that much i can do.  
AA: was it a gray text guy who swears a lot?  
GA: No.  
GA: Have you been Similarly contacted?  
AA: hehe, it’s nothing.  
GA: John. You should be more self-Aware.  
GA: You are a highblood and as such will experience both Untoward interest and attempts on your life.  
AA: i think that’s exaggerating it a little liro.  
GA: Who is to say your accident at Dulcis’ hive was not an Organised assault on you, planned and orchestrated by her Jealous midblood neighbours?  
AA: you are the only one who thinks that.  
AA: it was just the wind, liro. really.  
GA: Well I am Unconvinced.  
GA: Who is this person that has contacted you?  
AA: it was just once about a sweep ago.  
AA: he said he was my matesprit.  
AA: i’m pretty sure trip just gave someone my trolltag to troll me.  
AA: it hasn’t happened since then.  
GA: John, I have been contacted three times in the last sweep.  
GA: Furthermore, I get the Distinct impression that time means nothing to that person.  
GA: He appears to be Capable of manipulating it, perhaps through the use of the god client he Dubiously claims to possess.  
AA: i don’t know about all of that, but i don’t think its anything to worry about.  
AA: the guy was a jerk but he’s left me alone so it’s okay.  
GA: I will keep Alert watch on your behalf, John.  
GA: Your Youthful innocence is Worthy of defense.  
AA: thanks, i guess!  
GA: I am considering sending you copies of My interactions with the individual.  
AA: uh, sure! go ahead and do that!  
GA: aliensaviour123.txt  
AA: wow...  
AA: is this why you’re so afraid of scuttlebeasts?  
AA: i’m pretty sure it’s all bullshit.  
GA: I will Presently confide in you, John, that I have seen Wdjk’fodlp.  
GA: Just its Vast, Deadened eyes, but that is Quite Enough.  
AA: oh, okay.  
AA: what is a vantas?  
GA: There is a lowblood with that name in Dulcis’ lawnring. It is possible that trolls other than Solely us have been Anonymously contacted.  
AA: should we talk to this guy?  
GA: John I Expressly forbid you from communicating with the lowbloods. It is already too much that you frequent Ternio’s Undesirable company. If you engage this Other lowblood I will consider it a Direct offense against the Condesce and Personally drain your blue blood from your body. I am Entirely Serious.  
AA: all right. i wasn’t going to try to make friends with him though, i just thought it might be smart to ask some questions.  
GA: John you insist on attempting to befriend everyone you meet. Monsters appear the Only exception.  
AA: hahaha! i guess that’s true!  
GA: It is Certainly True and not as Amusing as you seem to find it.  
AA: :)  
GA: Yes.  
GA: Now send me a copy of the conversation you had.  
AA: sorry  
AA: can you wait a second? i’m getting another message.  
GA: I will be as Patient as My blood will permit.  
AA: thanks!

* * *

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

CG: JOHN.

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] blocked carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] has gone offline --

You lean back against the wall of your hive and hope that Liro will let you apologise for leaving the conversation without saying anything. From the transcripts that he gave you, it looks like just blocking this guy won’t work.

You’re sitting cross-legged on the balcony across from SALAMANDAD’S TOWER. None of its windows face the hive and there’s no way for you to get up there with your young troll body. Your claws aren’t sharp enough to dig into the thick walls or strong enough to support your weight. It’s too far to jump with nothing to hold onto if you could do that anyway. Sometimes you sit here and think about how you could get inside and see what he keeps in there.

He is always taking treasures into his tower, holding glimmering things between his blunt teeth and using the tactile webbing on his hands and feet to silently scale the walls. He doesn’t mind you watching but ignores you if you call to him. He’s never showed you any of the treasures before he hides them away. You want to know everything about Salamandad and it hurts sometimes that he won’t let you.

You stand up and breathe out loudly, exaggeratedly. Salamandad flits out of the tower at the sound. It was your warning that you are about to run forward and try to jump the divide.

You fall.

He easily catches you. Salamandad blows a bubble on your head in parental indulgence and scurries back up and into the tower.


	7. Active

TC: i juSt think  
TC: wh3n your luSuS paSS3d it chang3d 3v3rything for uS  
AC: y o u r e - r i g h t |  
TC: i dont know if i Should Say thiS...  
AC: P l e a s e - g o - a h e a d |  
TC: ok w3ll  
TC: at that tim3  
TC: i r3ally got th3 f33ling  
TC: that it waSnt juSt m3 that you hat3d  
TC: that you hat3d yourS3lf  
AC: a h |  
TC: and that mad3 m3 f33l Sorry for you  
TC: i think thatS wh3n it Start3d going wrong for uS  
AC: y e s |  
AC: i t s - t r u e - t h a t - i - b l a m e d - m y s e l f - f o r - l a d y - m a r y s - d e a t h |  
TC: but it waSnt your fault!!!  
AC: i - u n d e r s t a n d - t h a t - n o w |  
AC: b u t - a t - t h a t - t i m e - i - w a s - c o n v i n c e d - t h a t - i - c o u l d - h a v e - d o n e - s o m e t h i n g - t o - P r e v e n t - i t |  
AC: e v e n - w h e n - i - s t o P P e d - t h i n k i n g - t h a t - w a y - i - s t i l l - f e l t - r e s P o n s i b l e |  
AC: l i k e - i t - w a s - a - P u n i s h m e n t - s o m e h o w |  
TC: you hav3nt don3 anything wrong, dulciS  
AC: t h a n k - y o u |  
AC: i t s - h a r d - t o - e x p l a i n - b u t - i t - m e a n s - a - l o t - t o - h e a r - t h a t |  
TC: :)  
AC: :)  
TC: can w3 b3 fri3ndS now???  
TC: i miSS3d you a lot  
AC: w e - b o t h - k n o w - t h a t s - a - l i e |  
AC: y o u v e - b e e n - t o o - d i s t r a c t e d - b y - y o u r - c o n c i l i a t o r y - r e l a t i o n s h i P s |  
AC: y e s - i - w o u l d - l i k e - t o - b e - f r i e n d s - a g a i n - t r i P e l |  
TC: you know what i juSt r3aliS3d???  
TC: no on3 in our group iS g3tting laid 3v3r  
TC: hahaha  
AC: i t - s e e m s - t h a t - w a y |  
TC: i m3an john SayS h3 haS a mat3Sprit but iv3 n3v3r S33n th3 guy  
TC: wh3n3v3r h3 StartS to talk about him h3 StopS himS3lf  
AC: i t s - c u r i o u s |  
AC: j o h n - i s - n o r m a l l y - v e r y - o P e n |  
TC: y3ah  
TC: i Sw3ar im going to figur3 it out on3 day  
TC: oh actually im g3tting troll3d by him  
TC: iS it ok if i tak3 thiS???  
AC: g o - r i g h t - a h e a d |  
AC: i - m i g h t - m e s s a g e - m y - o w n - m o i r a i l |  
TC: gr3at!!! :)  
AC: :)

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] ceased trolling acapellaControvert [AC] \--

* * *

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] began trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

AA: hey trip!  
AA: are you there?  
TC: i waS juSt talking to dulciS  
TC: Sh3 Said Sh3 wantS uS to b3 fri3ndS again!!!  
AA: that’s great!  
AA: i’m so happy for you guys.  
TC: y3ah  
TC: i f33l So r3li3v3d  
TC: thiS whol3 thing waS r3ally Str3SSing m3 out  
AA: well the worst is over now.  
AA: any breakup is hard. i think.  
AA: it’s great you guys could go back to being friends.  
AA: you were always really close and it’d be a shame to lose that.  
AA: ...  
AA: uh, trip, are you there?  
TC: Sorry john i thought i Saw Som3thing  
AA: what?

* * *

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

AC: g o o d - a f t e r n o o n |  
GA: Good afternoon, Dulcis!  
GA: It is a pleasure to hear from you.  
AC: h o w - a r e - y o u |  
GA: You have caught me in Very Good spirits! And yourself?  
AC: i - h a v e - b e e n - t a l k i n g - t o - t r i P e l |  
AC: P l e a s e - d o n t - g e t - u P s e t - a b o u t - i t |  
AC: i t - w e n t - w e l l - a n d - i - a m - f e e l i n g - q u i t e - r e l i e v e d |  
GA: I suppose I can forgive it if she was Appropriately Respectful to you. Do not think that you owe that lowblood anything. She is below you and you need not show her kindness or weigh your feelings against her Erratic behaviours.  
AC: s h e - w a s - c o n s i d e r a t e - a n d - w e - h a v e - a g r e e d - t o - b e - f r i e n d s |  
AC: a s - m u c h - a s - i - c a r e - a b o u t - y o u - i - w i l l - n o t - c o m P r o m i s e - o n - t h i s |  
GA: I have Always admired your tenacity.  
GA: Very well, I will not interfere with your decision.  
AC: t h a n k - y o u |  
GA: That is Quite Alright.  
AC: w h a t - a r e - y o u - d o i n g - a t - t h e - m o m e n t |  
GA: Presently I am going to feed my lusus. Fortunately there is no sign of that Thoroughly Dislikeable Ampora who I Ordinarily have to deal with.  
AC: t h a t - i s - w o n d e r f u l |  
GA: Yes, I shou  
AC: h a s - s o m e t h i n g - h a P P e n e d |  
AC: y o u - a r e - n o t - r e s P o n d i n g |  
AC: l i r o d e |

* * *

TC: i thought th3 cocoon waS moving  
TC: but itS Still now  
TC: i w3nt ov3r and ch3ck3d but i gu3SS i imagin3d it  
AA: i'm sure he’ll wake up someday.  
TC: y3ah i think So too  
TC: oh Shit!!!  
AA: trip?  
TC: OH SHIT JOHN!!!  
AA: is everything okay??  
AA: did the drones find you?!  
TC: NO NO NO!!!  
TC: JOHN H3S WAKING UP!!!

* * *

AC: l i r o d e - i - a m - v e r y - c o n c e r n e d |  
GA: FUCK  
GA: FUCK NO  
GA: THIS IS NOT HAPPENING i am not watching this happen NO  
AC: w h a t - a r e - y o u - t a l k i n g - a b o u t |  
AC: l i r o d e - w h a t s - h a P P e n i n g |  
GA: condesces wrath SHIT WHY THE FUCK AM I SEEING THIS dulcis DULCIS MAKE IT FUCKING STOP  
GA: this isnt meant to happen NOT ME why would this happen to me HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN i am going to fucking MURDER everyone WHO DID THIS who is to blame I WILL KILL THEM AND ANYONE ELSE WHO KNEW THIS WAS POSSIBLE  
GA: this shouldnt be possible WHO WOULD DO THIS i want to hurt them NO WHY IS HE LIKE THAT  
GA: SHIT STOP IT  
GA: STOP IT PLEASE  
GA: I AM A VIOLET BLOOD THIS CANT BE HAPPENING TO ME  
GA: i thought we were safe  
GA: why is he dying  
AC: l i r o d e |  
AC: t e l l - m e |  
AC: w h o - i s - d y i n g |  
GA: my lusus  
GA: has  
GA: a  
GA: harpoon  
GA: IN HIM

* * *

AA: trip that’s amazing!  
TC: john i wiSh you w3r3 S33ing this!!!  
TC: the cocoon is br3aking op3n...now h3S coming out...  
TC: that caSing iS tough i hop3 h3 do3Snt hurt himS3lf  
TC: cond3Sc3S Shining trid3nt i am So 3xcit3d right now john!!!  
AA: oh wow trip.  
AA: it’s great that you’re telling me about this.  
TC: JOHN!!!  
TC: I CAN S33 WHIT3!!!  
TC: hiS h3ad iS Sticking out  
TC: h3S lik3 a big crawl3r wiggl3r h3S not Sur3 what to do  
TC: com3 to m3 b3autiful!!!  
TC: com3 h3r3!!!  
AA: aww!  
TC: h3S halfway out now  
TC: hold on a minut3 im going to go h3lp him  
AA: okay!  
AA: i’ll be waiting here for you.

* * *

GA: hes bleeding HES DYING make it FUCKING stop  
GA: i will KILL whoever did this I WILL HURT THEM  
AC: c a n - y o u - r e m o v e - t h e - w e a P o n |  
AC: m a y b e - h e - i s - n o t - m o r t a l l y - w o u n d e d |  
GA: HES DEAD DULCIS  
GA: HES DEAD ILL KILL THEM  
GA: IM FOLLOWING THE HARPOON LINE SOME SICK DIRTBLOODED MOTHERFUCKER IS DRAGGING HIM WITH IT  
AC: l i r o d e - y o u - t o l d - m e - o n c e - t h a t - y o u - c a n t - b r i n g - t h e m - b a c k |  
GA: ILL FUCKING AVENGE HIM its the least i can do I OWE HIM SO MUCH he was mine MY LUSUS that harpoon BLOOD death DIE  
AC: i - d o - n o t - t h i n k - y o u - s h o u l d - d o - t h i s |  
GA: DULCIS I HAV  
AC: i - d o - n o t - w a n t - y o u - t o - d o - t h i s |  
GA: dulcis  
GA: this isnt the same this wasnt an accident he was murdered  
AC: i t - i s - t h e - s a m e |  
GA: oh f  
GA: IT WAS AMPORA  
GA: IT WAS A FUCKING VIOLET BLOOD DULCIS  
GA: JUST LIKE ME

* * *

TC: you wont b3li3v3 thiS  
TC: h3 iS th3 b3St  
TC: i waS right, h3 iS th3 b3St luSuS  
AA: :)  
TC: h3 haS wingS!!!  
AA: are you serious??  
AA: wow, trip, wow.  
AA: that’s amazing.  
AA: that is so amazing.  
TC: y3p, h3 haS four of th3m  
TC: Six l3gS, big 3y3s and hiS f33l3rS ar3 So Soft!!!  
TC: h3S So cut3!!! you hav3 to com3 S33 him!!!  
AA: do you want to get him settled first?  
AA: i can come by tomorrow.  
TC: no, itS ok  
TC: nothingS chang3d h3r3 Sinc3 h3 w3nt into th3 cocoon and h3 S33mS to r3m3mb3r 3v3rything  
TC: h3 r3m3mb3rS m3!!!  
TC: i waS worri3d, itS b33n Such a long tim3...  
AA: i bet he was more worried you’d forgotten about him!  
AA: you were only two sweeps old when he started his pupation.  
TC: hahaha you ar3 So clu3l3SS john  
TC: thatS anoth3r thing w3 Should talk about wh3n you g3t h3r3  
AA: okay?  
AA: i’ll just say goodbye to salamandad.  
TC: iv3 got to t3ll dulciS and wat3r boy  
AA: see you soon!  
TC: :)

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] ceased trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

* * *

GA: WERE KILLERS  
GA: SO I HAVE TO KILL HIM  
AC: i f - y o u - d o - t h a t - i - w i l l - b e - i n c r e d i b l y - a n g r y |  
AC: i - m i g h t - n o t - e v e r - f o r g i v e - y o u |  
GA: hes dragging him under the water dulcis  
GA: hes going to feed him to the heirs lusus  
GA: how can you let me let that happen  
AC: i t - i s - n o t - y o u r - P l a c e |  
GA:  
AC: m a y b e - y o u - c a n - s e e - n o w - h o w - d a n g e r o u s - y o u - a r e |  
AC: h o w - d a n g e r o u s - h e - i s |  
GA: i cant let him be this way  
AC: y o u - a r e - n o t - t h e - c o n d e s c e - o r - t h e - h e i r |  
AC: y o u - a r e - n o t - t h e - h i g h e s t - b l o o d |  
AC: u n l e s s - y o u - h a v e - f o r g o t t e n - a m P o r a - i s - s e r v i n g - t h e - h e i r |  
AC: t h i s - i s - b e y o n d - y o u r - P o w e r - t o - c h a n g e |  
AC: i - a m - h e a r t b r o k e n - f o r - y o u |  
GA:  
GA:  
GA: Yes.  
GA: I think you are Right.  
AC: g o - b a c k - t o - y o u r - h i v e - P l e a s e |  
AC: i - w i l l - c o m e - a n d - s e e - y o u |

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] ceased trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

* * *

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] began trolling acapellaControvert [AC] \--

TC: gu3SS whoS3 luSuS juSt cam3 out of hiS cocoon finally!!!  
TC: you Said it wouldnt happ3n but it did!!!  
TC: com3 ov3r to my hiv3 and m33t him  
TC: h3 iS th3 b3St!!!

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] is now idle --

AC: i f - y o u - h a v e - m e s s a g e d - l i r o d e - s i m i l a r l y - P l e a s e - s t o p - i m m e d i a t e l y |  
AC: h e - a n d - i - w i l l - b e - b u s y - f o r - t h e - n e x t - l i t t l e - w h i l e |  
AC: i - a m - h a P P y - i - w a s - w r o n g - t r i P e l |  
AC: i - w i l l - c o m e - t o - s e e - y o u r - l u s u s - w h e n - i - c a n |  
TC: did Som3thing happ3n???  
AC: y e s - a n d - i t - i s - v e r y - s e r i o u s |  
AC: i l l - t a l k - t o - y o u - l a t e r |

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] ceased trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

* * *

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

AC: j o h n |  
AC: i - n e e d - y o u r - h e l P |

* * *

Enter name.

Your name is CALLAT TARAHA. You are a YELLOW BLOODED TROLL without any interests or hobbies THAT YOU LET PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT. 

In a cruel twist of fate, your lusus is a STALKERBEAST. She DEEPLY RESENTS your PRIZED STALKERBEAST TAIL, a trophy you brought out with you from the brooding caverns SIX SWEEPS ago and display on your FAVOURITE WALL. When she is particularly annoyed at you, which is pretty regularly, you have to go out into the brush yourself and FORAGE FOR FOOD. By which you mean STEAL IT FROM OTHERS’ HIVES UNDER COVER OF DAY. When your lusus is out, which is most of the time, you like to PRACTICE STEALTHINESS. You play a game with yourself, seeing how long you can go without making a sound. You trounce yourself shamefully every time and have a record of thirty-nine hours of complete silentness. You would boast about it to your friends, except you are NOT THAT SORT OF TROLL. Also you DON’T HAVE ANY FRIENDS.

Your trolltag is absentContrectator, and you speak in a careful... almost hesitant... sort’ve way...

What will you do?

> Callat: Put on coolkid shades.

You put on your LIGHTFIGHTERS. They are kind of ridiculously effective, so when you wear them inside, like now, you can’t see anything at all. They are also quite fashionable, but you don’t know anyone who could have told you that and also don’t give a shit about fashion. If you KNEW WHAT IT WAS, you would wonder why anyone would deliberately call attention to themselves. You would conclude that fashion is the ENEMY OF STEALTHINESS and give it a SEVEN OUT OF TEN RISKINESS ASSESSMENT RATING.

Wearing your lightfighters in your hive like this has a THREE OUT OF TEN RISKINESS ASSESSMENT RATING. You re-captchalogue them in your INVISIBLE SYLLADEX. Only you are able to retrieve your belongings because only you know where the menu is. It is the pinnacle of modus security.

> Callat: Look around hive.

You don’t need to do that for two reasons: you have SPATIALLY MEMORISED your hive and the placement of everything in it, and your hive is PRACTICALLY EMPTY. Aside from your favourite wall, there is nothing here to suggest that you even have a personality. You silently pride yourself on this.

It is in direct defiance of any thieves who would foolishly try to break into your hive. You store practically everything that you own in your sylladex to keep it from hypothetical burglars and your lusus’ destructive tendencies. Only you know how many things you have in there. It’s a question no one’s asking and that you’ll never answer.

> Callat: Examine contents of drawer.

You are UNCIVILISED and do not have a WEAPONS DRAWER. You don’t even know what a drawer is, and if you did, you would wonder why anyone stores their weapons in them.

> Callat: Examine weapons.

You have a RANGE OF DIFFERENT WEAPONS but you only ever have reason to use your trusted DIGITBLADE. It has accompanied you on every one of your HEISTS since you STOLE IT three sweeps ago from an unguarded hive. It is about the size of your hand, but when all of its digits are fully extended it is even taller than you. Some of these digits are very useful to you, like the HARDCUTTERS, MIRROR and GRAPPLING HOOK. Others are silly, like the MOBILE LINE. You have absolutely no use for that and have considered at different times cutting it off and using it to set a small trap outside your hive door.

> Callat: HEIST.

You equip your digitblade with your strife deck, put on your lightfighters, button your cuffs and coat up all the way to your neck, make sure your laces are firmly tied, check that your BELTBLADE isn’t in danger of cutting your waist and jump up, gripping onto the ceiling with the expert use of your sharpened claws and digitblade functions.

Then you go out of the window and, using the grappling hook on your digitblade, rappel down the side of your POINTLESSLY TALL HIVE to the small patch of land you have not covered in TRAPS. When you are on the ground you take off quickly, running into the shade of the forest more silently than a troll should probably be capable of. You don’t know that trolls are loud and violent beings. You pride yourself on being neither of those things, so if you were to find this out you would probably stop calling yourself a troll.

You EXPERTLY EVADE the monsters that live in the forest, STEP EASILY away from the sunlight shining through the canopy, BREATHING EVENLY as you RUN FASTER than a hoofbeast on shoeing day.

Eventually you get to where the forest will no longer protect you from the FIERY RAYS of the ALTERNIAN SUN. It’s not bright enough for you to cover your face and your lightfighters will prevent you from going blind, but you stop to take a breath, like every time, and run out into the rock field between the forest and the lawnring you are targeting this season.

You run, completely calm – panicking has a NINE OUT OF TEN RISKINESS ASSESSMENT RATING – until you are able to take shelter in the shadow of a hive. You stay there for only moments before you run again, around and past and occasionally through hives that you’ve already stolen from. When you reach the ones you haven’t, you are surprised when your INSTINCT tells you that none of them are right for today. You trust your instinct like nothing else, and go out of the lawnring and toward the ocean.

You have never stolen from highbloods before. You have never considered yourself quite good enough. But when you near the hive between beach, field and forest you get that feeling that this is the right hive. You are going to steal the shit out of this hive. The highblood sleeping in there is going to have his shit stolen. It is going to be the best.

There are TOWERS on either side of it. The whole damn thing is covered in balconies and bridges. Whoever built it has NO COMPREHENSION OF THE IMPORTANCE OF SECURITY and you begin to think of this heist as a lesson to them.

One of the towers is obviously more challenging, with only a small window right at the top and no discernible way of getting to it from the main body of the hive. You decide to climb it first. With a faint click one of the digits of your digitblade pops out and you press a sequence of buttons, telling it the parameters of the structure you are looking at.

A wire, thin as a hair and harder to see, flies out the end and around the tower. You catch it, tug, and attach it to a loop on your coat. With the wire and the digitblade held tightly in each of your hands, you walk up the building, the wire loosing accordingly, until you are standing on it horizontally. Then you walk up the tower, planning to call the wire back when you’re hanging off the window. That’s before a flash of white comes out of it and trips you.

Thinking quickly, you call back the wire and dig the claws of one hand into the tower. It’s obvious they won’t support you, but you’ve already pulled out both the grappling hook, which you send over to the main building – admittedly not as quietly as you would have liked – and the metal claw digits which you dig into the building as deeply as you can. For a moment you’re just hanging there. Then you hoist yourself up, ready to jump over with the help of the grappling hook if you’re assaulted again.

You’re not and when you reach the window you find a lizard lusus wearing a hat and looking approvingly at you. It blows a bubble which pops on your fingers. You stare at it with wide eyes until it comes over and makes some glubbing noise and tries to pull you up.

With its help you roll out onto the floor of the tower block, which you notice immediately is FULL OF TREASURES. They are arranged in orderly piles; artworks, wires, assorted weapons, sand dollars, children’s toys, berries, bark strips, shells and what you FAIL TO RECOGNISE as orchestranomaphone keys and strings. You are confused as shit by this block and the lusus that has settled it. Before you can panic regardless of the risk assessment rating you had previously given the action, the lusus blows two bubbles at you, pushes you to sit in a pile of plush toys and hands you a FRESH FLYINGBEAST CARCASS. 

You get the impression that he was going to give this to the troll in his care. You are simultaneously FLATTERED and SLIGHTLY DISGUSTED by the gift. When you captchalogue it he bares his teeth at you oddly. You think that might be a thing that lusii do.

There is a brief moment of silence where he is apparently contented and you are pretty fucking confused. Then you stand up and gesture at the window. It’s not stealing if someone watches you do it so there’s not much point in you being here.

He pushes you to sit again.

You stand up.

He pushes you down.

You shrug.

He bares his teeth.

When he’s apparently convinced you’re not just going to dive out the window, he lets you walk around the block looking at the things that he has collected. You kneel down beside the berries and take one, rolling it around on your fingers. He watches as you carefully pierce the skin and spread some juice on the webbing between your thumb and forefinger. It itches so you put the berry down and try to find something else to eat. He bares his teeth at you. You’re recognising that as a good thing.

You know from experience that the bark strips are too hard to digest to be worthwhile, so you leave them. You’re considering the brightly coloured bags of candy pushed away behind the artworks when the lusus flicks his tail.

You look at him.

He lifts his chin at you.

You shrug.

He pops another bubble and goes out the window. You follow him because you just agreed to. The two of you have pretty quickly established a silent language, which relies on the gesturing of various body parts and the weird stuff he can do with his mouth. You realise that this is the longest you have ever spent communicating with someone other than your lusus.

Go figure it’s another troll’s lusus.

> Callat: Enjoy hospitality.

That’s not hard to do because you decide you FUCKING LOVE CAKE. It is the best thing you have ever experienced with your tongue. Why the fuck are you eating berries and fish when you could be having this sugary confection? It is surely the number one best tasting food ever, and you give it a TEN OUT OF TEN DELICIOUSNESS ASSESSMENT RATING.

The lusus is pleased you like the food he has given you and doesn’t seem to care a whit that you don’t know how to use cutlery. He lets you cut it into bits with your digitblade and put them into your mouth with both of your hands. Your face becomes covered with what you FAIL TO RECOGNISE as cream and icing. If you knew what they were called, you would make a concerted effort to steal them from hives in the immediate future.

But not this one because you and this lusus are chill.

> Callat: Get caught.

Your face and collar are covered messily in those things you don’t know the names of when the highblood who probably built and lives in this hive walks in.

You wipe at your mouth with one hand and draw your digitblade with the other.

The lusus makes some chattering noise you didn’t expect from him.

The highblood stares at you and then starts laughing.

It’s not the reaction you expected and it’s pretty far from the reaction you want. This is the first troll you’ve interacted with since you were in the brooding caverns. You don’t understand why he’s laughing at you. All you get is that he’s breathing erratically in your direction and baring his teeth and that’s the thing you like on the lusus, not this weird highblood kid with asymmetrical horns and eyes that have no right to be bluer than the ocean. Oceans are blue, eyes aren’t blue. His wrongness makes you angry.

So you jump at him.

He ducks out of the way.

You jump at him again.

He breathes weirdly some more and ducks out of the way.

You make to jump, go around him instead and slash his arm with your knife.

When he sees his own blood he goes feral and snarls at you. You’re filled with adrenaline when he rushes at you, horns first, and you duck underneath him, rounding him again and slashing his shoulder.

The lusus clicks wildly at you both and then seems to give up, going over to clean up the cake.

The highblood turns, roars at you, and it’s strangely familiar. You like the sound. You want him to make it again. It gets your heart beating almost too fast. Makes you remember all the great heists you’ve pulled, all your successes, everything you did to survive on your own. You feel clever and quick and worthy. You feel like a threat.

You’re completely silent as you strife and that infuriates him. His lunges are strong and sometimes you can barely dodge them fast enough. When the cake is cleaned up, his shirt and arm are blue with his blood and you’ve been fighting for a while, he gets sharper. He thinks before he strikes out at you. You get hit heavily in the side but he still hasn’t drawn blood.

You realise he doesn’t care if you’re bleeding or not, just if you’re hurt, when he has the sense to pull out his weapon – the gaudiest hammer you’ve ever had the misfortune to see. You would tell him that, taunt him a bit, but it clearly bothers him that he can’t even hear you breathing.

He roars again and it is the opposite of cake but also somehow the best thing ever. It’s intense being this close to another troll, strifing with your own kind. You’re overwhelmed emotionally by the time he overwhelms you physically. And then he’s pushed up against you to keep you in place and feels really warm and that’s another thing you want more of, just warmth, because you don’t think you’ve ever had that given to you before. You always had to make it for yourself.

So you push close and then he’s bleeding on you and your mouths are touching – you FAIL TO RECOGNISE that you are KISSING, and if you knew what kissing was you would be surprised that it is a thing trolls do – and he tastes like blood and you taste like cake and you move your hands up into his hair and drag your knife along his horn, because fuck if he isn’t going to remember you. And he makes some weird sounds in a language you don’t speak and claws at your shoulder and then licks at the yellow blood there and makes an angry sound at you. So you grab his head and hit it against the table and run away and when you are almost to the forest you realise you’re doing that breathing thing he did that pissed you off so much.

* * *

The laboratory is quieter than usual. Jade and Tavros are sitting close and talking about how sad it is that fish killer’s lusus was killed by some douche called Eridan. Beside them Dave and Terezi are discussing the cave chick’s lusus – affectionate, winged and creepy as fuck – and what they would change about it to make it the best. All they can agree on is that it was worth the cave chick waiting four sweeps. And that it was pretty damn unfair that she had to.

On the right of the two screens in front of them, Troll John is doing bubble runs with Salamandad so that music girl, who doesn’t have gills or superior lung capacity, can be with fish killer in his time of need. It’s disorienting to watch him swim back and forth over and over again and uncomfortable when music girl and fish killer start kissing, so they’ve turned the sound off and everyone on the meteor is trying to pretend that they’re really doing something else, talking to each other or fiddling with wires or writing in books.

It almost goes unnoticed when John, in what had seemed a fairly normal day at his hive, walks in to find Salamandad giving a fashionable if unruly troll cake. Fortunately Dave always has one eye open for his friends in romantic situations and gets them all avidly watching the screen with a few choice words.

They’re even throwing around a bit of fake dialogue for the fight scene when it suddenly changes into something else. None of the trolls are really surprised, but Jade jerks with shock and nearly falls out of her chair. For ironic purposes, Dave actually does. He gapes up at the screen from the floor with Terezi patting his shoulder and giggling.

Then the troll they had dubbed ‘new guy’ runs off after trying to kill Troll John again, which seems to the humans like pretty misdirected gratitude after he’s eaten Troll John’s cake and they’ve kissed and stuff. And John wipes at his mouth with his thumb, sees the blood and cream on it, and deliberately sucks on it. 

And with that, hey look, it’s time for everyone to feel awkward, troll and human alike.

There’s a brief bit of silence before Dave mentions that Karkat might not have seen this yet. He goes out of the room with Terezi and Jade to find out if he has.

* * *

Karkat is at that moment in his respiteblock, about to message John for the fourth time in his chronology and the third time in John’s. On his small husktop screen he watches five and a half sweep old John sitting on the beach while his lusus collects shells.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

CG: PLEASE DON’T BLOCK ME.  
CG: OR WAIT A MINUTE BEFORE YOU DO.  
AA: wow, no ‘JOHN’.  
AA: ‘LISTEN TO ME JOHN BECAUSE I SPEAK IN ALL CAPS AND STALK YOU’.  
AA: ‘I AM AN AUTHORITY ON YOUR LIFE AND ALSO YOUR MATESPRIT SOMEHOW WHOA’.  
CG: I DON’T SOUND LIKE THAT AT ALL.  
AA: well you sound like that to me so maybe you have an idea now of what you’re doing wrong.  
AA: i mean the obvious thing is telling me you’re my matesprit like you’re slapping me in the face with sopor from my own recuperacoon.  
AA: i just don’t know how to react to that at all.  
AA: and while i’m trying to figure it out you just slap me again with some prophecy that came true.  
AA: is magic real?  
AA: magic’s real, isn’t it.  
CG: NO YOU NOOKWHIFFING MORON MAGIC IS THE NON-REALEST THING YOU CAN GET.  
CG: HORNED HOOFBEASTS AND HIGHBLOODS THAT SAY PLEASE ARE REALER THAN MAGIC.  
AA: this is what i’m talking about.  
AA: i don’t know who you are. i don’t know your name, what you like, what you hate, how old you are. where you live.  
AA: all that and the obvious stuff, like why you think we’re matesprits and how you know my trolltag and only try to message me once every half a sweep.  
AA: we’re not close enough that you can say this shit and it doesn’t mean anything.

He blinks at the screen uncomprehendingly.

It hits him for the first time that John doesn’t remember who he is. In a rare moment of empathy, Karkat imagines what it would be like if he’d gotten these messages when he was a kid. It would have freaked him out. He suddenly doesn’t know how he ever thought it was okay to talk to Troll John like this. Write that down as another huge fuck-up by his past self.

AA: i hope you not replying means you’re thinking about that.  
CG: YEAH.  
CG: IT’S HARD TO EXPLAIN.  
AA: you have to eventually.  
CG: THE JOHN THAT I KNOW, HE JUST LAUGHS THROUGH MY BULLSHIT.  
CG: WHEN WE MET UP HE JUST GRINNED HIS WAY THROUGH IT LIKE AN IDIOT.  
CG: SO I’VE BEEN TREATING YOU, LIKE MY JOHN.  
CG: I GUESS I’M SORRY ABOUT THAT.  
CG: OR WHATEVER.  
AA: ...  
AA: okay so  
AA: there’s more than one john. i am clearly one of these johns.  
AA: you were in a redrom with that john, but now there’s this john and you don’t know how to talk to him.  
AA: i mean me.  
CG: YOU’RE THE SAME JOHN.  
CG: THIS IS PROBABLY VERY CONFUSING TO YOU. I KNOW IT FUCKED WITH ME WHEN LALONDE TRIED TO EXPLAIN IT.  
AA: oh, okay, that makes things easier.  
AA: so i guess i, john, have become a different sort of person and have no memory of you.  
CG: I DON’T KNOW HOW YOU JUST ACCEPT THIS INFORMATION AND MOVE ON.  
AA: well i can’t change it by wishing really hard that it would, or denying it.  
AA: you’ve got to keep moving forward, otherwise things will get you down!  
AA: salamandad taught me that when he showed me how quicksand works.  
AA: it was kind of a flawed metaphor actually.  
CG: HOW INTERESTING.  
AA: aw man, you don’t need to pretend to be interested in what i’m saying.  
AA: it’s like i let a lot of your swearing and shoutiness go right over my head.  
AA: it’s more than okay for you to not find everything about my life as fun as i do.  
AA: but that doesn’t mean you get to insult me about it either.  
CG: ALL RIGHT. I JUST HOPE YOU REALISE I WOULD ONLY DO THIS FOR YOU, JOHN.

It’s an embarrassing thing to have said and Karkat regrets it almost immediately after it appears on the screen in gray. His cheeks are tinged red, but of course John can’t see that.

AA: wow!  
AA: if this is what you’re like as a matesprit i think i’m more okay with the whole idea.  
CG: WHAT?  
AA: hahaha!  
AA: gosh, i’m going blue!  
AA: but can we put all that aside for a while? i think there’s a lot more we need to talk about.  
CG: LALONDE WOULD HAVE MY HEAD IF SHE KNEW I WAS MESSAGING YOU.  
CG: I’D LIKE TO THINK SHE COULDN’T DO MUCH WORSE IF I TOLD YOU ABOUT EVERYTHING.  
AA: okay, so i’m john but a different john.  
AA: what was i like before?  
CG: YOU WERE A HUMAN, FOR ONE THING.  
AA: what’s that?  
CG: AN ALIEN WITH NUBBY FINGERS AND TEETH, THIN SKIN AND FRAGILE BONES.  
AA: that sounds terrible!  
CG: IT WAS EASY TO PITY YOU, WHEN YOU HURT SO EASILY.  
AA: you’re actually pretty romantic, i’m surprised.  
CG: THAT SHOULDN’T SURPRISE YOU. I AM AN EXPERT ON ROMANCE.  
AA: oh yeah?  
CG: YES, BUT WHEN YOU WERE A HUMAN YOU WOULD NEVER LISTEN TO ME OR LOOK AT MY DIAGRAMS.  
CG: THEY WERE PRETTY SHITTY BUT I WAS TRYING TO EXPRESS SOMETHING YOU HUMANS JUST COULDN’T GET THROUGH YOUR THINK PANS. IT WAS FUCKING IMPORTANT AND YOUR LEADER HAD MADE IT A PRIORITY, SO I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU COULDN’T JUST SIT DOWN AND BE RESPECTFUL FOR TWO FUCKING MINUTES. IT WAS SO HARD FOR YOU TO DO.  
AA: yeah i don’t know anything about that.  
AA: you said there were other humans?  
AA: are they trolls too?  
CG: NO, THEY’RE HERE ON THE METEOR WITH ME.  
CG: THEY’RE EVEN MORE ANNOYING WITHOUT YOU. COLOUR ME SURPRISED.  
AA: you’re all on a meteor?  
CG: OKAY, I’M GOING TO EXPLAIN IT TO YOU.  
CG: IT WILL MAKE ABOUT AS MUCH SENSE TO YOU AS IT DOES TO ALL OF US EXCEPT FOR LALONDE, WHICH IS ABSOLUTELY NONE AT ALL.  
AA: cool, thanks!  
CG: I WAS A TROLL LIVING ON ALTERNIA, WITH TROLL FRIENDS.  
CG: WE DID ALL YOUR TYPICAL TROLL ACTIVITIES, SUCH AS ROLEPLAY AND MAIM EACH OTHER.  
CG: ONE DAY WE GOT TOGETHER TO PLAY A GAME CALLED SGRUB, WHICH TURNED OUT TO BE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE BECAUSE IT ENDED UP DESTROYING ALTERNIA WITH METEORS.  
CG: RIGHT BEFORE THAT IT TRANSPORTED THE TWELVE OF US INTO ANOTHER WORLD AND A WHOLE BUNCH OF UNNECESSARY COMPLICATED SHIT HAPPENED.  
CG: BASICALLY AT THE END OF IT WE GOT TO CREATE ANOTHER UNIVERSE, WHERE WE WOULD BE GODS.  
CG: BUT WE MANAGED TO FUCK THAT UP THOROUGHLY AND DEPENDED ON FOUR OF THE ALIENS LIVING IN THE WORLD WE’D CREATED TO PLAY THE GAME THEMSELVES AND REDEEM US.  
CG: IT WAS DRAMATIC AS SHIT BUT IT HAPPENED A SWEEP AGO NOW AND I THINK WE’VE ALL KIND OF GOTTEN OVER IT.  
AA: it sounds like the title of a movie.  
AA: i’d watch it.  
CG: YOU’D WATCH ANYTHING.  
AA: haha, that’s true!  
CG: YEAH. ANYWAY THESE HUMANS WERE FRIENDS ON THEIR PLANET LIKE WE WERE ON OURS, EXCEPT THEY DIDN’T GO INSANE AND KILL EACH OTHER AS SOON AS THE SOPOR GOT TAKEN AWAY.  
CG: THERE’S A REALLY LONG EMOTIONAL STORY THERE AND I’D RATHER NOT GET INTO MY MISERABLE FAILURE RIGHT THIS SECOND.  
CG: WE COMMUNICATED WITH THE HUMANS, BUT WE WERE STUCK ON A METEOR AND COULDN’T DO ANYTHING BUT WATCH THEM ON OUR HUSKTOPS.  
CG: IT WAS NEEDLESSLY DIFFICULT BUT THE HUMANS JOINED US ON THE METEOR, AND NOW WE’RE SAILING THROUGH SPACE TOWARDS THE UNIVERSE THAT THEY CREATED.  
AA: and i was one of them?  
CG: YES. YOU WERE HERE UNTIL THREE DAYS AGO, WHEN YOU FOUGHT AGAINST A MACHINE AND LOST.  
CG: ALTHOUGH I SUPPOSE YOU COULD CONSIDER SENDING YOU THROUGH TIME AND SPACE TO GROW UP AS A TROLL ON OUR DEAD PLANET TECHNICALLY CHEATING.  
CG: IF YOU’D LISTENED TO ME NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED.  
AA: so all my memories of being a wiggler and growing up, they’re real?  
CG: YES. I’VE WATCHED MOST OF THEM SO I CAN TELL YOU PERSONALLY THAT YOUR UNEXPECTEDLY EVENTFUL TROLL CHILDHOOD HAS ACTUALLY HAPPENED AND YOU ARE REALLY ALIVE RIGHT NOW ON ALTERNIA WITH YOUR LUSUS. WHO IS ACTUALLY YOUR LUSUS, THOUGH YOU ALSO HAD ONE WHEN YOU WERE A HUMAN.  
AA: great, i was really worried about that.  
AA: so i get all of that. why have you been messaging me out of time?  
CG: THAT WAS YOUR FAULT.  
AA: huh?  
CG: YOU TOLD ME IN THE FUTURE, WHEN I FIRST TROLLED YOU, THAT I HAD SPOKEN TO YOU SEVERAL TIMES BEFORE.  
CG: IF I DIDN’T GO FURTHER BACK IN YOUR TIMELINE AND MESSAGE YOU IT WOULD HAVE CREATED A PARADOX AND DOOMED US ALL TO IMMINENT DEATH AND THE DREAM BUBBLES OF WRATHFUL GODS.  
AA: but what if i was lying?  
CG: YOU ARE JOHN EGBERT. YOU ARE GUILELESS AND INCAPABLE OF DECEPTION.  
AA: sounds like a human thing to me. i’m gonna tell you now i’m in possession of guiles.  
CG: YOU’RE JOKING.  
AA: joking’s just lying anyway dude. but nicer and everyone laughs together afterwards.  
AA: but i’m not joking right now.  
AA: so if i’m telling the truth it means i lie, and if i’m not telling the truth, it also means i lie.  
AA: i lie man, that’s a thing that i do.  
CG: SO YOU PLAYED ME.  
AA: i might have, but it seems like it would have been impossible for me to have been lying at that point after we’ve had these conversations.  
AA: which we had to have had, or we wouldn’t have the one where i send you back to have them.  
CG: I DON’T EVEN CARE. CAN WE JUST GET BACK TO THE COMPLEX AND IMPROBABLE REALITIES THAT I UNDERSTAND?  
AA: sure!  
AA: so you and human me were matesprits?  
CG: NO, WE WEREN’T.  
AA: oh.  
AA: so why did you tell me we were?  
CG: I DIDN’T SAY THAT. I SAID THAT WE ARE APPARENTLY MATESPRITS. TROLL JOHN AND I.  
CG: FUTURE YOU WAS...  
CG: HE JUST SAID WE WERE IN A RELATIONSHIP, OKAY?  
AA: so between then and now, unless i was lying, we become like that.  
CG: THAT SEEMS TO BE THE REALITY WE ARE FACED WITH.  
AA: yeah okay.  
AA: i don’t know how old you are but give me another sweep please.  
AA: im still climbing trees and working out what my shame globes do so it would be nice if you could wait for me to grow up a bit.  
CG: JEGUS CHRIST, JOHN.  
CG: IT’S LIKE YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU’RE SAYING. YOU’RE A TROLL NOW, I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT UNDERSTAND THESE THINGS.  
AA: i don’t get why we cant even mention it!  
AA: like pail is a bad word you only say when you’re in a committed relationship.  
AA: and if you try to figure out how your own body works you’re committing this huge unforgivable sin and you’ll have to sit with the lowbloods for the next season because they’re the only ones who’ll tolerate you.  
AA: it’s ridiculous! all that and it’s absolutely okay for me to be challenging other trolls to death duels and maiming and killing and whatever else you said.  
CG: YOU’RE A TROLL AND AN INDIGO BLOOD AT THAT,  
CG: AND YOU STILL THINK THAT PAILING IS A BETTER THING TO DO WITH YOUR TIME THAN HONING YOUR INSTINCTS SO THAT YOU CAN KEEP YOURSELF ALIVE IN THE SERVICE OF THE CONDESCE.  
AA: this is a weird conversation.  
AA: maybe we should have it later when we’re on our troll honeymoon.  
CG: TROLLS DON’T HAVE HONEYMOONS, IDIOT.  
CG: THAT WORD DOESN’T EVEN MAKE SENSE.  
CG: JOHN. HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT WORD?  
AA: hey i guess this explains all the nonsense i say all the time!  
AA: awesome! my friends think i’m crazy, but instead i’m just an alien in a troll’s body!  
CG: YES THAT’S GREAT FOR YOU.

Distracted as he is Karkat doesn’t hear the people coming up to his respiteblock until it’s too late.

“Karkat, something really exciting’s happened to John!” Jade bursts out.

Terezi’s grinning and behind them both Dave is trying to get a look at Karkat’s husktop. He smirks suddenly and steps forward, taking the machine out of Karkat’s hands and sitting down with the screen away from the girls. “Yeah, you have to see this. Hold on and I’ll load it up for you.”

CG: hey little man  
CG: i see youre getting some exposition  
AA: where’d the other guy go?  
AA: i was talking to him, put him back on.  
CG: no can do  
CG: hes busy getting caught up in the arms of troll and human women  
CG: its downright poetic what is happening here  
AA: i don’t believe you.  
CG: you dont have to but that doesnt make it anything other than truth

“You’re typing an awful lot for just getting Karkat to a point in the timeline,” Jade says with a frown.

Dave glances up at her, still typing. “I thought I could get some hacking in while I’m here. Ironic, really, because he willingly gave me his computer, still logged in and everything.”

AA: it doesn’t matter.  
AA: if i’m not talking to him there’s no point me staying in this conversation.  
CG: i just skimmed this nice little chat you two were having  
CG: and hes right btw rose would kill him if she even suspected he was messing around with you like this  
CG: im a human  
CG: one of your friends from earth  
AA: bullshit.  
CG: that hurts man  
CG: why do you believe him and not me?  
AA: because if you’re really one of those humans and all of this is true  
AA: i want to believe that i’d be able to recognise you without any reminders.

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] has gone offline --

It’s quick work to set up the husktop for Karkat and watching his dumbstruck reaction with a laughing Jade and Terezi almost makes him feel better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> /rolls tragically in a pile of hats


	8. Future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to skip past the Dave/OC hateshipping in this chapter, stop reading at his appearance. It's not essential to the plot, though will be referenced in later chapters.

atlasAppleby [AA] opened memo on board COOL BOARD FOR FRIENDS.

AA: hey guys!  
AA: wow, this is exciting.  
acapellaControvert [AC] responded to memo.  
AC: i - a P P r o v e - o f - t h i s - i d e a - o f - y o u r s - j o h n |  
AC: b u t - i - d o n t - l i k e - t h e - n a m e - o f - t h e - b o a r d |  
AA: hehe, yeah.  
AA: i couldn't think of anything when i was making it.  
AA: i thought in our first memo we could come up with a better name.  
triplicateCorruption [TC] responded to memo.  
TC: that nam3 haS you all ov3r it, john  
AC: c h i l d i s h n e s s - i s - q u i t e - c h a r a c t e r i s t i c - o f - h i m |  
AA: okay, what do you want to call it?  
TC: g3t r3ady for thiS john im juSt going to throw gr3at id3aS at you  
AC: t h e - f r i e n d l y - c o l l e c t i v e |  
TC: alt3rnian und3rground armada  
TC: appl3fruit vigilant3S  
TC: oh, ar3 w3 going that Stupid way???  
AC: t r i P e l |  
TC: im Sorry l3t m3 giv3 you Som3 mor3 appropriat3 Sugg3StionS th3n  
TC: n33d for fr33dom 2: th3 furiouS fri3ndShip  
TC: it can b3 a board wh3r3 w3 driv3 v3hicl3s towardS 3ach oth3r for th3 appar3nt r3aSon that w3 ar3 fri3ndS  
AA: hahaha!  
TC: magical fri3ndShip of th3 ringS  
TC: becauS3 w3 ar3 all awar3 that magic 3xiStS and our fri3ndShip iS magical and also ringS ar3 magical  
TC: that giv3S m3 anoth3r id3a actually  
AC: t r i P e l - y o u - d o n t - h a v e - t o - j o k e - a r o u n d - l i k e - t h i s - j u s t - b e c a u s e - y o u - d i d n t - l i k e - m y - s u g g e s t i o n |  
TC: fri3ndShip iS magic  
TC: thatS a gr3at on3, chang3 th3 nam3 of th3 board to that now john  
AA: those were funny but i'm only going to count your first two suggestions.  
TC: awww  
grandAlacrity [GA] responded to memo.  
GA: Ternio’s suggestions would attract Unwanted attention from the drones.  
AC: he - i s - r i g h t |  
AC: it s - b e t t e r - t o - b e - c a r e f u l |  
TC: th3 dron3S cant hack our lin3S  
GA: Even if they could not, there remains the Constant threat of the Condesce’s Imperial spies.  
TC: oh y3ah hacking mobil3 lin3S to liSt3n in to kid troll conv3rSationS  
AA: do you have any ideas for a board name, liro?  
GA: I am Afraid I am not Particularly Creative.  
GA: I will leave this task to others’ More Skilful attentions.  
AA: okay! :)  
carcinoGeneticist [CG] responded to memo.  
CG: WHAT AM I LOOKING AT.  
TC: who ar3 you???  
AC: j o h n - i s - t h i s - a - f r i e n d - o f - y o u r s - t h a t - w e - d o - n o t - k n o w |  
AA: oh shit  
AA: why are you responding to this memo?  
CG: YOU ADDED ME TO THE BOARD.  
AA: well, yeah i did...  
AA: i thought you'd want to see what we were talking about.  
AA: i didn't think you'd actually respond!  
TC: oh maaan  
TC: oh man oh man oh man  
AC: P l e a s e - i n t r o d u c e - u s |  
TC: i think thiS iS johnS mat3Sprit!!!  
TC: Shouty guy, wh3r3 hav3 you b33n???  
CG: DON’T CALL ME THAT.  
TC: it obviouSly SuitS you  
CG: HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF I STARTED CALLING YOU CAVE CHICK.  
CG: THESE NICKNAMES ARE IMMATURE AND DEGRADING.  
TC: i gu3SS john told you that  
TC: but i dont liv3 in a cav3, i liv3 in a cav3rn  
TC: itS a common miStak3  
CG: I DON’T GIVE THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF A FUCK.  
AC: a r e - y o u - r e a l l y - j o h n s - m a t e s P r i t |  
AA: look i don't want to be rude but can you stop responding to the memo?  
AA: i haven't told my friends about you and i don't think i can explain it.  
TC: your3 not g3tting away with Som3 hand waving and ‘‘‘ill t3ll you lat3r’’’S now  
TC: the jig iS up johnny boy  
AC: y o u - a r e - n o t - w h a t - i - e x P e c t e d |  
TC: y3ah  
TC: i thought h3d b3 Som3 nic3 timid kid too Shy to com3 and talk to uS  
CG: I’M SORRY I CAN’T BE THE NITRAM TO HIS SERKET.  
CG: WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT WE’RE IN A RELATIONSHIP AND IT’LL WORK BETWEEN US BECAUSE OF THE FEELINGS THAT WE HAVE FOR EACH OTHER, NOT WHO OR WHAT WE ARE OR WHETHER OUR MUTUALLY INTERFERING FRIENDS APPROVE OF IT.  
CG: SORRY TO FUCKING DISAPPOINT YOU, BUT THIS IS ALREADY HAPPENING.  
TC: that waS Som3 amazingly Sappy Shit  
TC: john, go ah3ad and 3mot3 to him, i know you r3ally want to  
AA: you caught me!  
AA: <3  
CG: THIS IS FUCKING STUPID.  
CG: <3  
AC: i - t h i n k - y o u - t w o - a r e - s w e e t |  
AC: j o h n - i s - f a i r l y - m i s g u i d e d - s o - i t - c o u l d - b e - g o o d - f o r - h i m - t o - h a v e - a - s t r a i g h t f o r w a r d - m a t e s p r i t |  
GA: John, I am finding my thoughts Difficult to reconcile.  
GA: Is this the same gray text individual you mentioned to me over a sweep ago?  
AA: damn.  
AA: yeah, uh, it is  
AA: but i had it wrong and he's really my matesprit so you don't have to threaten him or anything.  
AC: h e - w i l l - t h r e a t e n - h i m - i n - a n y - e v e n t u a l i t y |  
CG: THERE’S NOT MUCH THAT THE FISH KILLER CAN DO TO ME WHEN I’M NOT EVEN ON ALTERNIA.  
TC: i fucking kn3w it!!!  
TC: h3S old3r than you and in th3 cond3Sc3S S3rvic3!!!  
GA: So you are not a Strange alien who has been stalking John?  
AA: yeah okay.  
AA: i can't rescue this so i'm just going to close the memo.  
AA: bye everyone.

AA closed memo.

atlasAppleby [AA] changed name of board to THE FRIENDLY COLLECTIVE (sorry trip!).

* * *

> Tripel: Go back in time.

Like every other mortal, you can only go forward in time. You do however have the ability to REMINISCE.

> Tripel: Reminisce.

As you walk through the APPLEFRUIT ORCHARD you think about Dulcis’ accident and the message you got right before. You still have a copy of it on your mobile device, which you have read over and over. You are confident that you remember the conversation accurately.

\-- tentacrazyTherapsycho [TT] began trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

TT: Im not going to tell you who I am cause that’s too hard or some shit.  
TC: unl3SS you do im going to block you  
TT: I’m not listening to you either because im probably a bitch.  
TT: Dulcis is in danger and you have to message her right now or bad stuff.  
TC: you hav3 to t3ll m3 why firSt  
TC: im not going to juSt liSt3n to you  
TT: ha ha ha you’re welcome for my interfering suckiness.  
TC: what???

\-- tentacleTherapsychopersondontlistentome [TT] ceased trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

In actuality your BITTERNESS over the incident has caused you to remember it wrongly. The conversation really went like this.

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

TT: You don’t know me and I’m afraid I have neither the time nor motivation to explain myself to you.  
TC: thatS not going to cut it  
TC: you cant juSt m3SSag3 m3 and t3ll m3 your3 not going to Say who you ar3  
TT: I need to tell you that your friend Dulcis is in immediate danger.  
TC: what???  
TT: Tell her to get out of the trees for her own safety.  
TT: This action will save both of you a lot of heartache.  
TC: how could you know that  
TC: why ar3 you Saying thiS  
TT: You’re welcome.

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

> Tripel: Take applefruits.

Now that your LUSUS is awake, you have to share your food with him. It wasn’t much to begin with and now you are CONSTANTLY HUNGRY. Hungry enough to go to your friend’s hive and steal some of her applefruits. You figure that she’d give them to you if you asked, anyway. You are too proud to ask your friends for more help than they already give you.

Soon your lusus will be able to go hunting and foraging with you, but for now he is adjusting to the world outside his cocoon.

You captchalogue a few RED APPLEFRUITS before seeing a GOLDEN one hanging on its own, hidden by the leaves of the tree. It’s small so you decide to eat it now instead of wasting space in your SYLLADEX.

You take a bite. As the juice washes over your tongue, the world around you shifts and changes until you are surrounded by darkness. You stare into it, too surprised to feel scared, when there is a low droning sound and the lights come on. You’re faced with grey walls covered in pictures, carpet and chairs in colours you’ve never seen before, and some sort of monster with pink skin that appears to be reading a book.

It looks up at you and you stare at each other. Then you spit the bit of applefruit out and you’re back in Dulcis’ lawnring.

You drop the applefruit. Then you pick it up and CAPTCHALOGUE it, in case it turns out to be important later.

* * *

earthlyMinistrator [EM] opened memo on board SELECTIVE EXPOSITIONING.

EM: If you are seeing this memo, you are the only one seeing it.  
EM: In fact you are the only one aside from myself who has access to the board (at least at this point in either of our chronologies).  
tentacleTherapist [TT] responded to memo.  
TT: I have questions. Will you answer them?  
EM: Go ahead and ask.  
EM: We’ll both find out soon enough.  
TT: Why is access presently restricted to me?  
EM: In order to complete certain time loops.  
EM: (Or begin them, if you’d rather think of it that way.)  
TT: Thank you for your forthrightness.  
EM: Oh, that’s fine! It doesn’t cost me anything.  
EM: It’s probably even necessary that my personality and yours are the ones caught up in all of this.  
TT: On that note, who are you?  
EM: I am a soldier of language in the business of time.  
TT: I see.  
EM: I happen to have a god client which grants me omniscience.  
TT: Can I safely assume that you are using it for selfish gain?  
EM: I’m not the antagonist of this story. That is time itself. It is simply my job to manage it.  
TT: Are you working for a greater, potentially antagonistic entity?  
EM: No, I’m self-employed.  
TT: Right.  
EM: I reward myself proportionately to the amount of work I do. It’s a system I would recommend to anyone with the means for it.  
TT: I expect this is the beginning of a lengthy correspondence.  
EM: For me, it already has been.  
TT: Is there anything you would like me to call you?  
EM: My name is Emma.  
TT: Excuse my disbelief.  
EM: I am a human girl living on an alternate version of Earth, where Sburb was never played and the planet was never torn apart by meteors.  
EM: Unfortunately that also means John was never able to create you, your friends and predecessors through the application of ectobiology. In my world, none of you even exist.  
EM: You have to take the bad with the good, I suppose.  
TT: If what you are saying is true, how can we possibly be talking right now? Communication would be impossible.  
EM: That makes for a nice segue! Thank you.  
EM: I’m using a god client to watch and communicate with you and your friends.  
EM: It’s an extraordinarily complex program and I still don’t know how I managed to create it, though it was probably almost entirely by accident.  
EM: I call it Titanium.  
TT: That’s a little unoriginal.  
EM: Oh, you’ll get it later. Then you can come back to this board and tell me, ‘Oh Emma I’m so sorry actually you are very clever and good job with that one.’  
EM: ‘Must have required some foresight how enviable is your omniscience when my Sight is limited by all sorts of factors including chronology and bias.’  
EM: A sad fact which our communication will rectify.  
EM: I have a modified Trollian client that will allow you to follow the timelines of yourself and your friends and interact with them regardless of when and where they are.  
EM: Even if this wasn’t necessary to complete a time loop, I would have offered it to you.  
EM: Which is likely the motivation which caused the time loop to exist in the first occurrence of this reality (assuming there ever was one).  
TT: As useful as that sounds I don’t trust you.  
TT: My dealings with Doc Scratch were similar to this.  
EM: I could probably convince you with some time coordination, where you tell yourself to trust me, and as you trust yourself you trust me because you told you to.  
EM: But I don’t like to play around with time. I think it’s serious business.  
EM: All I can do is hope that you’ll believe me, as one human girl in an extraordinary situation to another human girl in a different but also extraordinary situation.  
TT: It’s possible you aren’t what you claim to be.  
EM: That’s true of anyone.  
EM: At what point do you start believing someone? When you’ve met them? When time has passed? When you’re married and celebrating your anniversary together?  
EM: I think it’s when you have to, or you want to.  
EM: You have to eventually, Rose, or you’re dooming your timeline.  
EM: But you could do it now because you want to believe what I am saying.  
EM: I imagine it would be nice to think, in your position, that there’s some version of Earth that still exists and will indefinitely.  
TT: I’m choosing to believe you.  
TT: Only because if I do you will give me the program, which will benefit me.  
TT: It’s to say absolutely nothing about the childish desires I may or may not have.  
EM: Great!  
EM: Here’s the file. Feel free to install it on any computer. You’re able to limit the capabilities of the new installations, with yours as a sort of master key to all of them.  
EM: trolltanium.rar  
EM: If you have any questions, open a new memo.  
EM: Our chronologies aren’t running parallel, so some of my answers may seem strange. Please listen to everything I have to say. It’s usually important.  
TT: Is that all?  
EM: What more were you expecting?  
TT: Perhaps you wanted something in return?  
EM: What could you possibly give me?  
EM: We’re not even living in the same reality. It’s only through some crazy happenstance that we’re able to talk.  
EM: Just listen to what I tell you, I suppose. I’m trying to keep your timeline from being doomed. It’s hard enough to manage the alpha timelines I have here without Davesprites complicating everything.  
TT: Another question.  
EM: Yes?  
TT: Are you watching our lives the way the trolls did?  
EM: Titanium has a camera function similar to Trollian, but it isn’t bound to the individual whose timeline is being observed. It can move around and go wherever I want it to.  
EM: Unfortunately your modified client won’t have the same function.  
EM: Yes, I can see all of you. But I jump around a lot in time and space.  
EM: To be honest staying on one of you for very long makes me feel creepy.  
TT: Has your life lacked stability?  
EM: That you’re trying to psychoanalyse me is probably a good sign.  
EM: I’ll close this memo. Go ahead and open one yourself for whatever purpose.

EM closed memo.

* * *

tentacleTherapist [TT] opened memo on board SELECTIVE EXPOSITIONING.

TT: John has been sent back to Alternia.  
TT: I was reviewing the last observable point of his timeline and wanted clarification on it.  
earthlyMinistrator [EM] responded to memo.  
EM: Yes?  
TT: It cuts off when he is seven and a half sweeps old.  
TT: I’m told that’s when Alternia is obliterated by the game.  
EM: Yes.  
TT: I don’t think that he dies there.  
TT: But the visions have been unclear. It remains a possibility.  
EM: Yes, a possibility which would only happen in a doomed timeline.  
EM: The timeline cuts off inexplicably because the program I gave you isn’t advanced enough to follow him through what will inevitably happen.  
EM: It wasn’t necessary to give you one that could view it. It’s not something I thought you really needed to see, either.  
TT: Will John be all right?  
EM: John is always alright.  
EM: Honestly speaking, he’s less alright then than he always is.  
TT: They’re discussing here whether or not we will meet him in dream bubbles.  
EM: It’s possible.  
EM: I wouldn’t recommend looking for him. You might see something you won’t easily forget.  
TT: Thank you. This has been surprisingly helpful.  
EM: That’s fine!

TT closed memo.

* * *

tentacleTherapist [TT] opened memo on board SELECTIVE EXPOSITIONING.

TT: Do you know anything about the power outages?  
earthlyMinistrator [EM] responded to memo.  
EM: That’s because he is.

earthlyMinistrator [EM] opened memo on board SELECTIVE EXPOSITIONING.

EM: I’m not sure how to tell you this, but I think there might be a problem.  
tentacleTherapist [TT] responded to memo.  
TT: There’s certainly a problem with the board.  
EM: Pardon?  
TT: I just opened another memo to ask you about the blackouts.  
TT: You responded nonsensically and then this memo opened within the other one.  
EM: Damn!  
EM: Hang on.  
EM banned TT from responding to memo.

EM: Sorry about that. This should fix it, but now I’m having two conversations with you simultaneously. Probably neither of them will make sense.  
TT: You could fabricate a time loop and have both conversations naturally.  
EM: Time loops are bad. They’re really  
EM: annoying. Damn, I hit the enter key by accident.  
EM: Damn, I did it in the other conversation.  
EM: You are going to have to forgive me when you get to that one.  
EM: What are we talking about? The power.  
EM: Yeah, it’s interesting that all this would happen to John right as the meteor’s power is about to permanently fail.  
EM: Doesn’t seem like a coincidence at all.  
TT: Are you suggesting that the blackouts are linked to John’s return?  
EM: I can’t say anything about that, but you’re the one who has to solve the power problem.  
TT: Why me specifically?  
EM: Because I’m only talking to you and only I know how to solve it in the amount  
EM: of time you have.  
EM: I hate this enter key right now.  
TT: The power on the meteor is going to fail completely unless I act within a certain amount of time.  
EM: Spot on. Luckily, what you have to do isn’t that hard.  
EM: There’s a generator for the laboratory and - oh, hang on for a second please.  
TT: Your aversion to time manipulation shouldn’t overcome your need to be practical.  
EM: There’s also a huge one in another building, which powers the meteor.  
EM: Gamzee has been getting all sorts of things jammed in it and it’s finally had enough.  
EM: Much like I have of you telling me to abuse my own omniscience.  
EM: It’s hard enough with our chronologies not being compatible. You want me to go through the hell that is time loop dependence?  
TT: Dave doesn’t have much trouble with them.  
EM: Dave is a different animal. He’s a time god, I’m a ministrator.  
EM: The important components of the generator can be found behind a panel towards the back of the machine at the base. It faces the wall. I can’t give you much clearer directions.  
EM: Remove them and install them in the body of the generator that powers the laboratory.  
EM: That’s all you need to do for now.  
EM: You won’t install them properly so the power will keep failing.  
TT: Can’t you tell me how to do it properly?  
EM: No, because the blackouts are necessary to complete a time loop.  
EM: Do you see how much of my day is time loops? Here, there and everywhere, harassing me to death.  
EM: Nearly all of my interactions with you guys are beginning or completing time loops.  
EM: If Dave had to do my job for a day he’d doom himself just so he could relax for a while.  
TT: I don’t think you can complain about that.  
TT: You would have time to relax if you used the time loops.  
EM: I’ve answered your question. Do you have any more?  
TT: Is it unwise to tell Kanaya about all of this?  
EM: Why do you want to tell her?  
TT: Shouldn’t you know that already?  
EM: Yes, but I like these question  
EM: rallies that we have.  
EM: Please close the memo now, I have to go and deal with you.

TT closed memo.

* * *

earthlyMinistrator [EM] opened memo on board SELECTIVE EXPOSITIONING.

EM: I’m not sure how to tell you this, but I think there might be a problem.  
tentacleTherapist [TT] responded to memo.  
TT: There’s certainly a problem with the board.  
EM: Pardon?  
TT: I just opened another memo to ask you about the blackouts.  
TT: You responded nonsensically and then this memo opened within the other one.  
EM: Damn!  
EM: Hang on.  
EM banned TT from responding to memo.  
TT: So this is where you talk to two of me at once.  
EM: Yes, it probably won’t make any sense.  
EM: Which is a shame because what I have to  
EM: tell you is important.  
EM: Damn, I hate this enter key.  
TT: Tell me quickly, then.  
EM: At this point in your chronology John has developed not only awareness but understanding of his situation.  
EM: He knows he was a human, though he still lacks his memories of that life.  
TT: What are the repercussions of that?  
EM: Aside from him taking his wall scribbles a bit more seriously?  
EM: He’s trying to remember.  
EM: It could compromise him and doom you all - sorry, could you wait a second? I’ve got to explain the generators to you.  
TT: You’re clearly distracted by the other conversation.  
TT: I know we’ve already discussed it, but why not just use time to your advantage?  
EM: It’s only a potential scenario, but if John becomes emotionally detached from his life on Alternia, he won’t be motivated to act the way he needs to later on.  
EM: You’re always bothering me about this. Time loops are dangerous things and I can’t accept the repercussions of my own mistakes.  
EM: The solution is not to make them. Discussion over, case closed, everyone go home.  
TT: It sounds like you’ve had a negative experience.  
EM: I’m not going to talk about it right now.  
EM: I started this memo because I’m concerned about the integrity of John’s timeline.  
TT: John would never abandon his friends. From what I’ve seen of him on Alternia he genuinely considers those trolls as such.  
TT: He is also thoroughly attached to his lusus.  
TT: It’s unlikely that he would distance himself from them.  
EM: That’s good to hear, thank you.  
TT: Are you going to tell me how he found out?  
EM: You can figure that out on your own.

EM closed memo.

earthlyMinistrator [EM] changed name of board to SELECTIVE EXPOSITIONING - A.

* * *

tentacleTherapist [TT] opened memo on board SELECTIVE EXPOSITIONING - A.

TT: I’m starting to suspect that Karkat is hiding something.  
EM: That’s because he is.  
TT: Is he using the modified client to communicate with John?  
EM: Yes, but you can’t interfere with them.  
TT: I suppose there are more time loops which need to be completed?  
EM: You’re exactly right!  
EM: There’s nothing to be done now but let everything happen the way it will.  
EM: You’ve done everything that I needed you to do deliberately.  
EM: Thank you for helping me.  
TT: You’re welcome.  
TT: Will you continue to answer my questions?  
EM: I’m happy to do that.  
TT: Can I message one of John’s troll friends?  
EM: Are you asking me if that’s ethical or possible?  
TT: I don’t want to adversely affect their lives.  
EM: I’m omniscient but I still only have my perspective on things.  
EM: I’ve seen what you do and the outcome of it. Whether it’s a good or bad one is entirely my own opinion and I don’t think it should affect your decision.  
EM: You’re responsible for yourself and what you do to others.  
EM: I envy you that, as someone who is only responsible for others.  
EM: Being careful or reckless both have their merits and they mean that you are not alone.  
TT: That told me a lot about you but didn’t answer my question.  
EM: Yeah.  
EM: I don’t want to be responsible for the decision that you make.  
EM: So just go ahead and make it, geez.  
EM banned TT from responding to memo.

EM closed memo.

* * *

Dave sits with his arms crossed and Trollian open on his shades. He’s pretending to watch the screen with the others, when really he’s working his way through John’s timeline, choosing points along it without any real plan and messaging the fish killer. He can hear John’s voice, slightly distorted by the laptop speakers, and the quiet murmuring of his friends as purple and red lines appear on his shades.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: fk  
GA: You again.  
TG: yeah  
GA: If you are about to enquire as to my health, I will tell you that I am Well Enough.  
GA: The scuttlebeast incursion is Mercifully Slow.  
TG: yeah i wasnt going to do that  
TG: hows john  
GA: I do not understand your interest in him.  
GA: Are you Certain it is not Romantic?  
TG: hahahahaha  
TG: no  
TG: even if i went that way johns my best bro  
GA: What does that mean?  
TG: i tried to explain this to rez before and she didnt get it  
TG: im not hopeful for you  
TG: but whatever think of your ancestor  
GA: He was a Valiant Defender of the land who used only his horns to overcome the lowbloods that rebelled against the Condesce’s Admirable tyranny.  
TG: wow ok  
TG: youre descended from him because he did the deed and handed in his pail right  
GA: That is a Remarkably Crass way of putting it.  
TG: well whatever other trolls are out there running around with his genetic material are your siblings  
TG: girls are sisters and boys are brothers  
GA: So you are saying that you and John share an Ancestor?  
TG: no no hold up  
TG: on my planet if youre close to someone you say theyre like a sibling to you  
TG: its a compliment  
GA: Why would that be a compliment?  
GA: I have no affiliation with My ‘siblings’. It is the same as saying that they are a stranger to me.  
TG: on my planet we have families  
TG: people who take care of us and teach us things  
GA: Lusi, then.  
TG: no  
TG: theyre not crazy monsters with anger issues who we have to feed and shit  
TG: theyre the same species as us and can talk  
TG: look i dont want to explain this to you  
TG: its a good thing ok  
GA: It is Admittedly Difficult for me to grasp.  
GA: But it would seem to confirm that you care for John Platonically.  
TG: yeah  
GA: I wish I was not the one to bear this Bad news.  
GA: John has Recently become Conciliatory with a Mutual acquaintance.  
GA: Their bond is made stronger by the sweeps of companionship on which it is based.  
TG: thats nice but youre not hearing me  
TG: i dont want to romance john  
GA: Then what is your interest in him?  
TG: jesus dude youre talking to an alien whos been messaging you since you were pulling legs off crabs  
TG: i mean youve never even asked me where i am or how i can see you or why blocking me does shit all  
TG: im cool with that youre just an unfeeling dick with no curiosity fine  
TG: but every time  
TG: every time i talk to you you make this a sexual thing  
TG: theres more to life than pailing  
TG: i am an authority on how true that shit is  
GA: I have never asked you those questions because I never believed you would answer me Honestly. I do not like to waste My time.  
GA: I did not express concern about you for fear it would be interpreted as flirtation.  
GA: Lastly, I am Apparently Overaware of Romantic matters because I am Lonely.  
GA: Something I have Always Privately thought may be the cause of My Boredom.  
TG: you dont have to kill fish though  
TG: you could make friends with them give them names and shit  
TG: make your house a home  
GA: That is an Interesting proposal and one I would not have expected from you.  
GA: Perhaps it is Worth some thought and effort.  
GA: Thank you.  
TG: yeah  
TG: so john has a morall huh  
GA: ‘Moirail’.  
TG: still no clues about his matesprit  
GA: He is Evasive when questioned, but Physical signals are there to confirm that he is in a red relationship.  
TG: you mean troll pheromones  
GA: Another of your Alien terms. John is not appealing Sensorily to trolls who could Prospectively satisfy that quadrant.  
GA: Interestingly, there is no Sensory trace of another troll on him.  
GA: This is Curious as it suggests he has no Concupiscent relationships, or that he is out of contact with these partners.  
TG: all signs point to no  
TG: which means yes  
TG: i was right  
TG: fks racist douche troll nose has provided me with evidence  
GA: For a moment I thought we might be chatting Amicably.  
TG: you thought wrong  
TG: pacifist lonely whatever i still dont like you  
GA: If you were a troll this might be Different.  
TG: im not a troll dude  
TG: im an alien whos using you with time shenanigans  
GA: I dislike you Thoroughly.  
TG: thats more like it  
TG: chin up fk the water settles eventually  
GA: Are you pitying me now?  
TG: nah just got to keep my spies working happy  
TG: dont want the union coming in here shutting down operations  
GA: You confuse me.  
TG: good  
TG: well talk again in another season

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

He goes to a point further along the timeline. There's an image of John grinning at the bug lusus, with a cocoon torn open and oozing behind them.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: hey

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: calm down

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: seriously fk calm down

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: is that making you feel better

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: because its just really annoying me  
GA: FUCK.  
TG: nice to talk to you again too  
GA: Leave me Alone.  
TG: youre so alone already i thought youd be grateful for my company  
GA: STOP.  
GA: LEAVE ME the fuck ALONE.  
TG: so you lost your lusus

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: i get that man  
TG: it hurts but you cant get all mad about it  
GA: John has a matesprit and here is a log of our interaction with him.  
GA: coolboardforfriends1.txt  
GA: His trolltag is carcinoGeneticist and I estimate that they have been in a relationship for at least half a sweep.  
GA: Our business is now Concluded.  
GA: GO THE FUCK AWAY  
GA: and leave me alone.  
TG: my bro died  
TG: he got stabbed in the chest with a sword  
GA: It’s not the same thing.  
TG: fuck you  
TG: he was the only adult i was ever close to  
TG: he raised me, he taught me everything  
TG: im trying to sympathise with you here you dont have to throw it back in my face like that  
GA: It isn’t the same thing.  
TG: he died because of me  
GA: You are Incapable of telling the truth.  
GA: All you do is confuse. But now you are Unable to do even that to me.  
GA: Because I stopped giving a shit about what you say.  
GA: My lusus is Dead. You don’t need to understand that.  
TG: i didnt need to warn you about the crab monster either  
GA: That was BULLSHIT.  
TG: i didnt need to keep talking to you when i had what i wanted  
TG: i dont need you for anything

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: im talking to you now out of the goodness of my red blooded alien heart

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: you should be grateful  
GA: i should KILL YOU  
GA: your blood would look beautiful in this lonely water  
GA: fucking ENDLESS  
TG: its a sight youll never see fish killer  
TG: funny isnt it  
GA: SHUT UP  
TG: we call you fish killer and your lusus was basically a giant fish  
TG: im laughing my face off at how ironic this whole thing is  
GA: your lusus deserved to die  
GA: it was likely the only way he could escape you  
GA: im happy for him  
TG: fuck you no  
TG: it wasnt like that  
GA: But mine was LOVED.  
GA: I will MISS him.  
GA: I will AVENGE him.  
TG: i already know that you dont  
TG: eridan goes on to murder his own friends  
TG: and you die there on your fucked up planet  
GA: In my mind I have slaughtered him a million times.  
GA: When I have culled him in more ways than I can even count, my lusus will have been avenged.  
TG: youre pathetic  
TG: why did i ever bother with you  
TG: the cave chick would have been less trouble and shes like terezi and sollux mixed  
GA: Go to your others.

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: stop fucking doing that

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: stop it

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: i hate you so much fuck

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: STOP IT  
GA: LEAVE ME ALONE THEN  
GA: I DON’T KNOW WHY YOU BOTHERED EITHER  
TG: maybe i was trying to reach out to you did you ever think of that  
TG: your lusus died because you werent there with him  
TG: you were close but you hardly ever saw each other  
TG: it was just like me and bro  
GA: I never met him and if he was anything like you I would not want to.  
TG: you say youre lonely but its just an excuse  
TG: you killed everyone around you  
TG: if i was there you would have killed me too  
GA: I wouldn’t have done that, even if I had been able to.  
TG: is this where you tell me youre secretly in love with me and all of this was an elaborate ruse so id leave you to get it on with that music girl  
TG: moirails turning matesprits is fucked up by the way  
TG: its like incest  
GA: I hate you too much to kill you.  
TG: torture then  
GA: I would enjoy that.  
TG: i wouldnt want you to have anything you would enjoy  
TG: sorry buddy gotta take torture off the to-do list of our relationship  
GA: Fuck you.  
TG: better take that one off too  
TG: dont want you getting any ideas about all this

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: your lusus is dead and hes never coming back  
GA: i HATE you

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: youll never avenge him and you wont live long enough to miss him  
GA: I HATE YOU

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: youll never meet me and youre wasting all your hatred on an alien who doesnt and wont ever give a shit about you  
GA: I hate you SO much.  
TG: im flattered  
TG: go back to soft kisses with your music girl

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

The shades power off and he can see the darkened room. There’s the faint tapping of Rose with her laptop. She looks up from it and at him, her face lit up by the light of the screen. Dave can see her reproachful expression. There’s no way she can know that he’s looking back at her. After a while she goes back to tapping at her keyboard, clicking around the timelines, giving away nothing with her face but occasional disapproval. She’s the Doc Scratch of this game and a part of Dave - a small, uncool part - is afraid to question her.

He uncrosses his arms and leans forward in his chair. No one sees it but he hesitates before he asks, “How does hate romance work?”

“What?” Sollux peers at him in the dark. “Why all of a thudden?”

“Even when they’re making out John and new guy look like they’re trying to claw each other’s skin off. I don’t get it.”

“I would have thought that by now you would understand that trolls are more violent than humans,” Kanaya says. “A kismesis is an outlet for our natural aggression. They also challenge us to improve our physical skills so that we are able to survive. It is a relationship based on mutual hatred, which hardens us as individuals and may be considered by humans a kind of affection. You have to be deeply affected by someone to hate them, just as you do to pity them, or love them.”

“Where does the making out come into that?”

“I would say it’s become necessary for procreation,” Rose says helpfully.

“One form of challenge is the same as another,” Kanaya answers.

Dave taps the chair in front of him. “So how do you start a relationship like that?”

“A declaration of hate is the best way. It needs to be made clear if the feelings are returned or your black advances aren’t welcome. It is common to challenge the other, but I have seen that go very badly.”

Sollux laughs bitterly.

“If you are asking me this because you are interested in pursuing a caliginous romance with one of the trolls here, I have to advise you against it,” Kanaya warns. “Humans are physically much weaker than trolls and the expectation of a kismesis is higher than I believe any of you could withstand.”

“Is it possible to become kismesises with someone even though you’re not close enough to each other to fight and...whatever else?” Dave winces inwardly at the look Rose gives him.

“‘Kismeses’,” Kanaya corrects. “Of course it’s possible. Verbal violence is an aspect of a black romantic relationship, if you are fighting each other verbally with the understanding that the actions come from mutual hatred-”

Dave slumps over in his chair.

“-then you may have the potential for a black romance with that person.”

“Oh, shit,” Dave says under his breath.

Kanaya’s expression becomes sharp. “Dave, I can’t believe that you would be foolish enough to be in a situation like this-”

He stands up as she’s talking.

“-but if you have agreed to be someone’s kismesis you should call it off for your own safety.”

Terezi reaches over and rubs his arm. “Hey, coolkid. Is there something you aren’t telling me?”

“It’s nothing, Rez, really.”

“Is it Gamzee?” Kanaya asks, her voice cold.

“What the fuck? Why would I go anywhere near that crazy juggalo? No, it’s not Gamzee. It’s no one. There’s no one I’m kismessing around with, so we’ll leave it, okay? It was my own curiosity. Don’t make this weird. I’m goin’ to the kitchen to get some popcorn or something. If anything happens to John while I’m gone play it again for me when I get back, yeah.” Dave shrugs off their questions and goes out into the hallway.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: fk  
TG: im going to tell you now im not interested in you that way  
TG: this hate thing i dont know  
TG: id count myself lucky if i never saw your face or had anything to do with you again  
TG: so lets just put that away in the box of shit we never talk about and pack it up and not look at it again  
TG: at least until your planet is destroyed and you die tragically  
TG: dude i was just talking to you so theres no reason for you not to reply  
TG: i get that im a catch and you dont want to give me up but i didnt know what i was saying  
TG: i mean yeah i hate you  
TG: a lot but  
TG: not sexually  
TG: fk i know youre online so stop messing around and reply to me before i say something even more embarrassing than what i just did  
GA: You’re not making Any sense.  
TG: doesnt matter  
TG: just let me break up with you and then well be chill  
GA: There’s nothing between us to be broken.  
TG: what about all that hate we were throwing around before  
TG: that didnt land us in a quadrant or anything  
GA: You’re the one who has told me over and fucking over again that you’re not a troll.  
GA: It would have meant something if you weren’t an alien, and if just thinking about your blood didn’t make me want to retch.  
GA: I live underwater if you want to get a Nice, Clear image of how much I would hate that.  
TG: if you did id have a nice clear image of it right here  
TG: tempting  
GA: I wish I had nothing to do with you.  
TG: you wish you could do things with me that you cant  
GA:  
TG: yeah nothing to say to that  
TG: because its true  
TG: i told you when we started talking that id have to break your heart if you ever fell for me  
TG: looks like that time has come  
GA: GO AWAY.  
TG: and if its the hate thing getting you off theres only one way to do this  
GA: GO AWAY, FUCK.  
TG: you dont look that bad  
TG: i mean the fins are a little weird but whatever  
TG: cant take the bulge without the nook as they say  
GA: NO ONE SAYS THAT.  
TG: you can kill pretty well  
TG: youve had a lot of experience i guess haha  
GA: go to your own kind and cry about your sibling lusus.  
TG: i respect you because youve had a hard life but you keep going  
TG: you always took care of your lusus when he was alive and you try to protect your friends  
TG: you threatened me about john  
TG: and then you almost murdered him later but ok that was still you trying to look out for someone  
GA: You’re doing a Terrible job of this.  
TG: i think i did good  
TG: when i started i was worried i wouldnt find anything good about you but i came up with all those things  
GA: Alright, let me clarify this with you.  
GA: You find me Attractive.  
TG: whoa hey no  
GA: You think I am Competent and Dangerous.  
GA: You respect me because I am Determined and have Similar values to you.  
GA: This is everything we would look for in a kismesis.  
GA: Would you like to try again?  
TG: thats not what i said  
GA: Then GO AWAY.  
GA: If I don’t mean anything to you then just LEAVE ME ALONE.  
GA: You’re so IRRITATING, you just GET UNDER MY SKIN like some kind of parasite that likes to think it’s killing me, but it’s just curled up right there in my chest and I can see it but if I CLAW AT IT I will pierce my own organs and bleed out and die.  
TG: music girl must think youre so romantic  
GA: My relationship with Dulcis is NONE of your business. It wouldn’t be even if you were my kismesis. Different quadrants, Different relationships, Different people.  
TG: so are we broken up then  
GA: youre driving me INSANE  
TG: pretty sure you were already driven there  
TG: like two or three sweeps ago  
TG: blame it on your blood or whatever you want but you didnt need me to make you this crazy  
TG: you just need someone to blame it on when your gentleman act breaks down  
TG: must get hard  
TG: days and weeks and seasons and sweeps of you pretending to be someone else  
TG: pretending youre as calm as the lowbloods but still making it clear to everyone how much you despise them  
TG: you think youre better than that  
TG: but you really want to be one of them  
TG: you dont go near them because if you do you know that everyone will realise how violent and cruel you really are  
TG: john, music girl, theyll see that you always want to hurt them  
TG: youre always about to and you cling to this fake dignity so you dont  
TG: because you dont want to be alone  
TG: i was right when i told you before that you killed everyone who could ever have been close to you  
TG: i just hope john stays far enough away from you before alternia is destroyed and we can airlift him out of that hell  
TG: youre the most selfish person i have ever met  
GA: THEN RUN AWAY.  
GA: RUN AWAY FROM ME SO I DON’T HURT YOU EITHER.  
TG: you told me already  
TG: you hate me too much to kill me  
TG: anything less than that i can take  
GA: SHIT  
GA: i hate you, i hate you, i hate you  
GA: you dont even know what that means FUCK everything  
TG: yeah ok  
TG: show me where to sign and ill be your damn kismesis  
TG: get used to the chest parasite and dont claw me out or ill dig deeper  
GA: what.  
TG: if were gonna do this i have to tell you  
GA: what?  
TG: my name is dave  
TG: i dont care what your name is and im always going to call you fk  
TG: but if you want to tell me fine just know i wont remember it  
GA: My...name is Liro.  
TG: pssssh  
TG: rose is going to eat me alive  
TG: ill just have to put her on karkats scent first  
TG: and avoid the fuck out of kanaya  
TG: these shenanigans backfired on me pretty good  
GA: How Nice.  
GA: Maybe you could go tell someone who cares about your problems instead of boring me to death with them.  
TG: fuck you  
TG: whats the emote for this  
GA: <3-  
TG: good to know

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--


	9. Active

> John: Sleep.

You’re curled up comfortably on a balcony, protected from the sun by the shade of your hive. The wind brushes soothingly over you. It hasn’t been as loud this season, not since Dulcis’ accident. You think that is an unfortunate coincidence but are happy to hear and feel the wind at all.

You fall easily to sleep.

* * *

A boy drifts silently through the lawn-ring. His pale skin should burn in the sunlight, but it doesn’t. He does have the sense to keep his eyes closed. All of the trolls are sleeping in their recuperacoons and no one sees him flying past their hive.

His blue cape catches in the wind but he doesn’t seem to notice. Only the boy knows where he is going and he travels there quietly. If anyone was able to read his mind at this moment, they would find him thinking something like this:

whooooooOOOoooooooooOOOOOOOsssssshhhhhhhh

whoooooooOOOOOOOOOooooossssSSSSsssssshhhhhh

They would probably conclude that he is insane and leave him to do whatever it is he is doing.

He goes to the back of a hive and into the orchard there. A troll girl tends to it when she is not bothering the neighbours with her deafening racket. At the moment she is in her recuperacoon dreaming about composing with her lusus.

Applefruits hang from the trees, some ripe enough for picking. Most are red but three of them, hanging together on a tree that looks no different from the others, are golden. The boy slows to a stop in front of these special applefruits and stares at them with closed eyes. After a moment he reaches out a careful hand. A breeze races around him and into the tree, fluttering the leaves.

The boy’s eyes open, slowly widening, as the wind dances around him and the applefruit waits for his fingers to touch it.

This time, his troll counterpart remains asleep.

His eyes open for the first time in this world. He looks at the applefruit and at his hand, and blinks.

Then he disappears.

* * *

You are sitting in your respiteblock with your husktop on your lap. It’s morning but you’re not tired enough to go into your recuperacoon. You never liked it much anyway. The slime always felt really weird. If you didn’t suffer from SLEEP RAGE, like every other young troll, you wouldn’t bother using it at all. The SOPOR comforts you, but you prefer to sleep outside where you can feel the wind.

You’re considering which TERRIBLE MOVIE from your collection to watch, when your husktop chimes with a message.

> John: Answer troll.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

CG: IT’S EARLY AND YOU SHOULD BE SLEEPING.  
AA: hi!  
AA: i'm not tired, really.  
CG: I’D PREFER IT IF YOU WENT INTO YOUR RECUPERACOON.  
CG: UNLESS YOU HAVE THE EXCUSE OF BEING A DAYWALKER YOU SHOULDN’T RISK EXPOSURE TO THE SUN. IT’S FOOLISH AND CAUSES ME TO WORRY ABOUT YOU.  
AA: i'm pretty sure daywalkers aren't real.  
CG: OH REALLY? HOLD ON A SECOND WHILE I GO AND TELL THAT TO KANAYA, MY DAYWALKER TURNED RAINBOWDRINKER FRIEND.  
CG: SHE’S RIGHT HERE.  
CG: TYPE SOMETHING FOR HIM, KANAYA. HE’S GIVEN YOU THE GIFT OF KNOWING YOU’RE NOT REAL. THE LEAST YOU COULD DO IS THANK HIM.  
CG: I Am Not Comfortable With This.  
CG: Hello, John.  
AA: hi?  
CG: I Will Be Telling Rose About This Interference With Your Timeline.  
CG: I Doubt She Will Be Pleased.  
AA: oh. well you can tell her it's okay.  
AA: i like talking to you guys.  
CG: Thank You. But I Doubt That Is Her Concern.  
CG: YES, OKAY, I MIGHT NOT HAVE THOUGHT THAT THROUGH.  
AA: is she really a rainbowdrinker?  
AA: that's so cool!  
AA: dull has all these novels about them. i was going to borrow them one time but she thought i would get sopor on the pages.  
CG: THAT SEEMS LIKE A REALISTIC FEAR.  
AA: haha, yeah.  
AA: hey, which movie do you think i should watch?  
AA: i can't decide between ‘a troll on his fifth wiggling day is stolen from his hive by an unfamiliar and simple-minded lusus and taken to a schoolblock hidden in the forest to be taught along with other young trolls to use magic by several midbloods who have evaded the imperial drones and committed treason by refusing the march for the condesce, he befriends two others and after seven unrealistic encounters with the schoolblockmaster overthrows him and is collected by the drones along with the others to march or be culled, contains themes of concupiscent and caliginous romance, forty-seven acts of non-fatal violence, thirteen acts of fatal violence, excessive use of fantastical elements and demonstrations of true Alternian justice’  
AA: or the classic ‘two trolls meet in a lawn-ring and are flushed for each other, but one mistakes the other for being in a concupiscent relationship with his moirail and they refrain from acting on their feelings, to later meet again when he has flipped quadrants to become matesprits with his then-moirail, the mistake is revealed and his feelings waver, he is nearly unfaithful but their problems are resolved when they flip quadrants again and become caliginous, freeing up his heart quadrant for the troll he had been attracted to, contains seven references to pailing, one non-graphic depiction of pailing, ten kisses and mild offensive language’  
CG: BOTH OF THOSE FILMS ARE AWFUL.  
CG: BUT IF YOU HAVE TO WATCH ONE, I WOULD CHOOSE THE ROMANCE.  
AA: do you like those?  
CG: I APPRECIATE THEM FOR THEIR ARTISTIC EFFORTS TO GRASP THE COMPLICATED NATURE OF TROLL COURTSHIP AND SENTIMENT.  
AA: that means yes.  
AA: i didn't know that about you.  
AA: when we meet, would you like to watch some of these films together?  
CG: ...  
CG: OF COURSE.  
CG: THAT WOULD BE...GREAT.  
AA: i'm glad that we share interests.  
AA: it's hard getting closer to someone when you don't have anything to talk about.  
AA: i guess we could talk about my other life, but i don't want to feel like i'm only that person to you.  
AA: if this is going to work i need you to see me as i am now, a troll.  
AA: not some nubby alien thing. i think you said i was a human?  
CG: YES.  
AA: i'm putting the film in now.  
AA: i've seen it four times and it's always really good.  
CG: MY FAVOURITE PART WAS WHEN HE TOLD HER TO GO AND THEN THOUGHT SHE HAD REALLY LEFT, BUT THEN MOMENTS LATER SHE CAME BACK AND THEY EMBRACED EACH OTHER FOR THE FIRST TIME AS MATESPRITS.  
AA: i like her moirail, he's really funny.  
AA: the subplot where he's worried they have a flush crush on the same guy is great!  
AA: like that scene where he'd invited them both to his hive and didn't know where to hide his pail, i always laugh when i see it!  
CG: I SUPPOSE WE CAN LIKE DIFFERENT THINGS ABOUT THE SAME MOVIES.  
AA: yeah.  
AA: i've missed you.  
CG: WHAT?  
AA: shit, i wasn't going to just say it like that  
AA: but it's true.  
AA: i missed you. it's been a long time since we last talked.  
CG: I CAN’T SAY THE SAME THING.  
CG: FOR ME IT’S ONLY BEEN MINUTES AND I CAN SEE YOU HERE ON MY SCREEN.  
AA: there's a whole season, at least, between every conversation we've had.  
CG: THE MORE I TALK TO YOU THERE, THE MORE TIME PASSES FOR ME HERE.  
AA: i guess i just have to catch up with all of you.  
AA: even though i have friends here and things are happening all the time, i wish that i could talk to you more.  
AA: i'm pretty happy with myself for tricking you into having all these conversations with me, hehe.  
CG: WHEN I SEE YOU AGAIN...  
CG: THAT’S NOT FAIR OF ME TO SAY.  
CG: ONCE YOU CATCH UP I WILL TALK TO YOU FOR EVERY ONE OF YOUR DAYS.  
AA: really?  
AA: how long do i have to go?  
CG: YOU’RE SEVEN SWEEPS OLD NOW AND EVERYTHING CHANGES IN ANOTHER TWO SEASONS. THERE’S NOT MUCH TIME LEFT.  
AA: great!  
AA: i feel like i'm getting closer to you.  
CG: IS THAT HOW I MAKE YOU FEEL?

You blink and read the line again. Then you glance around your hive, seeing the drawings on the walls and slime trailing out of your recuperacoon. You thought you had cleaned that up, like you do every time you wake up. If you don’t Salamandad isn’t happy with you and it stains the floor.

You take the conversation to your mobile line so you can go over and clean up the slime. You feel strange, like you’re dizzy. When you kneel down next to the mess it disappears. You blink at it and look around your respiteblock again.

AA: you don't say that.  
CG: I ALREADY HAVE SAID IT.  
AA: you didn't say that, though. you said a lot of swearwords because you were embarrassed.  
CG: IS THAT WHAT I SAID?  
AA: yes!  
AA: why didn't you say it this time?

One of the walls of your hive has changed, becoming white with posters and drawings of clowns that make you uncomfortable to look at. A slab appears, covered in material. You don’t know what it’s for but you feel like you should.

AA: what's going on karkat  
AA: this is really strange.  
AA: have i been poisoned? i don't have any enemies and my kismesis wouldn't do this.  
AA: i trust him not to do this.  
CG: YOU HAVEN’T BEEN POISONED.  
AA: how do you know??

The floor around the slab becomes furry and you touch it with your fingers. It feels weird on your skin, like grass but softer and not pointed enough to hurt you. You look out the window and see a shifting landscape, as if outside isn’t sure what it’s meant to be.

CG: DON’T WORRY. THIS IS NORMAL.  
AA: you're not him.  
AA: you're not him, are you.  
CG: NO, I’M NOT.  
AA: you're someone else.  
CG: NO, I’M NOT.  
AA: who are you? please tell me.  
CG: I’M NO ONE.  
CG: I DON’T EXIST.  
CG: YOU IMAGINED ME.

You stare out the window at where Salamandad’s tower should be. Instead there’s a windmill, which shifts into a castle, which shifts into an apartment building and then into the sea.

CG: THIS IS A DREAM.

You drop your mobile line but it doesn’t hit the floor. Instead you feel it weighing down your pocket like you never used it at all. Calmly, you go back to your husktop and type at the keyboard.

AA: i'm dreaming.  
CG: YES.  
AA: is this what dreaming is like?  
CG: DO YOU THINK THIS IS WHAT DREAMING IS LIKE?  
AA: don't mess with me.  
AA: if you're not him i don't mind threatening you.  
CG: DREAMS AREN’T ALWAYS LIKE THIS.  
CG: IF YOU TRY HARD ENOUGH, YOU CAN REMEMBER WHEN THEY WERE DIFFERENT.  
CG: MAYBE THE GODS WILL LISTEN TO YOU.  
AA: i don't trust them.  
CG: THE GODS?  
CG: BUT THEY HAVE GIVEN YOU SO MUCH.  
CG: THEY GAVE YOU BACK THE ONES THAT DIED.  
AA: i didn't want them.  
AA: if you die i want you to be dead.  
CG: DEATH DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY.  
CG: NOT FOR YOU OR YOUR FRIENDS.  
AA: are you talking about trip?  
CG: NO.

Your drawing of a male troll wearing a sweater warps and for a moment you’re scared that it will disappear. But it fills out and curls up until the troll is sitting there, a husktop in front of him, jarring the keys with his quick and violent fingers.

CG: CONTINUE THE CONVERSATION.  
CG: TRY TO REMEMBER HOW IT WENT. THEN YOU’LL KNOW WHAT YOU ARE HERE FOR.  
AA: it doesn't matter.  
CG: YOU THINK IT DOESN’T MATTER?  
AA: thanks for whatever you were trying to do, but karkat's here so i'll ask him instead.  
CG: WHAT

You take your hammer from your sylladex and bring it down heavily on your husktop. It smashes into pieces and the pieces lie there on the floor. As soon as you look away and back again, they have disappeared.

You put the hammer away and smile. Then you go over to the troll sitting against the wall of your respiteblock.

“Hey,” you say softly to him.

He looks up and you can see the confusion in his eyes. Abruptly it’s replaced by anger and he scowls. “What are you doing here?”

You laugh because you’re happy to see him.

“Why are you laughing?” He sounds frustrated.

“I was just telling you I missed you, and now you’re right here.”

His embarrassment changes him. He hunches his shoulders and little and looks down and away from you, gritting his teeth like he’s not sure what else to do with his mouth and blushing. You stare at his reddening cheeks with fascination.

“You’re red-blooded?” you ask, and it’s a harmless question - you’ll still love him if he is or isn’t - but he turns away from you like he wants to hide it. Pretty silly, considering as his matesprit you’re going to find out one way or another.

“I’m not a highblood,” he says gruffly.

“That’s okay. We’re overrated.” When he looks at you again you grin at him and he seems to relax. “Really, all we do differently is kill things. I wish I didn’t do that anyway.”

“When I was on Alternia I always wished I had the freedom to decide what I did,” he mutters.

“I have more social freedom than the lowbloods, sure,” you tell him, “but my blood restricts me in a different way. I _have_ to kill, or at least I really feel like I do. If I don’t I get angry. I might go mad one day. I think, having lived this way, you give up one thing to have another. You can’t have everything in this world of ours.”

He looks at you. He’s a little shorter, with messier hair than you drew. His horns are unscarred and small, but his eyes are tired and you know somehow that he’s done more and seen more than you.

“I love you,” you tell him happily, because in that moment you feel that you really do. You’ve never known anyone like him. You miss him when you aren’t talking and when you are, you feel like you could cheerfully listen to him forever. For as long as you could listen to him and he could talk.

He goes red again and doesn’t try to hide it. You grin at his expression.

“I think...I love you,” he says. “I don’t know what it means. It’s a human word, like bed. It honestly just seems stupid. I pity you a lot. I don’t know if you’re okay with that now.”

You are really okay with that.

You lean your head forward so that your horns catch on his. He breathes in sharply, not because that part of him is sensitive but because you’ve caught him off-guard with the intimacy of the gesture. You’re happy to see your horn curling around his. You could hurt him but this is the one person in the world you know you never would.

“I pity you so much,” you murmur. You touch his hair and find that it’s softer than it looks. He touches your neck, staring at the grey of your skin like he’s never seen it before. You watch him staring at you for a minute, appreciating the attention.

“When you were human,” he says and his voice is heart-wrenchingly soft, “you broke if one of us touched you. I ordered everyone to wear down their nails so that the humans wouldn’t get hurt. But you put out a memo straight after and told them it was okay and that they didn’t have to do it. You said human skin got tougher if it needed to. Calluses. It never did, though.”

You step closer to him as he talks, putting an arm loosely around his waist.

“You got scratched at least once a week. But you kept saying it was okay.”

“It’s not okay now,” you warn him. “Not even for fun. If you want to see my blood then ask me to. I would show you if you asked-”

“I know about blood rage,” he growls. You tense up and can’t help but rumble faintly back. “I’m not an idiot. My moirail is a violet blood.”

Your rumbling abruptly stops. “You have a moirail?”

He nods. “You know him. His name is Gamzee.”

“Are you kidding?”

“Why would I joke about that? To you it’s probably the same thing as treason.”

“Makara? He lives close to me. I always wanted to talk to him but I was too scared.”

“Yeah, I hear that a lot,” he says wearily. “Look, he’s done some messed up shit but I still care about him and that isn’t going to change-”

“What are you talking about?”

He stares at you, with surprise underneath his usual aggression.

“I’m jealous of Makara. He’s so gentle. I have to kill, or at least distract myself, but he just sits there on the beach and listens to the ocean. It’s really-” You stop talking when he begins to laugh. His shoulders shake and brush against you, you are standing that close.

“Sorry,” he gets out, turning his face into your shoulder to laugh some more. “I guess he was different with the sopor.”

You blanch. It makes sense to you all of a sudden. “He’s eating sopor?” you say weakly.

“Sorry to disappoint you.”

“Ah. Didn’t his lusus tell him not to do that?”

“They didn’t see each other much.” His laughter has stopped and now he’s staring at your chest like it’s water and he’s been living in the desert.

You put your hand on his waist and touch your fingers to his jaw, close to his ear. With this gentle touch you raise his face to yours and kiss him. He pulls away after a second and you smile and kiss him again. It’s nice. Soft and easy. You don’t want anything from each other but each other.

His forehead creases like he’s trying to figure this out. It’s not some code he needs to decipher. It’s kissing. You stroke his hair with your hand and he relaxes, sighing into you.

Somehow it’s him that changes it. He was hesitant to kiss you but he’s the one who deepens it, pressing closer against you with the length of his body, curling his fingers up into your shirt and underneath it when that isn’t enough. You don’t want to push him against the wall - god, not when it’s changing constantly like that - so you nearly fall over when you feel his tongue in your mouth. You want to laugh. You have the energy from this kiss to run around your hive a hundred times.

But you want more of him, so you smile into his mouth and kiss him more deeply, winding your tongues together until both of you are breathing heavily. His sweater is thick and it takes some work but you pull it off him. He shivers and you pull him close again. If he’s cold you will warm him. If he’s embarrassed, you’ll show him that with you he never has to be.

You twist back together until you’re leaning against a wall that you trust. Your shirt comes off and you don’t miss it, not when his skin feels like that against yours, warm and so good and so much. You want more of it. You kiss his jaw so that both of you can breathe and his hands curl up into your hair. You’re kind of really happy your hair is this length, now. You touch your teeth to his skin, just touching, not grazing or tearing and he freezes up and then lets out a moan that goes right through your body. 

And then you’re kissing again and you can’t remember why you stopped doing that because it feels awesome. You love him so much and being able to touch him is more than you ever thought you would have together. Your conversations were so much already, and now he’s here with you and you can’t imagine this being different.

You flip around so that his back is against the wall. You kiss him like you’re a land-dweller underwater and he’s giving you the oxygen from his lungs. It’s desperate and so soft and part of you wants to cry. He’s your matesprit. If you cried he would probably cry with you.

Your fingers run up and down his sides, exploring his body. His slide down your back. One of them lifts for a moment and returns. You look at him and realise that he is seeing something behind you. As you turn your head he puts a leg around your waist and grinds into you. You both gasp out and as soon as you can think again you repeat the motion.

He puts his other leg around you too, so you and the wall are all that are keeping him up. It brings you closer, rocking against each other in a rhythm you both instinctively know. You breathe into his neck and he sighs into your hair and it’s too much, all of this is too much. If this is a dream and you never wake up you’ll be happy. If you wake up, let you remember this until the time when you can see him again.

“Pail,” he whispers in your ear and you shiver. You’re beginning to understand why that’s a word you shouldn’t ordinarily say.

“I don’t have one,” you admit.

He stiffens and then moans at the movement of your hips. “Dammit,” he says through his teeth. “We can’t do this.”

“It’s a dream,” you say before he can get off you. “Yes we can. It’s a dream.”

He considers that and you kiss him, lightly, no tongue. You really want to continue but whatever he decides you’ll go along with. You wouldn’t mind if he asked you to roleplay, or tried to teach you how to program computers. Because it’s him and he’s with you.

“Okay,” he says finally and you spin him around in delight. “Hey, it’s not something to get that...ahh...”

You’ve put him down on the slab because you thought it might be softer than the floor. You were right, but there’s no time for you to feel happy with yourself. There’s a cute troll underneath you right now that needs your attentions. With you over him, you kiss again, feeling along the edge of his pants to see if he’s as aroused as you.

He makes a sound of approval so you pull them down, and your own. In seconds your bulges are twining together and you’re choking from the pleasure of it, writhing a little on top of him with your face pressed into his sharp shoulder. It seems he has more self-control than you, because he kisses your hair and one of your horns, gripping the other to tug you up so he can see your face. You look at each other, rocking, breathing, kissing, touching, until both of you cry out and liquid soaks your skin. Blue mixed with red. You glance down at it once, feeling self-satisfied at the sight, and lie more comfortably with him so you are curved towards each other.

His breathing slows and he opens his eyes, looking embarrassed again. “That’s why we need a pail.”

“It’s okay,” you say and kiss him lightly.

“We’ll have one next time,” he makes you promise.

You grin at the thought of a next time. "I won’t forget.”

He closes his eyes again, frowns a little, and opens them to look back at you. Then he laughs. You laugh with him, hugging each other on the slab, until you wake from the dream and all of it is gone.

> John: Remember.

You hug your knees on the balcony, staring at the ground without seeing it.

How could you ever forget?

* * *

Karkat drags himself into the room, knowing he looks depressed but too depressed to give a shit about it. His limbs feel weak like he hasn’t eaten in days.

He might not have eaten in days. He can’t remember.

“KK, did you get a bad bubble?” Sollux asks sympathetically.

Rose hands him his confiscated husktop. Her voice is stern as she says, “We put you in there to sleep.”

“Are you alright, Karkat?” Kanaya steps closer to him.

“Shut up,” he mutters, clutching his husktop to his chest. “Everyone just shut up.”

Dave pushes a chair loudly up behind him and presses on his shoulder so he’ll sit down in it. “I’m not surprised it’s getting to you, man.”

“What’s getting to him?” Jade says brightly. “Oh, Karkat, you look-”

One of the other humans gestures at her and she stops talking.

He can still feel fingers on his skin, lips against his and along his neck, hair brushing against his cheek, warmth, companionship. He misses John more now than he did, because now he knows what he is missing. It’s something none of the others here can give and only one or two of them understand.

“John...is in the dream bubbles,” he announces.

They react with surprise and happiness for some reason he can’t at this moment understand. To have something and then have it taken away from you is worse, he thinks, than ever having it at all. What he could have imagined between himself and John would never have compared to the real thing. Now he feels hollow after feeling so complete.

Rose verifies it with a few clicks on her laptop. “His dream self disappears when he is seven sweeps old. The last night he opens his eyes and disappears, but John keeps sleeping. That must be when he went into the bubbles. I’ve been waiting for this.”

“What are you waiting for?” Karkat snaps at her.

“Hey, Kar.” Dave’s voice is quiet, serious. “What happened in the dream bubble?”

“I don’t want to sleep again,” is all Karkat says.

He’s lying. He wants to go back to his respiteblock and find John again. But it hurts too much for him to think that it’s worth it.

“What did he look like?” asks Jade.

Karkat leans back in the chair, his grip on his husktop relaxing slightly. “Healthy. He smiled a lot.”

Dave breathes out sharply in amusement. “He does that.”

“He’s taller than me, but not by much.”

“Everyone’th taller than you.” Sollux points out. “I’m taller than you.”

“What did you talk about?” Rose asks curiously.

Karkat sits up again. “Gamzee. My blood colour. Uh...other stuff.”

“Did you do it?” Dave says too close to his ear.

“Dave!” Jade swats at him.

“It’s a reasonable question. They haven’t seen each other for a long time, and they’re-” Dave glances at Rose and Kanaya like he’s only now realised that they’re there, “-really good friends,” he finishes weakly.

Rose smirks and looks pointedly at Karkat, as if she’s waiting for him to answer the question.

“It’s none of your business.”

“I already know the two of you are matesprits,” Rose says evenly.

Karkat’s eyes widen, giving him away. “It’s still none of your business.”

“I wonder what we would see if we looked for him?”

“Look for him if you want to-” he catches himself. “Ah, but don’t do it.”

“Why?” Sollux squints at him.

“Blood rage,” Karkat says shortly. “Everyone leave me alone.”

“This calls for a memo.” They can see the faint light at the edge of Dave’s shades when he powers them on.

The others rush to their computers, except for Kanaya, who brings Karkat some grubloaf she’d warmed up with the cookalizer. She sits down next to him and watches as he reluctantly eats it. “Are you feeling well?”

He thinks about not answering her. She’s not his moirail and he doesn’t have to tell her the truth. “It hurts,” he tells her finally.

She nods as if she understands and sits with him until he’s finished.

* * *

> Callat: Log on to Trollian.

You fill in the information the program asks of you and in minutes you’re staring at the Trollian menu. A notice quickly pops up saying ‘atlasAppleby [AA] has invited you to board THE FRIENDLY COLLECTIVE (sorry trip!)’. You click on the name, hoping it works as a link. It’s been sweeps since you last bothered with a mobile device and you’re having trouble remembering how to operate them. You’re proud of yourself for getting this far.

It navigates to a submenu, with the board name at the top and a banner with smiley faces underneath it. You wonder what kind of idiot put it together. You don’t have to think too long before realising it was probably this AA person. Who is your kismesis. Who you willingly associate with and have announced to everyone that knows either of you knows that you consider a worthy challenge to you. For every one of the smiley faces on that banner you are going to cut him next time the two of you meet. Maybe in the shape of a smiley face, so he can realise what it is he did that angered you.

There is a list of memos, in order from newest to oldest. The first lines of each are visible and you can see many different colours of text. You gaze at them for a moment before opening up the settings menu.

> Settings > Layout > Font Type > light grey, medium

If they want to know your blood colour they can ask you.

Another message pops up. ‘atlasAppleby [AA] has invited you to untitled memo on board THE FRIENDLY COLLECTIVE (sorry trip!)’.

> Callat: Respond to memo.

atlasAppleby [AA] opened memo on board THE FRIENDLY COLLECTIVE (sorry trip!)

atlasAppleby [AA] changed name of board to THE FRIENDLY COLLECTIVE.

triplicateCorruption [TC] responded to memo.  
TC: about tim3!!!  
AA: hehe, sorry trip!  
TC: iv3 b33n r3ading that waaay too much  
TC: aS if i didnt forgiv3 you in th3 firSt minut3 of you changing th3 nam3  
grandAlacrity [GA] responded to memo.  
GA: John, there is something I Urgently need to discuss with you.  
AA: okay liro  
AA: probably not on the board unless you're okay with that.  
GA: This is a Private matter and not for the eyes of lowbloods.  
AA: i'll message you when the memo's closed.  
AA: until then can we lay off the lowblood thing? i've invited someone to the board and i want you all to make a good impression.  
TC: ar3 inSultS about highbloodS allow3d???  
AA: you know they wouldn't be, trip.  
AA: guys do you have to be at each other's throats all the time?  
acapellaControvert [AC] responded to memo.  
AC: w h o - i s - t h i s - n e w - m e m b e r - o f - t h e - f r i e n d l y - c o l l e c t i v e |  
TC: no off3nS3 dulciS but thatS Still a fucking t3rribl3 nam3  
AC: i - l i k e - t h e - s o u n d - o f - i t |  
GA: You are Hardly the example of discernment.  
AA: settle down.  
AC: i t s - a l r i g h t - l i r o - i - d o n t - m i n d - d i f f e r i n g - o P i n i o n s |  
AC: a r t - c o u l d - n o t - e x i s t - a s - i t - d o e s - w i t h o u t - c r i t i c i s m |  
TC: not 3v3ryon3 iS high-Strung lik3 you ca3rul  
TC: 3v3n your mat3Sprit thinkS you Should cut down on th3 uppitin3SS  
AA: trip if you are deliberately making digs at him because he is a highblood i want you to stop right now.  
AA: do i have to remind both of you that last time you were like this i ended up mortally wounded?  
absentContrectator [AC] responded to memo.  
AC: i’m curious as to how... you could be mortally wounded... and still live...  
AC: o h - t h e y - u s e - t h e - s a m e - l e t t e r s - a s - m e |  
AC: b o t h e r |  
AC: i don’t think... we will ever be confused...  
AC: y e s - i t - s e e m s - u n l i k e l y |  
AC: a l l - t h e - s a m e - i - w o n d e r - i f - i - s h o u l d - c h a n g e - m y - t r o l l t a g |  
AC: i wish that you wouldn’t... but it is your decision...  
AA: hi!

You stare at the small screen, unsure if you should reply to your kismesis. It would be the first time you have ever talked to each other.

TC: iS thiS that guy, john???  
TC: th3 on3 you told m3 about  
AA: yeah.  
GA: I would like for us all to be introduced.  
AA: haha...  
AA: yeah i don't actually know his name.  
TC: h3h3h3  
TC: thiS iS funni3r than th3 firSt tim3 you told m3  
TC: moStly b3cauS3 ca3rulS going to l3ctur3 you about it  
AC: i - l i k e - h i m |  
TC: Sorry dulciS h3 haSnt got th3 right quadrant fr33  
TC: aS diSappointing aS it iS w3 cant mak3 a w3irdly Shap3d polygon of r3lationShipS in our fri3ndly coll3ctiv3  
TC: unl3SS h3 and i b3cam3 mat3SpritS and h3 and ca3rul b3cam3 moirailS  
GA: I have never erred Enough to trust your judgment.  
AC: i’m not sure... what i think about this...  
AC: w h a t - i s - y o u r - n a m e |

You answer her without much hesitation.

AC: callat taraha... i’m fortunate to meet you...  
TC: wow h3S a charm3r  
TC: you r3ally pick th3m w3ll, john  
GA: You and this Callat are Romantically involved?  
AC: he is my kismesis...  
AC: t h a t s - w o n d e r f u l |  
AC: i - h o P e - y o u r - e x P e r i e n c e s - w i t h - t h a t - q u a d r a n t - a r e - b e t t e r - t h a n - m y - o w n |  
TC: :P  
AC: :)  
GA: How is it Possible that you did not know his name?  
TC: mayb3 youll und3rStand now what i hav3 to d3al with from him  
AA: yeah, uh.  
AA: i probably should have found it out before.  
AC: he did not know it... because i had not told him...  
AC: he has never heard me speak... it is my choice to torment him... with the possibility that i can...  
AA: you can speak?  
AC: i can type... that’s all you know for certain...  
TC: wow i would buy tick3tS to thiS  
TC: itS not lik3 you n33d it but you hav3 johnS moirailS bl3SSing  
AC: thank you... for your favour...  
GA: What is your blood colour?  
TC: you juSt had to aSk didnt you  
TC: cant k33p your bigotry to yourS3lf  
AC: i t - i s - a - r e a s o n a b l e - q u e s t i o n |  
TC: you didnt aSk hiS mat3Sprit  
GA: I already know his matesprit’s Unfortunate blood colour.  
GA: Despite what you think, I am not asking to know how I might treat him.  
GA: I am Curious as to whether it supports a theory that I have.  
AC: w h a t - i s - y o u r - t h e o r y - l i r o |  
GA: I suspect that highbloods find kismeses in lowbloods.  
AC: a h |  
AA: he is a yellow blood.  
AA: trip don't fight liro over something this small.  
AC: it’s not your right... to tell them about me...  
AC: unless they have seen my blood themselves... they have no reason... to know what colour it is...  
AA: you've bled enough around my hive that they could find it out easily without either of us telling them.  
AC: i wonder if i can speak...  
AC: no... i wonder if i will speak... when i am this angry at you...  
AC: i wonder if i will ever say to you... that i am angry...  
AC: i wonder if our language of violence... is enough to communicate... the extent of my feelings...  
AA: are you being serious right now?  
AC: perhaps it is too much to think... that you would know... if i was being serious or not...  
AC: it’s interesting, isn’t it...  
AA: what?  
AC: we can run out of blood... but we can’t run out of words...  
AC: in the same way... that we can’t run out of breath... not truly, not until we die...  
AC: it is an important part of myself... that i am keeping from you...  
AC: if i can speak... and i am choosing not to...  
AC: it may be that i can’t... and any pressure you apply... will result only in your regret...  
AA: inviting you to the board was a mistake.  
AC: physically you may overpower me... but intellectually i’m superior to you...  
AC: i will always be capable of more...  
AC: i will be always more... than you are able to comprehend...  
AA: you bleed when i cut you and fall when i hit you.  
AA: you're predictable enough without me having to understand whatever you have hidden away from me.  
AA: i don't need to know anything more about you than what your blood and your mouth taste like.  
TC: ah3m  
AC: you could have that with anyone...  
AC: but you’re with me... you want something that only i have...  
AC: my personality... my looks...  
AC: there’s something about me and no one else... that you want to see broken... and yet know will never break...  
TC: ah3m!!!  
AA: you're talking as if you're special, but i never said that you were.  
AC: you wanted your friends... your moirail... to impress me...  
AC: you invited me to this board... something important to you...  
AC: if i am not special to you... then i am at least important...  
AA: maybe i give you all of this so that i can tear it away.  
AC: maybe...  
AC: but i would like to see you... try to loose my grip on something...  
AC: you and anyone else... will never find what i have hidden away... unless i choose to show it...  
TC: i hav3 a n3w nam3 for th3 board  
TC: kiSm3SiS courtship: for that rar3 highblood that wont juSt Sw3ar at him and mak3 too much of hiS blood colour  
AC: t r i P e l - i - w a s - e n j o y i n g - t h i s |  
TC: Sorry, i waS juSt counting th3 S3condS until Som3on3 m3ntion3d pailing  
TC: probably you, john  
AA: haha  
AA: yeah i got a bit carried away there.  
AC: were you the one... who made the banner?  
AA: i made it.  
AC: was it a joke?  
AA: it's only temporary until someone can make a better one.  
AC: so it was not a deliberate provocation?  
AA: no.  
AC: i am going to cut... between your eyes this time...  
AC: i am going to make you strain... to see where i am making you bleed...  
AC: i will bind you... and bring you close to death...  
TC: pailing alarm  
TC: anyon3 who m3ntionS pailing 3arnS the wrath of th3ir kiSm3SiS’ moirail  
AC: and i will leave you where i have hurt you...  
AC: without any pailing... as per your moirail’s warning...  
AA: the banner isn't that bad.  
AC: it is worse than that...  
AA: inviting you to the board was a really big mistake.  
AC: why did you do it then?  
AA: honestly? i thought you wouldn't know how to use a husktop.  
AA: i thought you'd be helpless and i would get to teach you.  
AC: c o n d e s c e - f o r b i d - t h a t - y o u r - k i s m e s i s - b e - c o m P e t e n t |  
AA: haha, yeah.  
AA: i'm proud of you though.  
AC: i can’t say anything... after seeing that banner...  
AA: it's not that bad!  
TC: your r3lationShip iS obviouSly pr3tty n3w  
TC: dulciS w3r3 w3 anything lik3 thiS at th3 Start???  
AC: w e - d i d n t - h a v e - a - m e m o - t h e n |  
AC: i f - w e - w e r e - n o - o n e - w i l l - e v e r - k n o w |  
GA: Your relationship is Clearly Very Different to mine.  
TC: w3ll y3ah  
TC: diff3r3nt quadrantS  
GA: John, I need to talk to you now.  
AA: really?  
AA: okay.  
AA: trip i'm giving you administrator privileges.  
AA: please don't make me take them back.  
TC: thatS a gr3at id3a  
TC: now go play nic3 with th3 highblood  
AA: dull, can you keep an eye on her?  
AC: y o u - s h o u l d - h a v e - m a d e - m e - t h e - a d m i n i s t r a t o r - i n s t e a d |  
AA: i'm leaving the memo now.  
AA: callat...  
AA: your name is too long.  
AA: i'm going to work on that.  
TC: thatS hiS thing, h3 only lik3S four l3tt3r nam3S  
AA: oh okay liro's messaging me.  
AA: bye everyone.  
TC: iS h3 gon3???  
AC: i - h o P e - y o u - a r e - n o t - P l a n n i n g - t o - h i j a c k - t h e - b o a r d |  
TC banned AC from responding to memo.  
TC: that waS obviouSly 3xactly what i waS going to do

triplicateCorruption [TC] changed name of board to HIGHBLOOD REGRETS (sorry john!).

TC banned GA from responding to memo.  
TC: it do3Snt S33m lik3 it, but do you hav3 anything to chang3 th3 bann3r to???  
AC: unconsciouskismesis.jpg  
TC: your3 going to b3 good for him

triplicateCorruption [TC] closed memo.


	10. Future

There’s the low buzzing right before the power comes back on. Terezi calls the time. “Eleven minutes and forty-three seconds.”

“That’s not too bad,” Rose murmurs.

“The generator can hold out for twenty minuteth. I’m working on a backup but it’th not eathy when GZ keepth taking my toolth.” Sollux looks pointedly at Karkat.

“He gave you back your hardcutters.”

“Yeth, but my thoftcutterth have been mithing for two dayth! I do need thothe, KK.”

Karkat hunches over resignedly. “I think I have a pair in my respiteblock.”

“Thankth. But talk to him, I want my thtuff back.”

“That brings the average time of the outages to…eight minutes!” Jade smiles at them over the notebook she’s been working it out on. “There have been twenty-one so far, with the running total for today at thirteen.”

“Thank you, Jade,” Kanaya says.

She grins toothily. “No problem!”

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling adiosToreador [AT] \--

TG: i found the generator for the lab  
TG: theres a bigger one in another building that i think is meant to power this whole rock  
TG: but its dead and looks like its been that way for a while  
TG: i dont think sollux and rose could get it going  
TG: at least not anytime soon  
AT: uHH, tHATS FINE,

Tavros looks up from his mobile device. “Dave, uh, has found a generator, he thinks.”

“Good. We were cutting it close for time,” Rose says.

AT: bUT WHY, aRE YOU USING TROLLIAN,  
TG: oh damn im still logged in on this client  
TG: thanks for pointing that out t-man im not sure i would have noticed  
AT: nO PROBLEM, dAVE,  
AT: yOU STILL HAVENT, uH, aNSWERED MY QUESTION THOUGH,  
TG: dont think too hard about it  
TG: its just to troll karkat  
AT: dID HE BLOCK YOU, aGAIN,  
TG: well yeah he did do that  
TG: but really tav dont worry about it  
TG: its just shenanigans  
AT: oKAY, dAVE, }:)  
TG: welp i gotta go finish some time loops  
TG: ill catch all of you guys later

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased trolling adiosToreador [AT] –-

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling terminallyCapricious [TC] –-

CG: WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?  
CG: SOLLUX WANTS HIS TOOLS BACK. HE KEEPS COMPLAINING ABOUT IT AND IT’S GETTING ON MY NERVES.  
CG: I DON’T WANT TO HAVE TO LOAN HIM MY STUFF, GAMZEE.  
CG: CAN YOU JUST TELL ME WHERE THEY ARE?  
TC: GoOd MoRnInG bEsT fRiEnD!  
CG: IT’S BASICALLY MIDNIGHT, FUCKASS.  
CG: WHICH BLOCK ARE YOU STAYING IN NOW ANYWAY?  
CG: YOU JUST WENT AND MOVED AGAIN.  
TC: ItS a MiRaClE bRo.  
TC: I fOuNd A mOtHeRfUcKiNg OcEaN.  
CG: WHAT?  
TC: RiGhT hErE oN tHiS fLoAtInG rOcK wE aLl Be Up AnD lIvInG On.  
TC: ItS mOtHeRfUcKiNg BeAuTiFuL kArBrO.  
TC: I wAnT tO dRoWn YoU iN iTs CoLoUrS.  
CG: WHAT DID YOU EAT.  
TC: ThIs IsNt A tRiCk LiKe ThOsE oThEr FaKe MiRaClEs.  
TC: TrUsT mE lIkE iM tRuStInG iN aLl ThIs MaGiC rIgHt In FrOnT oF mE.  
CG: SO WHERE IS THIS OCEAN. I’M KIND OF SURPRISED WE DIDN’T NOTICE IT AFTER A SWEEP OF LIVING RIGHT NEXT FUCKING DOOR.  
TC: YoU nEvEr WaNt To BeLiEvE iN tHe TeChNiCoLoUr WoNdErS.  
CG: BECAUSE TECHNICOLOUR WONDERS AREN’T EVEN A THING, ASSHAT.  
TC: ThAtS wHy I pItY yOu So MuCh.  
TC: ItS sO hArD fOr YoU kAr  
TC: To SeE aLl tHeSe AmAzInG mIrAcLe LiGhTs  
TC: ThEyRe TrYiNg To ShOw YoU  
TC: ThE tHiNgS tHaT yOuVe BeEn MiSsInG. :O)  
CG: GAMZEE CAN YOU ACT SANE FOR JUST A SECOND.  
CG: I PROMISE IT WON’T HURT.  
TC: WhAtEvEr My BuDdY wAnTs.  
CG: WHERE ARE YOU?  
TC: WiTh ThE oCeAn Of CoLoUrS.  
CG: OKAY. WHERE’S THAT?  
TC: YoU hAvE tO cOmE fInD uS.  
CG: GAMZEE, JUST TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE.  
TC: It HaS tO hApPeN.  
TC: YoU gOt To CoMe To Me KaR, iM sOrRy.  
TC: ThErEs No OtHeR mOtHeRfUcKiNg WaY.  
CG: THIS IS THE WORST CONVERSATION I HAVE HAD WITH YOU SINCE THE SCRATCH.  
CG: I THOUGHT WE WERE PAST THIS, GAMZEE.  
CG: I THOUGHT ALL OF THAT SHIT WAS GONE AND DONE.  
TC: ItS oKaY.  
TC: YoU wAnT tO sEe ThIs KaRkAt. YoU wAnT tO sEe ThE lIgHtS aNd MoThErFuCkInG sPlEnDoUr.  
CG: …  
CG: DO YOU HAVE SOLLUX’S TOOLS WITH YOU?  
TC: ThEyRe RiGhT hErE wItH mE.  
CG: DON’T DROWN THEM.  
CG: I’M COMING TO LOOK FOR YOU.  
TC: HoNk.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling terminallyCapricious [TC] –-

Karkat gets up, swearing under his breath. “I’m going to go look for Gamzee. No one die while I’m gone.”

“Athk him for my thoftcutterth!” Sollux calls to him as he goes out the door.

At first it’s the same as it’s always been. His footsteps are loud on the metallic flooring. His shadow follows him, slower around corners and catching up suddenly. Then the lights flicker, off and on, off and on. It makes him feel uncomfortable. He has been living on the meteor for a sweep with friends who feel the need to decorate everything they use. Now, walking down the hallway alone is intimidating him.

Karkat left his husktop in the room without even thinking about it. As the lights flicker again he becomes suddenly aware of how big the meteor is and how helpless he would be if something serious happened. He has his scythes, sure. He takes one out of his sylladex and rolls the handle absently in his hand, half expecting now to run into Dave and have him laugh at his excessive vigilance.

He walks down the hallway more carefully now, his footsteps resounding quieter and his shadow’s scythe curving menacingly along the wall.

The lights go out.

He hears something and presses his back up against the wall, slipping down so that he’s protecting his body with his knees. The other scythe comes out of his sylladex and he points them outward with his wrists close to his waist. If something comes close to him that he doesn’t hear, they’ll get a scythe to the ankle and he’ll get a warning.

There are footsteps. Constant and sure, they sound like Dave’s. All the same, Karkat curls up more tightly and hates himself for leaving his husktop.

The footsteps stop. He thinks they’re further along down a branch of the corridor. They hadn’t sounded like they were close. His heart tries to beat faster but he stubbornly keeps it normal. He played the game. He is a leader. He has more important shit to worry about than a lab monster that got loose in a blackout. He’ll deal with it, find Gamzee, give Sollux back his precious pair of softcutters and then think about John some more. At the end of the day everyone will go to sleep feeling just as safe as they did when they woke up. Which was pretty damn safe.

After half a minute of quiet, there’s the sound of headphones playing music. Karkat instantly relaxes, listening as someone who can only be Dave puts his headphones in and starts humming to himself. He walks along the hallway like that, his footsteps coming closer. 

Suddenly there’s a crashing sound and the humming stops. All Karkat can hear is the muffled noise of some heavily remixed tune playing through the headphones. After a long minute he hears Dave swearing to himself. The headphones go back on, the footsteps start up again, but this time Dave doesn’t hum as he goes along the hallway.

Karkat smirks to himself, realising that the coolkid had fallen over. If only the lights had been on.

Dave turns a corner and walks away from him. When his footsteps sound distant again there’s that low buzzing and the lights come back on.

Getting to his feet, Karkat goes over to where he thinks Dave had fallen. There’re items scattered across the ground, probably jolted from his modus by the impact. It’s not like he wants anything with a puppet toy or heavily graffitied skateboard. He captchalogues some individually wrapped gushers, a bottle of faygo and one of Dave’s computers - an old one, from before they fixed up an alchemiter and got everyone set up with new, more convenient gear.

He’ll leave the rest for the coolkid to come back for himself. Karkat looks down the hallway and decides to head down it to look for Gamzee. He has no idea where the other troll is and one dimly lit hallway is as good as another.

* * *

You’re seven and a half sweeps old, staring up at the sky and the meteor burning through it. You squint up at it until you hear your mobile line. Taking it out, you check the messages your friends left you.

AC: i - d i d n t - w a n t - t o - b e l i e v e - y o u |  
AC: b u t - a - h i v e - c l o s e - t o - m i n e - h a s - b e e n - d e s t r o y e d |  
AC: w h a t - d o - w e - n e e d - t o - d o |  
AC: t h e y - a r e - t e l l i n g - e v e r y o n e - i n - m y - l a w n r i n g - t o - b o a r d - o n e - o f - t h e - m i l i t a r y - s h i P s |  
AC: o n l y - m i d b l o o d s - o r - h i g h e r - w i l l - b e - a c c e P t e d |  
AC: i - d o n t - w a n t - a l l - o f - t h e s e - P e o P l e - t o - d i e |  
AC: j o h n - i - d o n t - w a n t - t o - d i e |  
AC: i f - t h e r e - i s - a n y t h i n g - t h a t - w e - ca n - d o - P l e a s e - t e l l - m e |

TC: my luSuS haS gon3 crazy  
TC: h3 waS fin3 thiS aft3rnoon and now h3S trying to hurt me  
TC: i dont think h3 r3cogniS3S m3  
TC: h3S juSt laShing out lik3 im attacking him but im not, i would n3v3r do that  
TC: you dont n33d to worry about m3 b3cauS3 i will b3 ok no matt3r what happ3nS  
TC: but if you could com3 and h3lp m3 with him i would b3 grat3ful  
TC: i hop3 your3 hat3 dat3 tonight go3S w3ll  
TC: 

AC: i - r e a l l y  
AC: j o h n |  
AC: i - n e e d - y o u - t o - a t - l e a s t - t e l l - m e - t h a t - y o u - a r e - s a f e |  
AC: i - n e e d - t o - k n o w - t h a t - y o u - a r e - a l i v e |  
AC: j u s t - o n e - l e t t e r - w i l l - d o |  
AC: w h a t e v e r - h a P P e n s - i - h o P e - w e - b o t h - m a k e - i t - o u t - o f - h e r e |  
AC: P l e a s e - d o n t - t e l l - l i r o |  
AC: h e s - s a f e - w h e r e - h e - i s - a n d - i - d o n t - w a n t - t o - w o r r y - h i m - i f - t h e r e s - n o t h i n g - w e - c a n - d o |  
AC: i m - s a y i n g - m y - g o o d b y e s |  
AC: o n l y - P r e P a r i n g - f o r - t h e - w o r s t |  
AC: b u t - h o P i n g - a n d - t r y i n g - f o r - t h e - b e s t |

GA: I do not want to bother you, but I was wondering if you have had a chance to speak to Dulcis Recently?  
GA: She is acting Strangely and I cannot help but feel Concerned.  
GA: Perhaps there is some situation I am Unaware of?  
GA: Please contact me when you are Able.

AC: i don’t know how you knew...and i don’t want to know...  
AC: i’m going to your hive now...i hope you will be there...because i don’t know where else to look for you...  
AC: you and salamandad have to keep safe...  
AC: i think this must be...one of the worst ways to die...

You look up at the meteor again, blinking at it and thinking idly that it would be nice if you could just blink your problems away. Instead of disappearing it just gets bigger and closer.

Salamandad scurries up behind you and makes an unpleasant sound with his throat, striking you in the chest with his thick tail. You stumble backwards and he tries to drag you into the hive. Coming back to yourself, you shake off his grip and run with him to collect whatever you could possibly think to need when your planet and species are being threatened with annihilation.

* * *

Karkat takes out Dave’s computer, trying to find the button to open the screen. It starts up without asking for a password. He’s left himself logged into Trollian and Pesterchum. Faced with such an opportunity it’s hard to think of what to do first.

The Trollian client has a chat window open. Karkat opens it, scratching the touch pad with his nail in the process.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: fk  
TG: whats going on down there  
TG: my camera cuts out and i cant see you or john anymore  
GA: How Unfortunate for you.  
GA: The Condesce has banned clothing and enforced Daily quotas for pailing.  
GA: It is a Veritable orgy of flesh and Sexual apathy.  
TG: cute  
TG: now tell me whats really going on  
GA: I still live in the sea.  
GA: Nothing still happens in the sea.  
GA: There have been no New memos or Notable correspondence between myself and John, or Any of the others.  
GA: Why you would ask such an Inane question, let alone expect me to answer it, is Quite beyond me. 

“Dave has been talking to fish killer?” Karkat mutters disbelievingly. If he had ever suspected that Dave might do such a thing, he would have thought that he would choose to talk to the cave chick. Not the violent sea-dweller he dislikes so much.

TG: i dont expect you to answer it  
TG: i just ask the question and you do  
TG: really you dont have to try so hard to impress me  
TG: its not like im going anywhere  
GA: I’m not going anywhere either.  
GA: Constancy isn’t what I’m looking for, here.  
GA: Ironically enough, it’s just more of the same.  
TG: kill anything today  
TG: any scuttlebeasts too small to fight back  
TG: schools of tiny fish who never did anything to you but swim in the same ocean  
GA: I found an octopus and severed its head from its body.  
GA: It was Amusing Enough to watch its tentacles flail Wildly before Finally realising that the head was Gone and falling Still.  
GA: It made me think of you.  
TG: youre fucked up  
GA: You let me be.  
TG: the only thing i let you do is talk to me  
GA: It’s not a privilege or anything to be earned.  
GA: You wouldn’t let me not talk to you when this started.  
TG: i needed information  
GA: How old are you?  
TG: it doesnt matter  
GA: You know how old I am.  
TG: i know more about you than anyone would want to  
TG: more than your fucking music girl  
TG: you still play nice with her  
TG: open doors tip hats salute to the condesce who youve never even seen  
GA: don’t disrespect her.  
GA: she is worth SO MUCH MORE than you.  
TG: music girl or the troll queen  
TG: better make it clear so i know who im meant to be jealous of  
GA: NEITHER is to DISRESPECTED by your FOUL ALIEN MOUTH  
TG: caps lock i guess were getting serious  
TG: fk you wish you knew how foul my mouth can be  
TG: instead youre swimming around your water house killing animals and pretending that you could make me bleed like that  
TG: you cant touch me  
TG: i bet it drives you crazier than you already fucking are  
GA: YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW  
GA: the things i imagine us doing.  
GA: I imagine tying you up so that you can BARELY BREATHE, hanging you from the ceiling until you’re BEGGING ME to let you down again, to take some of the pressure off your PATHETIC human body. I would CUT OUT EVERY PART OF YOU that you don’t need to live and damage WHATEVER was LEFT. I would make you cry for me so I could TASTE your misery at ever provoking someone who was so far above you in every way. I would kill you before you could apologise but not before you would regret.  
GA: i promise that you WOULD regret EVER trolling ME.  
GA: it was the BIGGEST MISTAKE of your life.  
TG: im literally pretty far above you right now  
TG: exaggerating to impress me huh  
GA: WHY DONT YOU UNDERSTAND.  
TG: i understand it fine  
TG: you want to tie me up i am so fucking okay with that  
TG: and if you can get a rope around me without losing any of your too sharp troll teeth then i deserve to get mutilated the way you say you want me to be  
TG: but you dont want to do that shit  
TG: we both know it  
GA: you dont know ANYTHING about what i want.  
TG: ok lets say we play my way  
TG: in this hypothetical and realistically impossible situation where we meet  
TG: you let me tie you up  
GA: WHY THE FUCK WOULD I DO THAT  
TG: because we would both enjoy it  
TG: so youre tied up on your knees legs locked up tight  
TG: perfect height for a certain something if i didnt know you would try to bite it off  
TG: your hands are behind your back  
TG: maybe you can break free  
TG: but whatever is going on back there youre watching me as i take out a drill  
TG: and i ask you if you know what it does  
GA: Clearly it drills.  
GA: I am not an IDIOT.  
TG: good  
TG: i run it through something just to show you that it works  
TG: and then i come up to you  
TG: standing right where you could reach if your hands werent tied up  
TG: and i ask you  
TG: which horn is your favourite  
GA: what.  
TG: which one fk  
TG: the left one or the right one  
TG: tell me  
TG: if you dont  
TG: ill put the drill down and get out a saw  
TG: rather than having these pretty holes through your horns you could  
TG: i dont know string beads through  
TG: make it easier for me to grip on to  
TG: rather than those  
TG: you could have one of your horns sawn right off  
GA: WHAT THE FUCK  
TG: it wouldnt be clean either  
TG: id leave something there for you to remember it by  
GA: YOU ARE A SICK MOTHERFUCKER  
TG: i know what you want  
TG: so if were ever in that situation unrealistic as it is  
TG: just answer me when i ask you a question  
TG: go on now  
TG: do the stupid emote

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] blocked turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TG: childish

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

Karkat stares at the screen. Before he can think about why it might be a bad idea, his fingers are on the keyboard, mashing the letters together as he types.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began trolling grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS.  
GA: You said you cannot see me anymore.  
GA: What ‘this’ are you talking about?  
TG: ALL OF THIS.  
TG: YOU TWO.  
TG: HORNS.  
TG: WHAT THE FUCK THOUGH.  
TG: I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO THINK RIGHT NOW.  
TG: MY HORNS ARE TOO SMALL FOR HIM TO FUCK UP AND I’M STILL GOING TO FEEL LIKE PROTECTING THEM FROM HIM.  
GA: youre with him there.  
TG: YES.  
GA: and YOURE A TROLL?  
TG: YES, WHY DOES THAT EVEN MATTER.  
TG: I NEED TO WARN THE OTHERS.  
GA: THERE ARE FUCKING OTHERS  
GA: TELL THEM ALL TO STAY AWAY FROM HIM  
GA: if i could i would have claimed him ALREADY but that is APPARENTLY IMPOSSIBLE so all i can do is order you LOUD ANNOYING ONE to KEEP THEM AWAY FROM HIM  
GA: if you fail to do this i will do more to you than fuck with your birthright.  
GA: im a troll i know all our weak places.  
GA: Do you understand me?  
TG: WHAT IS WITH BOTH OF YOU.  
TG: WHY DO YOU WANT HIM AFTER HE THREATENED YOU WITH ALL OF THAT.  
GA: He’s my kismesis.  
GA: So shut the fuck up and make sure he stays that way.  
GA: Give me your name.  
TG: WHAT?  
GA: I order you to tell me your name.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] blocked grandAlacrity [GA] \--

TG: karkat  
TG: what the hell are you doing  
TG: I’M NOT DOING ANYTHING LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE.  
TG: OKAY I COULD POSSIBLY BE PANICKING HERE. THAT IS POSSIBLY A THING THAT COULD BE HAPPENING.  
GA: Is that your name? Karkat?  
GA: That sounds Familiar.  
TG: did you steal my computer  
TG: YOU LEFT IT HERE ASSHOLE.  
TG: ALONG WITH A PUPPET THAT TRIED TO SEXUALLY ASSAULT MY EYES.  
TG: dammit i was going to come back for that stuff  
TG: leave fk alone i dont want you bothering him  
TG: im pretty sure thats something only im meant to do  
TG: YOU’VE COMMANDEERED ENOUGH OF MY CONVERSATIONS WITH JOHN.  
TG: I DIDN’T EVEN DO THIS DELIBERATELY.  
GA: John?  
GA: Oh, I think I understand.  
GA: This is John’s matesprit.  
GA: We have not yet had the opportunity to speak.  
TG: YOU WERE JUST SWEARING AT ME AND NOW YOU’RE ALL POLITENESS.  
GA: I would apologise for that Untoward behaviour if I did not think that you deserved it.  
GA: This is not your account, you did not tell me your name even when I asked for it and you did not comply with the orders that I gave you.  
GA: Unless you reveal yourself to be the Condesce’s heir, My status Automatically supercedes yours.  
TG: oh yeah hey this guy has the same blood colour as me  
GA: But he is not an alien?  
TG: nope  
TG: STRIDER WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU OUTING ME TO A SEA-DWELLER FOR?  
TG: DO YOU REALISE HE HAS AN OBLIGATION TO THE HEMOSPECTRUM ON WHICH MUCH OF OUR SOCIETY IS BASED TO CULL ME?  
GA: Why are you associating with him?  
TG: bad luck i guess  
GA: Does John know?  
TG: honestly i dont think it would ever come up  
TG: OF COURSE MY MATESPRIT KNOWS. HOW THE FUCK DID YOU THINK I WAS GOING TO HIDE THAT?  
TG: you pailed him  
GA: DID YOU PAIL HIM?  
TG: IT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.  
TG: I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU TWO ARE CALIGINOUS. HOW DID NONE OF US REALISE THAT WAS GOING ON?  
TG: unlike you i do know how to be stealthy  
GA: It’s not Precisely Common knowledge here, either.  
TG: john knows  
TG: he didnt tell you  
TG: hmmmmm  
TG: I WON’T TELL ANYONE ABOUT THIS, IF I ALSO DON’T HAVE TO CLAIM DAVE FOR THE FISH KILLER.  
TG: AMONG OTHER REASONS WHY I’M NOT EXCITED TO DO THAT,  
TG: I’M PRETTY SURE JOHN WOULD BE UPSET WITH ME.  
TG: deal  
TG: fk say deal  
GA: Deal.  
TG: oh hey karkat  
TG: guess what i found  
TG: SOMEONE WHO GIVES A SHIT ABOUT THAT STUPID QUESTION.  
TG: you left your laptop here  
TG: nice going  
TG: closing it doesnt turn it off you know  
TG: you have to change the settings if you want that to happen  
TG: oh look heres a chat window with john, the love of your life  
TG: LEAVE MY HUSKTOP ALONE.  
TG: my boyfriend worked it out in a couple of lines  
TG: lets see how long it takes john to figure out im just a guy using caps lock

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] has gone offline --

Unwilling to leave his husktop and potentially the future of his relationship in Dave’s hands, Karkat stands up and starts to head back through the hallways.

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] \--

TT: You have to hurry.  
TG: rose im sitting right across from you  
TT: Not you.

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] has gone offline --

Cursing under his breath whoever made Dave Strider, he captchalogues the computer and goes back to looking for Gamzee.

* * *

> Tripel: Calm down lusus.

You’re trying to do that!

“Shoosh, baby, shoosh, come on, you have to settle down now,” you tell it, holding your hands up, palms out, so he can see that you won’t hurt him. He crashes around, clicking furiously, dragging his mandibles along the walls of your home. His wings stretch out joltingly, like he’s going to try to fly, but he should know that he doesn’t have the room for it. If this goes on all he will do is hurt himself.

“It’s me, Tripel, it’s okay, come on, please stop doing that, I’m really getting worried! Shoosh, shoosh, nothing’s happening...”

He shrieks at you and bashes his head into your weapons drawer. Fortunately you’ve already captchalogued anything around your hive that could be dangerous and the drawer is empty. The impact breaks open the skin along his first segment and he bleeds red onto the floor.

You shut your eyes tightly at the sight of it.

> Tripel: Heal lusus.

You open your eyes and send a gentle wave of psionic power over him. The wound heals and he stops, clicking faintly and tilting his head in your direction. For a moment, just a moment, you think both of you will be okay. But he lunges at you and you have to dodge before he cuts himself again on your horns.

“Stop! It’s okay, it’s alright, there’s really nothing going on. Please, I don’t know why you’re like this!”

Your mobile device shakes with a message.

> Tripel: Answer troll.

You take out your mobile device, with one hand still stretched out to your crazed lusus.

TC:  
AA: trip some really bad stuff is happening.  
AA: you're not safe where you are.  
AA: i need you to get out.  
AA: come here if you can.

You are only able to read this much before your lusus’ wing catches your arm and tangles up with it. Thinking that you are attacking him, he becomes even wilder, shrieking unendingly in your direction. You gasp and try to free yourself but he wrenches you up and over him. The pain is awful when you impact with the ceiling, then fall to the ground.

The wounds are healed in seconds but you can still feel the echoes of pain. You’re caught off guard at the feeling of it - shocked that your lusus could do this - unsure of what John was trying to tell you - scared as hell that your lusus might never come back to you.

Your mobile device, still loosely held in your hand, shakes with a message.

> Tripel: Answer troll.

Above you your lusus is spinning, trying to see where the threat has gone. His feet press into your limbs but they’re light and wouldn’t do anything more than bruise you. Angrily, he knocks into the cocoon which you had cleaned up and kept for him. It’s weaker now than when he hatched from it and tears easily in half.

You shift your hand slightly to see the screen of your mobile device.

AA: there are all these meteors.  
AA: dull says some of the hives are already gone.  
AA: we're not safe.  
AA: it's probably why your lusus is fighting you.  
AA: if you can, get to dull's hive.  
AA: that's where me, salamandad and cal are going now.  
AA: she says there are ships.  
AA: i don't know what other chance we have.

You sit up in surprise, immediately checking your SURVIVOR MODUS for the APPLEFRUIT OF STRANGE TELEPORTATIONAL PROPERTIES. You breathe out in relief when you see that it’s still there. The sound draws your lusus’ attention and he turns back to you.

“John says we need to leave, baby, please tell me you remember him. I know that you’re scared but we need to go, come on, we’ll get out of here, we’ll go somewhere safe-”

He lashes out at you, cutting into your neck. You cry out and try to stop the blood with your hand, hating the feel of it, the smell of it. Without your ability you know the wound would have been fatal. As it is you get shakily to your feet and go to the entrance of the cavern.

He follows you like you hoped he would.

Your mobile device shakes with a message.

AA: trip  
AA: please tell me you've read this and you're coming.  
TC: im on my  
TC: way  
TC: i think i have  
TC: sniekjz’  
TC: sbpq  
TC:  
TC:  
TC:

You brush the tears from your face with bloodied fingers and run as fast as you can, looking over your shoulder often to make sure your lusus is behind you. It’s too hard to type and run at the same time. You’ll just have to tell John when you get there.

* * *

TC:  
TC:  
AA: trip  
AA: oh shit are you okay  
AA: you can't be the one that gets hurt  
AA: you're the only one of us i really believe will always be safe

You stare at your mobile line, horrified. Then there’s a hand on your arm, pulling you sharply forward. You still don’t know if Callat can talk, but he clicks at you and that says enough. He wants you to move faster. He wants you to concentrate on what you’re meant to be doing. He’s disappointed that he had to come back for you and tell you all of this.

You nod and he goes ahead of you again, easily scaling the wall of a hive so that he can see what’s going on around you. Half of the time you don’t know where he is, but you trust that he can take care of himself and both of you will do everything you can to make it through this.

AA: be okay.  
AA: 

You go to another chat window.

AC: b u t - h o P i n g - a n d - t r y i n g - f o r - t h e - b e s t |

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] is now idle --

AA: we're close to your hive.  
AC: i - a m - s t i l l - h e r e |  
AC: t h e - d r o n e s - a r e - c i r c l i n g - t h e - l a w n r i n g |  
AC: i - w a s - t o l d - t h e y - a r e - c u l l i n g - a n y o n e - t h e y - f i n d |  
AC: m y - n e i g h b o u r s - a r e - t r y i n g - t o - d e s t r o y - t h e m |  
AA: stay away from the fighting if you can.  
AA: when we get there we can think about what we want to do.  
AC: c a l l a t - w o n t - b e - l e t - o n - t h e - s h i P s |  
AC: t h e y - w o u l d - t a k e - y o u r - l u s u s - b e c a u s e - y o u - a r e - a - h i g h b l o o d |  
AC: b u t - c a l l a t - a n d - t r i P e l - w o u l d - b e - c u l l e d - o n - a t t e m P t i n g - t o - b o a r d |  
AA: it's okay.  
AA: we'll think of something.

* * *

> Dulcis: Wait.

You sit inside your hive, looking out your window at the applefruit orchard you have cared for all of your life. All of these memories... You will lose them if you leave and still lose them if you die. You honestly don’t want to do either. 

AA: we'll think of something.  
AC: t h a n k - y o u |  
AA: what for?  
AC: y o u r e - a l w a y s - t a k i n g - c a r e - o f - m e |  
AC: i t s - a - s h a m e - w e - w e r e - n o t - c l o s e r |  
AA: you taught me how to play an instrument when i was four and a half sweeps old.  
AA: no one else i know could have done that.  
AA: no one else i know would’ve done that.  
AC: a h |  
AA: im really grateful for you dull.  
AA: you're one of my closest friends and i have some great memories with you.  
AC: i - f e e l - t h e - s a m e - w a y |  
AC: s o - t h a n k - y o u |  
AA: thank you too!  
AA: i'll see you soon, okay?  
AA: :)

You breathe out slowly, watching the leaves of the trees swaying in the wind.

> Dulcis: Answer troll.

\-- grandAlacrity [GA] began trolling acapellaControvert [AC] \--

GA: I would like to know what is going on.  
GA: Your Earlier message was Unusual, though I Very Much appreciated the reminder of your feelings.  
GA: Now I am Unable to contact John.  
GA: Naturally I wonder if the two events are Connected.  
AC: h e l l o - l i r o |  
GA: Hello, Dulcis.  
GA: Would you please tell me Immediately what is happening?  
AC: a s - j o h n - P r e d i c t e d - m e t e o r s - a r e - r a v a g i n g - a l t e r n i a |  
AC: m y - l a w n r i n g - i s - i n - d a n g e r - o f - b e i n g - c o m P l e t e l y - d e s t r o y e d |  
AC: i - a m - a b l e - t o - e v a c u a t e - o n - o n e - o f - t h e - c o n d e s c e s - f l e e t s h i P s - b e c a u s e - i - a m - a - m i d b l o o d |  
AC: a t - t h e - m o m e n t - i - a m - w a i t i n g - f o r - j o h n |  
GA:  
AC: l i r o |  
GA: Thank you for your honesty.  
AC: i - t h i n k - y o u - a r e - s a f e |  
AC: s o - i - d i d - n o t - w a n t - t o - a l a r m - y o u |  
GA: That was Considerate of you.  
GA: It is True that I am now Rather Alarmed.  
AC: i - t h o u g h t - t h a t - y o u - w o u l d - b e |

* * *

> Lirode: Be alarmed.

Shouting every swearword that you know, you punch through the wall of your hive. It immediately angers you that it was fragile enough to be broken by even your powerful fist. You pick up every one of your decorative weapons and throw them at the wall, laughing bitterly when a rusted sword breaks. They are purely decorative, after all.

You are as angry as you could possibly be while still being capable of rational thought.

AC: i - t h o u g h t - t h a t - y o u - w o u l d - b e |  
GA: Would you like me to go to you?  
AC: i - w i l l - b e - f i n e |  
AC: j o h n - s a y s - h e - i s - n e a r l y - h e r e |  
GA: It is Unfortunate that you cannot stay with me here in Apparent safety.  
AC: y e s |  
GA: Please tell John that I am Willing to offer Any assistance.  
AC: t h a n k - y o u |  
GA: <3  
AC: <3  
GA: I would not know what to do without you.  
GA: I both want and need you to stay Close to me.  
AC: i - h a v e - n e v e r - P i t i e d - a n y o n e - a s - m u c h - a s - y o u |  
AC: i - w o u l d - n o t - w a n t - t o - b e - w i t h o u t - y o u - e i t h e r |  
AC: <3  
GA: <3  
AC: i - a m - b e i n g - m e s s a g e d - b y - j o h n |  
GA: Go ahead and answer him.  
GA: I will talk to you again Later.

It would be difficult to say which you want more - to have Dulcis here with you, safe where you can see her, or to be able to talk to your kismesis, who you both blame and want answers from. You know now why he messaged you asking about what he could not see. That he knew this would happen to you, your friends and your planet makes your blood boil.

Though you know it is futile, you try to send a message to his trolltag.

‘Message to turntechGodhead [TG] has failed to send.’

‘Message to turntechGodhead [TG] has failed to send.’

‘Message to turntechGodhead [TG] has failed to send.’

‘Message to turntechGodhead [TG] has failed to send. Failure to send a message will occur if the trolltag does not exist. Check that there are no spelling mistakes in the trolltag you are attempting to message. Alternatively, failure will occur if you have been blocked by this client user.’

‘Message to turntechGodhead [TG] has failed to send. Accept that you have been blocked by this client user.’

“HE HASN’T BLOCKED ME!” you shout frustratedly.

Stupid selectively useful god client.


	11. Active

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling atlasAppleby [AA] \--

CG: JOHN  
AA: i'm sorry i cant talk to you right now.  
CG: DO YOU NOT WANT TO HEAR THE SPECIAL MATESPRIT INSULTS THAT I HAVE FOR YOU  
AA: whatever that is, not when i'm trying to beat meteors.  
AA: i'll message you later if i can.  
CG: DID THE METEORS START FALLING ALREADY  
CG: FK TOLD ME NOTHING WAS HAPPENING  
AA: who's fk?  
CG: SHORT FOR FISH KILLER  
AA: liro?  
CG: I THINK SO  
AA: i didn't know you guys talked.  
CG: WE DO A LOT MORE THAN THAT  
AA: just don't let him threaten you.  
AA: he does that to everyone, so don't take it too seriously.  
CG: DOES HE  
AA: yeah it's just a sea-dweller thing.  
AA: he can't really help it.  
AA: he's got good intentions though i swear.  
CG: IF YOU SAY SO JOHN MY LOVE  
AA: it's weird of you to use that word.  
CG: IM JUST SO OVERWHELMED BY ALL THIS APOCALYPSE BUSINESS  
AA: you don't have to worry about me.  
AA: it's sweet, but there are ships here to take us off planet.  
AA: as long as i don't run into any of the drones i'll be okay.  
AA: i'm worried about cal though.  
CG: WHOS CAL  
AA: my kismesis? i told you about him  
AA: he's been on the board too, i thought you would have seen that.  
CG: YOU MEAN NEW GUY  
AA: his name is callat but i call him big cal.  
AA: i find it really funny for some reason.  
CG: YOU DID NOT CALL HIM THAT  
CG: JOHN THAT SHIT IS NOT CASH  
CG: TAKE THAT SHIT TO THE BANK AND THEYLL TELL YOU MAN  
CG: THEYLL TELL YOU NOT TO GO NAMING YOUR HATE BOYFRIEND AFTER YOUR HUMAN FRIENDS BROS EVIL PUPPET  
AA: uhh...  
CG: I HAVE HAD NIGHTMARES ABOUT HIM JOHN  
CG: IM PRETTY SURE GAMZEE HAS HIM HIDDEN AWAY SOMEWHERE  
CG: THE POWER WAS OUT A LITTLE WHILE AGO AND I SWEAR TO YOUR TROLL QUEEN I SAW HIS EYES STARING OUT AT ME IN THE DARK  
CG: IT WAS LIKE I WAS A KID AGAIN AND HE WAS HUNTING ME  
CG: BRO NOWHERE TO BE SEEN  
AA: yeah okay.  
AA: i didn't know any of that but i can guess that you're strider.  
CG: cool  
AA: hey man.  
CG: whats up  
AA: meteors falling from the sky.  
CG: thats shitty  
AA: kind of have to pay attention to them now.  
CG: you do what you have to  
CG: i hope you make it up here  
AA: do you think that's possible?  
CG: jegus john is you being there in the first place possible  
CG: its not about that  
CG: its about what you can do  
AA: that's really great advice.  
CG: you told us that once  
AA: i sound pretty cool!  
CG: you were lamer than the movies you were always watching  
CG: but youre my bro  
CG: you had your moments  
AA: thanks!  
AA: i have to go now.  
CG: good luck  
AA: :)

\-- atlasAppleby [AA] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

* * *

The meteors are like bullets, fired from the gun of some unseen god. They devastate everything they touch. Trees fall, buildings collapse, seas are shaken, people are killed. 

Fleetships are destroyed before they can take off. Whoever was in them survives long enough to be dragged out and culled by the patrolling drones. Their screams cannot be heard over the explosive impact of meteors around them.

A girl sits in her hive, singing softly to herself so that she won’t feel scared. Her friend rushes in and hugs her before he says anything. He’s followed by a lusus and another boy.

They go downstairs together and out into the applefruit orchard. Walking underneath the trees she remembers when they were struck and in turn struck her. Her hand is touched by the other boy, who leans over and whispers in her ear.

“I feel safe with you.”

She believes him and winds her fingers into his.

Soon they are joined by another girl and her lusus. She is tired, dirty and bloodied. They call out to her just as a meteor crashes into the edge of the orchard.

The trees creak and some of them fall, pushing into each other and shaking the fruit from their branches. The girl screams and covers her face. At the same time the lusus startles, charging fiercely into the trunk of a tree because he thinks that it has threatened him. It topples. The girl and boy are pushed out of the way. They watch as the one who had saved them is crushed. His indigo blood pools out around him.

The lusi fight, scratching and biting at each other.

The other girl goes to the dying boy. Her power pulses out over him, but all it can do is prolong his inevitable death. He gasps out words to her and she cries even though she can’t understand all of them.

Meteors keep falling all around them.

* * *

> Dulcis: Answer message.

With trembling hands you open the message.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] began messaging acapellaControvert [AC] \--

EM: YOU HAVE TO KISS HIM.

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] blocked earthlyMinistrator [EM] \--

* * *

You are now me. By which I mean that you are now the writer. As you already know, your name is EMMA. You are a HUMAN GIRL living on an ALTERNATE VERSION OF EARTH, which you’re happy to say is not often assaulted with meteors, self-perpetuating games or psychotic nobility. Your life is about as ORDINARY as a life can be. Or it was, until you became OMNISCIENT through a PROGRAMMING ACCIDENT, and consequently PERSONALLY RESPONSIBLE for the lives and wellbeing of the people you found yourself watching.

When you are not WORKING at your job of being a PROFESSIONAL MINISTRATOR, you are reading A CERTAIN WEBCOMIC or embarking on METAPHORICAL CONQUEST. You’ve had to put a lot of hours in lately though, because you have an AVERSION TO TIME LOOPS. You are an authority on how annoying those things can get.

Your screen name is earthlyMinistrator and you’re fairly straightforward (most of the time).

> Emma: Look at god client.

At the moment you are watching the meteors fall on your laptop screen. The TITANIUM CLIENT you are using is a simple interface with direction buttons for the camera and everyone’s timelines arranged in categories and subcategories.

The categories are ACTIVE, INACTIVE, FUTURE, ALTERNATE and DOOMED. The subcategories for each one are Alternia, Earth, Laboratory and Other. You are in the process of introducing subsubcategories A, B, C and D.

There are also links to pages for CHAT LOGS, BOARDS and PERSONAL NOTES.

> Emma: Message Dulcis.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] began messaging acapellaControvert [AC] \--

EM: YOU HAVE TO KISS HIM.

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] blocked earthlyMinistrator [EM] \--

“Damn!” you say and put your hand on your face. Blocking doesn’t work against you, but time does. You need her to listen to you, otherwise John will stay dead and the timeline will be doomed.

There’s only one thing you can do.

> Emma: Do the only thing you can do.

Sighing loudly and repeatedly, you go to an earlier point in Dulcis’ timeline. The camera shows you that she is walking through the applefruit orchard for the first time after Lady Mary de Wing’s tragic death. You wait until John’s dream self disappears and message her again. Or for the first time, depending on who and when you are.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] began messaging acapellaControvert [AC] \--

EM: Hello, Dulcis.  
AC: h e l l o |  
AC: h o w - d o - y o u - k n o w - m y - n a m e |  
EM: I know many things. Past, present and future.  
AC: i - d o - n o t - b e l i e v e - y o u |  
EM: It’s difficult to understand and honestly pretty annoying to explain.  
EM: But I’ll answer any questions you might have.  
AC: h o w - d o - y o u - h a v e - m y - t r o l l t a g |  
EM: I have the username of every person that lives and will live in your world.  
AC: i - t h i n k - i - w i l l - b l o c k - y o u |  
EM: Oh, don’t do that!  
AC: y o u - a r e - b e i n g - v e r y - v a g u e |  
AC: w h y - s h o u l d - i - c o n t i n u e - t o - t a l k - t o - y o u - i f - y o u - a r e - n o t - g o i n g - t o - P r o P e r l y - a n s w e r - m y - q u e s t i o n s |  
EM: You aren’t asking questions that I can answer properly.  
AC: w h y - a m - i - b e i n g - b l a m e d - f o r - y o u r - P o o r - r e s P o n s e s |  
EM: You’re right. I’m sorry, that was rude.  
EM: I’m just a little tense.  
EM: I need you to listen to me now, because something important happens to you later.  
AC: w h a t - i s - i t |  
EM: John dies.  
AC: w h y - s h o u l d - i - b e l i e v e - y o u |  
EM: Because if you don’t, he stays dead!  
AC: t h a t - m a k e s - n o - s e n s e |  
EM: Does having a strange looking boy float around your house and play the instrument on your roof with surprising proficiency make any sense?  
AC: i - s u P P o s e - n o t |  
AC: d o - y o u - k n o w - w h o - h e - i s |  
EM: Yes.  
EM: He is the human version of your friend John.  
EM: He’s referred to as a ‘dream self’. Whenever John sleeps, his consciousness transfers to that boy, who is a physical remnant of his previous life.  
AC: i t - i s - n o t - P o s s i b l e - t h a t - h e - i s - h i s - a n c e s t o r |  
EM: Nothing is impossible, just very unlikely.  
EM: I’m not sure if you will believe what I’m about to tell you.  
EM: John was born a human on a planet called Earth. When he was a teenager he came across a machine, which sent him back in time and space to live life as a troll on Alternia.  
EM: This is the second time John is alive (unless you count all his doomed selves).  
AC: i - t h i n k - i t - w o u l d - b e - s e n s i b l e - t o - b l o c k - y o u |  
EM: I wish you wouldn’t.  
AC: s o - t h e - b o y - i - j u s t - s a w - i s - a - h u m a n |  
EM: Yes!  
EM: That’s what John looked like before he became a troll.  
AC: o h |  
AC: t h i s - i s - a - l i t t l e - e m b a r r a s s i n g |  
EM: I won’t tell anyone that you liked him.  
AC: t h a n k - y o u |  
AC: w h y - d o e s - h e - d i s a P P e a r |  
EM: When John wakes up, his dream self goes to a place that doesn’t exist (at least, not yet).  
EM: He ‘sleeps’ there until John goes to sleep again.  
EM: They’re the inverse of each other, if that makes any sense.  
AC: i t - i s - r e a s o n a b l y - c o h e r e n t |  
EM: Great!  
AC: s o - y o u - a r e - t e l l i n g - m e - t h i s - b e c a u s e - j o h n - i s - i n - d a n g e r - o f - d y i n g |  
EM: He has to die. It’s important.  
EM: There are all kinds of time loops which wouldn’t be closed if he didn’t.  
EM: Dangerous, stupid, annoying time loops which affect everyone in the alpha and beta universes.  
EM: I’m telling you this so that you will trust me and do what I tell you to do.  
AC: w h e t h e r - i - t r u s t - y o u - o r - n o t - i s - n o t - g o i n g - t o - b e - d e t e r m i n e d - b y - o n e - c o n v e r s a t i o n |  
AC: a n d - i - w o n t - j u s t - d o - w h a t - o t h e r - P e o P l e - t e l l - m e - t o |  
AC: g o o d b y e |

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] has gone offline --

EM: Damn!

That attempt at using a time loop to save John was unsuccessful, but you’re not about to give up on this timeline, no sir. You message Dulcis earlier than you did the first time, or the second time, depending on who you are. This time she is sitting in her hive waiting for the others.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] began messaging acapellaControvert [AC] \--

EM: It’s important that you listen to me.  
AC: i - d o n t - k n o w - w h o - y o u - a r e |  
EM: I talked to you almost a sweep ago.  
AC: w e - d i s c u s s e d - j o h n |  
EM: Yes!  
AC: i - h a v e - n o t - s e e n - t h e - o t h e r - j o h n - f o r - s e a s o n s |  
EM: He woke up and now John dreams normally.  
EM: Well. Normal is a relative word.  
AC: i - d o - n o t - h a v e - t i m e - t o - i n d u l g e - y o u |  
AC: m e t e o r s - a r e - f a l l i n g |  
AC: y o u - s h o u l d - b e - g e t t i n g - t o - s a f e t y - i n s t e a d - o f - t r o l l i n g - m e |  
EM: I’m quite safe. The meteors aren’t anywhere near me.  
EM: Dulcis, I need to talk to you again about John.  
AC: i s - t h a t - s o |  
EM: He dies today.  
AC: i t - i s - P o s s i b l e - t h a t - n o n e - o f - u s - w i l l - s u r v i v e |  
EM: Regardless, John’s death doesn’t need to be permanent.  
EM: You can save him.  
AC: a l r i g h t |  
AC: w h a t - w o u l d - i - n e e d - t o - d o |  
EM: You have to kiss him.

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] blocked earthlyMinistrator [EM] \--

> Emma: Vent.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] began messaging tentacleTherapist [TT] \--

EM: I AM TRYING AND FAILING TO SAVE JOHN’S LIFE RIGHT NOW.  
EM: THIS IS WHY I DON’T USE TIME LOOPS.  
EM: DAMMIT.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] ceased messaging tentacleTherapist [TT] \--

TT: I might understand your frustration if you put it into context.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] began messaging tentacleTherapist [TT] \--

EM: I started a time loop with a troll so that she would prevent John from permanently dying, but she won’t listen to me.  
TT: Is John in mortal danger?  
EM: Of course he’s in mortal danger.  
EM: There are huge pieces of rock crushing houses where he is.  
EM: It’s a little bit more than rain.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] ceased messaging tentacleTherapist [TT] \--

TT: Sarcasm isn’t going to help him.  
TT: I hope you weren’t talking to the troll like that.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] began messaging tentacleTherapist [TT] \--

EM: The timeline will be doomed unless she listens to me.  
TT: Which ‘she’ are you referring to?  
EM: It doesn’t matter.  
EM: If John lives he’ll tell you all about it.  
TT: If it isn’t working with her, why don’t you communicate the information to one of the other trolls?  
EM: Anyone else and it’ll doom the timeline.  
EM: It has to be her.  
TT: Clearly then you only have one option available to you.  
EM: I AM NOT STARTING ANOTHER TIME LOOP.  
TT: You don’t seem to have a choice.

You say “DAMMIT!” very loudly and try one more time.

* * *

> Dulcis: Answer message.

Almost as soon as you block them, you are messaged again by the strange blue text person.

\-- earthlyMinistrator [EM] began messaging acapellaControvert [AC] \--

EM: I’m sorry, I’m really sorry, but this is so important.  
EM: Many people will die unless you save John.  
EM: This is the only way.  
EM: I don’t want him to die either.  
EM: But if he has to, don’t let it be permanent.  
EM: You can bring him back. You just have to kiss him.  
AC: t h i s - i s - r i d i c u l o u s - a n d - c o m P l e t e l y - i n s e n s i t i v e |  
AC: w h y - s h o u l d - i - b e l i e v e - y o u |  
AC: i f - y o u r e - w r o n g - o r - l y i n g - i - w i l l - h a v e - d i s r e s P e c t e d - m y - f r i e n d s - l i f e l e s s - b o d y |  
EM: He saved your life. Even if there’s only a chance that it will work, don’t you want to try to save his?

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] blocked earthlyMinistrator [EM] \--

> Dulcis: Mourn appropriately.

You sit with John, shifting so that his head rests in your lap. He looks up at you and smiles as you push his hair back from his face. The life goes out of him and he stills, blood running from his body into your leg and the dirt.

You don’t know why you do it, but you lean forward and kiss him.

The colour comes back into his face. His wounds heal. Air pushes through his lungs and blood pulses out from his heart. Somehow you are not kissing John anymore, you are kissing the boy. His pale skin, which you were never able to touch, is soft underneath your fingers. His eyes, which you were never able to see, are John’s blue but gentler.

You gasp, jolting forward even before you feel the intense pain spreading out from your back. There’s liquid on your skin, underneath your clothes. It’s warm when you feel cold, so cold. It’s like holding onto Liro when you’re in the water with him.

Your cheek presses against John’s chest, who is not the boy anymore but John, your dearest friend. His fingers stroke your hair and your surprise-widened eyes close. Wind brushes past your ear and in it you can hear a song, played over and over, lovingly, just for you.

You listen to it, without ever realising that you are dying.

* * *

> Tripel: Heal Dulcis.

You’re tired from healing yourself and wasting so much power on John. Only the shock of seeing her fall forward, teal spilling out from her back, keeps you from passing out. You can’t save her. This is the the first time you could have saved someone other than yourself and you can’t do it. 

Worse than that, it was your lusus that killed her. 

It’s completely your fault that she’s dead.

John sits up, cradling her and gesturing at the tree half on top of him. Wind gusts at it, lifting it up and safely away. You can’t bring yourself to be surprised that he’s alive or his clothes are different or that he’s now apparently some kind of wind magician.

When Cal culls your lusus with precise movements of his knife, all you can do is look away, feeling more useless than you ever have in your too-long life.

* * *

whoooooooooOOOOOOOOOOoooOOOOOOOOOssh  
oooooOOOOooooooOOOOOOOSSSSSSSHHHHHHHH

You can hear the wind rising, pushing louder and faster. It somehow becomes a part of you in a way it never was before, going _inside_ of you, filling your lungs. You are so full of its energy it overflows, making your heart beat impossibly fast and your crushed organs reassemble themselves in quick healing that Trip never could have managed. The wind holds you together, brings you back to life, comforts you with its familiarity when the memories come rushing back, strong images and feelings that were lost to you, but never to this other part with which you have finally been reunited.

Dave trying to teach you a secret bro handshake that you kept messing up.

Rose talking to you about the game, helping you with feelings you didn’t even realise you had.

Jade hugging you and laughing with you at a joke only the two of you thought was funny.

Karkat scowling. Karkat swearing. Karkat blushing. Karkat frowning. Karkat and Gamzee. Karkat threatening. Karkat shouting. Karkat looking down at you, red tears on his grey skin, eyes wide with fear and another emotion that you only now, really, genuinely, understand.

Karkat in the dream bubble. Karkat, your matesprit.

You suddenly understand everything.

You lift the tree up and away from you almost without thought, looking at Dulcis, who saved you, who goes rigid with shock, her fingers curling up minutely in odd little twitches. She falls forward, cheek against your chest. You know that she is dying. If you were Dave maybe you could do something to save her but all you have is you and the wind.

You run your fingers gently through her hair and her expression softens. When her eyes close you remember that song she always played for you, that she tried to teach you when you were four and a half sweeps old, that you played for her unconsciously.

You play it for her again, stroking her hair, until she dies.

> John: Listen to Trip.

Her hands are coated in dirt, tears and blue and brown blood. A small, unassuming apple sits in them and she holds it out to you. The only difference that you can see between it and all the others hanging up around you is that it’s a strange gold colour. You take it because it seems like she wants you to, then ask, “Trip? Why are you giving me this?”

“It’s magic,” she says, looking down at the ground.

“Trip, I don’t think-”

Her stubborn eyes come up to meet yours. “It is! Shit, John, I don’t know what’s happening right now. I don’t know why you’re alive again, never mind whatever the fuck you just did. I don’t know how I could have been so ridiculously stupid, bringing my lusus here and then not keeping an eye on him. I don’t...I really don’t know what’s happening, what I’m doing. But John, listen to me. I know it sounds fucked up, kind of crazy, but I _know_ magic exists.” She gestures at the apple you’re holding. “I took a bite of that and it sent me somewhere. Not Alternia.”

“What?” you ask breathlessly. “Where?”

“I spat it out and came right back. It was weird as shit and I don’t want to go there, but if it’s that or the drones...”

“What did you see?”

“There was this, uh, hornless troll there-”

“Oh my god,” you say and stare at the apple.

“John?”

You shift Dulcis’ body so that she is on the ground, then you stand up and walk around the orchard.

“John, that didn’t make any sense.”

You search the trees for more of the golden apples, ignoring the trunks that were split in half or shredded by the meteor that crashed just a little while ago.

“John! What are you doing?”

> John: Be the Titan.

You find three of them, hanging close together on a tree.

> John: Bear the weight of the celestial spheres.

You pick the apples and carry them back to Trip and Cal. When you sit down, cross-legged, you hand one of them to Cal. He takes it without saying anything. That doesn’t surprise either of you. Although you’re dealing with more important things right now, it still makes you angry that even in an apocalypse he won’t say a word.

“Trip and I are safe from the poison,” you tell him.

“But that’s not–!” 

Using his knife, Cal makes a small cut into the fruit and rubs it along his finger. He hisses lowly and his skin blisters. Still, he puts his knife away and nods at you.

“You don’t suddenly get immune to poison,” Trip looks like she’s going to be sick with worry. “John, you’re a highblood. Get on one of the ships. I’ll try the applefruit and see if it takes me anywhere good. Or I could stay here with Cal and we could try our luck against the drones.”

There’s a lot that you have to tell her, but you don’t know how to begin.

_I died and now I’m god tier so I can’t die anymore._

_Actually I just got back all my memories of my past life and these magic apples are our only chance._

_I’m a human in a troll body and twice your age. You should listen to your elders, ha ha._

_I have to get back to the meteor and this might be the only way._

“You just have to trust me, Trip. I can’t explain it right now,” you say quietly. “The meteors are going to destroy Alternia and no one left here will survive it. I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think the ships are safe either. We have to try the apples. Please, you have to do this. I’m not going to leave you here.”

After a long, drawn-out moment, she nods.

“When we get there I want you to take care of Cal first, alright?”

“I can’t–”

“Trust me on this. It’s really important.”

When Trip murmurs her agreement, you give one of the apples to Salamandad. He blows a bubble at you big enough to encase your head. Inside it all sound is muffled, but soon it pops loudly and he blows another smaller one on your cheek. You pat his fringe, laughing. Then he flits around to Cal, nudging him with his head and smiling. 

In what is to you a truly touching moment of familial love and cross-cultural generosity, Cal takes a flyingbeast carcass from his modus and offers it up to Salamandad. He accepts it graciously, hugging Cal with his tail and making those communicative noises at the back of his throat. Satisfied, he runs off, apple in mouth and carcass in claw.

> John: Eat the applefruit.

The troll half of you is screaming not to let the fruit anywhere near you.

The human half of you doesn’t get what the big deal is.


	12. Future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've come to the final chapter! I hope you enjoy it.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling terminallyCapricious [TC] \--

CG: ARE YOU STILL IN THE LABORATORY?  
CG: I’M LOOKING FOR YOU BUT I’M GOING TO NEED SOME HELP.  
TC: YoUrE gOiNg ThE pErFeCt WaY.  
TC: I kNoW iT, kAr. ThIs Is ThE rIgHt MoThErFuCkInG tHiNg.  
CG: UNLESS YOU CAN SEE ME YOU CAN’T KNOW WHERE I’M GOING.  
TC: YoUrE cOmInG, nOt GoInG.  
TC: YoUrE cOmInG hErE.  
TC: So I kNoW tHe WaY yOuRe On Is ThE rIgHt WaY.  
CG: THAT’S THE KIND OF FUCKED UP LOGIC I KNOW TO EXPECT FROM YOU.  
CG: THANK YOU SO GODDAMN MUCH, GAMZEE. YOU NEVER DISAPPOINT.  
TC: YoUlL tHaNk Me FoR tHe OcEaN wHeN yOu SeE iT.  
TC: I kNoW yOuR tEaRs WiLl TaStE bEaUtIfUl. :O)  
CG: UNTIL SOLLUX GETS HIS SOFTCUTTERS I AM NOT LETTING YOU LICK MY FACE.  
TC: YoUr FaCe WiLl TaStE bEtTeR tHaN tHe SoFtCuTtErS.  
TC: ThAt NaMe Is A mOtHeRfUcKiNg FaLsEhOoD. tHeY aReNt SoFt At AlL aNd ThEy TaStE lIkE mY bLoOd. MoThErFuCkInG dIsGuStInG.  
CG: IT MEANS THEY’RE FOR CUTTING SOFTER WIRE CASING. JEGUS.  
CG: PLEASE TELL ME YOU DIDN’T ACTUALLY TRY TO EAT THEM.  
TC: DoNt WoRrY, kArBrO.  
TC: AlL i DiD wAs TaStE tHeM.  
TC: ThE hOnEy WiNdOwS wErE bEtTeR. yOu CaN tElL tHe YeLlOw BlOoD iM kEePiNg ThOsE.  
CG: GAMZEE.  
CG: DO YOU TRY TO MAKE THINGS HARDER ON ME?  
TC: I wOuLd NeVeR dO aNyThInG lIkE tHaT tO yOu.  
CG: THEN TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE.  
TC: HeRe.

\-- terminallyCapricious [TC] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--

Almost as soon as the conversation ends, the lights go out. Karkat stands in the middle of the hallway, faintly lit by the screen of Dave’s laptop. He can hear something. It’s quiet, almost nothing. Drip...drip, drip....drip...

He walks forward slowly.

The lights buzz and come on for the twenty-third time.

* * *

Two boys bite into the flesh of a fruit that is poisonous to their kind. It burns, swelling their throats, peeling at their insides as they’re twisted up and thrown somewhere, choking, writhing, together.

A girl chews hers with the pain of reflection, and she too is carried away, as if on her friend’s forceful winds.

A lusus dives down through the lashing sea, swimming towards a boy who watches him, reaching out for any kind of company. When he is close a meteor pierces the water, stabbing into the lusus and scraping against the boy’s outstretched arm. As he is pushed away from him his teeth bite down on the applefruit before letting it go.

It spins silently, juices spreading out with red blood through the newly broken water.

* * *

You’re at the edge of the beach with Salamandad, racing around to collect shells that both of you find beautiful. When you go home together after days like this, he takes your treasures and hides them away. After a while you forget what they looked like, what they felt like, why you chose to pick them up over any of the others rolling with the easy waves of the shoreline. He’ll always remember, keeping them for the day when you would leave him and march with the Condesce. You’ll never know that he looked at them all the time and curled up around them to sleep. Out of love for you he showed them to a person who was going to be important in your life. You were young and he wasn’t. He had less time than you and wanted to give you other things.

You rush, laughing, into the water. He follows you and lets himself be spun around by the waves. You hug him, almost choking both of you. You’re too happy to care.

The sun feels warm on your skin. Comfortable. But soon it begins to burn. Why are you out in the daylight if you knew it would hurt you like this? You try to hide in the water but quickly there is too much of it. You breathe it in and choke on it, burning your throat with salt. Salamandad’s gone but you didn’t see him leave. 

You’re left alone and in miserable pain.

You push up, trying to break through to the surface. It takes a long time but you breathe in raggedly, gasping in more air than your water-logged lungs can take. 

You choke again, twisting to keep yourself up and above the water, which tastes like blood and pain and memory.

Your bleary eyes open and you’re surprised for a moment to see that you are not on Alternia.

You’re not drowning either, though there’s water all around you. More than the salt, applefruit juice tears at your throat. You grip it with your hands, hacking up what you can. There’s nothing to cough out. What you think is blocking your throat is, in fact, your throat. It’s swelled up in response to even the small amount of poison you ingested, making it hard to breathe.

The water around you splashes loudly as you try to get a footing. You see that it’s coloured; red, blue, brown, green, purple. The colours are stronger around the motionless bodies that are floating in it. As you watch one begins to shift, wriggling in the water. It stands up suddenly, almost falling once, and looks around. Liro. He’s alive.

Another goes under the water before coming up again. She gasps. Trip is alive.

She takes one look at you and wades over to Cal. She holds him in an odd embrace and her psionics go falteringly out over him.

Someone chuckles. You would recognise that sound anywhere. Gamzee comes into the water and sweeps through it towards you. Soon, still fighting to breathe, you’re pulled into the arms of the huge boy. He hugs you with just enough strength to make you feel safe again. His body is warm and you would draw nearer to it if it didn’t mean cutting off what little access to oxygen you already have.

“Welcome back. You’ve been motherfucking missed,” he rumbles at you.

There’s the violent sloshing of water. “Get-” Trip starts to gasp out a warning.

“Get your chill on, moirail of my moirail’s matesprit. We’ll be like a motherfucking family if you all up and let us.” He reaches out an arm to her and pats her on the head, but she shrugs away and scowls.

Cal tries to stand up but decides to float on the water instead.

“What’s going on?” Liro says loudly. “One of you. Tell me what just happened.”

“We got away,” Trip mumbles.

“What was that?”

“Look around, shithead.”

“How can you be so impertinent at a time like this?”

“You can see it yourself. Unless your eyes don’t work in air. I don’t know how you sea-dwellers do shit.”

“This isn’t the time for your misguided caste jealousy, Ternio. Tell me where we are.”

“Not Alternia. Moron.”

“Your insults are neither intelligent nor appreciated. Where’s Dulcis?”

No one says anything.

“Are none of you going to answer me? Where is she? If you are here, if Ternio is here, where is Dulcis? Did you leave her behind?” After a minute without response he becomes angrier. “DID YOU FUCKING LEAVE HER BEHIND? YOU MOTHERFUCKING WORTHLESS FRIENDS. She told me she was fine! She didn’t get on a ship because she was WAITING for you! How the FUCK could you do that to her! We have to go back for her. I order you. Bring her here.”

You try to speak but your throat is wrecked. What comes out is a wet squeaking sound.

“Caerul...” Trip says softly.

“What. WHAT. DID YOU KILL HER. DID YOU KILL HER AND LEAVE HER THERE. DON’T FUCKING TELL ME. Don’t FUCKING tell me.” Liro fights the water as he tries to get away from you all, backing out to the part of the floor that slopes up into dryness. “How could you do that? I trusted you to take care of her. My Dulcis. You killed her. YOU DID IT. DIDN’T YOU?”

“She’s dead!” Trip screams back at him. “We can’t go back for her now! We can’t bring her back to life! She’s gone! I’m so fucking sorry!”

Liro goes instantly quiet.

“Just stop shouting at us, fuck,” Trip says under her breath.

“What the fuck else am I supposed to do,” he replies. “Do I get to cry? Tears don’t mean anything underwater. They’re just like everything else. Weak and silent and endless. Why did you let her die? I thought you cared about her. I never could believe anything else, but in that, I thought you were honest.”

“I didn’t mean to.”

“So you did it.”

To your concern, Trip doesn’t correct him.

The conversation is cut off when there are footsteps outside the room. Gamzee shuffles away from you so that you can see the door. You glance at him and he grins, slow and lazy.

A boy comes in with a husktop under one arm. He stops, looking at the bloodstained water and at your friends, before his eyes meet yours. He drops the husktop. It crashes loudly and begins to slide towards the water. To your surprise, his eyes fill with tears. Even as he’s wiping them away with the sleeve of his black sweater, he doesn’t look away from you.

“I told you, Kar. You got to believe in all these miracles. They were here waiting for you.”

“Fuck you, Gamzee,” he says shakily. “Fuck.”

Gamzee goes out of the water and tries to lick Karkat’s face. He’s pushed away and licks his hand instead, smiling to himself. “Ugh, Gamzee, every time. We can’t even fucking play normal, can we. Here.” He takes out a purple bottle and hands it to him.

“What did I tell you? Miracles,” Gamzee purrs and sits down against a wall to drink from the bottle.

You have been standing still through all of this, not really knowing what to do with yourself.

Now that you remember everything you’re not so sure of your matespritship. What if Karkat only pitied you because you were a human? You’re not so weak now, though you have it on your moirail’s authority that you’re still a bit of an idiot. You still like and dislike the same things. You’re still the same person. But you’re different enough that even with Karkat crying at the sight of you, you’re not sure if this is what you thought it was. What you really, really want it to be.

Gamzee and Karkat’s relationship hasn’t changed and neither of them look all that different. You wonder how long you’ve been away. It could have been sweeps. Years. Sweeps. God, you’re not even sure what language to use anymore. In the dream you told Karkat you loved him and he could only say that he pitied you back. It’s not as important to you as it used to be, because now you know what he’s saying, but it’s still a little bit important, in the way that now you’ve got your memories back you’re not all that comfortable with the idea of eating grubloaf, even though like any other troll you were practically raised on the stuff and had absolutely no problems with it before–

There’s a warm hand in yours.

Your fingers grasp it, holding on to it tightly.

Karkat has come into the water to hold your hand, blushing from self-consciousness but smiling despite himself. You know that he’s worrying just as much as you. That’s enough to make you stop worrying, because gods be damned if you don’t pity him more than you ever actually thought was possible in a good way. You remember him saying on the board, that you’ll work things out between you because you care about each other.

So you follow him out of the water.

When you’re standing on the dry floor, physically close, because he’s warm and you’re not and there’s this overwhelming desire right now to hug and/or kiss him, Karkat slips something into your hand. He has that expression you recognise easily, of ‘I care what you think but I also care about you knowing that I care about what you think, so I’m pretending not to care about what you think’.

You lift your hand, slowly, and open your fingers.

There are a couple of individually wrapped Fruit Gushers.

Cool Fructose Monsoon. Your favourite.

You give him a questioning look. He blushes more deeply but doesn’t look away.

With an overjoyed laugh, you pull him in and kiss him for what is the first time for both of you. The first of many. Your feelings are mutual, your chronologies are running parallel again, and hopefully this is the end of the constant cultural misunderstandings that got in the way before.

* * *

ectoBiologist [EB] opened memo on board COOL BOARD FOR FRIENDS IN SPACE.

EB: has everyone been invited to the new board?  
carcinoGeneticist [CG] responded to memo.  
CG: JOHN.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to NOT WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT WAS.

turntechGodhead [TG] responded to memo.  
TG: good call  
triplicateCorruption [TC] responded to memo.  
TC: thank fuck!!!  
absentContrectator [AC] responded to memo.  
AC: thank you...for that reprieve...from my kismesis’ stupidity...  
EB: oh come on!  
grimAuxiliatrix [GA] responded to memo.  
GA: Unfortunately John I Have To Agree With Their Decision  
EB: it wasn't that bad!  
CG: EVERYONE ELSE IS SAYING THAT IT WAS AT LEAST THAT BAD, JOHN.

ectoBiologist [EB] changed name of board to VERY FUNNY, KARKAT.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to I THOUGHT SO.

grandAlacrity [GA] responded to memo.  
GA: I think that John’s Earlier suggestion was Original and Charmingly Straightforward.  
twinArmageddons [TA] responded to memo.  
TA: you ju2t want two dii2agree wiith dave.  
GA: I resent that implication, lowblood.  
TG: rose can i get your troll knowledge working on a question  
tentacleTherapist [TT] responded to memo.  
TT: You know I don’t like to participate in these memos unless absolutely necessary.  
TT: Yes, Dave, what is your question?  
TG: red blood is pretty low on the troll rainbow blood scale right  
EB: karkat, you're the one who named a board ‘fruity rumpus asshole factory’.  
TC: h3h3h3 thatS a good on3  
TC: h3 Should nam3 all our boardS  
TT: Red is at the bottom of the hemospectrum, as I’m sure you know.  
TG: and our blood colour is mutant or something  
TT: We share it with Karkat and it places us, if we were trolls, outside of the hemospectrum completely. We would therefore be pursued by the drones to be culled, were we trolls, which I’m sure you’re aware that we aren’t.  
AC: just let the angry one...name the board...  
AC: his suggestions...are more deliberately amusing...and do not make me...want to sever all of your fingers with my blade...

ectoBiologist [EB] changed name of board to KISMESISES SUCK, DON’T GET ONE.

EB: this is a friendly warning to everyone out there without a black quadrant filled.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to JOHN IS THE SHITTIEST TROLL.

CG: WE HAVE TO FILL ALL OUR QUADRANTS, DUMBASS.  
CG: DON’T GET ALL HIGHBLOODED AND MIGHTY JUST BECAUSE YOU’VE ALREADY DONE IT.

ectoBiologist [EB] changed name of board to MATESPRITS ALSO SUCK, DON’T GET ONE.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to FOR THE LOVE OF GOG, JOHN, SHUT UP.

TC: ar3 you two having a fight???  
EB: don't get mad at me for filling all my quadrants!  
EB: i don't even know how it happened, it just did.  
TG: so im just going to ignore all that  
TG: now rose  
TG: speaking hypothetically  
TT: Of course.  
CG: THAT’S RIDICULOUSLY UNFAIR.  
CG: HOW CAN SOMEONE LIKE YOU, WHO TALKS ABOUT SHAME GLOBES THE WAY KANAYA DOES ABOUT FABRIC, HAVE FILLED ALL THEIR QUADRANTS WHEN THEY’RE ONLY SEVEN SWEEPS?  
CG: ANSWER ME THAT, JOHN.  
TG: if a troll called a yellow blooded troll a lowblood  
TG: but had a kismesis with our blood colour  
TC: oh man you two ar3 having a fight  
TG: which youve just helpfully told me is off the charts in a bad way  
TG: what human word do we have for someone like that  
TC: thiS n3v3r happ3nS  
TC: im br3aking out a pil3 right now, john

ectoBiologist [EB] changed name of board to SOLVING ALL OF KARKAT’S PROBLEMS FOR HIM.

EB: maybe if you didn't shout so much, people would like you more.  
TT: I think I know which word you mean.  
GA: DAVE shut the fuck UP  
TG: hypocrite  
TG: isnt it rose

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to JOHN EGBERT IS AN OBLIVIOUS FUCKING IDIOT.

TA: ii2nt there a character liimiit on the2e board name2  
AC: are we...flipping quadrants now...  
AC: i don't think...i would be comfortable with that...  
TT: Yes, I believe that is the word for a troll in that entirely hypothetical situation.  
GA: i was just PUTTING THE LOWBLOOD in his PLACE  
GA: he is BELOW ME  
TG: i fucking hope not  
adiosToreador [AT] responded to memo.  
AT: i DON’T FEEL, uHH, vERY GOOD ABOUT THIS  
EB: why do you have to call me an idiot all the time??  
CG: I ONLY CALL YOU AN IDIOT WHEN YOU’RE BEING ONE, YOU COMPLETE MORON.  
EB: yeah, well!  
EB: you're so grumpy, kar. sometimes your shouting hurts my ears.

ectoBiologist [EB] changed name of board to JOHN EGBERT IS A SMART AND COOL GUY.

TA: that2 iit iim changiing the parameter2 of the board after thii2 memo ii2 over

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to SHUT UP JOHN.

ectoBiologist [EB] changed name of board to YOU SHUT UP.

EB: you're really rude as well!  
gardenGnostic [GG] responded to memo.  
GG: did i miss something??  
TT: Don’t worry yourself, Dave. After all, this situation is only hypothetical.  
TT: However the discontent in John and Karkat’s very real relationship is becoming increasingly evident.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to OH GREAT, YOU GOT LALONDE ON THIS.

ectoBiologist [EB]  changed name of board to SHE’S MY FRIEND, KARKAT.

TT: Do you realise that I can see what you’re doing?  
TG: not trying to get involved or anything  
TG: but im pretty sure theyre in kars room right now  
TG: if you can see what theyre doing youre more of a voyeur than i thought  
GG: should we stop them??  
GG: what if theyre fighting???? :(  
TC: i kn3w that waS a bad id3a  
CG: I DON’T SHOUT AT YOU OFTEN ENOUGH TO HURT.  
EB: you only shout at me when i deserve it, right?  
TA: ii dont give a 2hiit, but what wa2 a bad idea?  
CG: NO.  
EB: no.  
EB: please tell me what that means, karkat.  
TG: oh hold up

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to IT MEANS YOU’RE A FUCKING IDIOT.

EB: come on.  
EB: you have to talk to me about this.  
EB: whatever's going on here.  
TG: hang up the phone  
GA: What Nonsense are you speaking Now?  
TC: you can S33 for yourS3lf  
TC: it waS a bad id3a for th3m to mov3 in tog3th3r  
TG: i warned you guys  
TG: rose better put your crystal ball away for a hot minute  
CG: YOU KNOW WHY I DO IT.  
EB: what?  
TG: here we go  
CG: SHOUT AT YOU.  
CG: CALL YOU AN IDIOT.  
EB: i need you to tell me.  
TG: just gonna ignore the rest of us actively reading the memo ok  
CG:  
CG: BECAUSE I’M VULNERABLE WITH YOU.  
CG: BECAUSE YOU’RE IMPORTANT TO ME.  
CG: IT SCARES ME SOMETIMES.  
TC: w3ll Shit  
TG: straight out of one of his movies  
EB: when you're scared about us...about anything, i want you to come talk to me.  
EB: i don't want us to fight.  
EB: cal just said he doesn't want us to fight.  
TC: im juSt going to br3ak up thiS pil3 th3n  
AC: i really don’t want you to fight...  
AC: at the very least...john is less alert...  
AC: it takes the fun out of it...  
GA: This is more than I Ever wanted to know about your concupiscent relationships.  
TG: dont lie fk  
CG: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.  
EB: are you serious?  
CG: I AM SO FUCKING SERIOUS IT IS ACTUALLY HURTING ME.

ectoBiologist [EB] changed name of board to I WANT YOU.

ectoBiologist [EB] changed name of board to I THOUGHT IT WAS OBVIOUS.

TG: ok im pretty sure you guys are in the same room right now  
TG: respiteblock whatever  
TG: trip says youre shacking up now so congratulations  
TG: can you both just turn around and have a real life talk away from this memo  
TG: youre putting us all at risk of cavities and rose is everything but a trained dentist  
TT: You underestimate me.  
TG: yeah yeah youre probably behind this whole thing  
TG: pulling some seer shenanigans suggesting to john that he start up a board  
TG: finding them a nice big room and verbally pushing them into it  
CG: YOU DON’T WANT ME.  
CG: I’M RUDE AND SHOUT AT PEOPLE. I CAN’T FILL MY QUADRANTS EXCEPT WITH MYSELF.  
TC: which iS w3ird aS fuck by the way  
TC: So iS john though So i think you guyS ar3 pr3tty Suit3d  
EB: i want you because i know you.  
EB: i know why you do those things.  
EB: if you haven't filled your other quadrants then i'm happy, because it means you spend more time with me.  
CG: JOHN, YOU ARE A TERRIBLE TROLL.  
TG: agreed  
AC: i also think so...  
GA: Regrettably Undeniable.  
TC: iv3 b33n t3lling him that for Sw33pS  
EB: you love me though, right? :)

carcinoGeneticist [CG] changed name of board to <3.

TG: yep there we go  
TG: whos in charge of the pailing alarm  
TC: thatS m3 Sir  
TG: better ring it quick  
TC: y3S Sir  
TC: pailing alarm  
TC: 3v3ryon3 avoid th3 r3Spit3block of john and karkat unl3SS th3y wiSh to b3 thoroughly 3mbarraSS3d and/or n3ar fatally wound3d by Said trollS moirail  
TC: thiS iS a public announc3m3nt und3r th3 Supr3m3 juriSdiction of l3giSlac3rator r3dglar3, Support3d and 3nforc3d by th3 good mayor of cantown II and hiS p3opl3  
TC: and alSo dav3 and myS3lf  
TG: amen  
GA: What a crock of shit.  
TC: do i n33d to ring th3 pailing alarm again Sir  
TG: hmm i dont think that will be necessary  
TG: not for at least a week i should say  
GA: What?  
GG: hehe!!  
EB: you guys are so over the top.  
EB: we're not ev

carcinoGeneticist [CG] closed memo on board <3.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I started writing this story, I had planned to have four parts. In each, a different beta kid would be sent to Alterniate and events would play out differently. What I didn't count on was part one breaking 80,000 words and taking months to write!
> 
> This chapter marks the end of Part One, Universe A. I've also included a bonus story and the first chapter of Part Two, Universe B (feat. wiggler Dave), which I didn't have the stamina to finish writing. Read them if you're interested.
> 
> Thank you to all the readers who stuck with me through this strange and convoluted story. I'm grateful to everyone who commented and left kudos - it made the long hours editing worth it!


	13. Bonus Story - Tripel's Past

You are SIX SWEEPS OLD when you first meet him, LONELY enough to listen when he talks to you and FOOLISH enough to believe what he says.

He’s standing at the edge of the forest and staring into the darkness of the trees. Monsters call out to each other, screaming occasionally, shouting out a warning to anyone who might be stupid enough to walk onto their territory. At first you think he’s stupid enough, so you go over to stop him like the KIND-HEARTED young troll that you are.

“It’s dangerous in there,” you tell him.

His head turns to you, but not his body. Then he smiles. “Do you have a right to be telling me that?”

“What?”

“A right,” he repeats, gesturing at your arm. “What is your blood status?”

You shrink away from him, not sure why he’s asking you such a strange question.

For some reason his smile widens at your reaction. Calmly, deliberately, he takes out a knife and runs the edge of it along his forearm. Blue bursts out from it in beautiful colour. “This is my blood status. Cerulean. Yes, I am a highblood. Yes, that does mean you have to do everything I say. What I make you do, well,” his gaze travels to your arm, “that depends on _you_.”

Covering your bare skin with your hand, you say without thinking, “I’m brown blooded.”

“A lowblood?”

“Yes.” You are damn well impressed with yourself for not stuttering when you answer.

“Good,” he says easily and puts the knife away. “I have use of you, then.”

He takes a few steps and you’re grateful for the distance between you, lowering your arm in relief. If he notices your rude behaviour, he doesn’t say anything about it. In fact you almost think he’s going to walk completely away, when his eyes come back to you.

“I am a cerulean blood and I’m afraid my status is higher than yours. I’m only going to ask one thing from you, now.”

“What?” You are damn well annoyed at yourself for stuttering when you ask.

“Your trolltag.”

You blink at him.

He sighs impatiently. “Give it to me when you are able.”

“Uh...triplicateCorruption,” you tell him, and add, “TC,” just in case that wasn’t clear.

“Good. I’ll be in contact with you in the coming days.”

Without anything more, he walks away from you and the forest and towards the Alternian beach.

* * *

\-- geostrophicGeneralist [GG] began trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] –-

GG: tHis is the ceruLean BLooD You encountereD severaL DaYs aGo  
GG: mY name is unimPortant, anD i trust You wiLL not Be neeDinG it  
GG: i wiLL now ProceeD to exPlain to You mY PurPose For this communication  
TC: why ar3 you m3SSaging m3???  
GG: now now, You HarDLY want to asK Questions You Do not want tHe answers to  
TC: what iS th3 anSw3r???  
GG: tHe answer is simPLY tHat i Do not Have to Give You one  
GG: i owe You notHinG anD You are not entitLeD to anYthinG From me  
GG: PLease Do not maKe tHe mistaKe oF tHinKinG otHerwise  
TC: if you dont t3ll m3 how will i know what your3 trolling m3 for  
GG: i wouLD teLL You in a matter oF moments iF You wouLD not interruPt  
GG: GooD, tHen i wiLL beGin  
GG: mY moiraiL is a HiGHBLooD, near HiGHest oF tHe HiGH iF You can DeiGn to imaGine tHat  
TC: thatS gr3at for you  
TC: i h3ard thoS3 on3S ar3 rar3  
GG: PerHaPs it is in Your Favour that You are FooLishLY DisDainFuL oF Your Betters  
GG: tHen He cannot Question Your intentions  
TC: what ar3 my int3ntionS th3n  
GG: to BeFrienD  
GG: mY moiraiL is LoneLY  
GG: i am oFten occuPieD witH HiGHBLooD Business anD am unaBLe to sPenD time witH Him  
GG: i wisH to FinD Him a comPanion, someone otHer tHan mYseLF tHat He can taLK to  
GG: unFortunateLY HiGHBLooDs or even miDBLooDs are out oF tHe Question  
GG: tHere is too mucH PoLitics invoLveD  
GG: so i turn to You  
GG: You were weLL-meaninG anD a suitaBLe canDiDate  
TC: right  
GG: Do You accePt  
TC: iS it okay if i r3fuS3 lat3r???  
GG: oF course  
GG: He wiLL messaGe You at tHis troLLtaG tomorrow

\-- geostrophicGeneralist [GG] ceased trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] \--

* * *

\-- timorousAbnegation [TA] began trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] –-

TA: h.e.l.l.o.  
TC: h3llo  
TC: do you know that it iS daytim3???  
TA: i.s. i.t.  
TC: y3S  
TC: v3ry bright, Sun Shining, could pot3ntially blind any trollS Stupid 3nough to both b3 awak3 and look up, Sound familiar at all???  
TA: i.s. t.h.a.t. r.e.a.l.l.y. w.h.a.t. i.t.s. l.i.k.e.  
TC: hav3 you n3v3r S33n it b3for3  
TA: i. h.a.v.e.n.t. r.e.a.l.l.y. s.e.e.n. a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g.  
TC: oh  
TC: im Sorry  
TC: do you liv3 und3r th3 S3a, th3n???  
TA: y.e.s.  
TA: i. t.h.i.n.k. s.o.  
TA: t.h.a.t. w.a.s. a. j.o.k.e.  
TC: it waS funny  
TC: whatS it lik3 th3r3???  
TA: v.e.r.y. d.a.r.k.  
TA: i. d.o.n.t. n.e.e.d. t.h.i.n.g.s. t.h.a.t. o.t.h.e.r. t.r.o.l.l.s. d.o.  
TA: l.i.k.e. s.o.p.o.r. o.r. t.o. s.t.a.y. i.n.s.i.d.e. i.n. t.h.e. d.a.y.t.i.m.e.  
TC: thatS pr3tty cool  
TA: d.o. y.o.u. t.h.i.n.k. s.o.  
TA: i. t.h.i.n.k. i.t.s. v.e.r.y. t.e.d.i.o.u.s.  
TC: itS lik3 that 3v3rywh3r3 though  
TA: r.e.a.l.l.y.  
TC: itS lik3 lon3lin3SS  
TC: you can b3 lon3ly anywh3r3 if th3r3S no on3 for you to talk to  
TC: you can alSo b3 bor3d anywh3r3 if th3r3S nothing fun for you to do  
TA: y.o.u.r.e. v.e.r.y. c.l.e.v.e.r.  
TA: a.n.d. n.i.c.e. i. t.h.i.n.k.  
TC: thank you  
TC: itS nic3 of you to Say So  
TA: s.e.e.  
TA: y.o.u. a.r.e. v.e.r.y. c.l.e.v.e.r.  
TC: :)  
TA: :.).

* * *

TC: whatS your3 name  
TA: a.r.a.n.h.a.  
TA: w.h.a.t.s. y.o.u.r.s.  
TC: trip3l  
TA: i.t. s.u.i.t.s. y.o.u.  
TC: r3ally???  
TC: i think id lik3 a nicknam3  
TA: w.e.l.l. i. l.i.k.e. y.o.u. t.h.e. w.a.y. y.o.u. a.r.e.  
TA: b.u.t. i.f. y.o.u. g.e.t. a. n.i.c.k.n.a.m.e. t.h.a.t.s. a.l.s.o. g.o.o.d.

* * *

TA: h.o.w. o.l.d. a.r.e. y.o.u.  
TC: Six Sw33pS, but i think i look young3r  
TA: o.h.  
TA: i. a.m. s.e.v.e.n. s.w.e.e.p.s.  
TA: i.s. t.h.a.t. o.k.a.y. w.i.t.h. y.o.u.  
TC: why wouldnt it b3???  
TC: it do3Snt r3ally matt3r  
TA: i.f. y.o.u. s.a.y. s.o.  
TA: i.m. h.a.p.p.y. a.b.o.u.t. t.h.a.t.

* * *

TC: how did you g3t a moirail lik3 that???  
TA: h.e.s. v.e.r.y. p.e.r.s.u.a.s.i.v.e.  
TA: i.m. n.o.t. s.u.r.e. i. l.i.k.e.d. h.i.m. t.h.a.t. m.u.c.h. a.t. f.i.r.s.t.  
TA: h.e. t.a.l.k.e.d. t.o. m.e. a. l.o.t. a.n.d. t.h.i.s. i.s. s.o.r.t. o.f. w.h.a.t. h.a.p.p.e.n.e.d.  
TC: i thought you liv3 und3r th3 S3a  
TA: y.e.s.  
TA: h.e. w.a.s. s.w.i.m.m.i.n.g. w.h.e.n. w.e. m.e.t.  
TA: a.l.l. h.i.g.h.b.l.o.o.d.s. h.a.v.e. s.t.r.o.n.g. l.u.n.g. c.a.p.a.c.i.t.y.  
TA: b.u.t. o.n.l.y. s.e.a.d.w.e.l.l.e.r.s. h.a.v.e. g.i.l.l.s.  
TC: thatS handy  
TC: i can only hold my br3ath for thirty S3condS  
TA: t.h.a.t. i.s. b.e.c.a.u.s.e. o.f. y.o.u.r. b.l.o.o.d. c.a.s.t.e.  
TA: i.t. m.e.a.n.s. y.o.u. c.a.n.t. c.o.m.e. a.n.d. v.i.s.i.t. m.e.  
TC: you can br3ath3 air  
TC: you could com3 onto land and viSit m3  
TA: i. c.a.n.t. d.o. t.h.a.t.  
TC: why???  
TA: i. d.o.n.t. t.h.i.n.k. i. c.a.n. e.x.p.l.a.i.n.  
TC: oh  
TC: ok  
TC: if you can viSit m3 on3 day, pl3aS3 l3t m3 know!!!  
TA: y.e.s.  
TA: :.).

* * *

TC: why do you alwayS do smil3y fac3S lik3 that???  
TC: itS cut3 but i dont know why  
TA: d.o. i. d.o. t.h.e.m. w.r.o.n.g.  
TC: cant you S33 it???  
TC: you put dotS in b3tw33n th3 SymbolS  
TC: it Should b3 lik3 thiS  
TC: :)  
TA: :.).  
TA: w.a.s. t.h.a.t. b.e.t.t.e.r.  
TC: no it waS th3 Sam3  
TA: :.). :.). :.). :.) :.).  
TC: on3 of thoS3 waS cloS3  
TA: w.h.i.c.h. o.n.e.  
TC: th3 S3cond laSt on3  
TA: :.)  
TC: thatS good  
TC: how about you try thiS on3  
TC: :o)  
TA: g.i.v.e. m.e. a. m.i.n.u.t.e. p.l.e.a.s.e.  
TA: :.o.). :.o.) :.o.) :.o.) :.o)  
TC: th3 laSt on3 waS almoSt right  
TA: o.h. g.o.o.d.  
TA: :.o)  
TC: h3h3h3  
TC: it looks lik3 you hav3 thr33 3y3S  
TA: b.u.t. i. d.o.n.t.  
TC: hahaha  
TC: your3 So cut3!!!

* * *

\-- geostrophicGeneralist [GG] began trolling triplicateCorruption [TC] -–

GG: How are You enJoYinG sPeaKinG to mY moirail  
GG: From wHat i Hear You two are GettinG on Quite weLL  
TC: aranha iS v3ry nic3  
TC: thank you for introducing m3 to him  
GG: now now, GettinG aHeaD oF ourseLF arent we  
GG: tHere are certain tHinGs aranHa neeDs You to Do  
TC: ...  
TC: ill hav3 to ch3ck all of thiS with him  
GG: oF course  
GG: i aPPreciate Your vigilance  
GG: BeFore i teLL You Your tasKs, i must Know iF You Have anY sPeciaL aBiLities as is common in LowBLooDs  
TC: Sorry to diSappoint you  
GG: its HarDLY a DisaPPointment, more oF a reLieF  
GG: i BeLieve You are FamiLiar witH tHe Forests  
TC: v3ry  
GG: tHere are items tHat i neeD You to Procure

* * *

You don’t know what happens to the bits and pieces that you scavenge from the forest, or even what your new friend or his moirail need them for. All you know is that when you go out to the beach, there’s always the raft waiting there like he said it would be, and that when you leave the handful of clusterberries or bandyleaves he asked you to collect, the raft shuffles out over the water as if being pulled by something you can’t see.

Sometimes GG asks you to go out to the raft during the day. You always refuse.

Whatever he’s up to, you’re happy that Aranha seems oblivious. You really do like talking to him and don’t want to think that he’s getting caught up in that strange guy’s games.

* * *

TC: whatS it lik3 to hav3 a moirail th3n  
TA: h.a.r.d. w.o.r.k.  
TA: i. h.a.v.e. t.o. t.a.l.k. a. l.o.t. m.o.r.e. t.h.a.n. i.m. u.s.e.d. t.o.  
TC: you talk a lot with m3  
TA: t.h.i.s. i.s. t.y.p.i.n.g.  
TA: i. d.o.n.t. t.h.i.n.k. i.t.s. t.h.e. s.a.m.e.  
TC: do you 3v3r think that h3S a bit Strang3???  
TA: w.e.l.l. y.e.s.  
TA: i. d.o.n.t. k.n.o.w. h.o.w. m.a.n.y. p.e.o.p.l.e. w.o.u.l.d. s.w.i.m. d.e.e.p. e.n.o.u.g.h. t.o. f.i.n.d. m.e.  
TA: e.v.e.n. i.f. t.h.e.y. a.r.e. h.i.g.h.b.l.o.o.d.s.  
TC: do3S it upS3t you if i talk about him lik3 thiS???  
TA: n.o.t. r.e.a.l.l.y.  
TA: i. d.o.n.t. m.i.n.d. w.h.a.t.e.v.e.r. h.e. d.o.e.s.  
TA: w.e. m.i.g.h.t. a.s. w.e.l.l. n.o.t. b.e. m.o.i.r.a.i.l.s. f.o.r. a.l.l. i. .r.e.a.l.l.y. c.a.r.e. a.b.o.u.t. h.i.m.  
TA: i. l.i.k.e. y.o.u. a. l.o.t. t.h.o.u.g.h.  
TC: aS moirailS  
TA: u.m.  
TA: i. d.o.n.t. k.n.o.w.  
TA: :.o)  
TC: :)

* * *

One day you wait near the raft, watching for anything that might give you a clue as to how it works or why it’s there. You notice that the raft is being pulled by a rope that you can’t see, because it breaks the surface of the water a little way out. From the look of it you think there’s a lot of give. The closest bit of land it could be tied to is too far out for no one else to have swum into the wire, so you figure it goes down. Into the water, through the ocean.

That doesn’t make sense, though. The little things that you’ve been leaving would fall off the raft if it was pulled underneath the surface. 

Unfortunately, you fail to ask yourself why GG would bother with a raft, if all he wanted was to send berries and bark sailing across the water. You get onto the raft, curling up so that your face is on your knees. It immediately lifts away from the shore.

* * *

You remember being pulled under, almost choking, skin burning at the unfamiliar feeling of saltwater on your land-dweller skin. When you wake up though, you’re in a dark block. Your body feels strange, like there’s a faint pressure on it, which stays with you as you sit up and move to stand. You’re lighter here than you’re used to. It’s hard to put your feet where you want them on the ground. Blinking, eyes stinging, you look around.

Something trails through the air near your head. Brown. Your blood. You panic at the impossibility of it and twist around, trying to find where you’ve been hurt. There isn’t as much as a scratch on you, and even though you remember your skin burning it’s clear and gray as it ever was.

You shrug, concern for yourself falling away. Then you step out of the block, moving to the rest of the hive.

It’s dark. Condesce, it is so dark. There are too many places where things could jump out at you, too many walls to bump into and the frightening possibility of stairs you don’t know about.

Somehow – you don’t know how – you feel a difference in the air. Like smelling something, except all your senses can manage at the moment is to feel this all-over pressure and see about two feet around you. You follow whatever it is until you find a respiteblock with light shining out of it, wavering in the air as if it’s not sure what light is meant to do, here in a place where there hasn’t been any for a long time.

In the clear rays of light you can see something darker, wafting through the air. Purple. Like your blood, except purple. You’re stunned and there’s a sick feeling in your stomach as you walk closer to the block and see the air so thick with tendrils of purple that you have to step _through_ it–

“She’s finally here,” comes the voice of GG, but you’re so blinded by purple and complete repulsion that you don’t see immediately where he is. His voice sounds odd to your ears, like it’s muffled.

You choke on your words. “What’s going on?”

“Did you hear that? She could have said something more worthwhile. These are the first words you’ve heard spoken, other than my own.” You can hear the smile in his voice. “Really, do try a little harder for him.”

“Him?” you ask stupidly, waving at the air in front of you, stomach twisting like you’re going to throw up. You’ve never seen this much blood before. 

“Him,” GG confirms.

Your hand stops mid-wave and your eyes widen. They take in the block properly for the first time. A boy is bound to the ground by a chain clipped to his wrists. He’s sitting down behind the light, moving his head slowly, confusedly. On the other side of the room stands GG, smiling at you like a bastard.

“What did you do...” You’re young and naive and you don’t know how to respond to what you’re seeing. Your voice chokes on the few words that you manage. 

You think you can taste blood in your mouth. Fuck, this is awful.

“I’m taking care of him,” GG says smoothly.

“WHAT?!” you screech.

“Now, now,” he says in a warning tone.

“Aranha?!”

The boy’s head turns to you.

You sound pathetic as you say, “What...”

GG strides over to the light, not seeming to give a shit about the blood that’s he’s walking into. Thanks to the angle his teeth light up terrifyingly, his callous smile amplified until you want to run away and save yourself. He sees that in you, enjoys it, then twists the light toward Aranha.

Aranha doesn’t react, but it’s not because he’s drugged or wounded or, Condesce forbid, used to this kind of treatment. You see for the first time that his face isn’t bound at all. His mouth can move freely, his eyes are wide open.

“You’re blind,” you say, with a misplaced feeling of relief. It explains little things that you never understood. Things that you came to pity so much about Aranha.

His lips move as if he’s going to reply, but he ducks his head.

“Oh, he’s embarrassed! She’s pretty, you know. Young. Exactly what you need.” GG is still smiling widely, teeth flashing.

It occurs to you that GG doesn’t look so pale under the light. Aranha’s skin is almost white, like a wild beast, but his blood is clearly noble. It makes you feel more comfortable with him. Your lusus and the monsters of the forest are the only real company you’ve had. You think it must be because of the darkness here, though it could be a mutation.

“I don’t mind,” you tell him.

His cheeks purple faintly and he lifts his face to you, as if that’s the only way he can be sure you’ll hear him. “Thank you," he says in a soft voice, rough at the edges from rare use of it and nearly quiet enough to be a whisper.

“You really are the perfect candidate. Almost too perfect.” GG shakes his head and considers Aranha, who doesn’t outwardly react. “I wonder that he might care about you _too_ much.”

“Why...why is he chained?”

GG looks at you like you should already know. “He has always been chained. You’ve talked to him. You know what his life is like.”

Lonely. Dark. Quiet. This wasn’t what you fucking imagined when you heard those fucking few words.

“Aranha?” you ask shakily.

“I’ve always been here,” he says, almost in apology.

“Yes. He types using a device I gave him. A ‘mobile line’. I didn’t come up with it, but I can tell you that they’re going to be the next big thing in hardware-”

“Shut up,” you hiss.

GG does for a moment and then goes on. “It reads out the sounds to him, so he knows what you’ve written. He types with all those damnably stupid dots because it keeps him from losing where he is in the word, knowing that he has enough letters at the end of it. If he wasn’t tethered like a disobedient lusus, I’d say he’d be out there, hacking with the best of them. There’s brilliance in that mind-”

Condesce smite him, he sounds fond as he talks about Aranha as if he wasn’t sitting right there, his hands bound and body likely weakened by whatever bullshit this place has put him through.

“Where’s your lusus?”

Aranha gestures at GG with only the faintest clinking of his chain. He’s comfortable with it and it’s clear to you he’s been bound like this for a long time.

_I don’t need sopor or to stay inside in the daytime._

He needs a damned lot more than he’s getting, that’s for sure.

“I killed it,” GG says in answer to your question.

You freeze up and take a step back before you even realise you’re doing it.

“Yes. I killed it. It was bothersome. Kept howling at me like I was doing something wrong.”

“What was it?” Your words come out like a gasp.

“A lantern-waver,” Aranha says softly, like he’s remembering.

It’s ironic as fuck and as young as you are, innocent as you still are, you’re beginning to want to beat GG into the ground with all the strength you don’t have. How he could kill anyone’s lusus, let alone Aranha’s, let alone a _lantern-waver_...a fish as big as a troll, silver-scaled and pale beautiful, with a light coming out from its forehead and underneath its skin if that one failed – a lusus which lives at the very bottom of the ocean because that is where its beauty is most needed, in the darkest place where there is no other light – a lusus which by every account is peaceful and too fucking rare to kill just because it was howling at a bad guy...

“When?”

You don’t expect them to answer you, but they do.

“A sweep ago.” Aranha’s voice is dejected, resigned.

GG chuckles. “Two seasons ago. I told him that because I wanted to know if he would believe it. A season in shackles feels the same as a sweep, I suppose.”

“Why?”

Your heart beats once, twice, three times, with him staring at you intensely before he answers. “I want to keep him. Yes, Aranha. His lusus was nothing compared to him, gliding through the water, following it around like he was the pet. You’ve seen his skin, I’m sure. So pale. So soft. I couldn’t believe it when I found him. Could you believe it, Aranha?”

GG’s fingers lightly grip the boy’s chin and only release it when Aranha gives a short, sharp shake of his head.

“Now that he’s broken in there are only a few things left to do before he becomes like me. You’re necessary, of course. A lowblood. Living in the forest. So perfect. No one will miss you. People might even wonder why you hadn’t been culled already.” His lips curl up in the sneer of a hemoist. “To make things even better, even easier for me, you _like_ Aranha. Seeing him like this, I bet you pity him like no one has before. I blinded him, you know. I killed his lusus and blinded him and tied him up here next to a light that he can’t even see. You. You came here on your own, because you fancy yourself close to him. Perfect. I would thank you except you don’t deserve it, of course, acting on your own base, thoughtless, lowblood desires-”

“And what colour is your blood?” you say rashly, trying to dig into him about being cerulean when Aranha is a violet blood.

It backfires when GG steps in close to you, keeping his eyes on yours as he drags a knife over his arm. Blood spills out and trails in the air, mixing in disgustingly with Aranha’s. “Rainbow,” he says and his voice would have made you shiver if the sight of multi-coloured blood wasn’t enough. You know what it means. You understand how much trouble you and Aranha are in. GG will eat both of you if he wants to, or torture you until you wish your blood was adding to his in that fucking abomination of colour. 

He sees the fear in your eyes and laughs.

As he turns away you lunge for the knife, grabbing it by the blade, feeling it slice into your fingers. You spin it and hold it up against him. He laughs again, looking at you out of the side of his eye.

“Brown blood tastes the sweetest,” he murmurs. “Have you heard that? It’s true. I’ve known brown bloods to drink themselves dry once they figured it out, lowbloods are too lazy to go out and get what they need-”

You push the blade against his skin, ignoring the blood rising out from your hand.

“How am I breathing?” you ask him. It wasn’t what you wanted to say, but it’s something and your voice didn’t even shake once.

“My magic.”

“Magic doesn’t exist,” you say and jab the knife close enough to draw sick-looking rainbow blood.

“Psionics, then,” he rolls his eyes, “use whichever word you’d like. Darling. Dearest. I am keeping you alive. If you kill me, you’re dead, and _no one knows that Aranha is here_.”

“Fuck,” you say for the first time in your life. It’s an offhanded statement, nothing scared or resigned. You know what you want and that happens to coincide with what you need. You don’t realise it now, but this is the beginning of the loss of your kind-hearted, childish innocence. Although arguably that was when you pulled the knife on him with every intention of maiming or brutally slaughtering the rainbow-drinker bastard.

“It’s always questions with you. I hardly think it matters when you’re about to be sacrificed, but it’s no skin off my very-difficult-to-scar back. So before you ask me what you’re here for, obviously, it’s so Aranha has something to feed on when I turn him. The first body’s always the hardest, but they taste better live and the brown ones are the best. So, so perfect. I lucked out with you.”

Aranha makes a soft whimpering sound. You’re not sure if it’s because he didn’t know GG wanted to turn him, or he doesn’t want to eat you. Honestly you’re hoping that it’s both.

In a sudden, jerking movement, GG has your arm bent and twisted savagely, bones popping out from the force of his unnatural strength. You don’t cry out, not realising until he stares at you that crying out is a pretty normal thing to do when a rainbow-drinker is breaking your bones and has every intention of killing you. 

“Oh,” you say.

“What,” he says.

“‘What’ what?”

“‘Oh’ what?”

“‘Oh’ fuck you?” you try and he bends your arm further. Aranha is near-hyperventilating at the sound of bones sliding out from your flesh.

It hurts like nothing has ever hurt before, like a white light came right up to you and stabbed you between the eyes before getting started on burning your arm from the inside out, and enough blood is coming out that GG’s eyes are visibly dilated, but you’re not screaming in agony and that’s confusing both of you.

“Why aren’t you-” he cries out.

“I am,” you assure him, not wanting him to prove a point by breaking other parts of your body.

“Then why...how...”

“Good question.”

With a frustrated shout, he lets go of your arm and you watch with shared surprise as the bones jam back in and the flesh comes back over them and your skin seals and your arm is as good as new. Aranha isn’t seeing or hearing any of that, and you’re vaguely aware of him fighting the chain in a freak out that could rival your lusus whenever he catches a glance at the sun.

You’re pretty happy to leave it at that, but GG takes out his knife and cuts lines along your arm. You try to yank it away because it still hurts like a bitch but he holds onto your hand tightly enough to bruise.

“Aranha, I’m still here, it’s okay,” you say to him past GG’s shoulder.

He calms down immediately, the chain slowly settling on the ground.

“What is this?” GG mutters to himself.

“Useful.”

“That’s not what I-” he says sharply and turns his eyes on you. “I wonder if I can still kill you. A challenge might be interesting. Something new after all these sweeps. But, I wonder how useful you could be to me if I turned you, instead...”

You yelp and claw wildly at him while taking quick steps backward. He stabs the knife deep into your shoulder, and while you’re not sure if the arm thing was a one-off or if it’s limited in some way you don’t know about yet – maybe you’ll keel over dead the day after getting yourself and Aranha out of here – since the alternative is death or undeath right fucking now you’re more than happy, more than willing, to pull the knife roughly out of your shoulder and dig it into his face.

You fight. He has more experience behind his hits but after a couple of seconds he’s back to nothing, while your haphazard slashes are filling the air – water – with more blood than even a rainbow-drinker would like to lose. Just as you think you’re winning he rushes at you, tearing powerfully into your chest and neck. To keep yourself alive you push out, over the block, with an ability you never knew you had.

An ability you won’t use for sweeps to come, and then not even deliberately, because of what happens next.

Your injuries heal quickly. So do GG’s, but the shock of it sends him reeling. Neither of you realise in that precious, quiet moment, that Aranha’s eyes are also healed. That he is a violet blood, _almost the highest of the high_ , sitting in a block, _chained up_ , with blood in the water around him.

_His own blood._

His eyes focus and the last you see of the Aranha you knew and pitied and wanted to save is him looking up at the swirling purple, lips parting, face serene and bright in the lamplight.

Then the blood rage hits. His brow furrows and he growls and roars so fiercely he tears his own mouth open wider on his sharp teeth. His pupils dilate, his eyes narrow, he sees GG first and he stands up in a rush of movement, tearing the chain from the ground, tearing the flesh from his own wrists to free his hand, running forward to crush GG’s head in or something equally horrific, equally unfathomable to the you that is six sweeps old and came here to help a friend.

In less than a minute there’s more rainbow than purple in the water and GG isn’t moving. Aranha comes to you next, stalking, rumbling out a threat he’s too far gone to put into words.

“Aranha,” you say and he gnashes his teeth at you, “I pity you. You’re the first person – the only person – I’ve ever said that to. And...I’m sorry. I-”

But you can’t get the rest of what you were going to say out, because he crushes into you, causing you more pain than you have ever felt in your life and will ever fucking let yourself feel again, whether you pity the person or not. Your stupid, foolish, young body keeps healing itself, until you’re too exhausted to do it properly anymore and the blood spills out and out and you slide to the ground and keep on looking at Aranha. At the deep wounds on his wrists, which he doesn’t even seem to be aware of, which you could heal if he just stopped this and let you, at the luminousness of his skin with his body turned away from the light, at his hair, lit up around the edges like the shine of the Condesce’s crown. 

It’s the highbloods that can hurt you the most, even when they care about you. 

You tell yourself that blood rage killed Aranha, but you believe that it was you.

When you nearly die four times, drowning on your way back up to the surface. When the sweeps pass and you don’t visibly age. When you keep the chat logs and look at them sometimes, mimicking the dots with taps of your finger on a screen. When you relax enough to make friends with a highblood again, though you think that John doesn’t really count. When a violet blood almost kills him. When your lusus and planet die and you’re still, still alive.

You remember Aranha and how much you wanted him to live, and think that he might have wanted the same thing for you.

* * *

TA: g.i.v.e. m.e. a. m.i.n.u.t.e. p.l.e.a.s.e.  
TA: :.o.). :.o.) :.o.) :.o.) :.o)  
TC: th3 laSt on3 waS almoSt right  
TA: o.h. g.o.o.d.  
TA: :.o)


	14. Universe B (unfinished)

The machine towers over them, dead screens and unmarked levers waiting silently for power or manipulation. It seems to come out from the wall, taking up most of the space in the room. In the poor light it’s like it’s reaching out, surrounding them, getting bigger as they look at it.

Sollux doesn’t trust anything that he, with all of his leet hacker expertise, can’t begin to understand. All of the buttons are the same size and colour, unlabelled and lining the machine haphazardly. It doesn’t make sense. He wants to leave the block and lock the door behind them, but he waits for the others to suggest it. Convincing Karkat of anything usually backfires on him. “It’th not Alternian, that’th all I can thay for thertain.”

“It’s not human, either,” Rose says quietly.

Jade leans in close, seemingly unafraid. “That part of it is a lot like Grandpa’s transmaterializer. I’m not sure about that part, there, but if I had to guess I would say it has something to do with that bit over there, because they’re lined up with each other.”

“How do you mean?”

“Oh for gog’s sake, John, don’t encourage her!” Karkat complains.

“A lot of machines are made like houses. If you have a square, that’s a room. Wires connect the rooms so that they can work together to make up the whole house. If a square isn’t doing anything, it’s like having a room that no one uses. It doesn’t make much sense and probably shouldn’t be there. 

“When I look at a machine like this, I look for the rooms and for the house as well. That’s how I can understand what it’s for and how to fix it when it breaks. With this one, that part there, that’s a square. And...oh, it might be getting a bit complicated here...it’s like a wall, and that part over there is the other wall. Little rooms inside big rooms, I guess.”

“Inside a house,” John says slowly.

She beams at him. “Yes.”

“Those panels there, they’re just like windows.”

“Yes!” Jade claps her hands together. “And they look so, soo familiar! I just can’t remember where I’ve seen them before...somewhere back home, I think!”

Rose takes a small step back, unnoticed by anyone but Kanaya.

“But you can’t see through them.”

“Oh, you’re not meant to! Windows aren’t always for seeing-”

Rose takes another step back, then another, staring at the machine like it was something that she knew but had thought she’d lost. Her back presses gently to the wall and she puts her palms on it, spreading her fingers, staring, as Jade chatters on.

“-sometimes they’re for, oh, I don’t know. Taking you places that you’ve never been-”

A red light flickers on at the top of the machine.

“-places that you want to, or would never think to go!”

A metal arm, extending out over them, begins to slowly move.

“What is wrong, Rose?” Kanaya reaches out a hand to her.

Tavros wheels backwards and then stops, bracing himself and blushing, embarrassed for his own cowardice but determined to stand with the others, even if the metal arm is moving oddly and there was a chance that it would try to kill them in a moment. He’s rewarded for his bravery when Dave gives him a nod, his sword drawn and eyes on the machine.

“-but I’m just being silly. My grandson told me about it and he’s very nice, but a little dramatic!”

They don’t hear Kanaya’s murmur of “Rose?” 

“He sounds like a lot of fun,” John says with a wide smile.

“Shit, KK. I don’t know what it’th doing.”

Before their leader has a chance to respond to this new and possibly deadly situation, Gamzee stands in front of him, grinning lazily the way he does when he’s not trying to kill or mutilate everyone. “Might be getting all motherfucking dangerous up in here. You get your chill on, my best motherfucker.”

Karkat exchanges a look with Sollux, horrified where the other is grimly accepting.

“Rose, tell me what is wrong.”

The arm jolts, whirs another few inches and jolts again.

“You’d really like him! Oh, what’s that?” Jade takes a step forward so that she can take a closer look at the machine. “I think that might be writing.”

“Rose should take a look at it,” John says and turns. Whatever he sees, he seems to understand that sticking around when the machine is making a shitty attempt at all-metal square-dancing is a bad idea. He pushes Jade away from it and she stumbles into Terezi, who gives Dave a look of ‘I don’t know what to do with this human’ but puts her hands on the girl’s shoulders to brace her anyway.

The arm clicks and whirs, moving smoothly as if it is scanning the room. It rotates from one side to the other, again and again, too slowly to be anything but ominous.

John uses his powers to fly himself up and past the arm, the light at the top of the machine blinking red erratically like a message in Morse code. 

yr

“EGBERT WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING GET THE FUCK DOWN HERE RIGHT THE FUCK NOW!” Karkat screams at him.

It’s a hero move that doesn’t work out all that well for anybody. Moving more quickly than John apparently expected, the arm cuts through the air and lunges at him as he tries to execute a neat flip and land on the console. He twists himself backwards instead and shakes it off, drawing the arm out and away, thinking about his next move.

Giving his bro some time to realise that his only two options are to leave the angry metal box alone or become fatally wounded, Dave de-captchalogues some broken swords and hurls them at the arm. “Better get back, Tav,” he murmurs and flash-steps out of the way when the arm turns its attention to him. It hovers, clicking, jolting, and lunges.

Tavros, who was obediently spinning his wheels as confidently as he could, is cut deeply in the shoulder by the sharp end of the arm. He stares at it, embedded in his flesh, in shock.

There’s silence in the room. It pulls out slowly, blood spilling out over his arm, dripping heavily onto the ground. He makes a breathless sound of pain and surprise.

Then John rushes the machine, landing a heavy blow before it swipes at him. Dave sprints in to help his bro and avenge his other bro, stripping panels from the arm with his sword, grimacing with the force he puts into his blows–

They work together to put it permanently out of commission, with Sollux calling out his advice to them – ‘You can’t kill a computer jutht by hitting it!’, ‘It’th not going to get any weaker!’ and something about machines being like crabs that get angry when you hit them, who knew. He sees that Jade does a quick patch-up job of Tavros’ shoulder, he’s gripping onto her hand tightly enough that his fingers are human-pale instead of healthy troll-gray–

“DAVE!” The scream is so loud, blood-curdling, that he wonders where Rose has been keeping all her volume, shakes his head and strikes at the arm again.

John does some acrobatics only physically possible with his god-tier abilities, flipping around like he’s a fish out of water trying to keep itself alive. Grimacing, Dave brings his sword down on an exposed wire, robot-muscle he can sever that might just kill the damn thing–

His sword breaks in half.

He looks at it. “Well, shi-” _t, it keeps happening._

A light is shot from the arm, straight into Dave, who is caught up in it and immediately disappears. The arm drops and the light goes off on the machine. The others never hear his sweet Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff reference prior to his apparent death at the cruel and ironically literal hand of alien robotics.

Terezi falls to her knees, holding tightly onto her cane to keep her upright.

There’s the heavy clanging sound of John pummelling the limp arm of the machine, smashing it into pieces, face tight with anger and confusion. Panel and wiring skids across the floor, falling still and silent as the rest of them.

“What kind of machine is this?” Kanaya’s voice is calm but her thoughts are disjointed.

“Where is he?” Tavros’ voice is soft, almost desperate. He stares at the place where Dave was.

“On Alternia.”

Each of them turns to Rose, who smiles as benevolently as a Seer really ought to before she divulges plot-centric information.

“...what the fuck?” Sollux says finally.

Karkat scowls at her. “Alternia’s gone.”

“Yes. But none of us can plaintively deny that it once existed. A planet lost in a universe abandoned, far beyond the reach of human fingers. Destroyed now, but once for feet to tread. And this machine is even more complex than I have come to expect from this place.”

She takes a moment to draw out the suspense, appreciating their undivided attention. “The influence of this machine cannot be overestimated. Though I knew what it was capable of, and what it would do, I did not truly believe until I saw it brief moments ago–”

“What happened to him?” Sollux cuts her off.

“Are you saying that Dave has gone back to Alternia?” Kanaya is a little breathless and her words set off the other trolls.

“Oh fuck no. He’ll be dead in thecondth.”

Terezi presses her forehead to the cane, leaning fully against it.

Karkat pushes away from Gamzee. “What? You mean that machine can take us back?”

“Whatever ideas you’re having, get rid of them immediately,” Rose says, narrowing her eyes. “We’re here for a reason. Dave, it seems, is there for a reason. Any reality where you attempt to use the machine for your own perceived benefit leads to a doomed timeline. It doesn’t work that way, and it oughtn’t, because he has gone back to a time when you and your friends lived on Alternia. Attempting to send yourself or any other troll back would result in a paradox.”

“Why is he there?” Kanaya asks quietly.

“That end will reveal itself.”

“Sorry? What did you say, Tavros?” Jade leans close to him, trying to make out what he is murmuring. His wide eyes turn to her and she gasps at something that only she hears.

Rose spares them a glance before going on. “Dave is quite safe – well, as safe as one can be on Alternia,” she amends. “It’s not a very welcoming place.”

“Shut up. It made us stronger,” Karkat says gruffly.

“Oh, I have no doubt it did that. Perhaps Dave will appreciate the change in environment.” 

“Rose, what happened to him? What’s going on?” Jade asks, holding on to Tavros’ hand.

The air around Rose seems to darken as she raises her hands, palms-up, and the corner of her mouth quirks in an unsettling imitation of a smile. “Yes,” she says and it’s almost a hiss. “I have seen it. Not the future, though we all may consider it as that, but the past, for the first time with such clarity. I can still feel the searing heat of the sun in my vision, the biting wind, the language of animals in my bones, never as weak and fragile and human as at that time, in that place, where I truly felt myself to be. Where Dave was and is now. Alternia.

“This piece of machinery compelled him there, back and in a changed body. At a level beyond our god-tier powers, possessed only by science or perhaps nature, for now I have seen nature do incredible things. It sent Dave through time and space, to before his own, _second_ birth on a planet we can only know to be different from Earth, but which he will have to _understand_.”

The light strands of her hair have lifted away from her skin as she speaks. The whites of her eyes are somehow brighter, even as the air darkens, reminding them of the time she had gone grimdark. No one is able to raise their voice to her.

“Dave.” She closes her eyes and the fingers of one hand curl. “Born again.” The fingers of her other hand curl. “In a foreign land.” She tilts her head to the side. “In a foreign body.” Her head tilts to the other side. “But still Dave.” She sighs. “My brother.” Her eyes open.

“And he will grow in his own time, while we watch him, here. And I know that one day he will be with us again.”

* * *

You curl up in your egg-sac. The slime is warm and you feel comfortable in here. You know instinctively that the world outside is dangerous and you have no place in it. Things are going to try to kill you. Here it is easy and quiet. You can hear your quick, erratic heartbeat and the gentle sloshing of slime when you move. You would sigh, but that’s almost guaranteed to involve you choking on some of the warm stuff you’re suspended in here.

* * *

“Wow,” John says, for something like the fifth time.

They’ve crowded around Rose’s laptop, which is running a version of Trollian. On the screen are ten different coloured lines, the ‘active’ timelines, with the ‘inactive’ timelines in another window and the ‘future’ timelines tucked away behind them. Rose had quickly closed the window for ‘alternate’ timelines before any of them could look at it, telling them that if they asked any questions they were jeopardising people’s lives and that was just too inconsiderate.

The ‘active’ timelines were those of everyone from their session – the four humans and six remaining trolls, Kanaya, Terezi, Sollux, Tavros, Gamzee and Karkat. They had watched with abject horror/fascination as she opened up a screen showing Dave at this point on his chronological timeline.

“Though these events are technically occurring in the past – years, or sweeps, ago – if we consider it chronologically, and I will for the sake of ease, this is what happens next for Dave. That is to say, Dave was here minutes ago and was sent there. He is by that account, Present Dave. Though this is Dave in a past setting. The Trollian client enables us to watch him grow up and go into his ‘future’, chronologically. All at once we have past, present and future Dave. While we can’t influence his life in that world we can certainly observe it,” Rose had lengthily explained, with excitement that was hardly disguised.

And in that little window, which the trolls had seen many times before, was an egg. It sat in a crack in the wall with only one other egg beside it, which had long been abandoned by a lime blooded troll. As they waited for the egg to hatch and the wiggler-who-was-supposedly-Dave to come out of it, they argued over whether he had a rare blood colour or a mutation.

“Why does it have to be either?” Rose asks curiously.

“The placement of the eggs is uncommon. It is possible he and the other were being protected from scavenging monsters who would find their eggs irresistible, tearing them open prematurely and killing the wigglers inside,” Kanaya explains. “It is similarly possible that the dolorosa placed them there out of pity, to protect them from untimely culling at the identification, by the monsters, wigglers or prospective lusii, of their mutated blood colour. Considering the lime blooded wiggler, it is unclear which situation is Dave’s.”

“If Dave ith in there at all,” Sollux mutters.

“The other egg is hiding Dave’s.” Jade touches her fingertip to the screen.

“So?”

“Whoever put them there was doubly protecting him. I guess Dave has a really rare blood colour, or a really bad one.” She glances at the trolls in the room. “Why is he taking so long to come out?”

“Lazineth,” Sollux says dismissively.

Karkat looks at him, then down at his hands, then back up at Jade, his expression unusually hesitant. “Fear.”

* * *

After a while you get bored. It’s nice being warm, it’s nice being safe, but your many little legs start kicking around with too much energy. The slime sloshes heavily, going halfway up the side of the egg-sac before coming down again, coating the whole thing prettily in goop. You would giggle, but you’re too cool for that. Also you’re a wiggler and that’s not something you’re supposed to know how to do.

The egg slips, rolls a little way somewhere, and you scramble to keep even with ground when you’re being pushed blindly like this, at the whim of cruel, cruel gravity. You don’t mean for it to but the sac pops open. Your warmth drains away and you have pretty much no choice at this point except to crack the egg open and make it look like you did all that deliberately. Hopefully anyone who is watching you right now knows that the clumsiness was ironically orchestrated and doesn’t question your inherent coolness.

You lie on the dirt, tiny rocks poking at your tender skin, slime coming slowly out from the sac and over you in cowardly submission to your newfound enemy, gravity. You roll over lazily, letting your eyes adjust until you can see, well, rocky and all his friends. The party’s so crowded all of them are piled up on top of each other, pressed in until it’s Santa’s hell up in here. He’s come in with his gifts of tiny-ass painful-as-shit-to-lie-on rocks, seen this geological jamboree, said ‘fuck it’ and just thrown them all over the ground, for your lying pleasure.

It’s cold and you’re not feeling so great about this whole wiggler thing.

You stretch your little legs out above you. Slime drips onto your face and you think you deserve it for not remembering that gravity is still after your shit. Shaking yourself, you stand up, unbalanced because you’ve never done it before, but naturally coordinated enough to manage it without falling over. A rock sticks in one of your feet. You dip it in slime for good measure and go out into the bigger part of the cave.

* * *

They’re watching as wiggler-Dave cracks open his egg and tumbles out of it, lying uselessly in the slime for a few minutes before getting up and wandering out from where he was hidden. Karkat is about to say something along the lines of ‘finally, even as a troll Strider has to play coolkid and make a dramatic entrance’, but when he sees him properly for the first time, in the poor light of the birthing caverns, what he says instead is, “No. Shit. No.”

There’s a collective sigh among the trolls, with Terezi visibly torn between licking the screen and breaking down, Kanaya putting her hand on her face and Tavros gritting his teeth.

“What, Karkat?” John turns to him.

“What do you think, moron?”

“He’s a rust blood,” Rose says as a test of their reactions, managing to sound hopeful and resigned at the same time.

“He’s a mutant,” Karkat corrects her. “Just like me.”

“But that’s okay. You’re here, you ended up fine–”

“I spent every day of my life hiding my blood colour even from my closest friends, Egbert. I kept my text gray. I fought against the red coming through in my eyes. If I so much as cut my finger on a blade of grass and a drone saw it – or one of my neighbours, anyone – I was going to be culled, no questions, just like that. Every day of my life. Not even a lowblood. Off the hemospectrum. I consider myself lucky Gamzee is fucked up enough to pity me, even though he’s a highblood–”

“Well, he’s not the only one that likes you, Karkat!” John says fiercely. “If you’d told your friends I’m sure–”

“I wouldn’t have turned him in and I don’t think Nitram would have even thought about it,” Sollux tells John seriously. “Aradia definitely wouldn’t have done it when she wath alive. But we’re all lowbloodth. It doethn’t mean all that much to uth and we take care of our own–”

“I found out a long time ago and didn’t tell anyone,” Terezi says.

Karkat gives her a grateful look before turning back to John. “It’s not about friendship when you’re a troll. It’s about the Condesce by whose grace we’re even allowed to be born, who we’ll all serve when we’re old enough, if we’re strong enough, and about the hemospectrum, which is fucking important to us, okay?”

“Then what about Dave?” John asks softly.

“If he can keep a low profile the way Karkat tirelessly did, he will be safe,” Kanaya answers.

They all share a worried look.

* * *

When you come to a point in the cave where there are two choices – right, which is more brightly lit but echoes resounding screams of terror and obvious signs of death and bad shit, or left, which is a little darker but quiet as the grave, you go left. If anyone was watching you right now, perhaps in a setting not unlike a movie theatre where your life plays out on a too-small screen with bad audio, they would agree amongst themselves that you have just made a terrible decision.

You wander aimlessly, doing the occasional roll or jump to get a handle on the wiggler tricks you can do, just feeling good about not running into anyone or anything else.

Shadows flit over and around you. You follow them out of the corner of your eye, counting how many there are, figuring out what the monsters they belong to might look like. When you try to whistle what comes out is a weird chirruping noise. You sound like a bird with bronchitis. You can work with that.

When they finally get their shit together and attack, you step quickly enough to the side that you wonder if wigglers are meant to be able to do that. It freaks the monsters out well enough, the stupid ones colliding with each other and immediately losing consciousness. One of them is killed, flesh torn open by the sharp spikes of another. Its red blood soaks into the ground. It smells awful and you can’t wait to get away from that shit.

They round on you and you step away, sending the crowd of them into the wall. The few that make it out, conscious and their blood still in them, wisely run off and leave you alone.

You stand there on your little wiggler legs. You look at the pile of deadly, angry monsters. You wish you had your shades to complete the cool image you’re presenting right now.

* * *

“Wow,” John says again. “I didn’t know baby trolls could flash-step.”

“Wigglers,” Karkat corrects him.

Kanaya doesn’t take her eyes from the screen. “It requires co-ordination that wigglers rarely have so early in their lives. It appears that Dave has retained some of the skills he learned when he was a human.”

“Could he time travel?” John asks.

“Unlikely,” Rose says, with enough certainty to surprise him. “This Dave is, aside from the maturity of his soul and his mutated blood colour, a normal troll. This Dave won’t play the game and won’t ever be able to reach god-tier, unless through some unforeseen circumstance he participates in a new session, or circumvents the whole impossibility through more of his time shenanigans. It’s impressive that he remembers how to flash-step, but nothing more than that.”

“So there’s no way that he’ll remember us?” Jade’s voice is sad.

Rose smiles genuinely. “I know Dave too well to say what he can and can’t do.”

“Have you seen anything? I never really understood how all of that works, but did you get any cloud visions, like on Skaia?” John asks with his usual naive excitement.

For some reason, Rose glances at her computer and touches the magic cue ball she keeps safely in her pocket, on the belief that anyone trying to steal it will try to knock it out of her modus first. The system dropped it once when she kept it in there anyway. You can never be too vigilant about potentially fate-altering magical devices. “In this program I have the means to know everything about Dave’s life on Alternia, though, as usual, I can only guess what he is feeling. Up until a point in his chronology everything is clear.”

“What happens then?” asks Jade, but her soft voice isn’t heard over Terezi’s, “Will you give us our own copies of the client?”

Rose gives the troll a considering, knowing look. “Of course. Though I would ask each of you not to immerse yourself in Dave’s timeline to the detriment of your own health.”

“Like anyone would do that,” Karkat scoffs.

“Bring your computers here if you want the modified client. If you don’t want to take any personal responsibility, everyone is free to follow the timeline on my laptop.”

* * *

You’ve been walking for a while in the darkness, knocking out any monsters that have come your way, when you see a crack about the size of you up on the wall. It’s jagged, like a monster’s claw has scratched right through. The shape is familiar and that’s enough for you to scramble up to it, closing your eyes when the sharp white light hits them, pushing through blindly as you wish for a pair of shades that would be both practical and cool as fuck. Your young eyes are sensitive to the light after being in the dark since your hatching. 

It’s just the moon, for god’s sake. Looks like going out to catch some rays ever is pretty much impossible for you.

You fall onto the ground and pick yourself up, brushing the dirt off what parts of you your tiny legs can reach. There are cold breezes and too much light. You can’t see properly, or feel the difference between dirt and rock, or taste or smell anything more than slime. All you can do is listen, picking apart the sounds of the wind, the grunts and cries of animals, the clicking and chirping of wigglers, the occasional roaring and sound of violence. You’re far away from that chaos and happy enough not to be a part of it. With careful steps you go in the opposite direction, flinching inwardly when sticks crush under your feet and leaves brush your sensitive horns.

Eventually your eyes adjust and you can see that you’ve gone away from a dirt field and into a forest. The trees are impossibly tall and you can admit to yourself, here on your own, that you’re a little bit scared.

Your horns push into something soft and you stand still with wary surprise. Warm air is breathed onto your back and a furry thing nudges you. You click and are about to flash step out of there when blunt teeth gently close around your horn. You’re lifted up off the ground, high enough to hurt if you’re dropped. The movement stops and you struggle to thwart gravity, swinging and grasping until there’s fur tickling your feet and you see the huge eyes of a lusus _right fucking there_.

They’re round and a little stupid and you fall in love with them at first sight.

The lusus huffs a noisy breath, raising the muzzle that you’re standing on. You chirrup and fall onto it, hugging the soft, white fur and feeling safe the way you did in your egg. It turns and carries you into the depths of the forest.

* * *

John can’t stop laughing. “Strider’s lusus is a pony!”

“Mutant hoofbeatht.”

“I have never seen one like that before,” Kanaya says.

“He...hugged it!” John clutches at his stomach, falling backwards onto the ground. “Did you see that! Did you!”

Rose watches the screen with an adoring smile on her face. “I think it’s cute.”

That sets John off again. “Cute!”

Terezi prods him with her cane, teeth bared and glinting.

“Nothing is sacred to you, is it John.” Karkat grimaces. “Not the ever-present danger to mutants in Alternian society, or the value we place on our lusii, who are our custodians and only constant companions until we march-”

“Like family?” Jade says and John promptly stops laughing.

“There aren’t the same feelings of love and affection between a troll and their lusus, but in practically every other way it is a familial bond,” Rose confirms.

“Humans, do not love each other, uhh, sometimes, right?” Tavros goes on when she nods. “You do not have to, uh, love each other, to be family related?”

“It’s a relationship that depends upon blood or closeness, so yes-”

“It’s like that with lusii,” Tavros interrupts her to most everyone’s surprise. “Sometimes, we are very, very close to them. When mine died, I was... Uh, sorry.”

“No, thank you for telling me.”

“He doesn’t even have a non-mutant lusus to protect him,” Karkat says lowly.

Kanaya nods. “Either one of them will be culled if they are detected.”

John blinks up at the ceiling with Terezi poking him sharply in the stomach.

“I think we need to get some chairth in here.”

Everyone murmurs their agreement.

* * *

Enter name.

Your name is STRIDER and you are going to skip this introduction bullshit because the drones are fucking chasing you again. They never get tired of it, but you do. It’s like they can smell the MUTANT RED BLOOD in you from seasons away.

Thankfully your SWEET-NATURED LUSUS, MAPLEHOOFBEAST, has ambled into the forest to find some more grass for you both to eat. She’s never understood that grass makes you sick, a lesson which you learned after a fortuitous week of near-starvation when you were two sweeps old. You were so unused to physical wellbeing that you thought you had become some kind of god. Now you just take the grass she brings you and hide it away in your hive, to give back to her later. Yours is a HAPPY and COMPLETELY ILLEGAL existence.

> Strider: Evade capture.

The DRONES don’t seem to give a shit that they are breaking branches and crushing leaves and insects underfoot. They snarl at you, legs working quickly, spikes cutting into the trees that they push roughly past. If they weren’t just doing their jobs, you would think that they are HUGE DICKS. You have lived in the ALTERNIAN FOREST all of your life and HATE to see it decimated needlessly like this.

Sprinting, you lead them to where the trees are gnarled, black bark with the luminous white of feathers threaded into it. Cocoons hang from their branches, huge and thick. A drone crashes into one, stupidly cutting it open to get past. You feel a little sick when you see the unformed, curled up body of a SKYRIDER ooze out onto the ground, coated in slime.

You brace yourself against a tree, half-hugging it with one hand on the smooth bark. The drones slow down, taking this as your surrender. They reach their too-long fingers out to you...even though you’re just a kid, they’ll crush your body and throw it onto the mountainous pile of those they’ve culled...

> Strider: Evade capture better than that!

You have to be patient and let time do what it’s going to.

Masses of white drop silently behind the drones, wings unfurling and brushing the ground. In a second their languid movements become violent and sharp, cutting the head clean off the drone closest to you, the arm of another, claws ripping into their chests and tearing out everything important, until the drones fall to the ground, bleeding out sickly green onto skyrider territory.

The leader pads over to you, with the body of a lion and wings and head of a bird. You reach out a hand to touch its feathers and it warbles at you. You live peaceably in the forest and respect your animal neighbours. You trade favours and items with them, though the skyriders help you out of old affection for the wiggler that once tumbled onto their territory and fell asleep next to one of their young.

A couple of them help you drag the bodies of the drones back to your hive before disappearing into the trees.

You kick the shoulder of the asshole who opened the cocoon. There’s not much of him left. Marked by the slime, the skyriders have ravaged him out of the animalistic need for revenge.

You kick him again, frowning.

> Strider: Get rid of evidence.

Before you can get to work slicing the scales, spikes and plates off the drones, a PALE-SKINNED STRANGER appears next to you.

“Ah,” he says.

You wipe your claws, bloodied from moving the bodies, on your jeans and stand up as straight as you can. Whoever this guy is, he’s a lot taller than you and also COOL AS FUCK. You can’t try to intimidate him, but you can make yourself look less like the WEAK TROLL KID that you are. “Hey,” you say.

“Yeah. How old are you?”

Only your MOIRAIL knows that, and even though she’s constantly reminding you and gives you the well-intentioned gift of a calendar every time you meet, you can never remember how old you’re supposed to be. Twenty-six is what you immediately think, but that’s a ridiculous answer that wouldn’t fly with this coolkid.

“Three sweeps,” you guess.

He smirks. “Nah, I remember this now. You’re five sweeps, little man. Congratulations.”

You nod indifferently.

“Not sure how to say this to myself, but I’m you.”

“Cool.”

“From the future.”

“Did I become a lusus in the future?”

“What?”

“Your skin, dude. What’s up with that.” You’re pretty pale as trolls go, thanks to living in the depths of the forest and being overly sensitive to the sun, but your skin is still healthy troll-gray, not lusus-white.

He looks at his arm and then at you. “Weird time shit,” he says.

You crouch beside the drone carcasses and ignore him.

He laughs. “You’re sharp, kid. I’m an alien.”

“So I’m an alien?”

“Nah. Yeah, just... This time the answer really is, ‘weird time shit’.”

“Okay,” you say, dragging a sharpened claw along the sinew of muscle holding a plate to one of the bodies. It’s neat, clean work and you set it down beside you, moving onto the next.

He touches it with the toe of his shoe. “Have you been keeping your eyes covered?”

You gesture absently at the canopy overhead.

“Strider eyes are sensitive. You’ve got to protect them from the sun and drones and shit.” When you don’t say anything, just keep cutting off pieces of natural armour, he crouches down next to you and puts his own shades on your face. “There. Take care of them, little man. This is a Strider family tradition.”

You touch them with the tip of a claw. You have a lot of questions for future you – why is he talking like there’s more than one Strider, can he explain what weird time shit is, what’s family, how is he going to keep his own eyes safe if he’s just handed you their protection – but you don’t voice them, looking at his bright, red eyes as he smiles, unguarded.

His attention goes eventually to the pile of plates on the ground. “Why aren’t you captchaloguing those? Gotta be careful, never know when the drones’ll come back.”

“Don’t have a modus,” you mutter, embarrassed at your own poverty.

After a while of silence, his arms sweep through the air, like he’s pressing something down to a smaller size, putting his palms tightly together and opening them to reveal an orange card. He holds it out to you and when your unquestioning fingers have barely touched the card it disappears. There’s the sound of cards being dealt and dozens of yellow ones, layered uncomplicatedly on top of each other in an easy vertical grid, appear in the air in front of you.

“It’s a continuity modus,” he tells you as you stare at it. “You have to wait until you need the item on a card to use it – but because we’re badass Knights of Time that doesn’t mean shit. Take what you want and use it whenever. Have fun, little man.”

There are already items on the cards and as soon as you think, _that is a shitty skateboard_ , the card clears and the skateboard is floating away from you. Future alien you grabs it before it can go too far and holds onto it for you. Leaning forward, you touch a card that has a pile of candies on it and catch them when they drop out of the modus.

He’s already given you these sweet shades, you can’t take his modus too.

“What about all your stuff?” you ask.

He sits back, putting his hands on the ground on either side of him. “It’s yours. It’s not like I can do anything with it, and I don’t want to lose it later when we transform.”

“What?”

“There was this TV show back on Earth, where robots got together to make one big robot, and they were called transformers...” he says with his incredible wisdom.

“I’m not riding on your shoulders or anything, dude-”

“Don’t worry about that.” He grins at you, teeth unsettlingly blunt and small. “Enjoy being a kid. Take care of yourself and look out for your friends. Don’t get into any time loops until you’re old enough. Be cool. Be a Strider. Or, be Strider, I guess.”

“When do I become you?” you can’t help but ask.

“You’ve already been me. Don’t worry about it.”

He stands up, brushing the grass and dirt off his hands. Then he disappears before you can give the shades or modus back, or ask any more questions you’re not meant to have the answers to yet.

Before you can worry about it, you get a message from your moirail.

> Strider: Answer troll.

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] began trolling cutbackCronus [CC] -–

AC: i - s e e - y o u - h a v e - n o t - c h a n g e d - y o u r - f o n t - c o l o u r |  
AC: i n - t h e - i n t e r e s t - o f - k e e P i n g - y o u - a l i v e - i - w o u l d - s u g g e s t - t h a t - y o u - c h a n g e - i t |  
AC: P r e f e r a b l y - t o - a - n i c e - a n o n y m o u s - g r a y |  
AC: b u t - i - w o n t - b e c a u s e - y o u - n e v e r - l i s t e n - t o - m e - a b o u t - t h i s |  
CC: what else are you doing thats not as depressingly futile  
AC: y o u r e - a w f u l |  
AC: i - f o u n d - t h e - n o t e - i - w a s - l o o k i n g - f o r - t o - f i n i s h - t h e - l a n d d w e l l e r - P i e c e |  
CC: thats great  
CC: it was a g sharp wasnt it  
AC: i t - w a s - a - g - s h a r P |  
AC: y o u - a r e - r e a l l y - a w f u l |  
CC: is it ready for me to hear  
AC: a l m o s t |  
AC: l a d y - m a r y - i s n t - h a P P y - w i t h - t h e - m e l o d y - s o - w e r e - P r a c t i s i n g - i t |  
CC: if you want any help just say the word  
CC: its not like im doing much here  
CC: just cleaning up the mess the skyriders made of some drones and meeting my future past alien self and shit  
CC: oh hey i have a modus now  
AC: w h i c h - v e r s i o n - i s - i t |  
CC: continuity  
CC: theres a lot of cards and i use it how i want its pretty cool  
AC: i - h a v e n t - h e a r d - o f - t h a t - o n e - b e f o r e |  
AC: b u t - i m - g l a d - y o u - h a v e - s o m e w h e r e - t o - P u t - a l l - o f - y o u r - n o t h i n g |  
CC: it came fully stocked  
CC: bill covered by future me so i dont have to worry about paying it off for a while  
AC: y o u - a r e - m a k i n g - l e s s - s e n s e - t o d a y - t h a n - y o u r - o r d i n a r y - a m o u n t - o f - s e n s e l e s s n e s s |  
CC: im just happy i guess  
AC: :)  
AC: i f - y o u r e - h a P P y - i m - h a P P y - t o o |  
CC: you were already happy cause you finished your song  
AC: t h a t s - t r u e |  
AC: i - m u s t - b e - t o o - h a P P y - t o - b e - h a P P y |  
AC: i - s u P P o s e - i - a m - o v e r j o y e d - o r - s o m e t h i n g - e q u a l l y - e x c e s s i v e - a n d - d r a m a t i c |  
CC: wow no need to go that far  
CC: calm down dulcis well keep ourselves at happy ok  
CC: thats where i am if you come back here we can be happy together  
AC: o k a y - s t r i d e r | :)  
AC: d o - y o u - w a n t - t o - c o m e - o v e r - t o n i g h t |  
CC: thatd be great  
CC: i could show you all of this sweet new stuff i got  
AC: k e e P - a - s P a c e - i n - y o u r - m o d u s - P l e a s e |  
AC: i t s - y o u r - w i g g l i n g - d a y - s o o n | n o w - t h a t - y o u - h a v e - s P a c e - i - c a n - f i n a l l y - g i v e - y o u - s o m e t h i n g - o t h e r - t h a n - a - c a l e n d a r |  
CC: i dont know if i can manage it  
CC: ive got to captchalogue all these other calendars i have around my hive  
CC: theres a lot of cards here but im also a lot of sweeps old apparently  
AC: y e s - f o u r |  
CC: my future self told me it was five  
AC: w h i c h - g o e s - t o - s h o w - t h a t - i t - w a s - r e a l l y - y o u |  
AC: c l e a r l y - y o u - a r e - i n - d e s P e r a t e - n e e d - o f - t h e - c a l e n d a r s - i v e - g i v e n - y o u |  
AC: P e r h a P s - i n - c a r r y i n g - t h e m - a r o u n d - y o u - w i l l - a b s o r b - s o m e - o f - t h e i r - h o n e s t y |  
AC: w h i c h - u n f o r t u n a t e l y - P u t s - y o u - a t - f o u r - s w e e P s - o l d |  
AC: y o u - c a n - o n l y - a s P i r e - t o - b e - f i v e - s w e e P s |  
AC: o n l y - w a i t - f o r - i t - t o - c o m e - t o - b e |  
CC: is this you teasing me about being a sweep older  
CC: is this what that looks like  
AC: f e a r - n o t - s t r i d e r |  
AC: o n e - d a y - y o u - w i l l - b e - o l d - e n o u g h - t o - u n d e r s t a n d - t h e - m e a n i n g - b e h i n d - m y - w o r d s |  
CC: ill come over after dusk  
AC: i l l - s e e - y o u - t h e n |  
AC: :)  
CC: 

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] ceased trolling cutbackCronus [CC] \--

> Strider: Get rid of evidence, properly this time.

You finish salvaging what you can from the drones and take great pleasure in captchaloguing it. When you don’t want to look at the interface anymore, or it gets in your way, it disappears only to reappear when you need it again. It’s useful and you can’t remember ever being without its constant and unfailing convenience.

When you’re throwing the bodies into the pit behind your hive for the monsters to eat, you stumble and a few of the items are jolted out of your modus. You re-captchalogue them and make a conscious effort to be more coordinated in future. Next time you fall you could lose the husktop, or that bottle of purple soda. That would really suck.

> Strider: Look at hive.

You live in an ABANDONED HIVE, which is so WELL-HIDDEN that the CARPENTER DROIDS couldn’t find it to take it down when the troll who originally lived here was marched, however many sweeps ago. There are gaping holes in the walls and the roof has fallen in, but you and Maplehoofbeast keep warm in the furs that you’ve traded for and next to the fire-pit you light every night after waking.

It wasn’t until you met Dulcis that you learned about the SOPOR you, as a troll, are meant to sleep in. Maybe it’s because of your mutant blood colour, but you have never experienced the SLEEP RAGE that the slime is meant to prevent.

> Strider: Examine contents of drawer.

You don’t have a WEAPONS DRAWER because you don’t have any weapons. Or at least you didn’t, until you gave yourself this modus. Now you have SHURIKENS, SHITTY JAPANESE SWORDS and more SWORDS THAT HAVE BEEN SNAPPED IN HALF than you could ever throw at a hypothetical oversized evil machine.

You take out one of the half-swords, labelled in your modus as BROKEN CALEDSCRATCH. Experimentally, you swing it in the air, liking the feel and weight of it. Then you re-captchalogue it, listening to the faint swish of card sliding over card.

Even without Dulcis’ present, this is the best almost-wiggling day you’ve ever had.

* * *

They watch as he becomes sickly from eating mostly grass and pale from avoiding the sun. They watch as he stumbles into dangerous skyrider territory. They watch as he chooses red as his font colour on Trollian. They watch as he is found and chased by the drones again. And again. And again.

Karkat and Sollux get thrown out of the room more than once by Rose, irritated by their shouting at the screen. When they’re gone she tries to put together the new monitors herself, under Kanaya’s watchful and disapproving gaze.

They watch as Dave, looking the way he did right before he disappeared, casually talks to young Troll Dave and gives him his iconic shades and modus.

“How...is that possible?” Jade asks.

“He must have time travelled there,” says John, frowning because he knows that can’t be what’s happened.

“He can’t go through space, though. Unless he got future me to send him there?”

“This,” Rose taps a finger to the image of a sword-wielding Troll Dave, “is the alpha Dave. He is a troll, not a human, as you can all undoubtedly see. Even if he was to reverse the change, it’s highly unlikely he would be of the same age and appearance as the Human Dave we knew. It’s certainly possible through time manipulation for him to become human, come back to tell our Dave on the meteor everything, who would go forward to ask Jade to send him to Alternia-”

“Uh, Rose, can you put this in simpler words, please?”

“-but it’s barely feasible and too dangerous at every stage to do simply to give himself those items. Dave doesn’t take risks like that unless there’s nothing left for him to lose. Unless that Dave was another, more elaborate Davesprite-”

“I don’t want to sound stupid or anything-”

“-resurrecting a doomed timeline the only, excessively dramatic way he knew how, that theory is inadequate. It’s hardly a point of discussion, because I’ve looked further along his timeline. That Dave is his dream self.”

“-but can you please put this in a way I can understand,” John finishes, then blinks. “What?”

Rose smiles amusedly at him. “Rather than saying that Human Dave became a troll, we could see it as one timeline diverging. Simultaneously we have Human Dave and Troll Dave. These two bodies are the same person, however, and share a consciousness. When one sleeps, control transfers to the other. At this point in his chronology, Dave’s dream self is still asleep, the way ours were before we entered the game - excepting Jade. It seems that later on it awakes and Dave is able to use it as a physical body, which still has the appearance, belongings and god-tier abilities from his first and human life.”

“Oh, that explains it!” Jade claps her hands together. “So that’s Dave’s human body, but his future troll self’s consciousness-”

“I’m trying really hard, guys, but I have no idea what we’re talking about.”

“-after the dream self wakes up and he becomes able to control it while he sleeps! Because his dream self still has his powers as a Knight of Time, he can time-travel, which is how he can go back and meet a younger version of himself and give him all those things. He didn’t go through space because he was already on Alternia.” Jade frowns. “But where does the dream self go when he’s awake? We haven’t seen it around his hive.”

Rose shakes her head. “I could only theorise about that without any evidence or certainty.”

“Oh, okay!” Jade turns to explain it to a bewildered-looking John. “It’s like my dreambot.”

They let him have his ‘ohhhh’ moment.

* * *

Enter name.

Your name is DULCIS SONDIA. You have a great interest in ALTERNIA’S FINER BUT LESSER-KNOWN ART, MUSIC, which you share with your MOIRAIL. You regularly have FEELINGS JAM SESSIONS and listen to each other’s AESTHETICALLY PLEASING ADVANCEMENT OF ALTERNIAN AUDITORY CULTURE.

When you are not practicing your many INSTRUMENTS, you are tending to the APPLEFRUIT ORCHARD that grows behind your hive. Though the fruits are POISONOUS and POTENTIALLY FATAL to you, they sustain your LUSUS, LADY MARY DE WING. To keep her in good health and out of appreciation for yet another thing which SETS YOU APART from the others in your lawnring, you mind the trees attentively.

You are SIX SWEEPS OLD and PREOCCUPIED with your moirail’s wellbeing and safety. If not for you, STRIDER might not still be alive. At the least he would be telling people he was over twenty sweeps old. Which is much too ridiculous to be true.

Your trolltag is acapellaControvert and you s P e a k - a t - a - m e a s u r e d - P a c e |

What will you do?

> Dulcis: Perfect land-dweller piece.

You have tried the melody on all but one of your instruments, and Lady Mary is still not happy with it. Only your ORCHESTRANOMAPHONE is left and it is entirely too CHILDISH and SILLY to fit the seriousness of the piece. You have been working on it for half a season, as a document of Alternian history. When you die you hope your music will survive you, so that others can know what it was like to live on such a militaristic and unforgiving planet.

Lady Mary takes note of your hesitation and taps her claw twice, sternly. You sigh and obediently place the instrument over your thigh, poising your fingers over the strings and keys. At her tapped out beat, one, two, three, four, you begin to play the melody.

It’s beautiful, softened by the orchestranomaphone, stiff and poignant where it relies on the keys which catch underneath your fingers, echoing from the strings when they are only barely touched. When it is over you look at your lusus, who extends her neck to you and promptly flies out of the hive.

The piece is finished. Strider is going to visit you once the sun has properly set - annoyingly enough, not because he wants to avoid detection as a mutant, but because his pale skin can’t tolerate the harsh rays. He can play another instrument and harmonise with you, but you want to show him the finished piece.

> Dulcis: Use ancient electromagnetic device.

You put the orchestranomaphone gently down and go over to the TELEPHONOGRAPH he gave you as a present on your last wiggling day. As grateful as you were and are for the thoughtfulness of it, you know that he undoubtedly stole it from some unsuspecting troll, and wait for the day when the drones will come and confiscate it.

Or perhaps they never will. You are a TEAL BLOOD, but could care less about the HEMOSPECTRUM SYSTEM which gives you not insignificant status in Alternian society. Strider might be foolish and lacking a basic understanding of troll culture, but he has his own strengths and would serve the Condesce well if he was ever allowed to march. If politics say he ought to be culled because his blood colour is outside of the hemospectrum - even exceptional in its rarity - then you don’t want any part in them. To you, culling seems UNNECESSARILY CRUEL and OCCASIONALLY UNWARRANTED.

The telephonograph is very old Alternian technology and possibly the only one left of its particular kind. It came before husktops and mobile lines as a way to faithfully record sound and communicate over long distances. This one has been so well-maintained that an uneducated observer wouldn’t know it was many centuries old. You almost didn’t accept the gift, but Strider reminded you that he couldn’t keep it at his ramshackle hive and both of you use it to record your original music and jam sessions.

As an unintentional bonus, it came with several pre-recorded pieces that helped you become reasonably proficient with your more ancient instruments.

You press a button and there’s an audible click. The wires spin and whir until there’s a constant clattering noise. One of the tiny, dim lights comes on and you pick up the first instrument, ready to layer the sounds over each other in what you think is a highly sophisticated manner of editing.

Were any Vantases or Captors watching you right now, they would surely complain loudly enough for Maryam to throw them out this time.

Whatever that means.

> Dulcis: Answer troll.

You’re completely disinterested in the commands of a person you cannot see. The only reason you’ve followed them so far is because you were planning on doing those things anyway. You’re recording the land-dweller piece now, not answering messages on Trollian.

> Dulcis: Answer troll.

Whoever it is can wait.

> Dulcis: Answer troll.

Partway into the BARITHORN part, you put the instrument down and flip a switch on the telephonograph, to end the recording and reset the wires inside. The constant vibration of your mobile line will affect the quality of the sound.

You take out the mobile line and log out of Trollian, sparing only a glance at the incoming messages to make sure none of them are in Strider’s red. Then you pick up the barithorn and continue with the recording.

* * *

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] began trolling acapellaControvert [AC] \--

TC: i know you ignor3 my m3SSag3S  
TC: what3v3r i dont car3  
TC: anSw3r thiS tim3  
TC: or ill k33p haraSSing you  
TC: lik3  
TC: thiS  
TC: anSw3r  
TC: th3  
TC: m3SSag3  
TC: Sondia  
TC: fuck  
TC: you  
TC: juSt  
TC: do it

\-- acapellaControvert [AC] has gone offline --

TC: fuck!!!  
TC: you ar3 So annoying!!!  
TC: fin3 ill tak3 thiS urg3nt Shit Som3wh3r3 3lS3  
TC: to som3on3 who car3S about the poSSibl3 d3athS and trag3dy of th3ir lov3d on3S

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] has ceased trolling acapellaControvert [AC] \--

Enter name.

Your name is TRIPEL TERNIO. You are a BROWN BLOODED TROLL and perhaps the only one of your kind to HATE THE TASTE OF YOUR BLOOD. Though you have PSIONIC HEALING ABILITIES and IMMUNITY TO POISON, you are careful to never get injured and can only be persuaded into strifing by necessity.

You live UNDERGROUND with your WASTE OF SPACE OF A LUSUS, a CRAWLER who went into a cocoon four sweeps ago and still hasn’t come out. You LIVE OFF THE LAND and occasionally the PROVISION OF YOUR FRIENDS while you wait for your lusus to mature. As STRIDER likes to remind you, it’s just a matter of time. When your lusus comes out he will be THE BEST to make up for all those sweeps of LONELINESS AND ABANDONMENT. There is absolutely no arguing with your RESOLVE that this is the TRUTH.

You are a DETERMINED young lady and hope one day to become a FOREST VIGILANTE, even though there is no presence of government for you to undermine. There’s no better feeling than taking down trespassing drones or reuniting a lost young animal with its family. You will do for the forest and those who live in it what they cannot do for themselves: HEAL QUICKLY and NETWORK WITH TROLLS. You are an OVERCAUTIOUS DEFENDER and GUERILLA TACTITIAN. The night thanks you for your sweep of service.

Your trolltag is triplicateCorruption and you Sp3ak with occaSional 3mphaSiS!!!

What will you do?

> Tripel: Stake out the perimeter.

The perimeter is secure, but you have first-hand accounts of an imminent threat to you and your friends’ safety. A fellow member of the NEIGHBOURHOOD WATCH has informed you, as is his duty, that there is a lizard lusus skirting the edge of the forest. It is domesticated and likely working on the orders of a highblood. If your experiences with highbloods have taught you anything, it’s that they’re dangerous and should be avoided at reasonable cost.

Your attempts at alerting SONDIA have failed due to her being a MASSIVE BITCH. You send a message to STRIDER letting him know of her FAITHLESSNESS TO THE COURSE OF VIGILANTE JUSTICE before sending an update to the fourth member of the Neighbourhood Watch.

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] began trolling cutbackCronus [CC] –-

TC: i hav3 r3c3iv3d r3portS of a lizard luSuS at poSition thr33  
TC: it app3arS int3r3St3d in th3 for3St for r3aSonS that hav3 y3t to b3 d3t3rmin3d  
TC: i att3mpt3d to r3lay thiS information to Sondia, but Sh3 ignor3d my m3SSag3s Sir  
TC: i would claSSify thiS a pot3ntial riSk to our coll3ctiv3 Safety  
TC: Sh3 could b3 a doubl3 ag3nt Sir  
CC: at ease  
TC: thank you Sir  
CC: no problem  
CC: ill keep watch over dulcis while im at her hive tonight  
CC: check if theres anything suspicious going on there  
CC: beyond the obvious that she doesnt really like you  
TC: comm3ndabl3 3ffort Sir  
TC: r3maining fri3ndly with th3 midblood d3Spit3 th3 thr3at Sh3 poS3S  
CC: pretty mutual feeling id say  
TC: i am pr3S3ntly at poSition on3 and will aSS3SS th3 thr3at wh3n it approach3S  
TC: w3aponiS3d and r3ady  
CC: good work  
CC: dismissed  
TC: yeS, Sir!!!

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] ceased trolling cutbackCronus [CC] –-

You check over the perimeter, though visibility is low when the sun is setting and you’re surrounded by trees, then look back down at your mobile device.

\-- triplicateCorruption [TC] began trolling absentContrectator [AC] -–

TC: Sondia ignor3d th3 m3SSag3 but Strid3r iS inform3d  
AC: it is better if he knows...as it concerns his safety...  
TC: hav3 you S33n it Sinc3 you laSt m3SSag3d m3???  
AC: it’s not in my line of sight...but i am close behind and tracking it...  
TC: any id3a wh3r3 itS h3ad3d???  
AC: the lusus has passed the tree line...i think it’s moving in the direction of your hive...  
AC: it stopped to forage for clusterberries...and does not appear aggressive...  
AC: i have not seen it interact with any of the monsters...to properly gauge its intentions...  
TC: Should i tak3 cov3r???  
AC: i think any contact with you...would be incidental...  
AC: it would be wise to go into your hive...to defend it, if it comes to that...  
TC: riSkin3SS aSS3SSm3nt rating???  
AC: two out of ten...  
TC: thatS acc3ptabl3  
TC: thank you for your hard work and communication with oth3r m3mb3rS of th3 n3ighbourhood watch  
AC: if you’re safe then i am safer...and i am similarly grateful...  
TC: im going from poSition on3 into my hiv3  
TC: updat3 m3 with itS mov3m3ntS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...and that's all I wrote! Thank you for reading this extra, unfinished part.


End file.
